How was your day today?

[Suezoled]

Mine isn't half done yet!

I already got a case on a woman who hacked off her own finger in the kitchen (she described how she wrapped it in a clear plastic baggie and took it to the hospital.

Another guy called, furious because (ahem) he was seeing a quack about a quack medication and wanted the insurance company to pay so that he could keep being quacked (my words, of course, not his). He wanted to see an allergist who is the only allergist in the world who makes in his allergist lab a nasal spray formula that is individual and unique to him and no lab or pharmacy or drug company makes a spray like it and he has special needs so my company needs to pay for it. (deep breath for air!)

Another person who wants to send her 6 year old to a chiropractors because she doesn't want to put chemicals in his body.

A person who "needs" general anesthesia so that she could get an ingrown tonail removed. Local anesthesia is not good enough for her.

I mean, not a bad earthshattering day, but this is wearing me out and it's not even noon here... :(

[Chaos]

Working for health insurance? (or whatever it is called where you live) I could tell you stories about other parts of insurance business...well, very few I experienced myself, and certainly not all on one screwed-up day, but anyway...I guess I´ll post some of then soon - probably in the Humor forum.



As for my day...well, thanks for asking. I was on a funeral this morning. My grand-uncle (or is it great-uncle?) had died from cancer. I hardly knew him, though.
It seems all of our family only get together at funerals. My paternal grandfather died in ´90, my paternal grandmother in ´99; I never knew my maternal grandfather, and both my maternal grandmother and her partner (they never married, though they´ve been together for at least 25 years) died in ´01. Christmas at my maternal grandmother´s home, both the grandmothers´ birthdays, always were the occasions were the whole family meets - now they´re all gone.

[roger]

Pretty boring so far. There is no real work to do here, so I'm a bit bored. Which is about 100 times better than dealing with whackos on the phone! :)

This morning they finally came to restart the gas, which has been out since the hurricane. Maybe at some point I'll have hot water and steady power again.

[Suezoled]

And after lunch, there was the guy whose doctor told him to get more exercise. He wanted the insurance company to pay for a treadmill for his house. (He's not gonna get it.)

And then there's a the guy who wants a sauna in his house (he's not gonna get it).

A woman whose 11 year old child was JUST diagnosed with cancer, the woman's first concern is getting her child a $3000 natural hair wig so she won't look bald.

[Andonyx]

Of all these people, in your professional opinion...how many of them do you think are just trying to scam the company into paying for some crap they want, and how many do you think are just honestly clueless about how health insurance policies work?

[Suezoled]

The patient who was being quacked seemed to honestly believe his medicine is special and unique. I think it makes him feel good to be special and uniqur. Even if it's only for nasal spray.

The treadmill applicant and the sauna applicant KNEW it wouldn't be paid for but they tried.

The mother who wanted the wig I'm not sure of. The company does pay for them on occasion, but it worries me more that aesthetics was her first apparent concern.

Then there's the person who tried to get dance lessons paid for as physical therapy. We told the person there was no way that Square dancing or foxtrot would be considered physical therapy. Or belly dancing. Or Jazz class. Or ballet. Or line dancing. or waltz.

The person who "needed" to eat organic food was just stupid. I won't pay your grocery bill personally or professionally, stupid.

That was my day. Hope yours was better.

[Yahweh]

There were a few highlights in my day today...

It was raining all day, lots and lots of gray.

One of my friends got ahold of a bunch of orange biohazard stickers (they had a long warning about asbestos on them). He went up to another friend's truck, and plastered his car with these bright orange stickers. It was funny... except for the part where they peeled off the wall of stickers from the driverside window (how's he supposed to make left turns?) in the rain.

My friends all have an unusual sense of humor...

[UnrepentantSinner]

Sue,

I hope daily updates on the crackpots becomes a regular part of your postings here.

Here was my day. Went to bed at the crack of dawn. Woke up shortly before the sun went down. Usually my nights are a bit more eventful... but not by much. :(

[Julia]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by UnrepentantSinner
[B]Sue,

I hope daily updates on the crackpots becomes a regular part of your postings here.

That goes for me also, Sue. It made for great reading. I hope you are keeping notes so that when you finally burn out on your job you can write a book.

[Suezoled]

Some of the sadder stories the past couple days include:

1.) a man who drank antifreeze
2.) a man who hung himself and doctors don't believe he will ever wake up
3.) a man who burned to death in a house

Then there's the woman who was going to have a baby, and she called to let us know. The also let me know her baby, at 8 months 2 weeks, was not viable, and would die as soon as it was born. She was giggling while she was telling me this.

A while back there was the case of the 16 year old boy who wanted a breast reduction. Problem was, the breasts weren't considered large enough to be a health problem. Heck, they were smaller than mine, and I'm not busty at ALL. Deal with it, kid.

Before that there was a small 10 year old who had peanuts shoved up her nose.

And then there's the 4-6 frat boys who came into an emergency room. They weren't being hazed, mind you (oh yes they were). They all just happened to think of stuffing cue balls (from a pool table) into the mouths. However, the cue balls are big and they couldn't pull them back out. The boys needed muscle relaxants. I understand there was much drooling before and after.

I really think the 10 year old peanut girl was smarter.

Also, our resident pervert called my line. He asked me what color my panties were. I politely told him I knew where he lived and would rip his f*cking head off when I got off of work because I simply wasn't in the mood for his antics. He hung up on me.

[Suezoled]

Call from today:

Me: "hello. What can I help you with today?"

Her: "hello. Yaaas. I vant to make a doctor's appoint-ment."

Me: "is this just a regular doctor's appointment?"

Her: "Yaaas. I want to make an appointment."

Me: You're free to see your doctor and make an appointment."

Her: Yaas. But I want to make an appointment. How do I make an appointment."

Me: "On moment please" *put caller on hold. Slam face info keyboard. Resume conversation*

Her: "I just need to know how to make an appointment."

Me: "You have to call your doctor yourself and make an appointment."

Her: "You don't do it for me? But you pay my doctor. You should make my appointment. I want to see my doctor"

Me *gnawing my limbs off* "No. YOU have to make an appointment to see your doctor. WE only pay if you do your part."

Her: "Oh but I have to see the doctor as soon as possible. You call for me, okay."

Me: "No I won't call. You can see your own doctor. You can call yourself."

Her: "Oh! I can call myself! Oh! Ok. Bye bye."

*click*

[Eos of the Eons]

ROFLMAO!!! (some was sad yes, but you write it so funny)


You should get your own section...or there should be a new section made ....daily run-ins with woo woo lovers and whackos, and some that are just plain stupid.

You know, you could start your own web site on that!

Hey, if you don't have time, email me stories and I'll put up a page for ya on my site...please please!

[Suezoled]

Just a quick one today:
A guy is on the phone. He's convinced he's being scammed by the Physical therapy office. His line of reasoning is such:
He has X for a copay.

The hopsital that treated him for physical therapy charged $160. My company paid $140 amount, and he paid $20.

When the physical therapy was moved to an outpatient facility, priced dropped to about $30. My company paid $10, he paid $20. Because his copay is consistent, and we paid less for the outpatient therapy, he is being ripped off.

Yup yup. He gets as much Physical Therapy as he wants, but since we don't pay $140 anymore, he's getting ripped.

[Suezoled]

Last minute phone call...

Her: Hi. I'm having a surgery. Do I need to do anything special?
Me: Do you have the procedure code?
Her: Um, hold... *rustle of paper* um.... hold on... is this it? No... um,.....um...
Me:............................................... ............
Her: Um, wait, is this it? No, that's not it. Um....
Me: .................................................. ........
Her: Hello? Are you still there? Hello hello hello?
Me: I'm here.
Her: okay. Um... is this it? no, wait....
(Repeat process. For 6 very long, very excruciating minutes.)
Me: Look. We close in about 15 minutes. If you can't read the papers, call your doctor and call us right back about the code.
Her: No! Wait... oh wait. This isn't it. It has something to do with my knee, though.
Me: *I have since prayed to every god including Ed and Yahweh to smite me dead* Call us back. Otherwise we'll be here.
Her: How can you close in 15 minutes! It's on 3:45 here.
Me: That's on the West coast. You're calling the East coast.
Her: Oh fine then! I"ll call back
*click*

[Zep]

These are the people who bring the average world IQ level down to 100. Life is a mystery for them. Going to the doctor is a mystery for them. Money, clocks, cutlery, doors, hygiene and even BREATHING is a mystery for them.

Don't fret it - they are always there...

[Chaos]

Originally posted by Zep
These are the people who bring the average world IQ level down to 100. Life is a mystery for them. Going to the doctor is a mystery for them. Money, clocks, cutlery, doors, hygiene and even BREATHING is a mystery for them.

Don't fret it - they are always there...

Look at the positive side of it: these are the people that, by their example, show people like us how bright we actually are.:cool:

[Suezoled]

This one is actually from a coworker:
A woman had permission for homecare for her son. Basically, her son has an open wound on his toe and needs it bandaged daily. The Nurse (whose company we approved to see the patient)
1.) arrives late to the patient's home
2.) has no supplies of her own. (Home care nurses are supposed to have and provide the necessary equiptment to care for patients)
3.) uses an ace bandage the mother provided, and tried to use kitchen scissors used to cut raw meat to cut the bandage
4.) locked her keys in her car
5.) had a screaming match with her boyfriend at the patient's residence at 10pm when he came to pick her up.
6.) asked the pateint's mom for a coat hanger to try to unlock the car

Needless to say, the woman does NOT want these people back at her house.
Don't blame her. Don't blame her at all.

