BEST bumper sticker EVER

[Magyar]

I was coming back to the office today and pulled up behind a septic tank truck.

If the light was not as long as it was I probalby would not have noticed the bumber sticker.




Caution
Vehicle May be Transporting
Political Promises

[Soapy Sam]

"Nuke a Baby Whale for Jesus" seemed to offend most people for your dollar.

The ones I don't get are those "Caution! Baby on board!" things.

Babies aren't dangerous- unless he's actually driving.

[casebro]

I had one that must have been printed on teflon, it lasted 20 years:

"Will Rogers never met Howard Cosell"

When it was new, people asked me "Who is Will Rogers?"

When it was old, people asked me "Who is Howard Cosell?"

[wahrheit]

http://officespam.chattablogs.com/archives/poo-pmpr.jpg

[learner]

"Nuke a Baby Whale for Jesus" seemed to offend most people for your dollar.

The ones I don't get are those "Caution! Baby on board!" things.

Babies aren't dangerous- unless he's actually driving.

I think the "caution baby on board" things are to let emergency services know in case of an accident. babies can be overlooked i suppose. well, its what i was told anyway.

[Worm]

Snopes (and common sense) suggest otherwise.

The sign could work like that, potentially, if people only ever used it when they actually had a baby on board, and the sign couldn't move about in a crash and never be seen.

As I understand it, the original intention was intended to give a message of something like 'please drive carefuly, there is a baby in this vehicle' - and I'm not convinced that would have any effect anyway.

[Ocelot]

The baby on board sign is a fertility boast. What it really says is look at me I'm fecund.

[Foolmewunz]

Baby on Board alwasy seemed to me to belong to people who thought it was a 007 license to do whatever the hell they pleased. People who post them in their windows generally change lanes without using signals, stop for no apparent reason, and double park to block an entire three lane roadway.

And there's never a baby in there. Never. I'm still looking for one.

There's a guy with a purple (yeah, purple!) Range Rover here who's had that sign in his rear window for six years. The kid's in first grade, already! Give it a rest!

[TX50]

They're just a stupid "look at me" sign. When a baby's strapped into a
proper car seat [s]he's probably the best protected person aboard.

[Charlie Monoxide]

I just caught this one yesterday and laughed out loud when I saw it.


Charlie (strictly for South Park fans) Monoxide

[AZAtheist]

08 The End Of An Error

[LibraryLady]

Anyone notice the license plate on the truck?

My favorite bumper sticker to date is still "Evolution is just a theory. Like gravity."

[Skeptical Greg]

Did anyone besides me ever send off for the " Bumper Sticker Repair Kit " ...

It had various sizes of stickers depicting a wood screw..

The idea was to use the stickers to cover the hearts in those annoying ....

" I Love my -- Yorkie, German Shepard, Dachshund - whatever - " bumper stickers ..

[slingblade]

Gallagher had a couple of good ones:

I (club) my wife

I (spade) my dog

:D

[four elevener]

I saw a bumper sticker a long time ago that simply said BUMPER STICKER.

[Fnord]

I've seen this classic on more than one hybrid car here in California:

I May Be Slow, But
I Am Ahead Of You!

[crackers]

My current favorite bumper sticker was on a beat-up old pickup truck:

Honk if parts fall off

[Chaos]

One of my favorites is "If you **** like you drive, you´ll never get that one in". :D

Plus, on an East German Trabbi shortly after the re-unification: "He came, he saw, he stank", paraphrasing Julius Caesar (the Trabbi was infamous for its smell, especially when using East German fuel). The Trabbi was also generally known as "the racing cardboard box" ("Die Rennpappe"), and I saw that one as a bumper sticker a few times, as well.

Plus, of course, the old stand-by, "If you can read this, you´re tailgating".

[Foolmewunz]

I always thought someone in Quebec would make one that said, "If You Can Read This, You're in the Wrong Province. Tabernacle!"

[quarky]

Having recently been on a long road trip (U.S.), I was struck by the lack of bumper stickers.

Just boring looking cars. I miss hippy cars and junkers and hitch-hikers. Its getting very homogenized out there.

[TX50]

The Trabbi was also generally known as "the racing cardboard box" ("Die Rennpappe")

There used to be a joke about a Westerner who ordered a
Trabbi because of a misunderstanding about the exact
meaning of "hand made in Germany". A friend asks him how
it's going with the car he ordered from Germany "It's going
great" the guy says, "they just now sent me a cardboard
mockup, and it even drives!". :D

I only write this because it's the first joke I ever learned in
German ;)

[Blue Mountain]

One year, driving along the Trans-Canada highway in the dead of winter, I passed by a car pulled over on to the shoulder, slowly turning into snowbank, with a license plate that read:

U LOSE

[Ladewig]

If you agree to not pray in my school, I'll agree to not think in your church.

[John_Geeshu]

"Somewhere in Texas a village is missing its idiot" is great.

[Skeptical Greg]

" I Brake For The Hell Of It "

" If you Don't Like The Way I Drive, Get Off the Sidewalk "

[Boo]

Wrong side up on a Jeep: "If you can read this, turn me over"



Boo

[BPSCG]

Wrong side up on a Jeep: "If you can read this, turn me over"I've seen that on the bottom of a kayak, too.

