Altar kills man who came to give thanks

[Questioninggeller]

A religious man was killed by a 860 pound altar in Vienna, Austria as he prayed:


Man killed in church after stone altar falls on him
Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/austria/6166852/Man-killed-in-church-after-stone-altar-falls-on-him.html)
Published: 10:53AM BST 10 Sep 2009

Gunther Link, a devout Catholic, prayed to be saved after he was trapped in a lift – but was killed when he went to church to give thanks and the stone altar fell on him.
...
Roman Hahslinger, a police spokesman, said: "He was a very religious man and had been scared when he was trapped in the lift and had prayed for release.

"A short while later he was pulled out of the elevator and he went straight to the church to thank God.

"He seems to have embraced a stone pillar on which the stone altar was perched and it fell on him, killing him instantly.
...

Full: Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/austria/6166852/Man-killed-in-church-after-stone-altar-falls-on-him.html)

[Pure Argent]

Wow.

Fail.

[sphenisc]

I've seen Final Destination - who else was in the lift?

[scratchy]

Well, you know what they say... God hears all prayers, and sometimes the answer is no.

[JoeTheJuggler]

Proof that God is not all-powerful! If he were, he'd have gotten the guy on his first attempt to kill him in the elevator.

[Cainkane1]

Well I'm not a believer but I'm still sorry this happened to him.

[EeneyMinnieMoe]

This entire story sounds like a pure urban legend. O. Henry might have made it up.

Can't believe that actually happened.

Actually happened.

Edit: I've been trapped in an elevator. It is not miraculous to be released from one. At all. I don't know about God in general but I know that I when I was released from the elevator, it was thanks to the super of the building and the cops.

[Wolfman]

You bunch of arrogant fools! Why assume that he was praying to thank god for saving him?

Scenario: A man living a life of quiet desperation, wanting to die, but lacking the courage to take his own life. Then, it happens...he's trapped in an elevator, and believes he is going to die. The relief and calm that settle over him are the first real peace that he's felt in years. He's ready to leave this life, with all its pain and anguish, behind.

Then those bastard rescuers come and snatch him from the jaws of death. Desperation crushes him even worse than before, after having experienced that sense of escape that near-death brought to him. He realizes that he cannot face life any more...that he needs death, he craves it.

He rushes to the church, throwing himself prostate at the foot of the altar, begging god to end his miserable existence. Sobs wrack his body as he clings to a stone pillar.

And god, looking down on this poor, suffering soul, takes mercy on him and answers his prayer. The column shifts, the altar falls, and the man finally finds the escape that he's craved for so long.

This could, in fact, be one of the strongest proofs of the existence of god that I've ever heard of.

[Puppycow]

So God does have a sense of humor.
:iblamelisa:

[SphereGuy]

I never get involved in altarcations.

[JoeTheJuggler]

I think maybe the guy had just been reading Judges 14:15-30 and felt inspired.

[JoeTheJuggler]

You bunch of arrogant fools! Why assume that he was praying to thank god for saving him?

Well mostly because in the article, the police spokesman said, "A short while later he was pulled out of the elevator and he went straight to the church to thank God."

[JoeTheJuggler]

I never get involved in altarcations.

Next thing you'll say is that this guy was a pillar of the community.

[laca]

I've seen Final Destination - who else was in the lift?

And most importantly in what order did they get rescued?

[laca]

Well, you know what they say... God hears all prayers, and sometimes the answer is no.

No no, the prayer got answered. This was the "thank you note". Maybe some kid got in distress somewhere in the meantime and god already used up its allotted prayers for that day so he kind of did an undo there...

[JoeTheJuggler]

Well. . . since modern elevators (like since the late 19th century) have safety features that make it almost certain that the car will not plummet (more than say 10 feet), he wasn't really at risk of dying while he was stuck in the elevator. So, while being stuck in an elevator for some hours can be distressing to someone with mild claustrophobia (someone with strong claustrophobia probably wouldn't be able to get in the elevator to begin with), it's not really a life-threatening situation. More of an inconvenience.

Maybe God got really ticked-off for being disturbed over such a minor thing.

[Marduk]

So God does have a sense of humor.
:iblamelisa:

YES
http://blog.taragana.com/n/church-roof-collapse-kills-seven-in-brazil-28/
SAO PAULO - The collapse of the roof at a church here Sunday night killed at least seven people, authorities said.