[Suezoled]

Just taken:

Me: Hello. What can I do (yadda yadda)
Customer service: I have a guy here who wants to tell you his wife is in the hospital.
Me: Okay...
*transfer caller*
me: Hello. This is Suezoled. How are you today?
Guy: Hi. My wife is in the hospital. They doctors think she only has a couple days. You know, before she dies.
*head explosion: the customer service guy did NOT tell me this was a terminal case!!!!*
Guy: I'm so sad. She's barely holding on. She's been in the hospital for 4 days. We're trying to be prepared....
Me:......................
*looks are chart*
Me: We've been monitoring the case. You don't need to do anything. We've been following and review with the doctors. Please don't worry about this. There are other things more important right now. we've got it handled.
Guy: *crying now* thank you. I'm so sad right now. She's slowly dying... the doctors think it will only be a couple more days...
*click*
Me: *writes customer service rep's name to make voodoo doll and make him SUFFER*

[Suezoled]

Another phone call:
Me: Hello (yadda yadda)
Her: What?
Me: (repeat opening)
Her: OH. HI! I need to set up a case for surgery.
Me: Okay. What's the patient's id #?
Her: WHAT?
Me: (Repeat question)
Her: What do you need that for?
Me: I need it to verify the proper id and case #
Her: WHAT?
ME: (Repeat statement)
Her: I don't wanna give it to you!
Me: then I can't help you.
Her: WHAT?
Me: (Repeat statement)
Her: Well why not?
Me: Privacy laws. I can't give out info if you aren't qualified to receive it.
Her: I've never heard of these laws!
Me: They have been actively upheld for several months now
Her: I've never heard of these laws and why should I tell you?
Me: I still cannot give you any information because not willing to verify if you're qualified to hear this information
Her: WHAT?
Me: (repeat statement)
Her: I heard you! You get your supervisor on RIGHT NOW. I've never had problems like this! You people are getting lazier all the time!
Me: okay. *ring supervisor. Supervisor explains it's SOP to ask what I'm asking.*
Her: Oh. Why didn't you just tell me you needed it?
Me: *biting tongue off in bid to bleed to death quickly*

[Suezoled]

Another phone call:
Me: (standard greeting)
Her: Hi. I'm calling from a doctor's office. The patient needs to have a bone set. He broke it.
Me: (ask for patient's id #, mailing address, phone #, date of birth, doctor's full name and phone #)
*Look up doctor's name. Eyes snap wide*
Me: Um, this doctor is only a chiropractor.
Her: That's right. Uh huh. He's a DOCTOR of chiropractics.
Me: A Chiro is not quilifed to deal with broken bones
Her: In the state of Illinois, a Chiropractor has the same status as a Medical Doctor.
Me: this patient's policy is NOT based in Illinois. The chiro is not a medical doctor. He cannot treat this patient.
Her: But he's a doctor in chiropractics!

Conclusion: case denied.

[Suezoled]

Cluess chronicle part ?:
Then there's the woman who called for her son. He needs dental surgery because his teeth were knocked out. She has no idea why she has to call the company back. I have no idea why she has to call the company back. I contact the Nurse Manager. The nurse manager has no idea why she has to call back.

So there's three of us puzzling why there was a message asking her to call us back. From our company.

[UnrepentantSinner]

Oh man, these are great.

The "WHAT?" caller would have probably gotten on my last nerve and started jumping up and down on it. Some people just need to be beaten.

[ImpyTimpy]

Great... Now thanks to the Hellcat I.D. kit and another thread I've got a result. Two bars (manual says it's positive, one bar would mean it's a negative result) when the I.D. kit was subjected to the poster in question along with a thorough scan of all previous posts by the said individual...

How do I know the kit is 100% accurate though?

[Suezoled]

Phone call:
Me: (standard greeting)
Her: *laughing* Hi. My husband was trying to be the skateboard king. He tore is quadracep as a result. We need an MRI
Me: I...erm, Skateboard King?
Her: Yeah. I told him he wasn't young enough so of course he had to prove me wrong. Skateboard King has been dethroned.
Me: I see. The changeover of power isn't always peaceful.
Her: *still laughing* No I guess not

Conclusion: MRI granted.

[Suezoled]

Me: (standard greeting)
Her: I hate you people! I hate you! I've been on the phone for 3 hours trying to get this case set up and all I get is the run around! I hate you I hate your company I hate all of you.
Me: I see your id# came up. This is a contract I handle.
Her: oh.... can I set up a case then?

[Suezoled]

Me: (standard greeting)
Her: I have a few cases I need to check.
Me: Okay. How many
Her: oh, 1, 2, 3......28.
Me: 28?
Her: yes.
Me: you call that "a couple?"
Her: well.... a few?

[Suezoled]

Best call of the day so far:

Me: Hello?
Her: Yes. I need to get my head examined.

She needed an MRI.

[UnrepentantSinner]

Here's mine.

I work security and in my building there's labs with card reader access. One of the housekeepers hits a few of the labs, another gets the rest. Only one housekeeping badge has lab access. I asked the day shift guys to tell our badge office person to give lab access to the other badge.

Her response. No, unless the lab manager authorizes it.

I suppressed the fist of death and just badge the guy in myself. So let's look at the two scenarios.

1. Bage office gives housekeeping lab access. End result, housekeeping gets into lab.

2. Badge office plays little power game and doesn't grant housekeeping lab access, I go and badge him in myself. End result, housekeeping gets into lab.

Why the hell do the day shift people have no common sense? :mad:

[Suezoled]

Why the hell do the day shift people have no common sense?

You yourself said it: it's all about the POWER (mwahaha!) Tremble you puny mortals as you cower beneath my boot like an insignificant insect as I wield the Housekeeping Lab Access Badge! :p

or maybe not.

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by UnrepentantSinner


Why the hell do the day shift people have no common sense? :mad:

I think every job that has multiple shifts goes through that. I used to do QA work in a factory and I used to wonder the same thing about night shift. Further, I was good friends with one of the night shift people and he used to ask me the same question about day shift. I think it just goes with the territory.

[Suezoled]

Oh yeah.. the very first post on this thread: the woman who chopped off her finger heartily endorses Ziploc baggies if you have any "weepy" or messy body parts to stuff in a sack. The "yellow and blue make green" seal lets you know the bag is closed tight and locks freshness in.

Okay, I made up the "locks freshness in" part, but she did mention Ziploc baggies are definately her choice if she ever loses another appendage.

I want whatever pain medication she was on when she called me. ;)

[Suezoled]

How's this for circular?

Her: I need to set up a case for date of service in July 2003.
Me: You do know this is October 2003, right?
Her: yes.
Me: I can't set up a case for a service that has already been rendered.
Her: but we didn't know the patient had your insurance at the time.
Me: I'm sorry. That's unfortunate she didn't give you her insurance info.
Her: So we saw her in July.
Me: yes.
Her: So we need to get this case set up for July 2003.
Me: This is October. You saw her in July. We can't set up cases for services that were already rendered.
Her: But we didn't know you were her insurance company at the time.
(repeat 5 times before caller finally understands what I'm saying)


Then again, that call was better than this one:
Her: my husband was in the hospital over the weekend for a heart attack.
Me: Okay.
Her: he died.
Me: oh.....
Her: then my son went into the hospital Monday.
Me: um, okay....
Her: he's just been diagnosed with anxiety disorder.
Me: oh my god.
Her: I went into the hospital for chest pains.
Me: ...........
Her: my other son is in the hospital now because he also got an anxiety attack.
Me:...... I'm...sorry...
Her: Oh don't worry about all that sweetie. I was just wondering how I change my spouse's policy so that I'll be the primary policy holder.
Me: *having sunk into a hole in the ground at this point* let me transfer you to the right department. :eek:

[Suezoled]

Amusing call of the day:

Her: This patient was in the hospital for less than 23 hours.
Me: then you need to submit the claim YYYY method.
Her: But we're going to submit it PPPP method.
Me: you said the patient was in less than 23 hours. That's technically outpatient. You need to submit it YYYY
Her: No, we're going to submit it PPPP.
Me: You are sending a bill, right?
Her: yeeeaaaaahh.
Me: And it's technically outpatient, right?
Her: yeeeeeeeessss.
Me: do you want to get paid for that bill you're submitting?
Her: you know, we can send this YYYY after all.

*Note, YYYY and PPPP are just fillers for the real submission forms. Form id's have been changed to protect the innocent. Or something like that.

[Suezoled]

There was a woman today who wanted to set up a maternity case. She wasn't even pregnant, but she wanted to be. Explaining that wishful thinking does not make for a valid reason to set up a case did not make her happy. Woman yells and screams that she wants a baby so badly and "Someone like me" wouldn't understand. Tells me God will punish me if I don't help her. I tell the woman Ed has been punishing me all day today. Woman did not think that was funny, either. :p

Now, it does turn out she had a case set up for invitro fertilization. Seems she wanted the maternity case set up because she thought the invitro WOULD GUARANTEE to make her preggars. I told the woman that case wasn't approved or denied yet. Cue the yelling and more promising of God punishing me. She's crying and asking why God hasn't given her a child. Gee lady, is it because you're acting like a neurotic twit?

I'm too tired for this today. Maybe I'll just send her a turkey baster and tell her good luck.

[Suezoled]

Oooh! You know what I could have said to that lady? "You're telling me god will punish me because your cases aren't approved yet? Inconceivable!"

Okay, that was bad.

[DoNotDisturb]

Pretty boring. I need to study later on because the SAT II is coming up and I want to make sure I get that 800 or at least 750 in Math IIC. Damn standardized tests.

[Eos of the Eons]

Originally posted by Suezoled
There was a woman today who wanted to set up a maternity case. She wasn't even pregnant, but she wanted to be. Explaining that wishful thinking does not make for a valid reason to set up a case did not make her happy. Woman yells and screams that she wants a baby so badly and "Someone like me" wouldn't understand. Tells me God will punish me if I don't help her. I tell the woman Ed has been punishing me all day today. Woman did not think that was funny, either. :p

Now, it does turn out she had a case set up for invitro fertilization. Seems she wanted the maternity case set up because she thought the invitro WOULD GUARANTEE to make her preggars. I told the woman that case wasn't approved or denied yet. Cue the yelling and more promising of God punishing me. She's crying and asking why God hasn't given her a child. Gee lady, is it because you're acting like a neurotic twit?

I'm too tired for this today. Maybe I'll just send her a turkey baster and tell her good luck.



Do you get any hormones with invertro procedures? If not, then I really hope that lady doesn't become someone's mommy.

