It's Bible bread!

[TimCallahan]

I just got back from our local Trader Joe's, where I happened to see a certain food item that I've seen before. This particular item has amused me for some time as a prime example of the misapprehension of biblical verse. Specifically, the product is called Ezekiel 4:9 Bread, because it's made of the stuff specified by God for Ezekiel to use in the verse in question (Ezek. 4:9a):

"And you, take wheat and barley, beans and lentils, millet and spelt, and put them into a single vessel, and make bread with them. . . ."

Well now, that certainly seems like a nutritious bread. Not only is it multigrain (wheat, barley, millet and spelt), but it also has balanced protein because its grains are paired with legumes (beans and lentils). Considering that God has told Ezekiel to make and eat such a bread, this would seem to indicate the scientific and nutritional soundness of the Bible; hence, it inhances the argument that the Bible was divinely inspired.

However, there's one big problem here: God is literally ordering Ezekiel to make and eat unclean food. The reason is that Ezekiel is participating in a sort of perfomance art to demonstrate to the erring people of Judah the terrible things that are going to befall them in captivity in Babylon.

Since this admittedly nutritious bread doesn't contain pork, which could be considered unclean because of the animals' unsanitary habits; rabbit, unclean because rabbits eat their own feces; or shellfish, unclean because of possible toxicity or just because their buggy or boneless yucky things; one might wonder what's unclean about it. The problem, for the Levitical dietary laws is that things are only pure when they are unmixed. Thus, mixtures of different grains, or worse, grains and legumes, were, by virtue of being mixed, impure. (Mules, by being the offspring of two different species, were also impure, even to ride.) When God tells Ezekiel to put all these diverse items in a single vessel, it would have been shocking to the people of Judah.

So, perhaps the makers of "Ezekiel 4:9" bread ought to rename it "Unclean" bread. I'd be interested to hear if anyone else has come across similar misapprehensions o biblical verse, amusng and otherwise.

[HansMustermann]

You know, now you're making me want to buy some :p

[grayman]

I wonder how a BBQ pork sandwich with this bread would taste.

[Lisa Simpson]

I wonder how a BBQ pork sandwich with this bread would taste.

Mmm...blasphemous.

[Eyeron]

I'd be curious to try this bread.

[Hux]

You don't get out much do you?

[kedo1981]

Is it baked with POOP?

[Alice Shortcake]

Is it baked with POOP?

Damn, you beat me to it! :rolleyes:

[Malerin]

Mmm...blasphemous.

Sacrilicious!

[John Jones]

Sacrilicious!

I love it!

[TimCallahan]

You know, now you're making me want to buy some :p

Actually, despite all the nutritious stuff in it, it's kind of crappy. As I recall, it was rather tasteless.

[kurious_kathy]

Actually, despite all the nutritious stuff in it, it's kind of crappy. As I recall, it was rather tasteless.

All I have to say is this...

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' " Matt 4:4

[kuroyume0161]

God speaks in hamburgers? ;0)

[Pure Argent]

All I have to say is this...

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' " Matt 4:4

Wow. Way to interject something totally off-topic for the chance to preach again.

[JenseitsDavon]

All I have to say is this...

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' " Matt 4:4

Y'know, Kathy, you'd have a lot more success* here if you'd actually have a conversation for once. Maybe talk about the award your kid won at school for baking bread. Or talk about how happy you are with the car you just bought. Instead, what we hear from you sounds a lot like the while noise on the radio, "I'maJesusBotI'maJesusBotI'maJesusBot". Hence, we ignore you. Act like a human and be treated as such.






*Be yelled at a lot less.

[fromdownunder]

All I have to say is this...

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' " Matt 4:4

So, I should live on bread, the word of God and nothing else. Pretty boring diet. I'll stick to my Pork, Bacon, Ham, Oysters, Mussells and Crayfish regardless of what the Bible says.

Norm.

[TimCallahan]

All I have to say is this...

Jesus answered, "It is written: 'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' " Matt 4:4

You see, Kathy, my point here is that the folks who came up with Ezekiel 4:9 bread got the interpretation of the verse wrong. God isn't telling Ezekiel to make this bread because of its nutritional value, which is what those marketing the bread apparently thought. He was telling him to do something that so violated the dietary purity laws that it would offend and shock the Jewish people. It was sort of a performance art wake-up call.

So, what this thread is about is the commercialization of biblical verses by people who have missed the point. If there is a God, I would live in the hope that he's not into marketing.

Since we're coming into the Holiday Season, let me share another rather amusing anecdote, though I'm afraid I must do it second-hand. A friend of mine, while I was in the animation industry, told me of working in Tokyo during the Christmans season. The Japanese are really into religious syncretism, having both Buddhist and Shinto shrines and being taken by the pomp of Christian weddings. Of course the commercialism of Christmas is quite attractive to Japanese department stores.

What my friednd saw while working in Tokyo was a department store display window featuring a manger scene. Among those adoring the Christ child were . . . the Seven Dwarves!

[Gayle]

The cinnamon raisin Ezekiel bread is pretty good if it's toasted. If the message on the Ezekiel bread causes you alarm, I suggest you move on to the label for Dr. Bonner's Liquid Magic Castile Soap. It'll keep you jumping for a month.

