You're the president of the United States

[Abdul Alhazred]

Fantasy time!

You're the president of the United States. What has already happened has happened. No stuff and nonsense about what you would have done.

What do you do now?

Before you answer, please remember that the president of the United States isn't Jehovah. Keep it to things a president could do.

Preferably, keep it to things a president could do constitutionally. But don't let that hold you back.

[Evolver]

Watch out for pretzels.

[geni]

Nothing (99% of the time this is the best thing a politicain can do)

[Drooper]

hmmm, let's see.

Take a spin in my Presidential helicopter.

Take a spin in my Presidential aeroplane.

Have my secretary call Meg Ryan and invite her round for a private dinner and cosey weekend at Camp David.

Oh yeah, and go to lots of sport, starting with the World Series, then the World Rugby Cup Final - best seats in the house of course.

[NoZed Avenger]

Take a memo:

"From now on, all interns are to be 17-24 year old cheerleaders. Further memos regarding proper dress in the oval office will follow."

[Thanz]

I'm the president? How can that be? I was never elec--. Oh, wait, I forgot. That doesn't matter.

I would end this traditional marriage protection crap and attempt to make sure that states comply with the "full faith and credit" thing so that gay couples who get married in one state are married in another.

Is that within my mythical power?

[Abdul Alhazred]

Originally posted by Drooper
hmmm, let's see.

Take a spin in my Presidential helicopter.

Take a spin in my Presidential aeroplane.

Have my secretary call Meg Ryan and invite her round for a private dinner and cosey weekend at Camp David.

Oh yeah, and go to lots of sport, starting with the World Series, then the World Rugby Cup Final - best seats in the house of course.

I welcome answers from other countries, but World Rugby Cup Final dammit??!!

I said president of the United States!

If I'm not going to get serious answers I can deal with that. But gee whiz!

At least rugby has a somewhat football-shaped football, if you know what I mean. So you're all right.

[Aoidoi]

Well, assuming I'm not too worried about being re-elected (or elected, whatever) or assassinated:

Totally revamp the INS. Actually keep track of those that come into the country, keep a current database of who is where and who should be gone. I don't want the rules more strict, I just want them actually implemented.

Force interagency cooperation between the CIA and FBI, make them less warring factions and more cooperative partners. This is to improve dealing with terrorist groups, but also criminals that flee the country and criminals from other countries that come the the US. (this would be next to impossible, but hey, it's hypothetical anyway :p)

Stop the faith based crap. Immediately. No more money for churches.

Implement that do not call list (ok, more Congress but whatever).

Revoke Scientology's religious status and arrest the leaders for fraud etc. (not even sure if the pres could do this, but I would anyway :p)

Issue an executive order that makes the Yankees wear their uniforms inside out. No reason.

Give the IRS the ability to go after accounting companies pushing illegal tax loopholes. (probably more congress again)

... then, in the afternoon of my first day... ;)

[Tony]

Campaign to end the federal income tax.

Campaign to end federal drug laws.

Campaign to legalize prostitution.

Kick the UN off US soil.

Campaign to make English the official language of America.

Campaign to end all federal gun laws.

Aggressively push for human rights in the third world.

End affirmative action.

That’s all I can think of right now.


edit to add: Just thought of more....

Campaign to repeal the 17th amendment.

Campaign for an amendment making "executive orders" illegal.

Campaign to end all drinking and smoking ages, and other forms of age discrimination.

[Abdul Alhazred]

Originally posted by Thanz
I'm the president? How can that be? I was never elec--. Oh, wait, I forgot. That doesn't matter.

I would end this traditional marriage protection crap and attempt to make sure that states comply with the "full faith and credit" thing so that gay couples who get married in one state are married in another.

Is that within my mythical power?

I like what you say, but no.

That is a matter for the states. If it is to be done, it must be done one state at a time. Or in one state and then a Supreme Court case about a gay married couple moving to another state.

We're getting there, and it doesn't matter about the president.

Constitutional government is a wonderful thing.

The president of the United States has the power to evaporate any enemy city, but he isn't Jehovah or for that matter an absolute ruler.