[TwoShanks]

My Sunday :-

Today I slept until 3pm, as a side effect of my insane irregular sleep patterns which involve the inability to sleep for several days followed by a few days of at least 12 hours sleep. I checked my email, talked to my mum on the phone, and then essentially sat around trying to pass the time for a few more hours.

I watched some TV. I considered writing an angry letter to my (previously considered) ex-girlfriend and present best friend, who has barely talked to me since starting at Oxford Uni a month ago, to the point of not even replying to text messages requiring a one word answer. I checked my email, and was deeply unsurprised to find no non-spam. I bought some cigarettes. I started the fire going in the living room and sat by the fire eating peanuts and watching TV for a while. Then I read some more of 'Catch 22' for about the fifth time. Then I came on here and wrote this.

In the spaces, imagine a vague feeling that I should have more than two friends and that life should somehow be more fulfilling than this, while projecting an air of mild bitterness and affected comedy-anger to the other person in the room.

Now I will do homework for electromagnetism and quantum mechanics courses.

[Eos of the Eons]

Hey Two Shanks,

I lost my only friends to woo wooism, and I'm flat broke, etc. My husband still has a couple of friends though.

I'm still happy because of many many things, like the fact that I'm not threatened with stoning if my hair shows in public. I'm also not starving, etc.

Yeah, life could be more 'fulfilling', but it could also be hell instead of boring.

Yep, just ignore me if I sound like an oldie trying to bestow some sort of wisdom. I've just learned to appreciate that I'm not in Iraq, or any other place where life is a little too interesting.

Again, just ignore me if this only annoys the sh*t outta ya.

[TwoShanks]

Oh, I didn't really mean to sound like I was complaining about the way my life is right now, I know things could be a lot worse (because they have been in the past), and I'm relatively contented with things. I just feel sometimes that I don't seem to be a conventional 20 year old student, and that I'm somehow missing out on how youth is supposed to be. Then I realise that things are fine as they are, and the reason I don't have many friends is that most people I've met at college are intensely annoying to me for a wide variety of reasons.

I know what you mean with that flat-broke thing though.

Thanks for the response, I appreciate it.

[Eos of the Eons]

Hey, that's awsome. It's funny when try to think of how things are 'supposed to be'. You're doing okay if you're not working at a gas station at your age to pay for child support and rent.

College people are annoying for several reasons. One of the main ones I've found is that they don't appreciate the fact that they are there when so many others can't be.

I had one older person (probably only a couple of years older since I was 20 in my first year college) giving me a hard time because she thought I was the usual spoiled brat college kid around 18 (cause I looked 16). She apologized to me a few months later for treating me so bad. Turns out I was the smartest one in the class, and she had judged me so wrong. Her treating me bad just made her look like an @ss, and she was trying to do damage control.

It would be interesting to hear in what ways college people are annoying now...can you relate some stories the way Sue does?

[TwoShanks]

Well I don't have any stories quite up to the standards of this thread, but generally I find that students fall into a few broad categories:

(i) The Revolutionary/Politician
This one isn't a particularly popular group, but woe betide anyone who tries a conversation with one of these people. This is the group of people who will constantly be organising rallies in support of every conceivable left-wing cause. Now, I'm a fairly liberal sort, but it's indescribably annoying to be confronted with people espousing radical socialism at every possible moment. The politicians are the people who are involved with "student elections" and newspapers, and essentially they protest against every possible thing the university does.

"There is not enough housing available for new students due to the university."

Then, when the university begins building more housing:

"The university has chosen a terrible contractor and a bad location."

In another incident, the student union and newspaper complained about lack of parking space at the university. The university then set about building a new parking area on an unused piece of field. The student union and newspaper then complained about the use of a piece of a field for car parking.

Around the time of elections for the student union positions, the campus was plastered with thousands of large posters for various candidates. My housemate and I were putting up posters advertising a room available in our house for the following year, and due to the near-infinity of posters we had to cover up parts of a few campaign posters. One of the "politician types" then began berating me for breaching "The Poster Code" and handed me a copy of said code, which it turns out prohibits covering up other posters under pain of "removing posters in breach of the code". Since the campaign posters had already done this, I didn't see it as a problem. This led to an argument. I later found out that the girl complaining to me was running unopposed for a paid elected position. I was most annoyed, then and now, with the petty beauracracy of these people.

(ii) The New Intellectual
Last year I and my housemates had several acquaintances studying subjects such as English, Spanish, History etc. Several times these girls informed us of how they are extremely "postmodern" and of how everything should be considered under "postmodernist theory". We asked them on several occasions what "postmodern" means in relation to books, language, or anything other than architecture, to be greeted by some handwaving followed by "well I can't define it, you'll have to read books about it." This is the epitomy of the New Intellectual, the group of students that picks up a few buzzwords like "postmodern" and "irony" and throws them into conversation as often as possible to sound intellectual and intelligent. These people annoy me intensely.

As an example, when asked for a definition, one of the girls said "well I can't define it, but I know it when I see it." A philosophy student that I lived with decided to test this by printing an essay made by the Postmodernism Generator and asking her what it meant. She told us that she understood it but couldn't explain it, and seemed quite flustered when we pointed out it meant nothing at all.

(iii) The Alternative Religioners
This lot are very strange. They generally fall under the banner of the Pagan Society. The people I know from this group are all heavily involved with role-playing and are part of the "furry" subculture. They spout uninformed nonsense about science all the time. One of them is actually in my physics classes, he insists on wearing a clip-on tail and ears most of the time, and constantly, constantly tries to get as much attention as possible by being loudly, flamboyantly camp and referring loudly to his "furry" exploits at all times. It's an incredibly blatant attempt at trying to "be an individual" by loudly pointing out "LOOK I DO DIFFERENT THINGS FROM YOU! I'M DIFFERENT!" all the time.

I once asked him how he reconciles the idea of magic with doing a physics degree, and he responded by saying "Science doesn't know everything." When I asked him what "magic" he had performed that had worked, his only response was "I can make myself fade into the background so I can walk around the uni at night without being noticed by people." My suggestion that this might be because there are few people around at 3am who would notice a man of average height in the dark wearing dark clothes seemed to annoy him slightly.

Then there are the standard other groups like the "SPORTS!" people, the stoners, the slackers and so on.

In short, there are very few people that don't annoy me when I talk to them, though I imagine they say the same about me.

[Eos of the Eons]

Well, if anything, you have a lot of insight. I'm sorry to hear the college pagans are making a mockery of paganism in general with their misguided actions. A tail?? That guy is a nut. I have to agree about their misunderstandings of science. I hung about a pagan forum, and made a lot of enemies defending GM foods. The buzzwords that were supposed to be scientific sounding abounded in there a lot.

The great thing about the friends you have is that they must be somewhat like you, and they are hard to find.

Thanks for the rundown on the groups, it was fun to read!

[Suezoled]

Ah TwoShanks, and here I am jealous of not being able to go to college this year! I am dying to finish my undergrad so I could go on and increase my debt through graduate school!

I also tended to avoid people on the campus. Naive and immature, I thought, or overly proud and obnoxious. So full of new ideas and no way to sort them, these people. Complaining if 4 professors give them 50 pages each to read. Kids who got all offended and silent when one professor explained, one day, that would likely all graduate, get full time jobs, marry, become parents, own property, and THEN they would know the meaning of "busy."

[Suezoled]

Phone call:
Me: How can I help you?
Her: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
*fx: beeping sound, lots of conversations in the background.*
Her: Sorry about that. I'm.... off, *huff* having a baby...
Me: Right now I take it?
Her: Yeaah.... how'd you know?
Me: Just a guess
*looks at her file*
Me: you know you're case is all set up?
Her: Yeahh... but, (hff) I was told....rrraragh! to call before the baby'sborn..
Me: No. You call AFTER the baby is born. You set up a maternity care and delivery case before hand. You deliver. You call us later.
Her: Oh, really? Ok (agh!) Sorry about that. I'll talk to you (hff) later then.
Me: Don't forget to breathe.
*click*

[Suezoled]

What is with eye doctors and their phone numbers?

Eye doctor standard phone #: 000-000-2020

Yup. 20/20. Get it?
*groans*

[Suezoled]

Some guy got 2nd and 3rd degree burns so had to go to the ER. He had tried to reproduce the scene in American Pie with an apple pie right out of the oven.
That'll teach him to molest a perfectly good pie.

[Suezoled]

person: "Hi! Do you pay for seeing eye dogs?"
Me: (I'm not feeling well. I've been sick all weekend.) "No."
person: Oh, why not?
Me: Because we're a health insurance company
Person: exactly. This dog would be for health
Me: Unless you're planning to inject that dog under the owner's skin, there's no benefit for us to pay for it. In fact, we woudn't pay anyway.
Person: Oh. Okay. Well, it doesn't hurt to try.
*click*
*I am fervently wishing I COULD reach out and strangle someone through the phone lines....*

[Dragonrock]

I get a call from a customer, their power failed for a second and several of the servers are rebooting. We have modems set up with all of our customers so we can connect and help maintain the servers but in this case the power surge scrambled their router. I was unable to get connected and thus would have to talk this person through a large number of complicated commands.

I can do this in fifteen minutes if I have access, it's taken over two hours to talk someone through it. 20 minutes later I hung up with a pleasant and satisfied customer who listened to everything I said and typed it right on the first try. Some coworkers overheard my call and commented that she got it all very quickly.

It's been a good day.

[Melissa Johnson]

I work for a small manufacturing company in a large industrial park. Recently, we've had a very large company with lots of employees move into the space next door for a period of three months (they'll be moving soon). We have been in this office since 96. We have three people who work in our office; we need three parking spots. Do you think we can get three parking spots? The spots aren't marked, of course. We've courteously asked that the three spots adjacent to our office be kept free, as there are only three of us and it gets rather annoying to have to park in a lot not even near our building. Do you know what we get in response? "Don't see your name on it [parking slot], huh huh." Slots are regularly jammed with gigantic diesel trucks if we don't get there first.

Now. Okay then. I get that we don't have designated parking. I get it. Truly. But when you go and make a polite request (and you've been a senior occupant of said building) and get ABSOLUTELY NO REGARD in response...and no place to park...it tends to make the blood pressure rise. Just a little. Over parking.

