"And now, here's Pat Robertson with the weather..."

[Charlie in Dayton]

http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp-dyn/A20155-2003Sep16?language=printer

Religious broadcaster Pat Robertson prayed on his Christian Broadcasting Network, based in Virginia Beach, that Isabel would turn from the coast. He asked God to put a "wall of protection" around Virginia Beach and the East Coast.

"In the name of Jesus, we reach out our hand in faith and we command that storm to cease its forward motion to the north and to turn and to go out into the sea," Robertson prayed on "The 700 Club."

Uh-huh.

Suuuuuuuuuuuure, King Canute...

(...yeah, I know the King Canute reference is taken out of context...sue me...)

[TruthSeeker]

who would he say created and aimed this storm in the first place?

Shouldn't his prayer be more like: "I see you are toying with the idea of randomly destroying some of those you love. Could you maybe not do that this once? Thanks"

:D

[Tricky]

Originally posted by TruthSeeker
who would he say created and aimed this storm in the first place?

Shouldn't his prayer be more like: "I see you are toying with the idea of randomly destroying some of those you love. Could you maybe not do that this once? Thanks"

:D
Although he actually is saying "please destroy somebody else".

I like the way Ambrose Bierce (http://www.alcyone.com/max/lit/devils/p.html) defined it:
PRAY - v.
To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

[TruthSeeker]

Originally posted by Tricky

Although he actually is saying "please destroy somebody else".




Yes of course. I omitted that from my revised prayer. My oversight. I'm sure you can imagine who he'd prefer the victims to be.

[Yahweh]

Perhaps Pat Robertson should be praying to Agur, he'll make that bad old storm go away...

[UnrepentantSinner]

This is the same Pat Robertson that predicted a hurricane (or meteor) would wipe out Orlando because of Gay Day (failed) and is encouraging people to pray for the death or retirement of Supreme Court Justices (failed so far).

I wonder how much medical help he's received for his prostate cancer. In his world, he should only need to take a day off from work and have Terry or Gordon have a Word of Knowledge to cure him.

[Zep]

He should be cartoon-ised in the form of a Chick tract. The story could be called, "The Man Who Thought He Was God".

[CFLarsen]

Originally posted by Charlie in Dayton
Suuuuuuuuuuuure, King Canute...

(...yeah, I know the King Canute reference is taken out of context...sue me...)

Not just taken out of context. In fact, you have completely reversed the legend.

As the legend of King Canute (Knud the Great, to us Danes - for some reason, Ye Englishe have a speech impediment that prevents them from pronouncing perfectly normal letter combinations) goes, he was praised in such high terms, that he decided - for political reasons also - to play a trick:

So spoke King Canute the Great, the legend says, seated on his throne on the seashore, waves lapping round his feet. Canute had learned that his flattering courtiers claimed he was "So great, he could command the tides of the sea to go back". Now Canute was not only a religious man, but also a clever politician. He knew his limitations - even if his courtiers did not - so he had his throne carried to the seashore and sat on it as the tide came in, commanding the waves to advance no further. When they didn't, he had made his point that, though the deeds of kings might appear 'great' in the minds of men, they were as nothing in the face of God's power.
Canute (Knud) The Great (http://viking.no/e/people/e-knud.htm)

If Pat Robertson was King Canute (You will receive a declaration of war in the mail one of these days for that kind of smear, buddy!), he should accept the will of god, not try to prevent it.

I suggest you go to DefCon 1. :j2:

[Charlie in Dayton]

Originally posted by CFLarsen
Not just taken out of context. In fact, you have completely reversed the legend.

Well, to reverse the legend i'd have to take it out of context, now wouldn't I?

Appears I did what I did a heckuva lot better than I explained it, didn't I? Next time I'll forget the explanation and leave 'em scratchin' their extremities...:roll:

[Kimpatsu]

Originally posted by CFLarsen
King Canute (Knud the Great, to us Danes - for some reason, Ye Englishe have a speech impediment that prevents them from pronouncing perfectly normal letter combinations
Not at all; it's just that we already have a Noddy, in the books by Enid Blyton.
What do you Danes call Big Ears? (we call him Prince Charles...) :D

[evildave]

If the storm does not come: Miracle.