[Jeff Wagg]

If I'm the president, I go to the UN and apologize. I ask the world community to please help with the situation in Iraq, and offer a support role only..it's time to let others take the leadership.

In Afghanistan, I continue to hunt Al Qaeda members, since they were the ones who attacked us.

I consider declaring Saudi Arabia an enemy state.

I lobby for a gradual increase in gas taxes to pay for alternative energy sources.

I never mention the word "god" or especially "lord."

And I bemoan what a miserable job it is.

[Abdul Alhazred]

I will note what I agree or disagree with. But I will also note what the president has the constitutional power to do.

Campaigning for something is something any citizen can do, though the president certainly has more "juice".

If something is not the president's job, I will note with NTPJ.

If something is a state not a federal matter, I will note with SNF.

Originally posted by Tony
Campaign to end the federal income tax.

Campaign to end federal drug laws.

Agree. NTPJ.

Campaign to legalize prostitution.

Agree. NTPJ SNF.

Kick the UN off US soil.

<font size=+2>BRAVO!</font>, but ultmately NTPJ. Congress approved the UN originally, didn't it?

Campaign to make English the official language of America.

Disagree. Why? Please make a new thread to discuss. NTPJ.

Campaign to end all federal gun laws.

Agree. NTPJ.

Aggressively push for human rights in the third world.

<font size=+2>BRAVO!</font>. Part of the job, though the other branches of government must have a role.

End affirmative action.

End it? Or modify it to be less racial? in any case, NTPJ SNF.

That’s all I can think of right now.

edit to add: Just thought of more....

Campaign to repeal the 17th amendment.

Direct election of senators. Why? Not arguing just asking. NTPJ of course, but I never though of this as an issue.

Campaign for an amendment making "executive orders" illegal.

<font size=+2>BRAVO!</font>. NTPJ.

Campaign to end all drinking and smoking ages, and other forms of age discrimination.
A matter for local option. NTPJ SNF.

The poor schnook W can evaporate cities with the proper justification, but he cannot regulate how you live day by day. I genuinely believe that's not even his ambition.

For that stuff, petty tyrants in your own town are the ones to look out for.

[Tony]

Originally posted by Abdul Alhazred


Disagree. Why? Please make a new thread to discuss. NTPJ.


To keep foreigners and enemies of the US from moving in taking over. See "Aztlan" (sp?).

e it? Or modify it to be less racial? in any case, NTPJ SNF.

You got me there. How about this? Completely remove the racial aspect from AA, make it purely financial based.

ect election of senators. Why? Not arguing just asking. NTPJ of course, but I never though of this as an issue.

To take the power away from special interest groups.

[Abdul Alhazred]

Me: Direct election of senators. Why? Not arguing just asking. NTPJ of course, but I never though of this as an issue.

The other guy: To take the power away from special interest groups.


How exactly do special interest groups get more power by the direct election of senators? Again not arguing. I really don't understand what you're getting at.

Maybe this one needs a separate thread. PM me if you start one.

[Abdul Alhazred]

Originally posted by Tony

You got me there. How about this? Completely remove the racial aspect from AA, make it purely financial based.


It would still tend to favor "minorities", but wouldn't create the same resentment among poor whites who might qualify. What's wrong with that?

[Tmy]

Id try too:

End the Cuban embargo

Give DC representation

Decriminalize pot

Move th UN out of NewYork

prescription reform

bulid nuke power plants

tear down Confederate memorials

change the national anthem to Bel Biv Devo's "Do Me"

[LFTKBS]

1) Create Department of Peace; appoint Howard Zinn as Secretary.
2) Appoint David Cross as Secretary of State.
3) Pardon all prisoners whose only crime was possession of drugs or drug paraphenailia.
4) Find a way to revoke the tax-exempt status of churches.
5) Not overthrow foreign governments.
6) Some stuff Tony said, but not that English-only nonsense.
7) Get assassinated by Jesus freak.

[Tony]

Originally posted by LFTKBS
4) Find a way to revoke the tax-exempt status of churches.


Separation of church and state is a two way street.

5) Not overthrow foreign governments.

