Answering the Door Naked?!

[kevinsbikes]

I am a firm believer that my liberties are only mine when they do not tread on others... Whit this being stated, one day as I was driving home, I saw a couple of Mormons headed toward my neighborhood... and not far behind a gaggle of Jahova's Witnesses. The Atheist in me decided to answer the door buck naked and invite them in. My wife thought this was wrong... adding that by answering the door naked, I was violating their liberties. My question to the forum: Is there anything wrong with answering the door naked? ...and insisting that they come in to discuss the word of their God? Who is right... me or my wife?
One goal was acheived... they didn't want a thing to do with me and almost no time at all was wasted.

Kevin W.

P.S. No, I do not have any jpegs!

[epepke]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes
I am a firm believer that my liberties are only mine when they do not tread on others... Whit this being stated, one day as I was driving home, I saw a couple of Mormons headed toward my neighborhood... and not far behind a gaggle of Jahova's Witnesses. The Atheist in me decided to answer the door buck naked and invite them in. My wife thought this was wrong... adding that by answering the door naked, I was violating their liberties. My question to the forum: Is there anything wrong with answering the door naked? ...and insisting that they come in to discuss the word of their God? Who is right... me or my wife?
One goal was acheived... they didn't want a thing to do with me and almost no time at all was wasted.

Kevin W.

P.S. No, I do not have any jpegs!

I used to do this. It works pretty well.

[Some Friggin Guy]

Legally, you are well within your rights to be naked in your own home. Therefore, you can answer the door naked without it impeding on their liberties. You can even invite them in, but you cannot insist that they come in. They always have the choice to turn down your offer.

[Iacchus]

Maybe you would have looked better in women's underwear?

Well, it would have been a little less offensive anyway. ;)

[Monketey Ghost]

Originally posted by Some Friggin Guy
Legally, you are well within your rights to be naked in your own home. Therefore, you can answer the door naked without it impeding on their liberties. You can even invite them in, but you cannot insist that they come in. They always have the choice to turn down your offer.

This doesn't seem right to me... what if you were to build a huge glass wall onto the front of your home, and go naked all the time?

I don't think you're actually legally allowed to answer the door nude, as you are opening the door and hence inviting a look inside.

[pgwenthold]

Originally posted by No Answers

I don't think you're actually legally allowed to answer the door nude, as you are opening the door and hence inviting a look inside.

"Inviting a look inside"?

No. When they knock on the door, they are asking for a look inside (if they just wanted to talk, they could phone). You are allowing them to look inside.

It's your house. They are the ones who want to see you. By opening the door, you are letting them.

[Zero]

Originally posted by pgwenthold


"Inviting a look inside"?

No. When they knock on the door, they are asking for a look inside (if they just wanted to talk, they could phone). You are allowing them to look inside.

It's your house. They are the ones who want to see you. By opening the door, you are letting them. So long as you weren't visible from anywhere outside of your property, you are probably in the clear legally. I usually prefer snagging a beer and popping in a porn tape...:D

[pgwenthold]

Originally posted by Zero
So long as you weren't visible from anywhere outside of your property, you are probably in the clear legally.

Well, assuming that they are standing in front of the door when you open it, we can count on the JWs to block the view. Of course, when they turn to run you need to close the door quickly...

[Fade]

Put up a No Soliciting sign outside your house. I have a rather *large* TV (54 inch gas plasma) that is facing the way you come into my home. So I have gay porn ready for anyone that doesn't follow the signs simple instructions.

[ReasonableDoubt]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes
My question to the forum: Is there anything wrong with answering the door naked? ...and insisting that they come in to discuss the word of their God? Who is right... me or my wife?
One goal was acheived... they didn't want a thing to do with me and almost no time at all was wasted.I hope that you teach your children better manners. Disagreeing with someone is insufficient license for disrespect.

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by Zero
I usually prefer snagging a beer and popping in a porn tape...:D

Zero, Zero, Zero,
Why give a jerk like me more fuel for the fire?! This one just may be over the top for my wife though.

Kevin

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by ReasonableDoubt
I hope that you teach your children better manners. Disagreeing with someone is insufficient license for disrespect.

Reasonable Doubt... I would never do this while my children were at home. I just have a real beef with "Door to Door Testimonials." I don't go to their door and say, "Have you heard the words of the Amazing Randi... Please log onto randi.org for more words from my god." Don't get me wrong... I do appreciate the concern for children learning respect. I try everyday.

Kevin W.

