When to safely resume sex after ghost hunting.

[Ladewig]

Skepbitch (http://skepbitch.wordpress.com/2009/07/02/ghost-hunting-can-be-a-real-pain-in-the-ass/) has an excellent review of ghost hunter Maryanna Chatelaine Moresby's article
"Sex after ghost hunting – exorcisms of a womb or anal ghosts: And when is the right time to have sex afterwards?"

Have you ever wondered when you should resume sex safely after ghost hunting? How can you exorcise a ghost that has possessed your womb? Or how can you remove a ghost from your rectum? (After you’ve finished with it, presumably.)

Look no further! Maryanna Chatelaine Moresby has treated these common problems in her article Sex after ghost hunting – exorcisms of a womb or anal ghosts: And when is the right time to have sex afterwards?

For today, let’s focus on “Anomalous Anal Ghost Phenomena”.

According to Moresby, when a person dies, their physical body ceases to exist, although a “ghost body” remains, consisting of the “mind, intellect, ego and soul”. Sometimes, these ghost bodies seek refuge in a human host, entering via a vulnerable cavity. Generally, they prefer to enter through the woman’s, um, birth canal, or the man’s rectum. Moresby says that the ass is an “open portal” for spirits. Why enter through a boring old ear or a mouth when you can invade a genital orifice?

-more-



A pleasant read.

[catbasket]

"PLEASE GHOST HUNT RESPONSIBLY!"

There really is such an article. With photos.

Wow.


ETA - You gotta read the original ... comedy gold.

[shadron]

Skepbitch (http://skepbitch.wordpress.com/2009/07/02/ghost-hunting-can-be-a-real-pain-in-the-ass/) has an excellent review of ghost hunter Maryanna Chatelaine Moresby's article
"Sex after ghost hunting – exorcisms of a womb or anal ghosts: And when is the right time to have sex afterwards?"



A pleasant read.

If its really that much of a problem, then use a cork. If they have to use a hole to get in, close it.

What you worry about when you haven't anything else to worry about, I suppose.

[Phage0070]

And here I thought "anal ghosting" was just another word for skid marks.

[themusicteacher]

And here I thought "anal ghosting" was just another word for skid marks.

I thought it was code for having sex in a very uncomfortable place...

[Big Les]

That really is quite extraordinary.

[Cainkane1]

I'd do it before I went ghost hunting. What self respecting sppok would haunt you if you did that first?

[Rocko]

Some just think it that have been attacked by a ghost or evil spirit, still others know that a real ghost has crawled up their butts. These pesky ghosts are said to cause mad uncontrollable bouts of farting and serious constipation or diarrhea. I can certainly attest to this as it has happened to my husband on more then one occasion. And Felching out ghosts is usually a bigger fear and reality then one might think.

WTF? Felching out a ghost? I really hope that if that's not a typo for "fetching" she's got some good mouthwash to hand.

[Audible Click]

Hah! I have sex while ghost hunting. Adds a whole new meaning to foreplay.

[Jeff Corey]

Wouldn't that be " a hole new meaning to afterplay"?

[Denver]

I foresee a wide-open market in orifice-compatible EMF detectors.

[Emerson Street]

Lol! (after)life imitates porn!

Belladonna already covered this in 'My Ass Is Haunted'.

[Audible Click]

Wouldn't that be " a hole new meaning to afterplay"?

http://forums.randi.org/imagehosting/266624a60ee766940c.gif (http://forums.randi.org/vbimghost.php?do=displayimg&imgid=16982)

[Forum Cat]

Well after so many people are encouraged to "enter the spirit" of things. It seems only fair that the spirits do a little entering of their own.

:)

[jhunter1163]

I foresee a wide-open market in orifice-compatible EMF detectors.

I'm picturing a guy holding a roll of toilet paper saying "There's definitely some EMF fluctuation in my colon. I'm waiting for the printout now."

[JoeyDonuts]

"Ghost Hunting" - New euphemism for the "Shanghai Surprise."

[Uncayimmy]

Wow. This clears up something I've wondered about for years. I once dated a woman who in response to "Who's your daddy?" would say, "What? You can't see him?"

[xXMoshtradamusXx]

Wow. This clears up something I've wondered about for years. I once dated a woman who in response to "Who's your daddy?" would say, "What? You can't see him?"

*shivers*
that is an FML moment.

[Frankenstyle]

I'm off to register spiritplugs.com before someone beats me to it.

[Normal Dude]

Chase some of the links that article has. There is some pretty wacked out stuff in there, like how a male ghost hunter described being engaged in frottage with a male ghost.

[Audible Click]

Chase some of the links that article has. There is some pretty wacked out stuff in there, like how a male ghost hunter described being engaged in frottage with a male ghost.

I learn something new everyday ie the definition of frottage.

[Jeff Corey]

That rubs me the wrong way!

[Steelmage]

That is why you wear protection when you ghost hunt, you do not know what you pick up.

You know, with the believers you think that there is a level when nonsense stops and common sense takes over, but that never seems to happen. It just keeps on going and going.

[Audible Click]

ectoplasmic STD's?