[grayman]

I know Jesus. He makes tortillas.

[Elizabeth I]

I know Jesus. He makes tortillas.

And sometimes appears on them.

[bruto]

If you haven't read Paul Theroux's Millroy the Magician perhaps you should.

[Hux]

It must just be me. I thought Kathy's contribution was timely and, by being entirely inappropriate, hilarious.

[kedo1981]

It’s things like this that reinforce the fact that “people of faith” are really just infantile dupes, falling for any BS that includes the words BIBLE or JESUS, bible bread, Sarah Palin, the bible code.

[paiute]

I just got back from our local Trader Joe's, where I happened to see a certain food item that I've seen before. This particular item has amused me for some time as a prime example of the misapprehension of biblical verse. Specifically, the product is called Ezekiel 4:9 Bread, because it's made of the stuff specified by God for Ezekiel to use in the verse in question (Ezek. 4:9a):

The logical use for this bread

http://hackaday.com/2009/06/23/the-holy-toaster-kit/

[Maia]

Ack! I meant to get this bread at Harris-Teeter today in the freezer section and forgot. (It's really very good... especially if you can't stand that squishy kind of bread...) ;)

[TimCallahan]

The cinnamon raisin Ezekiel bread is pretty good if it's toasted. If the message on the Ezekiel bread causes you alarm, I suggest you move on to the label for Dr. Bonner's Liquid Magic Castile Soap. It'll keep you jumping for a month.

Adding cinnamon and raisins to the mix? Now that's really impure! The meassage of Ezekiel 4:9 bread doesn't alarm me. It amuses me, though I do wonder, now that I think of it, if some dietary craze is going to come out of misreading Exodus and Numbers, such as the all-manna diet.

I assume what you are referring to with respect to Dr. Bronner's Magic Soap has to do with the "one God, shepherd Isreal" bit. Well, they say "Cleanliness is next to godliness." Was that originally a Puritan dictum?

Thinking about all this reminds of o this one bit in the early Woody Allen film "Bananas," a tv ad for new "Testament" cigarettes.

[madurobob]

The cinnamon raisin Ezekiel bread is pretty good if it's toasted. If the message on the Ezekiel bread causes you alarm, I suggest you move on to the label for Dr. Bonner's Liquid Magic Castile Soap. It'll keep you jumping for a month.

The label is crazy, but the soap is unbeatable! Get the almond, not the peppermint.

When my bronchitis is acting up I take long, steamy showers to help. I time the shower by reading the complete Dr Bronner's label.

All One! All One! All One!

Oh, and there is (was?) a Dr Bronner's food product, too ("liquid Protein" or something like that. A sort of soy sauce). I was alarmed the first time I found this out by reading a recipe from my mother that said to add two tablespoons of Dr Bronners. I called and asked what flavor and did I really have to use soap in the soup.

[TimCallahan]

The label is crazy, but the soap is unbeatable! Get the almond, not the peppermint.

When my bronchitis is acting up I take long, steamy showers to help. I time the shower by reading the complete Dr Bronner's label.



It must be the hemp.

[Fnord]

I wonder how a BBQ pork sandwich with this bread would taste.
Not bad, actually. Ezekiel 4:9 is my favorite brand of bread. Their website (http://www.foodforlife.com/sprouted-grain-difference/ezekiel-4-9.html) claims, "Ezekiel 4:9® Bread, made from freshly sprouted organically grown grains, is naturally flavorful and bursting with nutrients. Rich in protein, vitamins, minerals and natural fiber with no added fat. Try it served warm to release its exceptionally rich nutty flavor."

It's like a coarse-grained light rye with little crunchy bits. I like it.

[madurobob]

It must be the hemp.

Well I...

You can't prove...

Got any Doritos?

Oh, you mean in the soap!

Yeah, adding that was pure marketing and politics. The company added hemp oil to all their soaps along with a big "now with hemp oil!" on the label immediately after the death of Dr Bronner (I assume he was against it). It didn't change the soap one way or the other as far as I could tell, but it certainly appealed to the hippie hemp proponents.

[jasonpatterson]

The cinnamon raisin Ezekiel bread is pretty good if it's toasted. If the message on the Ezekiel bread causes you alarm, I suggest you move on to the label for Dr. Bonner's Liquid Magic Castile Soap. It'll keep you jumping for a month.

I have no problem with the product, but Dr. Bronner's label is absolutely insane. The guy had some serious mental problems (for real, not just diagnosing from his writing) and his writing is strikingly similar to that of the TimeCube guy. Here's an excerpt:
"The 2nd Coming of God’s Law! Mohammed’s Arabs, 1948, found Israel Essene Scrolls & Einstein’s “Hillel” prove that as no 6-year-old can grow up free with the ABC, so certain can no 12-year-old survive free without the Moral ABC mason, tent, & sandalmaker Rabbi Hillel taught carpenter Jesus to unite all mankind free in our Eternal Father’s great All-One-God- Faith! For we’re All-One or none: “Listen Children Eternal Father Eternally One!”" Dr Bronner - Peppermint Castille Soap

All of the labels. (http://www.drbronner.com/dr_bronners_philosophy.html)

[Beerina]

Mmmmm, Nutraloaf (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nutraloaf).

[Geek Goddess]

They make cereal as well


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