[Suezoled]

Her: Um, you know that, like, herbal medicine Pamela Anderson is taking for her hep C?
Me:......yes
Her: I want to try that. I have it. Will you pay for it?
Me:......no
Her: Why not?
Me: my company would rather spend its money on known therapies that work for things such a Hepatitis C. Pamela Anerson's herbal formula is going to end up doing her no good.
Her: How do you know it's not good?
Me: think about it. If it really worked, the drug companies would have made a patent on it already, and the only way you could get it is through my company.
Her: oh. yeah.... okay. But I still want to try it.
Me: you have to pay for it yourself then.
Her: you guys won't cover it?
Me: no.
Her: well that sucks!

*click*

*actually, I never would have known about Pam Anderson until I saw it on JREF...hee!*

[Suezoled]

Chiropractor call:
Her: Hi. We need some more visits granted to see this patient.
Me: (flinch at the sound of ducks quacking) (look at file) this patient has already had 30 visits
Her: Yes, she needs more
Me: This patient only has 30 visits granted to her for chiro visits per calender year.
Her: but it's medically necessary
Me: (beginning to love this, I admit) contract benefits are absolute. If the benefits are exhausted, there are no more sessions the case managers will grant. Even if they do grant them, their authorization does not override the patient's contract, and all visits are non-payable.
Her: But it's MEDICALLY NECESSARY to see this patient.
Me: If it's a medical necessity, perhaps the patient should see a medical doctor. Those visits are still coverable. But chiros are exhausted.
Her: So even if we see her and submit the bill it dont' be paid for.
Me: you got it.
Her: but we've already seen her 37 times!
Me: I cannot set up cases for services already rendered. Those 7 wouldn't be paid for anyway.
Her: So what are we gonna do with those 7 visits?
Me: You can bill the patient or write it off as charity
Her: I don't think so! That patient's gonna get a bill!
Me: okay.

[Zep]

Originally posted by Melissa Johnson
I work for a small manufacturing company in a large industrial park. Recently, we've had a very large company with lots of employees move into the space next door for a period of three months (they'll be moving soon). We have been in this office since 96. We have three people who work in our office; we need three parking spots. Do you think we can get three parking spots? The spots aren't marked, of course. We've courteously asked that the three spots adjacent to our office be kept free, as there are only three of us and it gets rather annoying to have to park in a lot not even near our building. Do you know what we get in response? "Don't see your name on it [parking slot], huh huh." Slots are regularly jammed with gigantic diesel trucks if we don't get there first.

Now. Okay then. I get that we don't have designated parking. I get it. Truly. But when you go and make a polite request (and you've been a senior occupant of said building) and get ABSOLUTELY NO REGARD in response...and no place to park...it tends to make the blood pressure rise. Just a little. Over parking. Option 1: Park behind them after they are there. Or better still, close enough to make it damn near impossible for the trucks to be gotten out without hitting somebody's car. Their choice: Hit something and get a hefty repair bill sent to their company, wait until you go (late at night is good!), or park somewhere else.

Option 2: Have the parking spots designated for Handicapped or Doctors Only Parking, get appropriate sticker yourself, have local parking dudes enforce rules with fines.

In fact, any option that costs their company money usually works.

[Melissa Johnson]

Originally posted by Zep
Option 1: Park behind them after they are there. Or better still, close enough to make it damn near impossible for the trucks to be gotten out without hitting somebody's car. Their choice: Hit something and get a hefty repair bill sent to their company, wait until you go (late at night is good!), or park somewhere else.

Option 2: Have the parking spots designated for Handicapped or Doctors Only Parking, get appropriate sticker yourself, have local parking dudes enforce rules with fines.

In fact, any option that costs their company money usually works.

Huh. Apparently dirty looks and a couple of up-turned buckets in the said parking slots does the trick.

However the next time...I'm getting a can of spray paint :mad:

[Eos of the Eons]

Hey Melissa, can you guys put up signs that say "for this business's employees only" on 3 spaces? Tack on "Any violators will have vehicles towed".

I parked behind a bank once. There were signs that said "Parking for CIBC Bank only". They failed to put on "employees only", so go figure-I mistake it to mean CIBC customers could park there. Those hags did park behind my car and called a tow truck. I had kicked the tire of the car parked behind mine.

The hags yelled at me for being a bad example to my son for kicking the car tire.

So I yelled back "Where the hell does it say on that sign "Employees Only"?? Nowhere!!"

The tow truck driver kinda scratched his head. I had a point for gosh sakes! My car didn't get towed. I never went to a CIBC bank again.

Just something to keep in mind :D

[Zep]

Actually, Melissa and Eos, I was having a BAD day in the traffic the other day just before I wrote that, so I should have put lots of winking smilies on it...

You can ask Roadtoad - many truck-drivers are pretty nice people, so a quiet and friendly word with them will probably solve everything happily.

[Eos of the Eons]

Originally posted by Zep
Actually, Melissa and Eos, I was having a BAD day in the traffic the other day just before I wrote that, so I should have put lots of winking smilies on it...

You can ask Roadtoad - many truck-drivers are pretty nice people, so a quiet and friendly word with them will probably solve everything happily.

Yeah, but tow trucks and blocking cars in are ever so much more stimulating:D I don't think I ever yelled at anyone like that before in my life! Let's see what truck drivers are made of-heh :)

[Zep]

OUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK...

(FYI for overseas readers, Australia's largest telco, Telstra, is government-owned, so their employees are "public servants" with brain to match)

One of our company sites is pretty remote - down the NSW coast - and all telecoms is via a single cable run for much of the way. We noticed the other morning that the office had disappeared from the network. Shortly afterwards the staff called from another location - where did all their phones and network go???

Call to Telstra Fault Reporting:

Us: Hello, the ADSL network to XXX is down. Anyone looking at it?
Telstra: Oh yeah, they're upgrading the network cable in that area.
Us: When was that planned for?
Telstra: 10:00am today.
Us: Aren't you supposed to warn the customers first??!
Telstra: Yeah, we tried to phone them at 10:30 but couldn't get through. We're sending someone out to look for the break in the phone line now...

[Melissa Johnson]

Originally posted by Eos of the Eons


Yeah, but tow trucks and blocking cars in are ever so much more stimulating:D I don't think I ever yelled at anyone like that before in my life! Let's see what truck drivers are made of-heh :)

Eos, I agree--I don't have a leg to stand on without having the parking designated. However, this wasn't so much a question of customers parking in our spots, though, as both of our offices are not retail locations--the other office knew we needed the spaces.

That said, the word's gotten out and people seem to be remembering were our parking spots are. Which is good. I hate to have to argue over something like this, unless I'm having a PMS attack,(as I was the other day, in which--as you said--it's just more fun to scream and throw fits)...

[Suezoled]

Is this a new trend, or is it me? eveyrone seems to think their kids are special and gifted. Maybe not psychically so, but I have so many cases for kids who are between 6 months and 3 years for speech therapy. I'm very sure many cases are legit, but I end up wondering about parents who have doctors write out scripts for kids are 6 months who are not talking yet.

[Suezoled]

And then there's the classic:
Me: Hello (yadda yadda)
caller: I think I'm having a heart attack. Can I go to the emergency room?
Me: *head explosion* YES! GO NOW! WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH INSURANCE IF YOU LIFE IS IN DANGER?!
Caller: I just want to make sure this is going to get paid for

[iankaplan]

Yesterday I was giving a weekly guitar lesson to a nine-year-old girl, and she was dealing with the pain in her left hand fingertips by dipping her fingers in a bowl of cold feta cheese, then squeezing her thumb toward her fingers and sucking the resultant glob into her mouth. Then she would wipe her hand on her skirt. I think she's adorable and a fun student, so I didn't mind. However, at the end of the lesson, she called her mom in so mom could hear us play "There She Goes" together. After the girl did her cheese trick, I made a joke about how that skirt might need to be laundered, like, immediately after I leave.

Anyway, mom must have been a bit embarrassed, because 10 minutes after I left, my cell phone rang. It was the nine-year-old, calling to apologize for eating cheese in a rude manner. I was like "That's okay sweetie, I didn't mind. Don't worry about it."

It was so cute.

[Zep]

Originally posted by Suezoled
And then there's the classic:
Me: Hello (yadda yadda)
caller: I think I'm having a heart attack. Can I go to the emergency room?
Me: *head explosion* YES! GO NOW! WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH INSURANCE IF YOU LIFE IS IN DANGER?!
Caller: I just want to make sure this is going to get paid for I wonder... What would she do if you had said "No, it isn't covered"? Stop having the heart attack?

[Suezoled]

Originally posted by Zep
I wonder... What would she do if you had said "No, it isn't covered"? Stop having the heart attack?

I've been sooo sorely tempted to say "no you can't it's not covered" but I just havent' been able to lie about it yet.

[Zep]

I can imagine how it might go:

Her: I think I'm having a heart attack. Can I go to the emergency room?

You: Nope. You're not covered for that.

Her: WHAAATT!! Oh God!!! Wadda ya mean I'm not covered!! {sound of collapsing} AAARRGH!

You: No no, just kidding! Of course you are covered for it. Off you go! {ditzy voice} Have a nice day and thank you for calling .... {click}

[Chanileslie]

Originally posted by Suezoled
Mine isn't half done yet!

I already got a case on a woman who hacked off her own finger in the kitchen (she described how she wrapped it in a clear plastic baggie and took it to the hospital.

Another guy called, furious because (ahem) he was seeing a quack about a quack medication and wanted the insurance company to pay so that he could keep being quacked (my words, of course, not his). He wanted to see an allergist who is the only allergist in the world who makes in his allergist lab a nasal spray formula that is individual and unique to him and no lab or pharmacy or drug company makes a spray like it and he has special needs so my company needs to pay for it. (deep breath for air!)

Another person who wants to send her 6 year old to a chiropractors because she doesn't want to put chemicals in his body.

A person who "needs" general anesthesia so that she could get an ingrown tonail removed. Local anesthesia is not good enough for her.