What about powerful individuals who sieze power, brutalize and murder the populace?

6) Some stuff Tony said, but not that English-only nonsense.

Why not?

[LFTKBS]

Separation of church and state is a two way street.

Okay, zing. I retract that point.

What about powerful individuals who sieze power, brutalize and murder the populace?

Let me expand by saying "not overthrow foreign governments based on a whim." I'm talking about like Allende stuff.

(re: English-only):Why not?

Because English isn't the only language spoken in the U.S. Because English-only programs put U.S. citizens who don't speak English as a first language at a disadvantage. Because it's unnecessary. Because Puerto Ricans are U.S. citizens. Because it's a form of discrimination. Because the presence of other languages in America is a strength and not a weakness. Need more?

[Tony]

Originally posted by LFTKBS

Because English isn't the only language spoken in the U.S.

So?

Because English-only programs put U.S. citizens who don't speak English as a first language at a disadvantage.

And they arent at a disadvantage now?

Because Puerto Ricans are U.S. citizens.

And they're too stupid to learn english?

Because it's a form of discrimination.

No it's not.

Because the presence of other languages in America is a strength and not a weakness.

Its neither a strength nor a weakness.

[Thanz]

I don't want to derail this too much, but what benefit is there to declaring English the official language? What is the point?

[Tony]

Originally posted by Thanz
I don't want to derail this too much, but what benefit is there to declaring English the official language? What is the point?


I already one of the reasons. Its a few posts up.

[LFTKBS]

Originally posted by Tony
To keep foreigners and enemies of the US from moving in taking over

What, seriously? Taking over? What does that even mean?

Re: Puerto Rico: no, they're not too stupid to learn English, nor did I imply that, and you know it. I, however, am too stupid to learn Spanish, for what it's worth. I live in Arizona, and we have a large population of Spanish-speaking residents. How would I like it if I went to vote in a predominantly Spanish-speaking district and was told that I couldn't get voting instructions in English?

Re: "No it's not." Great argument there, Tony. How is it not discrimination when a citizen of this country attempts to communicate with a government that supposedly represents him or her, only to be told, "sorry, we'll take your tax dollars but we won't talk to you."

But seriously, Tony, please expand on this: "To keep foreigners and enemies of the US from moving in taking over."

So basically we should not allow immigration of would-be Americans because they don't speak English?

[Tony]

Originally posted by LFTKBS



But seriously, Tony, please expand on this: "To keep foreigners and enemies of the US from moving in taking over."



I did expand on it. Do you know what Aztlan (sp?) is?

[Ladewig]

1) Honor treaties that were signed by the U.S. before I took office.

2) Work towards making sure the EPA has all the tools and resources necessary to do its job.

3) Come up with conditions for releasing Gitmo Bay detainees. Something other than, "they may leave when the war of terror is over."

4) allow the media free and unfettered access to White House press conferences

5) Stop signing no-bid contracts with Halliburton.

Well, my first five having me working in the opposite direction as GWB.

6) Work towards eliminating or reforming asset seizure laws in drug cases.

7) Work towards implementing asset seizure laws in accounting fraud cases. We have to get tough on crime. :p

8) Trim back the number of high-ranking officers and increases the number of foot soldiers

9) Give a speech and declare in my best Kennedy accent, "that this nation commit itself to achieving the goal, before the decade is out, of being completely independent of foreign oil." (with a tip of the hat to Bill Maher)

10) Take steps to make it harder to sell homeopathic remedies.

11) Work towards dividing California into two states (north and south) and simultaneously work towards making Connecticut and Rhode Island one state. Are these two states economically, commercially, industrially, socially, environmentally, agriculturally, or geographically different enough to require 4 senators to represent the people living there?

12) Reform federal campaign laws to allow third party candidates to get on the ballot more easily.

14) Have NASA cut back on manned space flight; use saved money to search for NEOs.

15) Respect the Constitution.

16) Respect states' rights and eliminate legislation that does not.

17) Ask congress for a bill which eliminates Constitutional rights for corporations.