[Skeptic]

Do what I do. As they go into their spiel, I answer in a modest tone, "I'm sorry, but I just don't give a damn about God, Jesus, or the afterlife."

They have no answer to that. They just go away in bug-eyed, slack-jawed dibelief.

[Bikewer]

I did it once, to Jehovah's witnesses. Worked quite well.

You'd be well advised to make sure the annoying zealots don't have any children along....

In most states, it's not "lewd & lascivious" unless you're ah, "touching" yourself. Nudity can be illegal in public, of course, but in your own home?

I had it in mind to make up a plaque with this bit of doggerel I wrote:

All evangelists beware,
This is a Secular Humanist lair.
I have no soul to be saving,
So please spare me your bible raving.
Religion is an awful bore,
So keep your knuckles from my door!

Never got around to it though...

[neutrino_cannon]

I belive ways to deal with Jehovah's Witnesses have been discussed here plenty of times for you to get better ideas then a simple full monty at the door.

The best ones involved animal sacrifice and S&M.

Puerile and counterproductive in the extreme, to be sure.

I would never do such things;)

[ReasonableDoubt]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes
Reasonable Doubt... I would never do this while my children were at home. I just have a real beef with "Door to Door Testimonials." Nice dance.

You initially asked: "Is there anything wrong with answering the door naked?" Apparently, we both know such actions are childish and disrespectful? That you would never want your children to act the way you might seems to suggest the answer to your question. No?

By the way, I'm what some might refer to as a "hard-ass" atheist. I've never had these people treat me with anything other than respect.

Finally, as for your story about "a couple of Mormons headed toward my neighborhood... and not far behind a gaggle of Jahova's Witnesses.", it has all the qualities of a fabrication, presented to allow you to offer your suggested response.

My suggestion - grow up.

[Bikewer]

Although such evangelism seems to have abated in my neighborhood, 20 years ago it was a rather common occurence to have Jehova's Witnesses, Mormons, or other unspecified Christian groups going door to door.

For a change of pace, you'd get the magazine subscription peddlers, some of whom were annoying indeed.

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by ReasonableDoubt
Nice dance.


Finally, as for your story about "a couple of Mormons headed toward my neighborhood... and not far behind a gaggle of Jahova's Witnesses.", it has all the qualities of a fabrication, presented to allow you to offer your suggested response.

My suggestion - grow up.

To the contrary Reasonable doubt... it is not fabricated. Being that you don't know me and are rude as hell, let me tell you that while you are a "hard ass atheist", I am a hard ass Veteran of the United States Marine Corps. Where integrity is still a core value and very dear to my heart. I joined this forum for fun 'typed' conversation and a "non-hostile" environment to discuss issues/topics that offend many religious folk. If the majority of the members of JREF forum are remotely as rude as you, I may stop participating. As far as the naked door answering, I had a blast with that day and thought that I should share it with someone other than my best friend being that the panel may have appreciated it... even if at an infantile level.
For the future, obviously, you feel as though you are superior in intelect than the panel or at least me... so, please do yourself a favor and don't even bother reading my started topics or posts. You just can't handle the fun and that is sad.

Please reserve negative and Rude comment toward me to Private Messages... that would be much more "grown up" and better received by me. Thank you

Kevin W.

[Andonyx]

Originally posted by ReasonableDoubt


My suggestion - grow up.

My suggestion, why don't you worry less about what other people do, and worry more about not being a jackass.

First, your comment back to Fade is completely your own attempt to put forth your opinions wihout any regard to the conversation that took place. Fade already mentioned that he has a "no solicitors" sign. If someone shows up at his door, ignoring his sign, then respect has already gone right out the window. They have shown Fade none, and he owes them none.

Second, for some reason you believe it's important to show all others what you consider respectful behavior even when you disagree with them.

Then like a freaking genius, you march into this discussion, mouth wide open telling everyone else they are wrong and they should grow up, because you disagree with them about how to handle a situation.

So unless this is some grand attempt at ironic humor you've pretty much succeeded only in coming off like a loud-mouthed, self-involved a**hole.

[RussDill]

I always thought a cute little sign that says "warning, solicitors may get wet" like they have at sea world would be good.

[EdipisReks]

Originally posted by ReasonableDoubt
Nice dance.

You initially asked: "Is there anything wrong with answering the door naked?" Apparently, we both know such actions are childish and disrespectful? That you would never want your children to act the way you might seems to suggest the answer to your question. No?