I mean, not a bad earthshattering day, but this is wearing me out and it's not even noon here... :(

Ah, you must work in the health insurance industry. I work in the industrial insurance industry, and it is very frustrating at times. Especially when I have the 80 year old woman who had a hurt shoulder that has had surgery with poor results once, who wants surgery again. I am sorry, but according to all the guidelines we use, she is not going to have a good result. Or the 60 year old guy who insists that a fusion will completely fix him, and who had story after story about the "friend who had a fusion, and 3 weeks later was riding horses". It isn't going to happen!! Or the 30 some year old guy who had absolutely nothing wrong with him, but insisted that he was unable to work because of the pain, and he was sure his spine "was out of line", but none of his multitude of x-rays, MRI's or physicians that examined him showed this to be the case.......Um, okay, I am done now. :-)

But it is things like that that just make me so cynical.

[Suezoled]

OH yes! And let's talk about the callers who insist, INSIST on spelling every dang thing they talk about.

Caller: I've got mr Grunchiverocshif Scheruinmiyamatushinossy- Moerkenininsefer who's been admitted. That's "G" like goat, "R" like run, "U" like umbrella, "H" like harry.... oh, wait. I messed up. Let me start agin. That's "G" like goat......
Me: *I've pretty much bludgeoned myself to death on my coffee cup at this point.*
*5 hours later*
Caller: He lives on Smithenfoffer lane. That's "S" like sam, "M" like michael...
*2 hours later*
Caller: He's got syncopy and he's an emergency admission. That's "S" like sam, "Y" like yo-yo, "N" like nancy....
*it's even better when it's not even my contract to handle*
Caller: And we're at St. John the Runnynoser hospital. That's "S" like sam....
Me: *looking up ways to commit seppuku with plastic spoon*
*6 hours later....*
Caller: Oh! Wait! It's not Mr Grunchiverocshif, it's his wife Grumereldinasiasophorejepekik who's the the patient. That's "G" like goat, "R" like run, "U" like umbrella....



***no Grunchiverocshif Scheruinmiyamatushinossy- Moerkenininsefer nor Grumereldinasiasophorejepekik was harmed in the making of this rant***

[Suezoled]

Caller: My son is dying! I had to send him to the hospital! I paid the bill myself! I need to get reimbursed!
Me: You name please
Caller: Bob X from *******
Me: Your son's name
Caller: Kyle
Me: Your id number please
Caller: **********
Me: Um, you said your son?
Caller: Yes! Kyle is my son.
Me: You sure about that? Kyle being your son and all?
Caller: yes.
Me: cuz' I have here Kyle is a GIRL

*click*

Don't you hate it when you can't tell if your kid is a boy or girl?

[Suezoled]

caller: wish me luck. I'm getting married on Friday.
Me: oh. Good luck. Are you sure about this?
caller: well, she's never made me feel this way about anyone. But I'm not sure. And everyone else is getting married, so I figure why not?
Me: so you're telling me you're getting married because you feel like you should and not like you want to? Are you nuts? This is the rest of your life you're talking about.
caller: oh. well. If it sucks I can just get a divorce
Me: so you have a prenuptual agreement
caller: um, no
Me: and you're getting married
caller: um, yeah....
Me: you, sir, are in more trouble than you realize.

End of call

[Suezoled]

Me: Hi. How can I help you?
Caller: Now you listen here. I've been on this phone for 45 minutes trying to get to someone to leave information for this patient.
Me: You're calling from the hospital right? *checks caller id... verifies patient has been on the phone for 3 minutes, 45 seconds)
Caller: YES. Now, you find me a case manager and you give me her name and number.
Me: Patient's name please.
Caller. WHAT?? I don't have time for this! You get me a case manager right now!
Me: Patien'ts name please.
Caller: Now you listen here-
Me: look, I can't find the case manager on duty for this person until I verify I have the right person
Caller: *several seconds of angry, deep breathing* Mary X. Her name is Mary X
Me: okay. Her date of birth?
Caller: WHAT?

(repeat scenario asking for date of birth, address, home phone number, and patient's work phone number. )
Me: oh, well, I see here on the patient's case she's approved for 13 days. She doesn't need any information.
Caller: *slams down phone*
Me: Have a nice day....

[bug_girl]

oh wow, there are so many things going on in this thread that push buttons for me.

College students: in the 15 years i've been teaching, every year they get ruder, more aggressive, and more passive. Students yell at me, call me a bitch, and generally have no sense of personal responsibility.
The good students who are paying their way, (who are becoming rarer, as funding and budgets get cut) are just struggling to make tuition. I wish i had the $$ to help.
It seems like the change is related to changes in parenting--so many of these kids have a service mentality--deliver it to me now. I feel sad for them, because when they graduate they are totally unprepared for the real world. US Universities educate you about content, but not life.

Insurance: Right now my 30 yr old sister is looking at a double masectomy for breast cancer. The drug that could save her (designed specifically for her tumor) is only approved for people in stage III cancer, and she's in stage II. So, no drug. The drug to stop her chemo anemia isn't covered until she's sick enough to need a transfusion. The transfusion isn't covered, BTW. Her tumor is considered too aggressive for her to participate in clinical trials and get free drugs.
So, while there are an insane amount of very, very, stupid people, some of us are trying to get coverage for legit reasons.
Just had to vent that:(

[Suezoled]

Originally posted by bug_girl
oh wow, there are so many things going on in this thread that push buttons for me

Insurance: Right now my 30 yr old sister is looking at a double masectomy for breast cancer. The drug that could save her (designed specifically for her tumor) is only approved for people in stage III cancer, and she's in stage II. So, no drug. The drug to stop her chemo anemia isn't covered until she's sick enough to need a transfusion. The transfusion isn't covered, BTW. Her tumor is considered too aggressive for her to participate in clinical trials and get free drugs.
So, while there are an insane amount of very, very, stupid people, some of us are trying to get coverage for legit reasons.
Just had to vent that:(

Has she appealed to the medical director? That might help a bit.

[Suezoled]

caller: um... hi... um... I'm pregnant
Me: Yes? Do you want a case set up?
caller: um... well.... what did you say?
Me: Do you want a case set up?
caller: well, yeah. I guess. If i need one. Do I need one?
Me: eventually yes.
caller: oh. okay....
*silence*
caller: um, I'm pregnant.
Me: yes. You told me that. What's your name?
caller: uuummmmm.... I'm sorry. what was the question?
Me: what-is-your-name?
caller: Oh. Mary X
Me: When is your edc?
caller: um....what? what's that? I don't know what that is.
Me: when are you due to deliver?
caller: oh. Um. on the 12th.
Me: of this month?
caller: oh! No! in February.
Me: who's your doctor?
caller: ummm....I'm expecting twins.
Me: who is your doctor?
caller: Um... what?
Me: you DOCTOR...
caller: huh?
Me: WHO is your DOCTOR?
caller: oh. doctor so-n-so
Me: what hospital will you go to?
caller: X hospital
Me: you sure about that?
caller: yeah. we're really excited. <----(assume she's talking about spouse?)
Me: okay, you case has been set up and approved. We need a call within 48 hours after the babies are born to make sure you're all doing well.
caller: um... huh? Oh. Call back in 24 hours....
Me: no, 48 hours.
caller: oh. ummm.... forty-eight hours.....call back....
Me: okay. bye now!
caller: UMMmmmm.....
Me:......
caller:.......um, okay. bye.

*at this time, I think I've worn out my pair of plyers trying to yank teeth from this woman*

[UnrepentantSinner]

If the woman's phone manners are any indication of her mothering skills, I only hope her next contact with you is to get her tubes tied.

Husband: Honey, the babies are crying.
Mary X: Huh... what?
Husband: I think they're hungry.
Mary X: I need to buy diapers tomorrow.
Husband: What? Honey the kids need feeding.
Mary X: Umm... what?
Husband: Breast milk, otherwise they'll starve.
Mary X: Umm... I wasn't aware of that.

Why do I have visions of a pair of wards of the state in the future...

[bug_girl]

i was so busy ranting, i forgot to tell you student stories!

Me: Hello?
Student: Yeah, i wanted to know what building the virtual career fair was in?

(wait--there's more!)

Me: It's not in a building. it's virtual. it's only online.
Student: Yeah, but where?
Me: You have to log onto your computer to participate. Hence the name, *Virtual* Career Fair.
Student: (getting louder) Look lady, i know what it's called, but where is it on campus? What building? I need to know so i know if i need to get off work early and find parking.
Me: Why don't you visit the Career Center and get a map from them?

(Thus cleverly dumping the problem on someone else--assuming the kid could find the career center.)

[Suezoled]

Case: ER admit to hospital. Diagnosis: trauma from gunshot wound to head. Dr: Lincoln. Patient's name: Jon Booth.

Wow! The religious, social, psychic, angelic, satanistic, etc implications are wild!

[Suezoled]

Caller: this doctor refuses to accept your insurance policy! Can you make him accept it?
Me: No.
Caller: Why not?
Me: We can't force a doctor to see anyone, just like we can't force you to see a doctor if you don't want to see
Caller: but I'm a paying customer!
Me: If the doctor doesn't accept your policy, yes, you will be paying as a customer.
Caller: But.... but can't you call the police or something?
Me: *sigh* look, we can't as a company force the doctor to see you, it's not illegal for him to refuse you, and would you really want to see a doctor to diagnose you at all if he were hostile because he's forced to see you?
Caller: why would he be hostile?
Me:.........

[Suezoled]

Caller: Hi. I've got a hamster stuck up my *ss. Can you get it out? (much laughing in background as guy says this).
Me: You're kidding, right?
Caller: No, um..no (more laughing)
Me: Just use your butt muscles like you're have a bowel movement. You put petroleum jelly on the hamster before shoving it in you, right?
Caller: (not laughing anymore) um, yeah.
Me: Just flex and shoot out.
Caller: Oh, um, okay.
Me: (look at caller id) and if this is a joke, like I suspect it is, once I've found out where you're calling from, you can expect a visit from your local friendly police officer. Have a nice day.