18) Institute a patriotic tax such that every time someone says, "God bless America," he has to pay $ 0.20 for every person within hearing. :roll:

[TillEulenspiegel]

OK 1 minute tho....was I elected or was I appointed?

[Abdul Alhazred]

Originally posted by LFTKBS
1) Create Department of Peace; appoint Howard Zinn as Secretary.

The Department of State is supposed to take care of such things. If they aren't doing the job that's a reasonable issue. But why create a whole new department and staff it with failed academics?

After the Second World War, the Department of the Navy was combined with the Department of War to form the Department of Defense.

Let's change the name of the Department of Defence to the Department of Peace. Yeah, that'll work. :rolleyes: :p

[Thumper]

Things I would do if elected president...

1) Combine the departments of Education, Housing and Urban Development and Health and Human Services back into one department with reduced staff.

2) Never use the word 'God' in any speech.

3) Fight for budgets that would fully fund the ESA, EPA, and the USFS (and related agencies/laws).

4) Tax the rich more, the poor less.

5) Increase taxes (both personal and corporate taxes) to create budget surplus, and pay down the debt.

6) Continue the war in Iraq, but with greater international cooperation. I think that a different, more conciliatory, president can accomplish this.

7) Instruct (encourage) Congress to pay our debt to the UN. Appoint an ambassador to the UN who is more interested in human rights and more knowledgable about the debt crisis in the world (ours and the third-world's).

8) Require the Patent Office to only patent objects that are scientifically feasible, by putting the burden of proof on the applicant.

9) Instruct (encourage) Congress to eliminate exemptions for 'dietary supplements' and homeopathic drugs.

10) Get fast-track authority from Congress and negotiate a Western Hemisphere free trade zone.

11) Guarantee a veto on any bill that:
a) restricts a citizen's right to own a gun. (sane non-felon)
b) specifies marriage = one man, one woman.
c) reduces the strength of any current environmental law.

I guess that's enough for now. I'm sure I could think of some economic things to do, like increase the gasoline tax for the public (but not the government) or ease immigration restrictions, etc.

[peptoabysmal]

<hr>
1. U.S. acceptance of coexistence as the only alternative to atomic war.

2. U.S. willingness to capitulate in preference to engaging in atomic war.

3. Develop the illusion that total disarmament (by) the United States would be a demonstration of moral strength.

4. Permit free trade between all nations regardless of Communist affiliation and regardless of whether or not items could be used for war.

5. Extension of long-term loans to Russia and Soviet satellites.

6. Provide American aid to all nations regardless of Communist domination.

7. Grant recognition of Red China. Admission of Red China to the U.N.

8. Set up East and West Germany as separate states in spite of Khrushchev's promise in 1955 to settle the German question by free elections under supervision of the U.N.

9. Prolong the conferences to ban atomic tests because the United States has agreed to suspend tests as long as negotiations are in progress.

10. Allow all Soviet satellites individual representation in the U.N.

11. Promote the U.N. as the only hope for mankind. If its charter is rewritten, demand that it be set up as a one-world government with its own independent armed forces. (Some Communist leaders believe the world can be taken over as easily by the U.N. as by Moscow. Sometimes these two centers compete with each other as they are now doing in the Congo.)

12. Resist any attempt to outlaw the Communist Party.

13. Do away with all loyalty oaths.

14. Continue giving Russia access to the U.S. Patent Office.

15. Capture one or both of the political parties in the United States.

16. Use technical decisions of the courts to weaken basic American institutions by claiming their activities violate civil rights.

17. Get control of the schools. Use them as transmission belts for socialism and current Communist propaganda. Soften the curriculum. Get control of teachers' associations. Put the party line in textbooks.

18. Gain control of all student newspapers.

19. Use student riots to foment public protests against programs of organizations which are under Communist attack.

20. Infiltrate the press. Get control of book-review assignments, editorial writing, policymaking positions.

21. Gain control of key positions in radio, TV, and motion pictures.

22. Continue discrediting American culture by degrading all forms of artistic expression. An American Communist cell was told to "eliminate all good sculpture from parks and buildings, substitute shapeless, awkward and meaningless forms."