Of course, any kayaker who needs that kind of help shouldn't be on the river anyway.

[Hamradioguy]

The humorist Jean Shepherd once claimed he saw a bumper sticker on a car being transported to the junk yard. The car had been in a horrific wreck-completley smashed-all twisted metal. The bumper sticker read: "I'm On My Way To The Promised Land"

[rdaneel]

Baby on Board alwasy seemed to me to belong to people who thought it was a 007 license to do whatever the hell they pleased. People who post them in their windows generally change lanes without using signals, stop for no apparent reason, and double park to block an entire three lane roadway.

And there's never a baby in there. Never. I'm still looking for one.

There's a guy with a purple (yeah, purple!) Range Rover here who's had that sign in his rear window for six years. The kid's in first grade, already! Give it a rest!I'm reminded of an old 80's sketch where a mother is complaining that people ignore her "Baby on Board" sign. She's introduced to a new product, "Baby on Bumper" (with accessory product, "Bugs off Baby").

[Aitch]

I saw a bumper sticker a long time ago that simply said BUMPER STICKER.

Hmmm, I wonder if IBM had an equivalent one that read This Sticker Intentionally Left Blank. :)

[Confuseling]

Baby on Board alwasy seemed to me to belong to people who thought it was a 007 license to do whatever the hell they pleased. People who post them in their windows generally change lanes without using signals, stop for no apparent reason, and double park to block an entire three lane roadway.

And there's never a baby in there. Never. I'm still looking for one.

There's a guy with a purple (yeah, purple!) Range Rover here who's had that sign in his rear window for six years. The kid's in first grade, already! Give it a rest!

I was on the bumper cars at a fairground once. I bumped into a car side on, and looked up to see a man scowling at me and nodding towards the baby he was clutching.

He had one of those "I've just got onto one of these dimly lit strobing fairground rides, in which the object is to drive into each other quickly, with my new baby, and you're a very bad person" looks you don't see very often.

He didn't have a sticker.

[Primus]

Who takes a baby on dodgems!? Can you imagine explaning that to the wife.

"Sorry darling, I just was taking the baby on the bumper cars and some idiot hit me, baby flew straight out. I know the nerve of some people"

Also "I Brake for Tailgaters" a personal favorite of mine.

[cgordon]

On the back of a honey wagon in a village near Stuttgart:

Ja, Meine Scheiss stinkt, aber Deine auch!

[madurobob]

My recent favorite:
"Not responsible for bullet holes in gravel truck windows"

[matty.the.damned]

I always liked "The only way to bring up children is to eat them first."

MtD

[skeptic of oz]

Yeah I think that the "Political Promises"sticker is quite clever and humerous.

One thing though...if anything I think that political promises are much more dangerous than what was in that truck!

[TexasJack]

In rebuttal to those obnoxious honor student bumper stickers: "My kid knocked up your honor student"

[alex04]

Plus, of course, the old stand-by, "If you can read this, you´re tailgating".


well if their sticker was bigger, i wouldn't have to drive so close to read it

[DoubtingStephen]

Who takes a baby on dodgems!? Can you imagine explaning that to the wife.

"Sorry darling, I just was taking the baby on the bumper cars and some idiot hit me, baby flew straight out. I know the nerve of some people"
.

My father took me on a bumper car ride when I were a wee lad knee high to a knee, and he did so over my mother's very atypical protests.

The first time we hit something my face hit the dashboard and I got a bloody nose.

My favorite bumper sticker, seen on the bumper of a car leaving a Catholic hospital in Worcester MA many years ago:

"Protect the rights of unborn women"

[Modified]

Did anyone besides me ever send off for the " Bumper Sticker Repair Kit " ...

It had various sizes of stickers depicting a wood screw..

The idea was to use the stickers to cover the hearts in those annoying ....

" I Love my -- Yorkie, German Shepard, Dachshund - whatever - " bumper stickers ..

One of my favorites is one of those with the explanation underneath: (I heart my cat's head)

[Confuseling]

The baby, it must be admitted, looked quite surprised.

[grayman]

I don't put stickers on my car.

On my motorcycle helmet, however, I have several smaller stickers. A sample:

"Born OK the first time"

"Your kid may be an honor student but you're a friggin' moron"

"The older I get, the better I was"

"He was a brave man who first ate the oyster"

My favorite:

"Short form of the Serenity Prayer, **** IT!" (Without the asterisks of course)

[bozothedeathmachine]

Here's one for the über-nerd set.

It's a red sticker that says "If this sticker is blue you're going to fast."

[El_Spectre]

I used to have 2 bumper stickers I really liked:

"Thank you for not breeding" and "Save the planet, kill yourself"

At least monthly, some aging hippy would congratulate me on my "earth conscious" thinking. It broke their little hearts when I told 'em I was just being antisocial.

One I always wanted was "Conserve oxygen -- Shut Up!" ...

[TjW]

My favorite: "Happiness is the second coming".

Works for Christian and non-Christian alike.