[Eos of the Eons]

:wow2:


:eek: :eek: :eek:

:dl:

[Suezoled]

Call right now: Hi... I'm Susan. I signed up with your company for chiropractic. But then I fell... and the doctor isn't in your network. And I fell. And the chiropractor told me to get an MRI and I have bulging discs in my back. The doctor told me he could ease the discs back in. But he's not in network. And I'm sick. And when you're not sick you don't have energy to fight the insurance company and you have to concentrate and focus on your whole body and health. But since my fall I'm not able to and I really need to see this chiropractor. But it's a whole body issue not just my back and this chiropractor isn't in your network. But he can ease the discs back into my back. And my medical doctor told me to do this.

(at this point I think my own spine is ripping itself out of my back screaming "wooo!")

(waaahhhh! More "spinal manipulation" for the masses!)

[Eos of the Eons]

I'm shaking my head on that one.

I have something. Not funny, but certainly a how was your day to note.

At my husband's work (grocery store) an older lady that all the staff knew came in and one of the staff talked to her and went to get her something. While she was walking away the lady fell, with a big thud.

There was blood...but she'd had a heart attack, and died right there in the store. The medics that came with the ambulance a few minutes later couldn't revive her. They tried really hard to.

That happened today. All of the staff are quite upset about it.

I'm quite moved by the whole thing. You just never know when something like that will happen.

[Suezoled]

Oh Eos, I hope your husband is taking care himself. How sad. :(

[Eos of the Eons]

Thank you Suezoled, He's lucky to not have to work until Tuesday, and he wasn't as affected as the girls who were helping her at the time. It's just a sad time for that to happen. Keeps a person humble, and we appreciate the life lessons.

[Frankie]

My day so far today has been fine. I have moved more packing cases to yet another room. My paint has now dried and I can put my bedroom in order at last. The carpet layers have now finished off both my bacon sandwiches and coffee and laying my carpets. Oh the sheer joy tonight to be able to sleep in bed and not on the sofa again.

Now I am off to some shopping center called foss to pick up some household times and some food to stock up my recently delivered fridgefreezer.

Such joy shopping on a Saturday.

[Graham]

Sorry, no humorous anecdotes to relate . .

My granny died this morning :(

She was 87 and had been going 'downhill' for a long time so it wasn't entirely unexpected.

She lived about 230 miles north of here in a little house on a hill, looking down over Lough Foyle that was a second home to me for a very long time.

The rest of my family are travelling up today for the removal but I have decided to stay with the kids for Christmas and go up for the funeral on Friday.

To be honest, I'm not really the emotional type but it's not easy keeping up the Christmas cheer.

Graham


http://www.dun-na-ngall.com/foyle.jpg

[Suezoled]

Oh Graham. I'm so sorry. please take care....:(

[Chaos]

Same from me.

:rub:

Have a nice (probably not Merry, I guess) Christmas nonetheless. Remember, she lives on in your memories. As long as any of you still remember her, she is not really gone.

[Suezoled]

....grr... yet another STUPID mother asking if she can take her son to the Emergency Room! STUPID STUPID STUPID! If your son has a 104 degree F fever, WHY are you asking ME?????

[Flame]

Originally posted by Suezoled
Is this a new trend, or is it me? eveyrone seems to think their kids are special and gifted. Maybe not psychically so, but I have so many cases for kids who are between 6 months and 3 years for speech therapy. I'm very sure many cases are legit, but I end up wondering about parents who have doctors write out scripts for kids are 6 months who are not talking yet.


Hi Sue

Our son Nick has been under the care of a speech & language therapist since he was born. They don't only deal with speech in itself, but the mechanisms of speech and the possible future problems physically. It is vital that these things are diagnosed as early as possible so that therapy can be done, or so that sign language or other needed intervention can be done.
Children with Down's syndrome, or cleft palate and I'm sure many other issues they are born with need diagnoses of future impediments to do with speech right away so that these things can be headed off if possible.
Many speech therapists can help with low muscle tone in the mouth and excersises to deal with the issue that will cause the problem with speech development.

Just so you know that it may not be a scam ;)

Toni

[Suezoled]

Me: Hello (yadda yadda)
Guy: Hi. My name is Bob PPPP. I hurt me knee
Me: Okay...
Guy: well I hurt my knee and I need an xray. At a hospital
Me: Okay...
Guy: I hurt my knee. Can I go to a hopsital
Me: yes, you don't even need to contact me. You can just go to the hosptal
Guy: But I hurt my knee. I can't go to work today. My knee is sore.
Me: (wishing fervently for a drink at 8:38am)
Guy: So I need permission to have my knee checked. Because I hurt it. It's my left one...
Me: (wondering if swallowing a handful of pennies will get me out of work for a day)
Guy: ....since I hurt me left knee I need to have an x ray.
Me: So... you hurt your left knee?
Guy: yes. My left one.
Me: You sure it's you're left one.
Guy: yep. My knee.
Me: and you said you hurt your left knee?
Guy: Yes ma'am. I hurt my left knee.
Me: Did you say your LEFT knee?
Guy: yes ma'am.
Me: Oh. well you don't need to talk to me. Go get your x ray done.
Guy: Oh. Okay
Me: You said it was your left one, right?

End call

[roger]

Wow, it's lucky that guy has insurance for his left knee. Most people who don't know any better only insure their right knee.

[Suezoled]

Me: hello (etc)
Caller: I have information for a case
Me: okay
Caller: okay, patient was in for detoxication for alcohol at 7am on Dec. 30, 2003.
Me: (typing)
Caller: I guess he was starting New Year's early I guess
Me: (typing)
Caller: My son died
Me: (stop typing) what?
Caller: my son died of alcohol poisoning. And my dad died. He was 60 and he had a problem and when my mom died he just couldn't live without her. So he drank every night and it killed him.
Me:.....
Caller: people just don't realize and it was so hard to lose my dad but he just couldn't live without Mom. And when my son died
Me: that's terrible.
Caller: and these people overdrink for FUN
Me: um, right.
Caller: Oh, and... (goes back to narrating case)

[Suezoled]

Me: hello (you know the routine by now)
Caller: Hi. We need to set up wound care at home in the patient's residence. At home.
Me: (counts redunancies)
Me: So, when is this scheduled to begin?
Caller: well, the patient went to the hospital on Dec. 20 for a wound that didn't heal and he's been having abcesses on his leg and stomach. We need to set up a home care program for him so we can take care of his wound at home. He is supposed to go home on Dec. 31, 2003, and we need to see him Dec. 31, 2003.
Me: (ripping keys off keyboard in sheer frustration)
Me: .....
Me:....
Caller: ....
Me: so he has to start the program today.
Caller: yes
Me: okay.
Me: okay, who is the ordering doctor?
Caller: oh honey. I can't hardly read this paperwork. Do you really need that?
Me: yes.
Caller: oh.
Caller:.....
Me:....
Caller:....
Me: .....
Caller: Dr VVVV
Me: what is the doctor's phone number?
Caller: what's that honey?
Me: what is the doc's phone #?
Caller: I'm sorry...what's that
Me: (wishing she would turn the d@mn music down on her end) Doctor's phone #
caller: oh. Okay. 000-000-0000
Me: Your case number is 9999999999
Caller: that's 99989999989?
Me: No, it's 9999999999
Caller: 99989999989?
Me: NO. It's 9999999999
Caller: Oh. okay.
Caller: I need to know how much we'll be paid for this
Me: you're contracted to pay at the network rate you agreed to be paid for when you signed up
Caller: but what rate is that?
Me: [head explosion... so sick of this person] I don't know. Want me to send you to customer services?
Caller: Naw honey. That's ain't important.

[Suezoled]

Don't. Ever. Call. Me. And. ASK if you can go to the Emergency room in these scenarios:

1.) Your 5 year old kid has a 105.5F fever.

2.) You think you're suffering a miscarriage

3.) You broke your head open, there's blood all over, and you think you can SEE YOUR BRAIN if you tilt your head just so

4.) You spit up "something" and it "don't look good."

[volant]

Originally posted by Suezoled
Don't. Ever. Call. Me. And. ASK if you can go to the Emergency room in these scenarios:

1.) Your 5 year old kid has a 105.5F fever.

2.) You think you're suffering a miscarriage

3.) You broke your head open, there's blood all over, and you think you can SEE YOUR BRAIN if you tilt your head just so

4.) You spit up "something" and it "don't look good." Then who can I call? :confused: :p

Morning: Another few inches of snow on the ground, I had to shovel it. Oh yeah, it was lots of fun. After that I had to walk to my doctor appointment, in this freezing weather. Again, high fun.
Afternoon: Got lines for the commercial I will be doing, practiced them with my voice coach. Recieved the outfit I will wearing, cowboy, very cowboy... Started the artwork for my album, I have 3 months to complete this, no worries. :)
Night: Found out I have a job interview on Monday, and its pretty early in the morning. Yay! :)

Overall, good. :D

[Eos of the Eons]

***does happy dance for Volant***:D


Good to hear. We have rain of all things right now. Rain in July. It is above zero. We therefore have tons of ice.

I don't remember the last time I saw rain in july.

Funny thing is, the people in the east of Canada are in an outrageously cold deep freeze.


A country of extremes.

[Suezoled]

Call today:
Caller: I had a baby
(caller is a guy)
Me: okay...
Caller: how do I feed him?
Me:.... what?
Caller: you F*$&-ing heard me. What are ya, retarded? How do I feed this f*&$-ing thing?
Me: you just had a baby.
Caller: yeah. My wife's in the hospital though. Oh, and I need to know how to change a diaper. And how long it should sleep for. And what it means when it cries. And when it should wear a blanket.
Me: The baby isn't nursing? How long has he or she been out of the hospital?
Caller: 1 day. I dunno nothin bout this crap.
Me: I see.... hold on one moment.
Caller: look lady, all I need to know is how to feed this kid. And what temperature to warm the formula at. And how to change its diaper. and does the baby go on its back when I put it down to sleep?
[puts caller on hold]
Me: [contacting baby specialty nurses] [speaking to nurse] Do I have a case for you....