[desertgal]

And here I thought "anal ghosting" was just another word for skid marks.I thought it was code for having sex in a very uncomfortable place...

I thought it was code for ghosting in an incredibly orderly fashion.

[Biscuit]

I heard the newest member of TAPS is going to be a proctologist.

[Doc Daneeka]

Look no further! Maryanna Chatelaine Moresby has treated these common problems in her article Sex after ghost hunting – exorcisms of a womb or anal ghosts: And when is the right time to have sex afterwards?


The funniest part by far is that these are referred to as 'common problems'. That's where I laughed aloud:)

[Cavemonster]

I thought it was code for having sex in a very uncomfortable place...

You mean the back of a Volkswagon?

[Aitch]

You CAN do it in the back of a Mini! :cool:

[skullerello]

Does the article caution would-be ghost-hunters against reproducing, and rearing yet another generation of scam-artlessts?

[shandyjan]

Well after so many people are encouraged to "enter the spirit" of things. It seems only fair that the spirits do a little entering of their own.

:)

:)

Seriously though, it must be the kin dof thing people worry about because they have no worries or something, you read something whackier ever day.

[LightinDarkness]

Oh no, this is just going to give all the girlfriends/wives in the world a new reason to use instead of "I have a headache:"

Now, we're going to hear "Sorry, honey, but I fear I might get possessed by a ghost when I orgasm or that your anus might get possessed by a ghost if we do it."

I mean..who could argue with that? I certainly don't want to risk my anus getting haunted due to sex.

[LightinDarkness]

The more I read the original article on this the more hilarious it gets. I cannot believe someone was being serious when they wrote this.

The recommended cure for ghosts up your butt?

MAGICAL ENEMAS! However...douche's are NOT recommended. You should consult your local "professional" Voo Doo priest for vagina hauntings.

The piece de'la resistance: The author relates how her husband had a anal haunting which resulted in flatulence coming out which sounded out "YOU ARE F*****G DOOMED!"

I cannot stop laughing.

[jhunter1163]

And here I thought talking out of your ass was just a figure of speech.

[Frankenstyle]

However...douche's are NOT recommended.
I cannot stop laughing.

It sounds like they're a little behind the times...

http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/3884/scaryt.jpg

[Shrike]

These pesky ghosts are said to cause mad uncontrollable bouts of farting... From now on I can just claim that it's ghosts doing it. If my wife was gullible....
She knows it's only the ghosts ot taco's consumed.

[Alareth]

In some cultures spicy hot Enemas are said to chase a ghosts from a persons bowels in many cultures wine or beer enemas are used to get the ghost drunk so he will just fall out of the person and it then can be captured and put into a bottle or container for safe keeping. My husband keeps his in a pickle jar in the garage and has gotten several intriguing EVP’s from it.A pickle jar. In the garage.

[Shrike]

A pickle jar. In the garage.
Really, you can't make this stuff up.

[AndyD]

Really, you can't make this stuff up.

Oh, I don't know about that.

[firecoins]

what happens when your having sex with ghosts?

[blue sock monkey]

what happens when your having sex with ghosts?

You wait and wait for them to come...and wait...and wait...

[Mikeuk]

My favourite line is -- quote "One rule is to never ghost hunt when you are horny"

The image "Photo of real anal ghost poking hi shead out of hubby's butt" - the ghost has a rather square head and looks excatly like the reflection of a flash gun in glass - odd that?

Thanks Skepbitch for best laugh had in a while..

[Marduk]

I hear that you can exorcise spirits from your cavities by manufacturing a plug out of ginger root, the plug when inserted has to stay in place for 20 minutes to ensure success

can someone try it and let me know how they get on ?
:D

[Audible Click]

I hear that you can exorcise spirits from your cavities by manufacturing a plug out of ginger root, the plug when inserted has to stay in place for 20 minutes to ensure success

can someone try it and let me know how they get on ?
:D

Or off? :D

[NoZed Avenger]

I have not read the article, but from the posted excerpts, I have to question whether this is a parody.

Call me overly optimistic if you will, but this seems a little too far out there.

[Big Les]

No, you're right. It has to be.

[1badkitty]

If the voice from his anus was not enough when it grabbed the sheets and starting pulling it inside him! I was petrified and chilled to the bone, ready to run for the hills.(quoting from article)

:jaw-dropp:eek: So why didn't she run? What person in their right mind would want to remain in the same bed with someone whose ass swears at them,emits inhumane oders, and then begins to eat the bedsheets??? Farts are horrible enough. But if someone's ass starts cussing and eating bedsheets, then it's time to leave!

[Epok]

Hah! I have sex while ghost hunting. Adds a whole new meaning to foreplay.
I have always wanted an encounter with a Succubus. Do you have to worry about using protection or getting Psi STDs from them. How come ghost hunters never answer the truly important questions?

[Audible Click]

I have always wanted an encounter with a Succubus. Do you have to worry about using protection or getting Psi STDs from them. How come ghost hunters never answer the truly important questions?

Ha Ha?

[Epok]

I know how ya feel Audible. I sometimes confuse myself.

[arthwollipot]

I think this thread is the funniest thing I have read in ages. Thanks, folks. I think I'll refrain from checking the links until I get home though.