By the way, I'm what some might refer to as a "hard-ass" atheist. I've never had these people treat me with anything other than respect.

Finally, as for your story about "a couple of Mormons headed toward my neighborhood... and not far behind a gaggle of Jahova's Witnesses.", it has all the qualities of a fabrication, presented to allow you to offer your suggested response.

My suggestion - grow up.

:v:

[Jas]

Answering the door naked....hmmmm....some of those Mormons are pretty hot. I should try that next time.....;)

[Flaherty]

Answering the door naked violates standards of common decency, especially when a simple and fully clothed "No thank you" would have accomplished the same end. I would say you were wrong to take that approach.

On the other hand, you did give them a story to tell for the rest of their lives, so maybe it wasn't such an ungenerous thing to do.

[pgwenthold]

Originally posted by Flaherty
Answering the door naked violates standards of common decency, especially when a simple and fully clothed "No thank you" would have accomplished the same end. I would say you were wrong to take that approach.


I think the point is that it is not all that much more indecent than knocking on some random person's door in order to preach to them about your religion.

Now, if you want to argue that two wrongs don't make a right, that is one thing. But to claim that you shouldn't do it because it isn't common decency misses the whole point.

[c4ts]

Just tell them you're not home. They'll understand.

[Flaherty]

Originally posted by pgwenthold


I think the point is that it is not all that much more indecent than knocking on some random person's door in order to preach to them about your religion.

Now, if you want to argue that two wrongs don't make a right, that is one thing. But to claim that you shouldn't do it because it isn't common decency misses the whole point.

I think it hits on the point exactly. The door-2-door bible thumpers are being rude, but in the realm of decency that does not give license to be rude back to them. Say "No thanks," shut the door, and the incident is over. It's as simple as that.

We ought to be better than them in that even if they are rude to us, we will not be rude to them. There is enough rudeness in society that we don't need to add to it.

[ehobbs]

Originally posted by Flaherty


I think it hits on the point exactly. The door-2-door bible thumpers are being rude, but in the realm of decency that does not give license to be rude back to them. Say "No thanks," shut the door, and the incident is over. It's as simple as that.

We ought to be better than them in that even if they are rude to us, we will not be rude to them. There is enough rudeness in society that we don't need to add to it.

Agreed.. Also, how do you tell a "couple of Mormons" from "a gaggle of Jehovah's Witness'"? How did you know which was which?

And are you sure it's not a 'flock' instead of a 'gaggle'?

Ed

[Ignatius]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes


To the contrary Reasonable doubt... it is not fabricated. Being that you don't know me and are rude as hell, let me tell you that while you are a "hard ass atheist", I am a hard ass Veteran of the United States Marine Corps. Where integrity is still a core value and very dear to my heart. I joined this forum for fun 'typed' conversation and a "non-hostile" environment to discuss issues/topics that offend many religious folk. If the majority of the members of JREF forum are remotely as rude as you, I may stop participating. As far as the naked door answering, I had a blast with that day and thought that I should share it with someone other than my best friend being that the panel may have appreciated it... even if at an infantile level.
For the future, obviously, you feel as though you are superior in intelect than the panel or at least me... so, please do yourself a favor and don't even bother reading my started topics or posts. You just can't handle the fun and that is sad.

Please reserve negative and Rude comment toward me to Private Messages... that would be much more "grown up" and better received by me. Thank you

Kevin W.

This sounds to me like, "I want to make fun of religious folks without criticism. Don't talk to me if you disagree!"

This is a large enough group that you will find that people disagreeing strongly on just about every issue imaginable (see the Nipplegate threads). This is a good thing.

"...non-hostile environment to discuss issues/topics that offend many religious folk"??????

I just can't get over this line. This isn't an atheist support group where we all validate each others feelings, hand out Victim of the Month awards and then sit down for a hot mocha and a good cry. Sheesh!

Seriously Kevin, I think you will like the combative and contentious nature of this board. I've learned a lot from the people that I disagree with here.

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by Ignatius



This is a large enough group that you will find that people disagreeing strongly on just about every issue imaginable (see the Nipplegate threads). This is a good thing.

"...non-hostile environment to discuss issues/topics that offend many religious folk"??????

I just can't get over this line. This isn't an atheist support group where we all validate each others feelings, hand out Victim of the Month awards and then sit down for a hot mocha and a good cry. Sheesh!

Seriously Kevin, I think you will like the combative and contentious nature of this board. I've learned a lot from the people that I disagree with here.