If the storm does not damage his studio (no matter how much other stuff is or is not damaged): Miracle.

If the storm comes and damages or flattens the studio: God wants more money. God wants us to move. He told me so. Miracle.

[Kimpatsu]

Originally posted by evildave
If the storm does not come: Miracle.

If the storm does not damage his studio (no matter how much other stuff is or is not damaged): Miracle.

If the storm comes and damages or flattens the studio: God wants more money. God wants us to move. He told me so. Miracle.
How about, Pat Robertson shuts up? Now, that would be a true miracle.

[RCNelson]

I wonder if he'll portray the storm as God's wrath against homosexuals and atheists.

[Jabberwock]

Originally posted by Charlie in Dayton
Religious broadcaster Pat Robertson prayed on his Christian Broadcasting Network, based in Virginia Beach, that Isabel would turn from the coast. He asked God to put a "wall of protection" around Virginia Beach and the East Coast.


Cool! That means I don't have to fill my bathtub or worry about that huge tree that sits right behind my house. :roll:

[Crossbow]

Does anyone else remember when Brother Pat said that god would drop hurricanes, metors, and other such things on Florida when Disneyworld announced that they would extend job benefits to 'life partners'?

Go figure!

[CFLarsen]

Originally posted by Charlie in Dayton
Well, to reverse the legend i'd have to take it out of context, now wouldn't I?

Not necessarily. If you take something out of context, it is only open for misrepresentation. It doesn't have to mean the opposite.

Now, when Steve Grenard does it, it always means the opposite... :)

Originally posted by Charlie in Dayton
Appears I did what I did a heckuva lot better than I explained it, didn't I? Next time I'll forget the explanation and leave 'em scratchin' their extremities...:roll:

I take this as a full apology issued to the whole Danish population. You may go to DefCon 1 again... :)

[Kimpatsu]

Originally posted by CFLarsen
I take this as a full apology issued to the whole Danish population.
What, did he save your bacon?
Or are you on a roll?
:D

[Kimpatsu]

Originally posted by Crossbow
Does anyone else remember when Brother Pat said that god would drop hurricanes, metors, and other such things on Florida when Disneyworld announced that they would extend job benefits to 'life partners'?
And now god is going to miss Florida and hit North Carolina?
With a deity that lousy a shot, being a sinner is no big deal. She'll try to zap you and hit the fundie next door instead...

[Blue Monk]

Growing up in Amarillo, TX and being around tornados all my life I learned very early that God really hates trailer-parks.

[Brown]

Latest news: Pat's prayer doesn't seem to be working. From WAVY.com (http://www.wavy.com/Global/story.asp?S=1442540) in Hampton:Traffic streamed inland from the vulnerable Outer Banks on Wednesday as thousands of residents and visitors alike headed for higher ground ahead of approaching Hurricane Isabel. Thousands more were ordered to evacuate in Hampton Roads.
...
Virginia Gov. Mark R. Warner on Wednesday authorized local mandatory evacuations of vulnerable low-lying areas. Virginia Beach and Poquoson officials did so immediately, affecting about 37,000 people. On the weather page, the forecast for Thursday is: "Hurricane!"

The current Doppler weather picture shows the hurricane closer to Robertson's Virginia Beach than to any other city.

[Jabberwock]

Originally posted by Brown
Latest news: Pat's prayer doesn't seem to be working. From WAVY.com (http://www.wavy.com/Global/story.asp?S=1442540) The current Doppler weather picture shows the hurricane closer to Robertson's Virginia Beach than to any other city.


Darn and I was so sure it would work! :dl:

Local news is saying to expect widespread flooding and power outages. Good thing I live on higher ground and have a book, candles, and papers to grade. :p I'm really glad I don't live on the Outer Banks!