[Suezoled]

Caller: I um, need a surgery
Me: okay, what do you need?
Caller: Total abdominal hysterectomy...or something
Me: or something?
caller: yeah...
Me: Oh. Kay. What is your diagnosis?
Caller: I don't know
Me: You don't know?
Caller: No I don't know
Me: You don't know why you need your uterus out?
Caller: ...no.

I told her to have her doctor call us.

[hawkins_anderson]

just another day on the job. nothing a strong cup of coffee couldn't cure. that and a ride on my motorcycle next warm day out of this frozen wasteland. lol. my best.

[Ladyhawk]

It's about 13 degrees here today and windy. It's been like this for weeks. I'm tired of it. I'm cold. I have to go to a client in DC next week and work with them all week. This is irritating because I manage a training department but I still have to do gigs because my company doesn't want to hire in this economy. It's actually within 30 - 40 degrees in DC. It's gonna be like a vacation for me.

I gained 8 lbs over the holidays and am now working out twice as much and eating half as much to set the scales right. So, I'm hungry.

I've been pounding on this laptop in the wee hours of the night, trying to prep for this gig and being bombarded with IMs and emails and calls on my cell from folks who "just need a minute" of my time. So, I'm tired.

Cold, hungry and tired.

Other than that, Life Is Good!

:)

[Kevin_Lowe]

My sweetie and I spent most of the day wrestling with TV antennas and coaxial cable, and it was not the first day spent wrestling with these damn things.

We have fiddled around with three different antennae, two different TV signal sources, three different lengths of coax, three antenna mounting points, and a disturbing number of amplifiers and other widgetry sent by my sweetie's father. We have climbed up long ladders to carefully adjust the direction of the antennae with one hand while holding a mobile phone in the other, so that we could get the angle exactly right. This afternoon we accidentally discovered that the best signal of all was achieved by plugging a cable into the back of the TV and touching the core of the other end of the cable with a particular screwdriver.

Plugging the cable into the wall and thus into an antenna produced a worse picture. Touching the core of the cable with other screwdrivers produced a tolerable but distinctly inferior picture. It was the Magic Screwdriver. It was at about this point that I started losing faith in the laws of physics.

The second best signal was achieved by fiddling around with an ancient and very low-tech set of bunny-ear antennae. That's what we're using now.

(Hmm. Now I think about it, maybe the wall socket is stuffed. It's about the one connection or piece of kit that I haven't personally taken apart and peered at. I don't dare bring the topic up for a few days though, because my sweetie has absolutely had it with TV fiddling for the moment).

[Suezoled]

Case of the day:

Caller: Um... well... I need to set up a maternity case for my daughter.
Me: [looks up number]
Me: [jaw hits ground]
Me: um, how old is your daughter?
Caller: She's 11. No. wait. She's 12.
Me: and she's pregnant...
Caller: Yup. this is her second one.
Me:.....
Caller: Yup.
Me:... um... right. How many weeks is she?
Caller: Um... I dunno.
Me: What is your daughter's date of birth?
Caller: um....
Me: let-me-talk-to-the-receptionist
Receptionist: Hello honey. what do you need?
Me: [asks info]
Receptionist: sure honey. She was born on x/x/xx and she's 8 weeks pregnant. [drops voice] They're Catholic honey. They don't believe in birth control or anything. This is her second pregnancy. 12 years old. Imagine!
Me: [finish with case] Yeah....

[Eos of the Eons]

:eek:

How catholic is the kid when she's getting pregnant already!

Talk about hypocrites who bury their heads in the sand. I mean, the religion isn't keeping the kid from being "naughty", so what good is sticking to the "no birth control" credo. So, she has a kid already and she didn't learn from that?

Man, the grandparents are going to be busy taking care of all of their child's children. Yeesh.

[volant]

^Oy!

Yesterday morning: Woke up, sick. Came up with new chord progression for song.
Yesterday afternoon: Slept, that felt really good. :D
Last night: Had to work a night shift, fun. I fell asleep during the break, damn was I tired.
This morning: Got home, now sitting at computer, having writer's block. If I go to sleep now, I can get 6 hours of sleep...

Have a good day! :)

[hawkins_anderson]

How was my day? It sucked to put it plainly. Too many people making too much noise never shutting up and aggravating the hell out of me. Woke up late but luckily made it to work on time somehow. NO COFFEE! NO FOOD! NO NEWSPAPER in the morning. I mean, what the hell? Why is it that people have to floss their teeth while driving? Is it it just me or is there something seriously wrong with that? It's just nasty. NASTY I say -naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasty. LOL. The worst is when you're sitting on the highway. All traffic flow ceases to exist and you dare to look around at the sights - people who pick their noses and think that no one else in the possible known universe would ever actually "see" them doing that. LOL. Disgusting, I tell you!

[Suezoled]

-I get one caller who is convinced she has hard metal shavings implanted in her bloodstream. Her chiropractor and her shamaness (???) told her to get chelation therapy.

-I get one caller who tells me a patient is comatose so I set up a case... and whoops honey! nevermind... the patient is already dead.

- One person who insists his doctor told him to swim for cardiac health... he wants my company to pay for his YMCA membership

-someone else is expecting us to pay for a sign language interpretor, as patient is deaf.

[Suezoled]

Things doctors have prescribed to patients the past week or so:

1.) vaginal dilators
2.) penis pumps (hand ones)
3.) underwear with velcro flap for "easy access" around crotch area (this is meant for those who have catheters, but the catalogue says it's also okay for sex, too)
4.) electric hand-held stimulation device (other)

[Eos of the Eons]

Originally posted by Suezoled
Things doctors have prescribed to patients the past week or so:

1.) vaginal dilators
2.) penis pumps (hand ones)
3.) underwear with velcro flap for "easy access" around crotch area (this is meant for those who have catheters, but the catalogue says it's also okay for sex, too)
4.) electric hand-held stimulation device (other)
Sex therapy is gaining more ground hey? :D

[Chaos]

Originally posted by Eos of the Eons

Sex therapy is gaining more ground hey? :D

Looks like a good time to be ill.

[Suezoled]

Caller: I need to set up an eye surgery
Me: Left or the right eye?
Caller: no, the other eye.

[Flame]

Well, today has been long.

This day has been tiring, taxing, frustrating, great, not-so-great, and confusing.

*OOps - Just had to stop typing to put a backpack on my 1 year old who doesn't think it's fair that all the other kids get to wear one.*

The thing about my days is that every one is nearly the same...

...and they're all so filled with madness that you would think it's exciting and refreshing, but it's not.

Some days it takes a lot of effort to remember that I am fortunate and have a great life -

I do have a great life though :) <----- Very tired smile.

Toni

[Eos of the Eons]

Originally posted by Chaos


Looks like a good time to be ill.

ROFLMAO!!

Well, I guess if sex therapy was used to treat the flu then...

LOL!!!

But alas, you have to have erectile dysfunction or something :p

[TheBoyPaj]

A visitor to my workplace parked in my space. It's a really cramped car park and we all have allocated spaces. I parked behind him and blocked him in, just so I could see who it was.

Later on, said visitor came storming into the building.

Him: "Who the hell has blocked me in??"
Me: "Ah, that would be me. I'll move it straight away" (damn reasonable of me, I think)
Him: "How bloody irresponsible. I might have had to leave in a hurry!"
Me: "Um.. it was my spot you were in."
Him: "So why did you block me in?"
Me: "So I could see who it was who took my spot. I'll move it now."
Him: "You shouldn't block people in!"
Me: "You shouldn't park in designated spaces"
Him: "You could have parked somewhere else!"
Me: "Where do you suggest?"
Him: "In an aisle, or on the street"
Me: "Then that is where YOU should have parked".
Him: "Don't block people in!"
Me: "Don't park in my space" ...

etc etc all the way down to the car park.

What fun.

[Suezoled]

Snippets at work with clients, etc,

"did you see Passion of Christ? Oh, you're not a Christian? Can I speak to a Christian instead? I'm not comfortable talking to a non-god believer"

"My 12 year old patient needs a septoplasty. Yes, she wants a nose job."

"I, um, had oral sex and my skirt got stained. Can you pay for it to be cleaned?"

"Can you find a physical therapist for my daughter she doesn't try to slap? She has issues about being touched... yes, she's 16. She's got a hard punch, too"

and on and on...

[Suezoled]

Me: Hello how can I he-
Caller: Hello? Hello? Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello Hello
Me: are you just gonna keep saying "hello?"
Caller: Hello? Oh, I didn't hear you! Hello? Are you still there?
Me: Yes I am
Caller: Hello?
Me: What do you want?
Caller: Hello? I need to set up a case. Hello? Hello? Hello?
Me: yes???
Caller: Hello? This is for inpatient surgery. Hello?
Me: Who is the patient?
Caller: Hello? Patient is John Smith Hello? Hello?
Me: What is a surgery of?
Caller: Hello? Hello? Hello? It's for...hold on... I have to look it up. Hello? Hello?
Me: YES???
Caller: Hold on, okay? Hello?
Me: (trying to claw my throat out with post-it notes) YES????
Caller: Hello? Oh, it's removal of part of his liver. Hello? Hello?
Me: [set up case] here's your number. I'm sending you to the nurse.
Caller: Hello? What? Hello? Hello?
Me: WHAT???
Caller: oh. Well, I don't want you to hang up on me.

[Chanileslie]

Me: [Dials number] Hi SoandSo, this is Chani, I am attempting to have a denial upheld. Could you please call me back as soon as possible. Thanks.
SoandSo: Who the heck knows because he/she/it didn't call back!!!

Me: [Dials number] Hi You, this is Chani. I need some information on the billing and subrogation, as I am attempting to prevent us from being heavily fined. Please call me back as soon as possible.
You: Who the heck knows because he/she/it didn't call back!!!

Me: [Dials number] Hi Person-behind-door-number-3, this is Chani. I am attempting to assure that we are compliant with DIR, and I need to know the exact date our fiscal year ends. Please call me back ASAP.
Person-behind-door-number-3: Who the heck knows because he/she/it didn't call back!!!