Point taken... but, seriously, the dude was rude.

[Ignatius]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes


Point taken... but, seriously, the dude was rude.

Yeah, he was a little rude. I've sometimes been a bit rude myself on this board when I was trying to make a point. Keep in mind, though, that you yourself are not exactly going to win the accolades of Miss Manners by showing your ding-a-ling to solicitors.;)

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by Ignatius


Yeah, he was a little rude. I've sometimes been a bit rude myself on this board when I was trying to make a point. Keep in mind, though, that you yourself are not exactly going to win the accolades of Miss Manners by showing your ding-a-ling to solicitors.;)

Is it rude to show the ding-a-ling(?)... after all, the naked body is quite a natural thing. Granted, mine is nothing special ...and besides, back to my initial opinion and post: they knocked on my door, not the other way around. :D

[BigShoeStu]

Well I dig it, Kevin! In fact, if and when I see any "Elders" coming down my street I am going to do what you did, but with a slight twist. Would rubbing mayonayse all over my body then rolling in doghnut sprinkles be taking it a little too far? I'm a big guy. That would take a lot of mayo.

[BigShoeStu]

Crap . . . I forgot the lettuce leaf helmet.

Okay, maybe that would be a little over the top.

[ReasonableDoubt]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes
Point taken... but, seriously, the dude was rude.
This from the proud dad who posts here to champion rude behavior.

You are no doubt referring to the sentence: "My suggestion - grow up." You apparently do not find the idea of exposing yourself at the door a bit puerile. The suggestion stands.

[BigShoeStu]

Originally posted by ReasonableDoubt
. . . "My suggestion - grow up." You apparently do not find the idea of exposing yourself at the door a bit puerile. The suggestion stands.

Of course it's puerile! So what?! Who cares? I am a 32 year-old responsible adult that cracks up when I hear a funny fart and laugh my arse off when someone hides behind a door to scare the crap out of someone else. I find it even funnier if they literally crap themselves. Is there nothing puerile that you find funny? Some of my favorite movies are Dumb and Dumber, King Pin, Something about Mary and Night at the Roxbury. Purile in it's PUeRilEST form. The "frank & beans" caught in a zipper IS funny and so is answering the door naked, be it the Mormons, FedEX or the pizza guy. But hey, maybe that's just me.

I stand beside kevinsbikes and also take offense at your suggestion to "grow up". My suggestion - Grow down.

[tdn]

Originally posted by BigShoeStu
Well I dig it, Kevin! In fact, if and when I see any "Elders" coming down my street I am going to do what you did, but with a slight twist. Would rubbing mayonayse all over my body then rolling in doghnut sprinkles be taking it a little too far? I'm a big guy. That would take a lot of mayo.

I think that is just immoral and wrong. Perhaps you need to grow up. Is this the kind of thing you want to pass on to your children? You dang skeptics and your so-called fact-based rantings are just sicko perverts. Why can't you leave the rest of us alone?

I mean, really. Mayo and sprinkles? Those things don't even go together! Now anchovy paste and breadcrumbs -- there's a winning combination!

[BigShoeStu]

Originally posted by tdn


I mean, really. Mayo and sprinkles? Those things don't even go together! Now anchovy paste and breadcrumbs -- there's a winning combination!

I conceed. You are indeed correct that mayo and sprinkles do not go together. I was going for the effect of looking like a gigantic Krispy Kreme. I didn't take into consideration that the Elders may actually want to TASTE me! Good thinking. I will come up with the extra money to upgrade to full on sugar glaze and sprinkles. Thanks for the tip.

[kevinsbikes]

Originally posted by tdn



I mean, really. Mayo and sprinkles? Those things don't even go together! Now anchovy paste and breadcrumbs -- there's a winning combination!

TDN!!!!! You sir, are a man of genius! Anchovy paste and breadcrumbs... aahhh yes. :D Quite delicious.

[tdn]

Originally posted by kevinsbikes


TDN!!!!! You sir, are a man of genius! Anchovy paste and breadcrumbs... aahhh yes. :D Quite delicious.

Why thank you, sir. The (romaine) lettuce hat completes the ensemble. And when you greet the JWs at the door, shout, at the top of your lungs, "Hail Caesar!" Then offer to grate some parmesian for them.

If you ever wanted to know what JWs look like running away, the mystery will soon be solved. If you ever wanted to know what the inside of a prison cell looks like, do this when Girl Scouts come around selling cookies.