The Whacko's are Coming!

[corplinx]

I checked my mail today to find a flyer from some doomsday christian woo-woos. "Amazing Facts Prophecy Seminar" is coming to Cordova TN near me to preach their misinterpretation of non-prophetic old testament books and their fear/blame combo theology.

From the flyer:

"learn the real truth about aids"
"A crystal clear revelation of who and what the Antichrist is"
"A Relic Discovered From the Garden of Eden. It may change your convictions"
"Amazing Discoveries in the City of the Dead. Thousands of Atheists are becoming born-again Christians because of the evidence."

It says it is free to attend and I am guessing it will get its money like self-help seminars do. Each night's sermon will basically pitch the books/videos/audio tapes at the tables.

These guys are going to be doing these sermons for what looks like 3 weeks also so that friends can bring back friends (which I am guessing will be heavily encouraged).

It sickens me that "Amazing Facts" got to send me this as Non-Profit org through the mail.

[thaiboxerken]

Make sure you keep your kids at home that night and a gun at your side.

[corplinx]

Actually I am thinking of standing out in front of the place with a poster of some sort the first night they do this. Of course, my permit will be in my back pocket and John Moses Browning will be under my stylish fleece pullover.

[justsaygnosis]

God: Moses what are you doing back up here?

Moses:There's been a slight problem.

God:What's the problem?

Moses:Don't joke w/me you already know.

God:I want to see if you come up with the right answer.

Moses:Answer to what?

God:Your problem.

Moses:If I knew the answers to my problems I probably wouldn't be up here right now, now would I?

God:Don't push it Mo. If I can write on stone tablets I can tatoo your ass severely.

Moses:The tablets!!! That's the problem. When I got down w/the tablets the turncoats were worshipping a golden cow so I lost it and shattered the tablets. Then I melted the cow and Josh and the boys went and kicked some serious ass.

God:Why didn't you put the tablets down, kick some ass and then melt the cow?

Moses:Well, It was really shiny. I guess I caught gold fever for a minute or two.

God:Moses that's idolatry and that's not allowed.

Moses:At least it was a kosher idol. It's not like they sold out completely and forged a pig. After all the gold originally belonged to the Egyptians. We pillaged them on the way out, remember?, you told us to.

God:Enough for the cow. Do you have any idea what you've done smashing the tablets?

Moses:Aren't you going to make some more?

God:NO!!!

Moses: Why NOt?

God:Because those were originals in my own handwriting. Years from now they could have been brought in for handwriting analysis and everyone would know my true personality.
You blew it Mo so now you have to take dictation and carve the commandments yourself. Several thousand years from now there's going to be a great neurologist named Sigmund Freud and he's going to open up maps to the workings of the subconscious. Aside from that he's going to remind people that what they get for free they seldom value even if what they have is priceless so it's best to make them work for it.That's why you're going to carve the stone. Then you won't be so careless.
Of course there'll be a down side to this and people will seek out highly publicized con artists who will pose as sooth sayers.

Moses:You mean like the diviners and astrologers we left behind in Egypt.

God:Much worse than that, they'll have television, they'll be able to advertise themselves across the entire world.

Moses:They'll be like prophets!!!What can be done???

God:I'm going to bring forth a race of people who don't believe in anything that they can't sensibly prove through science.

Moses:What about blind faith?

God:The needs of the many outwiegh the needs of the few or the one...even me.....sigh!!!

[Smalso]

When I see advertisements for crap like this, my first impulse is to run outside and make sure my car is locked.

[scribble]

http://www.revelationtoday.com/

[corplinx]

revelation today is connected to Amazing Facts who is running this seminar. The hitman they are sending in is named Verne Snow though.

The flyer also mentions UFOs and Jean Dixon.

[MRC_Hans]

How can Bible prophecies be amazing news? I mean, they've been around for anybody to read for about 2000 years?

Hans

[Akots]

*Searches through bible*

No bibliography. How suspicious...

[Nova Land]

Originally posted by corplinx
I checked my mail today to find a flyer from some doomsday christian woo-woos. "Amazing Facts Prophecy Seminar" is coming to Cordova TN...
This sounds like Seventh Day Adventist literature.

They are interesting people. If the event is free, you might find it enjoyable entertainment.

A "natural foods" store run by Seventh Day Adventists that we visited frequently a couple of summers ago (to drop off organic blueberries that we had raked) had a free literature rack, and I collected a number of their books and booklets, including some rather fat anti-evolution paperbacks. (I did not buy any products there, preferring to buy things at regular supermarkets, but I'm always happy to pick up free literature.) While there will likely be many books and tapes for sale at the event, there may be a fair amount of free material available as well.

[Nova Land]

Yep. Just did a quick Google search. You can link to the Amazing Facts web site through the Seventh Day Adventist web site (http://www.adventist.org) or go there directly at Amazing Facts (http://www.amazingfacts.org)

[kourama]

Damn, that sounds neat.

Here in boring, sterile, neat and orderly Toronto all I ever get is pizza coupons and the odd Jehovah's wit(l/n)ess or Mor(m)on.

Maybe I should buy some anti-evolution booklet and see if they put me on a mail list! That would be cool!

[c4ts]

That relic had better be God's own humongous flaming sword He supposedly put there to keep people out, or I won't be convinced that there even is a Garden of Eden, let alone someone who got in and made it out alive.

[Legallee Insane]

I would be very interested to find out just how many suckers get conned into attending these kind of things. Anyone with half a brain should be able to figure out that their peddling cr@p.

Originally posted by corplinx
Actually I am thinking of standing out in front of the place with a poster of some sort the first night they do this. Of course, my permit will be in my back pocket and John Moses Browning will be under my stylish fleece pullover.


So did you?

I doubt it for some reason.

Originally posted by cavin
Hey, Whodini is here....
somebody feed him some happy pills
but we love our wackos, and hey, this forum has gotta eat up a lot of his llloooonnnngggg day.


What on earth are you blabbering about?

I asked corplinx if he actually did stand out in front of the place with a poster of some sort. -Because he posted:


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Actually I am thinking of standing out in front of the place with a poster of some sort the first night they do this. Of course, my permit will be in my back pocket and John Moses Browning will be under my stylish fleece pullover.
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Your amateur tacics, Cavin, hardly phase me. I just wonder whose puppet you are.

Cheers bucko. And next time, remember to stay on topic.