23. Control art critics and directors of art museums. "Our plan is to promote ugliness, repulsive, meaningless art."

24. Eliminate all laws governing obscenity by calling them "censorship" and a violation of free speech and free press.

25. Break down cultural standards of morality by promoting pornography and obscenity in books, magazines, motion pictures, radio and TV.

26. Present homosexuality, degeneracy and promiscuity as "normal, natural, healthy."

27. Infiltrate the churches and replace revealed religion with "social" religion. Discredit the Bible and emphasize the need for intellectual maturity which does not need a "religious crutch."

28. Eliminate prayer or any phase of religious expression in the schools on the grounds that it violates the principle of "separation of church and state."

29. Discredit the American Constitution by calling it inadequate, old-fashioned, out of step with modern needs, a hindrance to cooperation between nations on a worldwide basis.

30. Discredit the American Founding Fathers. Present them as selfish aristocrats who had no concern for the "common man."

31. Belittle all forms of American culture and discourage the teaching of American history on the grounds that it was only a minor part of the "big picture." Give more emphasis to Russian history since the Communists took over.

32. Support any socialist movement to give centralized control over any part of the culture--education, social agencies, welfare programs, mental health clinics, etc.

33. Eliminate all laws or procedures which interfere with the operation of the Communist apparatus.

34. Eliminate the House Committee on Un-American Activities.

35. Discredit and eventually dismantle the FBI.

36. Infiltrate and gain control of more unions.

37. Infiltrate and gain control of big business.

38. Transfer some of the powers of arrest from the police to social agencies. Treat all behavioral problems as psychiatric disorders which no one but psychiatrists can understand (or treat).

39. Dominate the psychiatric profession and use mental health laws as a means of gaining coercive control over those who oppose Communist goals.

40. Discredit the family as an institution. Encourage promiscuity and easy divorce.

41. Create the impression that violence and insurrection are legitimate aspects of the American tradition; that students and special-interest groups should rise up and use united force to solve economic, political or social problems.

43. Overthrow all colonial governments before native populations are ready for self-government.

44. Internationalize the Panama Canal.

45. Repeal the Connally reservation so the United States cannot prevent the World Court from seizing jurisdiction over domestic problems. Give the World Court jurisdiction over nations and individuals alike.

Just kidding! This is the list of Communist goals determined by the US in 1958.

<hr>

If I were President:

1) Reduce the National Debt and not raise taxes to do it. We do this by not borrowing money from foreign banks - period.

2) Reduce reliance on foreign oil and expand research into alternate fuel sources.

3) Stimulate the economy by reducing interest rates and creating special caps on home loans which specify that only fixed rate mortgages at low interests can be granted.

4) Cut 40% of social spending by eliminating programs and firing inefficient bureaucrats.

5) Send in enough US troops that Iraqi's couldn't move without bumping into one, and keep the UN out of Iraq.

6) Toughen up the borders of the US and make immigration much more difficult.

7) Return the control of education back to the educators and make the educators accountable for the results. Currently, the curriculum is dictated by bureaucrats who have an agenda to indoctrinate our children in Communist ideals.

8) Force Israel to stop settling on disputed territories and give the Palestinians the West Bank and Gaza strip. Pledge US air support including nuclear capability to defend the remaining boundaries of Israel.

9) Declare a legal hunting season on bureaucrats and lawyers. Perhaps even a bounty.

Do I get any votes? LOL

Edited to include lawyers in the hunting season.

[Solitaire]

Repeal the 11th amendment - the first ten were good enough! :D

[Abdul Alhazred]

Originally posted by Synchronicity
Repeal the 11th amendment - the first ten were good enough! :D

IIRC, the eleventh is the one that says you can't sue the Federal government in State court.

I started this thread, but I didn't answer my own question.

Thank the Invisible Pink Unicorn that I'm not the President of the United States.

I'm sure I couldn't handle it.

[LFTKBS]

Originally posted by Tony
I did expand on it. Do you know what Aztlan (sp?) is?

Not in this thread you didn't. AFAIK, Aztlan is the mythological place of origin of the Aztecs.

By the way, if you wanted to respond to my previous post with something resembling an argument, that would be great, thanks.