[Kimpatsu]

Originally posted by Jabberwock
Good thing I live on higher ground and have a book, candles, and papers to grade.
All you need now is a bell, and you can exorcise the hurricane yourself. :D

[Jabberwock]

Originally posted by Kimpatsu

All you need now is a bell, and you can exorcise the hurricane yourself. :D

I love that movie! :) Thanks but I'll leave that to Pat and the other professionals. After all, look how effective they were! :D:)

[mjv]

As I recall he caught some flack when he ran for president and it came to light that he had taken to bragging about "praying" a previous hurricane away from his area. The only problem was it miraculously "moved" to another area and killed several people.

I guess Pat didn't care enough about them to pick up the bat phone and ask God to move it along to somewhere else where the heathen live.

[UnrepentantSinner]

Jabberwock, I see you were still posting as of 6pm. Does that mean you're not one of the million+ without power, or do you have a generator?

[c4ts]

Originally posted by Yahweh
Perhaps Pat Robertson should be praying to Agur, he'll make that bad old storm go away...

What can Agur do, evolve the storm into a man?

[Brown]

It's official. There was no "wall of protection" around Virginia Beach and the East Coast. From WAVY. com: (http://www.wavy.com/Global/story.asp?S=1442540)The hurricane moved onto North Carolina's Outer Banks early Thursday and passed through Virginia later in the day, weakening to tropical storm strength by Thursday night. The National Weather Service reported gusting winds nearing 70 mph in Virginia Beach, with sustained winds in the range of 40 mph elsewhere in the state.
...
Ann Matteson, who lives about a mile from the oceanfront in Virginia Beach, said her power went out Thursday morning but that her family was dealing with it.

"We have all our camping supplies so we are ready to hang in there. It's not a problem."

In Virginia Beach, sand was being blown up onto the boardwalk along the resort strip. City police urged people to stay away from the oceanfront because of the high winds and rain.

A "small piece of the end" of the 15th Street pier was destroyed by the storm, said Allison Enedy, spokeswoman for the city of Virginia Beach. The pier, about 400 feet long, is the only oceanfront pier in the resort area. No one was on the pier at the time, Enedy said."In the name of Jesus, we reach out our hand in faith and we command that storm to cease its forward motion to the north and to turn and to go out into the sea!" -- Pat Robertson

"Up yours, Pat!" -- Hurricane Isabel

[UnrepentantSinner]

Oh I am sooooo glad I went to the CBN homepage.
http://www.cbn.com/communitypublic/pancakes.asp

[Jabberwock]

Originally posted by Brown
It's official. There was no "wall of protection" around Virginia Beach and the East Coast.

No kidding. :p I made out ok. I lost power until yesterday but always had water. No trees through the house, but my wife's Rose of Sharon departed for parts unknown. The only thing that really ticks me off is that I lost my computer (I'm at a neighbor's house right now). I foolishly plugged my computer back in soon after getting power and a resultant power surge fried the computer's power supply. It's more an annoyance than a tragedy really (I already have one on order).

[Aristotle]

I tried offering the Hurrincane some marshmellows in hopes of it changing course to go after them. Only the hurricane threw them back it. I guess big, strong storms are too bad for marshmellows :mad:

[Upchurch]

Should have tried Jello. Everyone loves Jello.

[Brown]

It's official. There was no "wall of protection" around Virginia Beach and the East Coast. Here's another Pat Robertson "Blast from the Past." Robertson, invoking the name the deity for whom he (Pat) has appointed himself as spokesman, tried to use mystical means to cause a hurricane to miss Virginia Beach. The hurricane hit the city head-on. Now, the damage wasn't all that bad, but what Pat prayed earnestly for (and in the correct form!) did not occur. If we take the Bible's story of the Contest on Mount Carmel as an indicator, this incident could represent affirmative evidence that Robertson was a false prophet and that his religion was false.