I am beginning to think that when my number comes up there is a little warning that says: don't answer this call and don't ever reply!! Is it so difficult to reply? I always answer my phone and when I am unable to do so, I always return calls. [sigh]

[Flame]

Grrrr.

This is supposed to be a day where I reflect on the wonderful happenings 2, 5 and __ years ago.
My son, daughter and mum were born on this day 2, 5 and ___ year ago.

So I'm off to get the 'replacement bicycle' (see our website for details on this issue) and drive past a whippet who is obviously not doing well.

*sigh* I do the right thing and turn the car around, hop up onto the verge and put on the warning signals.

When I get over to this doglet there is another dog with her and he is frantically trying to cajole her into getting up and following him.
He's having no luck.

I walk over to her and then she does get up, quite obviously in pain, and hobbles four feet or so and lays down again.
After a couple attempts I realise that I am not going to get to her, and worse I may drive her off to lay in pain somewhere not so accessible.
Mind, I've got the two boys sitting in the car so I wouldn't have been able to follow if she did go far.

So I phoned a friend who is warden at the nearest pound and she says "That's DSPCA territory my friend. Call them and ask for Lorna"

This is precisely what I do and Lorna tells me the warden will be round in 5-10 minutes.

Eventually the warden shows up. He crouches down and calls to the whippet, but she's not interested.
He gets up and walks towards her, and with that she gets up and moves back another four feet. He tried this twice more with the same result each time.

Imagine how flabbergasted I was when he walked back towards me saying that her shoulder was busted up from what he could see and that he didn't think he'd be able to catch her... He was leaving!

I smiled and said I understood. I am applying for a job with the pounds/dspca soon and I don't want a complaint on the books with my name on it - For the sake of the other many dogs I can help once I'm in the job, I'll have to leave this situation alone (as far as the DSPCA goes anyhow)

I've been on to one of my friends who has a wildlife rescue organisation, and we are going out to try to catch this girl and take her on to the vet's office.

She is also near to a 'halting site' where there are 'travellers' who don't take too kindly to people 'stealing' their dogs... If she belongs to them there may be trouble, but we have to try as she won't get medical attention from them!

What pisses me off is that I was the first person who even stopped to look, and she had been hit early on in the morning. I know this because a 'kind' passerby informed me she had been hit down the road.

Wish us luck.

I don't know if the tone comes through in the post, but I am feeling so let down (by the DSPCA) and frustrated nearly to tears.

Update later...

[Tanja]

Hi Suezoled and others,

I haven't noticed this thread before, so I read all of it just now - it must be the best read ever. From my own experience, nothing is as upsetting as having to deal with really stupid people who are convinced they are right.

Until last week, I worked in a job where I was helping victims of crime - and victims as all other people come in all types, so there were some really adorable people, but some complete b**tards as well. Normally, the good experiences would cancel the bad experiences out and make me go on.

Anyway, if I will ever be writing a script for a black comedy, I will invite you to be my script consultant. This is very unlikely as I have no talent for writing whatsoever, but still.

[Flame]

Update:

Went out and tried to catch her. She's more mobile now than this morning, contrary to what the warden believed, her injury appears severe but only affecting muscle etc... She doesn't appear (by what we saw when she was trotting away) to have broken bones (or not badly anyway).

I know where she is and I'll keep an eye out and try to catch her in the future as the itinerants denied knowledge of her - She's definetly in heat, so hopefully she can be caught, spayed and rehomed.

I hope that she doesn't have internal injuries that we couldn't see :(

I can't go back out now though because I've got birthday kids to attend to!

Toni

[kookbreaker]

OK, Suezoled needs to collect these stories and put them on a webpage in the style of Acts Of Gord (http://www.actsofgord.com). Insert appropriate sarcastic comments as needed

Instead of commentary on the video game industry, we could have articles on the quacks and their ilk.

We can name it:

The Call of Suezoled!

[Suezoled]

heh... Maybe Kookbreaker.

Caller: My husband needs to go to a chiropractor. It's an emergency!
Me: he's in serious pain?
Caller: Yes! We need a case approved right away!
Me: if he's in serious enough pain, maybe he should go to an emergency room
Caller: well... it's not that kind of emergency.
Me: There are two types of cases, basically: Emergency, which included outpatient, inpatient, urgent or direct admissions, or scheduled cases, which are inpatient or outpatient, but always scheduled. Scheduled procedures not emergencies. Chiropractors do not fall under emergency catagories.
Caller: my husband is in SERIOUS pain and needs to see his chiropractor right away!
Me: You can either request a case set up, and the chiro case manager will call you back, or you can go to the emergency room.
Caller: But they don't have chiropractors in the emergency room!
Me: tells you something, doesn't it?
Caller: huh...what?
Me: nevermind. whichi do you want? set up a cases or go to ER?
Caller: um.... will the ER be paid for?
Me: if there is medical necessity, yes
Caller: ... set up the case. I don't want to risk this not being paid!

[hawkins_anderson]

eh, sawwwright. LOL.

[Suezoled]

THis happened to a coworker on a call she took:

Her: hello?
Patient: I WANT THEM BACK!
Her: ...?
Patient: my psychic... my f*cking psychic told me I had breast cancer. She told me the lumps in my breast were cancer, and my mom died of the same thing.
Her: WHAT???
Patient: So I listened to her and had my breasts taken off. The doctor told me they were just cysts, but he's a medical doctor and wanted to put chemicals in my body. The psychic told me if I had them removed it would stop the cancer. So I paid for it myself.
Her: So you didn't go for a second opinion? What did the surgeon say?
Patient: I trusted her. She's always been honest with me. But..but she LIED. My mom didn't die of breast cancer. She died of heart attacks. I'm suing that pyschic, I'm gonna take her for every g*ddamn cent she has!
Her: What does this have to do with us?
Patient: You recommended the doctor [turns out she recommended the surgeon, any surgeon, who was participating in the area]!!!! I'm gonna take all you f*ckers that g*ddamned psychic and you're all gonna hear form my lawyer.

End call

This happened a couple weeks ago. Haven't heard from her since.

[Iamme]

I had to clear a clogged sewer pipe that backed up into a basement, and then clean up the juice. I sprinkled bleach in the water and sloshed it around with a broom. The sprinkles spotted my new shoe laces. They look kind of neat that way.

The other day I had a good bean burrito from one of the mexican franchises. It cost 49 cents. Bush is taking credit for this:D

Last week I had to clean up a flood in a basement caused by massive snow melt. I go into this basement computer room and on the screen is this rotation of women sporting their giant chalunkas. I mean...we are talking GIANT here. It took me a while to finally get started on cleaning up the mess. I also went outside and shopvaced the parking lot. No joke. (That's where the basement water was coming from)

[Suezoled]

True story (well, so were the others): patient broke her humurous bone and is getting physical therapy starting April 1.


Sometimes timing is everything.

[Chaos]

Originally posted by Suezoled
True story (well, so were the others): patient broke her humurous bone and is getting physical therapy starting April 1.


Sometimes timing is everything.

Sorry to spoil your joke, but it is called the "humerus" - that´s the big bone in the upper arm. I have to know - I broke part of it, the epicondylus radialis humeri, the part in the elbow that joins the humerus with the radius (in the lower arm), four years ago.

You better get ready to pay LOTS of therapy.

[Suezoled]

Originally posted by Chaos


Sorry to spoil your joke, but it is called the "humerus" - that´s the big bone in the upper arm. I have to know - I broke part of it, the epicondylus radialis humeri, the part in the elbow that joins the humerus with the radius (in the lower arm), four years ago.

You better get ready to pay LOTS of therapy.
No, trust me this time Chaos, it was humorous. This lady had no sense of humour about it.

When I broke my humerus in a horse riding accident it was a pretty clean break, and I thought it was funny.

[Virgil]

found out today a fomer post doc I over lapped with died of liver cancer.

Virgil

[Soapy Sam]

Suez- Friendly word of caution. The tales from the crypt are interesting and entertaining, but if I happened to be one of your callers, I would be less than impressed to know you were repeating them here. As might your boss.

[Suezoled]

Quite aware thank you though, Sam.

I checked before I started posting and as long as I don't reveal actual names and locations, and I trim out details, I am not in violation of confidentiality legally, nor by the company.

As for whether or not you're my caller: I doubt you'd recognize yourself in these calls, or maybe you'd recognize yourself in more than one call. I do generalize things or change details a bit, to protect the caller, while trying to keep the flavor of absurdity.

[Eos of the Eons]

Darn it. I thought I would be seeing another story about a caller or two here. Well, still looking forward to the next time one appears!

[Suezoled]

oh, okay. kid: 10 years old. About 4 feet high. 200lbs. Yup. 200 lbs. The doctors wanted to give this kid a gastric bypass. Had to explain why a gastric bypass is not done on children. Even those who are so big they can barely walk.

[Soapy Sam]

Are mouth bypasses permitted on kids?;)

[Wudang]

I'm a tech support guy and my direct line is 1 digit different from a local health clinic - swap the 5 for an 8. So usually it's fine "No you dialled 5 instead of 8" "Oh sorry to trouble you" "No trouble, bye" etc.
Except once
me: "&Company, BOFH speaking"
caller"hello, this is Mr xxxxx. Can you help? The bit's fallen out my hearing aid and it doesn't work?"
me:"I'm very sorry, but you've dialled a 5 instead of an 8 and got &Company instead of the doctors"
caller:"What? I can't hear you. The bit's come out my hearing aid!"
me:"Sigh"
caller:"I've no transport"
me:raised voice"I'm sorry but you need to dial 01xxxx8xxxx for the doctors"
caller:"So you can you help? Because I can't hear"
.......
Each of the several calls went on for several minutes. What could I do? Couldn't quite catch the surname first time around. I don't get callerid through our PBX. Poor old sod sounds stuck on his own with nobody in the blasted world he feels he can call on.


I have some hysterically funny stories about a UK A&E told me by a military friend who did some triage training there. The drunk abusive patients were often "cough" somewhat disconcerted by the different "ahem" principles of client management applied by an NHS nurse on the one hand and an MP and a para on the other. I'm not sure they're suitable for a family show.