[SphereGuy]

I guess the elevator failed to lift his spirits, so god had to.

[Steelmage]

Oh, irony.

[Third Eye Open]

You bunch of arrogant fools! Why assume that he was praying to thank god for saving him?

Scenario: A man living a life of quiet desperation, wanting to die, but lacking the courage to take his own life. Then, it happens...he's trapped in an elevator, and believes he is going to die. The relief and calm that settle over him are the first real peace that he's felt in years. He's ready to leave this life, with all its pain and anguish, behind.

Then those bastard rescuers come and snatch him from the jaws of death. Desperation crushes him even worse than before, after having experienced that sense of escape that near-death brought to him. He realizes that he cannot face life any more...that he needs death, he craves it.

He rushes to the church, throwing himself prostate at the foot of the altar, begging god to end his miserable existence. Sobs wrack his body as he clings to a stone pillar.

And god, looking down on this poor, suffering soul, takes mercy on him and answers his prayer. The column shifts, the altar falls, and the man finally finds the escape that he's craved for so long.

This could, in fact, be one of the strongest proofs of the existence of god that I've ever heard of.

Nominated! :D

[FreshHat]

O,'tis a sad story!

[Andrew Wiggin]

He should have been more careful about who he was praying to. Sounds like he accidentally prayed to the god of the old testement, the vengeful and cruel one, when he SHOULD have been praying to the new testement 'warm and fuzzy' god, he of 'Catholicism WOW!' and 'Buddy Christ'

Ooops. Won't make that mistake again.

A

[hamelekim]

Well I'm not a believer but I'm still sorry this happened to him.

Well, depending on what his Views were on Jesus and salvation his death isn't a sad thing, it's a wonderful thing as he is now with God.

[Twiler]

Well, depending on what his Views were on Jesus and salvation his death isn't a sad thing, it's a wonderful thing as he is now with God.

So, if it transpires that the altar fell because some had arranged that it should do so, and that they did so because they thought his death was a wonderful thing, would that be a good deed? Would you approve?

[ugot2bekidding]

You bunch of arrogant fools! Why assume that he was praying to thank god for saving him?

Scenario: A man living a life of quiet desperation, wanting to die, but lacking the courage to take his own life. Then, it happens...he's trapped in an elevator, and believes he is going to die. The relief and calm that settle over him are the first real peace that he's felt in years. He's ready to leave this life, with all its pain and anguish, behind.

Then those bastard rescuers come and snatch him from the jaws of death. Desperation crushes him even worse than before, after having experienced that sense of escape that near-death brought to him. He realizes that he cannot face life any more...that he needs death, he craves it.

He rushes to the church, throwing himself prostate at the foot of the altar, begging god to end his miserable existence. Sobs wrack his body as he clings to a stone pillar.

And god, looking down on this poor, suffering soul, takes mercy on him and answers his prayer. The column shifts, the altar falls, and the man finally finds the escape that he's craved for so long.

This could, in fact, be one of the strongest proofs of the existence of god that I've ever heard of.

Or...perhaps his wife was less than pleased that he was rescued from the elevator (Life insurance, wife beating, etc.) and she launched her own prayer. :D

[NoZed Avenger]

A little lesson for the others in the congregation:
Maybe he simply should have put some money in the collection box.

[FramerDave]

Wow, and we thought Darwin was tough.

[Polaris]

O,'tis a sad story!

Wow. Anybody else get that?

[Olowkow]

Well, depending on what his Views were on Jesus and salvation his death isn't a sad thing, it's a wonderful thing as he is now with God.
I'm sure the company that installed the altar would love to have you on their side when the lawsuits are filed. Don't you think physics and negligence played any role in this?

[tsig]

Don't you think physics and negligence played any role in this?

Merely tools in god's hands.:p

[Eddie Dane]

This looks like the handiwork of the goddess Nemesis (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nemesis_%28mythology%29).

She likes to kill with an ironic twist.

Very Tarantino-avant-le-lettre, if you think about it.

Remind me to sacrifice a bull to her holiness this weekend.
I need this kind of retribution, like I need...uh...being crushed by an altar, actually.