Family nudity

[Iamme]

Is it normal, or not normal, for family members to run around their house, in the nude: Parents and kids...no matter what the ages?

This is not just a silly subject. I am sort of of the persuation that this practice is more healthy than harmful. To have to grow up in a Puritan like household, where you don't find out what the opposite sex looks like, until you leave home, (except what you can sneak and see in 'dirty magazines') can be intimidating...I think. I know. I have always been jealous of families that I learn who live quite loosely, in all kinds of regards; this included.

But families who live like this...that even bathe together and everything else; is this even legal?


Once, when I lived on a beach, a whole family...kids ranged from like 5 to into the developed-stage teen years, wanted to know if I knew where the 'nude beach' was.

Sure, I realize that probably MOST families aren't quite always this 'open'...but they don't have coniption-fits either if someone was 'caught' viewing another family member in the buff.

What is your opinion of this? And/or do you have insight into how most people are, in this regard, while in private, at home?

[Bikewer]

We were remarkably "unshy" while the kid was living at home, never thought much of it.

I've read quite a bit on human sexuality and paraphilia, and the late John Money laid the blame for a lot of sexual disfunction and paraphilia on our bizzare attitude towards children and sex.

In cultures that don't make a huge effort to hide sex from children, and allow children the normal sort of exploratory play that they will normally indulge in, there is very little incidence of paraphilia.

[QuarkChild]

This might belong more in the Education & Social Issues section, but my opinion is that it sounds like a healthy, liberated lifestyle, although I don't think it's "normal" in the sense of being both a common behavior and commonly accepted. I personally have no desire walk around nude with my family, but I think it's great that there are people who have managed to resist succombing to the Puritan inhibitions that are endemic to this country. So it might not be socially normal, but as far as I know it's psychologically normal.

slightly off-topic:
I've never understood the Dear Abby rule that children over 2 years of age shouldn't see an opposite sex adult naked. Why the heck not? (Maybe a child psychologist can tell me.)

I'm not sure whether it's appropriate to decide this issue on the basis of laymen opinion, though. This could be treated as an empirical question--either family nudity has intrinsically negative consequences, or it doesn't. Sociological studies on the subject might be extremely difficult to execute rigorously, but the attempt could be made.

[QuarkChild]

What's paraphelia? Merriam-Webster didn't have a listing for it.

[American]

I think hippie-nature types are the only ones who do it. I think it's OK for them. I don't think the other 98% of civilization should do it though, not unless they got clothes on or at least a large towel, or a medium towel carefully knotted with no chance of coming loose. Definitely not a small towel, or even a poncho for that matter.

[a_unique_person]

Originally posted by Bikewer
We were remarkably "unshy" while the kid was living at home, never thought much of it.

I've read quite a bit on human sexuality and paraphilia, and the late John Money laid the blame for a lot of sexual disfunction and paraphilia on our bizzare attitude towards children and sex.

In cultures that don't make a huge effort to hide sex from children, and allow children the normal sort of exploratory play that they will normally indulge in, there is very little incidence of paraphilia.

We always tried to not make too much out of it as our kids grew up, but now that they are at the teenage stage, it seems to matter to them. So we don't go around in the nude any more.

[Bikewer]

hehe- I spelled it wrong.

http://www.wylde.com/paraphilia.html

The late John Money was generally considered to be the major authority, and wrote a number of books on forensic sexology, paraphilia, and various other aspects of human sexuality.

[c4ts]

Don't them hippies let their youngins run around naked?

[SteveW]

We never had a problem with anyone naked in the house. But then we are fairly open. Our kids even knew by their preteen years that we were "swingers" and that sex was fun, not dirty.

[TheMashiah]

Your sister nude turns me on. That's all I have to say about that.

[UKBoy1977]

Oh man I'm glad someone has brought up this topic because I have gotten crap from my friends for this for SO many years!!


Pretty much every friend I have had has said my family are weird because we have always had no problem being naked in front of each other. That was me, my brother and my mother and father.

My question is this:

"What is the problem with it? What justification can you give for this being wrong?"

People talk as if it is one step away from incest! I always say to them "If you can't be naked in front of your Mom without thinking about sex then maybe it's you that has a problem!"

[Ove]

People talk as if it is one step away from incest! I always say to them "If you can't be naked in front of your Mom without thinking about sex then maybe it's you that has a problem!"

Spot on i'd say. The problem is that the "Moral standards" in most societies are set by old men who drool if they se a female bellybutton and nudity to them is absolute equal to sex. Off course there is nothing "wrong" with nudity it is after all the way we come into this world.
I've never understood the Dear Abby rule that children over 2 years of age shouldn't see an opposite sex adult naked. Why the heck not? (Maybe a child psychologist can tell me.)

I've never heard of that rule. Where does that come from? Over here our day-care centers has multi-seat uni-sex lavatories for the children up to 7 years and nobody see anything sexual in that.

[UKBoy1977]

I think it's all to do with the Oedipus complex, penis envy and fear of castration etc.

However I think these days all that Freudian stuff is taken with a pinch of salt by most psychologists.

[Denise]

I don't see a problem with my child seeing me naked. Damn, when she was 2-4 she would always burst into the bathroom when I was using the toilet. Now that she's older she doesn't usually bother me but will occasionally pop in to ask for something when I'm taking a bath. Granted, I don't walk around the house naked as a general rule. Not my thing.

But now that she's ten she doesn't want anyone else to see her naked! She's already freaked about having to shower before swimming in middle school! I think it's all normal for the age.

I don't have a son, but I'm sure the dynamics would change a little with age.

