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View Full Version : The Miraculous Healing Power of the JREF Forum!


jasonpatterson
5th June 2009, 08:31 PM
I am convinced that the JREF forum has healing powers. I cut my finger the other day with a hacksaw, and it's been hurting every time I type. I've been asking the gods for help with my problem, and today, I received an answer! My mouse was fixed!

I've got a scroll mouse, and while the button function of the scroll wheel has continued working fine, the scrolling function died some months ago. Recently, while typing on the JREF forum I absentmindedly tried to scroll with the mouse, and it worked when I tried to go down the page, but not up. The mouse had been partially healed, but I was blind to the power of JREF's web-based aura. Luckily the gods smiled upon me again and completely fixed my mouse tonight! When that happened, I realized that this couldn't possibly have happened by chance, or because my 3 year old was banging it on the desk for half an hour earlier, but that it must have been a certified miracle!

Never mind that I was asking the gods to fix my finger, after all, prayers are often answered in ways we don't expect, and we all know that when the gods close Windows, they always open a port. I feel so blessed to have been present at this event; this has changed me and will deeply affect the rest of my life.

SusanB-M1
6th June 2009, 12:02 AM
A truly uplifting and inspiring story with which to start the day. Thank you.:D:D

Lucian
6th June 2009, 12:24 AM
I am convinced that the JREF forum has healing powers. I cut my finger the other day with a hacksaw, and it's been hurting every time I type. I've been asking the gods for help with my problem, and today, I received an answer! My mouse was fixed!

I've got a scroll mouse, and while the button function of the scroll wheel has continued working fine, the scrolling function died some months ago. Recently, while typing on the JREF forum I absentmindedly tried to scroll with the mouse, and it worked when I tried to go down the page, but not up. The mouse had been partially healed, but I was blind to the power of JREF's web-based aura. Luckily the gods smiled upon me again and completely fixed my mouse tonight! When that happened, I realized that this couldn't possibly have happened by chance, or because my 3 year old was banging it on the desk for half an hour earlier, but that it must have been a certified miracle!

Never mind that I was asking the gods to fix my finger, after all, prayers are often answered in ways we don't expect, and we all know that when the gods close Windows, they always open a port. I feel so blessed to have been present at this event; this has changed me and will deeply affect the rest of my life.

Hallelujah, brother, praise JREF. Now if your finger turns gangrenous, that's not JREF: JREF loves you; JREF is merciful and benevolent. That would be the work of some evil, sinful forum.

Hey, how many more miracles before the forum can become a saint?

rockinkt
6th June 2009, 02:16 PM
Did you get blood on your mouse from your cut finger?
Even an unintentional blood sacrifice can have great success - especially if you are a virgin.

tsig
6th June 2009, 09:02 PM
Hallelujah, brother, praise JREF. Now if your finger turns gangrenous, that's not JREF: JREF loves you; JREF is merciful and benevolent. That would be the work of some evil, sinful forum.

Hey, how many more miracles before the forum can become a saint?

If his finger does not heal right that means he did not disbelieve enough.

Miss_Kitt
7th June 2009, 12:58 AM
tsig, that deserve nomination for Pith!!

jasonpatterson
7th June 2009, 08:03 PM
My finger is healing through the grace of the JREF forums. I'm sure that if I stay strong in my faith for another week or so, I'll be good as new!

tsig
9th June 2009, 07:26 AM
tsig, that deserve nomination for Pith!!

Thanks.:blush:

Chimera
9th June 2009, 07:49 AM
If his finger does not heal right that means he did not disbelieve enough.

Awesome. :D:D

Correa Neto
9th June 2009, 08:00 AM
Send money as a sign of gratitude and conversion!
10% of your income will be enough.