[Jon_in_london]

Originally posted by UKBoy1977
"What is the problem with it? What justification can you give for this being wrong?"


Because the sight of naked flesh corrupts you morally and might faint, or have a heart attack.... airliners might plunge out of the sky....worse than smoking reefer!!...everyone will turn into a commie!!!

[Suezoled]

Erm. My last housemates. They were married. She had a kid from a previous marriage. I did not like seeing them run around the house naked. They were ugly people in many ways, including physically. The little boy would sit in front of the tv masturbating away. The adult guy would be using the toilet with the door open. The only other girl would be lounging around with her robe open completely naked otherwise.

They made it clear I was NOT family (which I was not, just a border), but in this case, it always made be very uncomfortable. When anyone tried to barge in on me in the bathroom, they would either get thrown out by me, or I would launch a shampoo bottle at their head.

[nightwind]

Probably ok, in most instances. As far as family bathing, etc., I could forsee some instances in which very young children making utterances about the family communal bath, could be misinterpreted, and might could blow up into some kind of bizarre false abuse allegations, but this would probably only happen on occasion and only in our country, where there is such a hysteria about such things.

It seems that families that practice nudism together, seem to have a healthier and more accepting attitude about their bodies, and I really do not see any evidence whatsoever to it contributing to incest, etc.

I note that in some cultures, nudity is common and accepted, and no one thinks anything about it. And there clothing bills are very in line.

Overall, though this activity is most likely harmless, but would probably be considered the ultimate evil by others, such as the religious right, but then they seem to think everything is evil. :rolleyes:

[Iamme]

When I was in my high school years, my best friends mom broke her arm and was in a sling. She had to have my best friend (her son) put her bra on for her. When I heard him tell me this, I couldn't believe it. If it were MY mom, with the broken arm, she would rather die first!

[Glory]

My family never made much of an issue over nudity. We didn't spend long periods of time running around naked but we never bothered with running to cover up for each other either. I saw my parents naked commonly and shared showers and baths were not uncommon as it was often the best way to ensure that kids washed and rinsed properly. It was also common for my sister and I to lie in bed next to a naked parent with nothing unusual taking place. My parents did not want to have sex with me, thus, there was nothing wrong with nudity.

Nowadays, my daughter sees my husband and I naked almost every day as she insists on entering my bedroom while we are dressing. She also shares showers with me as this is the fastest way to get her bathed. She tends to shed her clothes as soon as she wlks in the house. She is comfortable naked and likes to watch cartoons and look at books without the burden of clothes. We draw the line at the front door requiring clothing if she goes outside. She's usually compliant but tends to forget pants. I often have to chase after her with a pair of pants or a skirt. She seems to have prioritized panties as being the most important peice of clothing below the waist.

Nudity is as important as you make it. There is nothing wrong with wearing clothing or not wearing it. What I don't want to do is instill in my daughter the idea that her body is shameful. She is entirely innocent right now. Why would I want to change that?

Glory

PS my daughter does not like to see my husband and I huggung with or with out clothes. She was born to be shaperone.

[belinda]

I was brought up in a family where nudity was not a problem. Mum and Dad would both walk around naked, and Dad would skinny dip in the pool. As we grew older, my brothers would not do it - but I never really got shy around my mum and dad. (I guess the fact that they were mammographers also affected this somewhat - all those naked breasts! ;) )

My husband was the complete opposite - his family was very prudish. Neither of us care if our 4yo son see's us naked - and we certainly don't make a big deal about it. I think it is healthier that way...although it is funny what kids sometime say.

I was drying him from his bath the other night, and he pointed to my breasts and asked me what they were called. (I was wearing a nightie - but it was fairly low cut) I told him and he says "I like your big breasts Mummy." Now that could definately be taken the wrong way - and I am now waiting for child services to take me away :p - but only a few days before he had also told me that he liked my big hands. To him - there was no difference.

I think we instill our children's attitude towards their bodies and their sexuality with how we react and teach them when they are young. By hiding the human body ( and making a big deal about it if you find them playing with themselves etc) you are just asking for kids to grow up with a complex about the human body being dirty and sex being a nasty thing.

[belinda]

Originally posted by Glory
PS my daughter does not like to see my husband and I huggung with or with out clothes. She was born to be shaperone.

Glory - your daughter is probably just jealous - whenever we hug - my son always wants to be included. He just pushes in between so he gets hugged too.

[Glory]

Originally posted by belinda


Glory - your daughter is probably just jealous - whenever we hug - my son always wants to be included. He just pushes in between so he gets hugged too.

I suspect you are absolutely right. She does get jealous. The thing is she is not a big hugger and kisser herself. She just doesn't like the idea of my husband and and me bestowing affection on anybody but her. When we go to include her in the hugging she runs away.

Glory

[kittynh]

I grew up with too many kids, one bathroom. Forget nudity, you have to get ready in the morning who cares!

I live in the woods, and will walk around quite nakey trying to find something to wear from the laundry room. Pool Boy has the thong bathing suit. I also like to work out pretty darn nakey. I start out wearing clothes, but it gets hot...the girls don't seem to mind. They also will walk around naked trying to find something to wear. BUt, we don't walk around naked going, "oh look, aren't we open minded!" It's nakey for a reason, not as a statement.

My girls don't like to see Pool Boy and I hugging. If I grab his incrediably tight butt (opps, that's G right?) they start to scream, "Violation of the petrie dish rule!!!!"
This is because when they once decided that parents having sex was icky, they informed us that they had decided to believe we had NEVER had sex, and they were invitro babies.