It's Sunday...WHY AREN'T YOU IN CHURCH? [Archive]

Bottle or the Gun

7th March 2004, 10:24 AM

Tell us why on this fine Sabbath, this Day of Rest, the Morn of Renewal of Faith...you are not in your nearest Church praising Jesus? Huh? Why? How come? What's the story?

My reasons:
1) If I want to sit on a hard bench wasting my time I'd go to a San Diego Chargers game.
2) I'm searching for Torrents!

Badger

7th March 2004, 10:39 AM

It's not where I passed out last night, and c'mon! The world is spinning WAYYY too fast for me to move from where I'm sprawled right now. I'd hurl SOOO big!!

Next week for sure, though! I promise.

TheMashiah

7th March 2004, 10:43 AM

If i placed my feet inside the holy sanctity of a church they would melt off.

Bottle or the Gun

7th March 2004, 10:45 AM

Originally posted by TheMashiah
If i placed my feet inside the holy sanctity of a church they would melt off.

Or get burnt by the doorknob Like the defiled priest in 'Salem's Lot'. "Unclean...unclean..."

wollery

7th March 2004, 11:30 AM

If I were going to go pray to the big skydaddy I would have gone on Saturday, as Jesus would have! :)

Although, obviously he wouldn't have prayed to himself. Or would he? My head hurts.:(

Yahweh

7th March 2004, 12:24 PM

We hold our meetings in abandoned warehouses, not churches...

(Too early to go the warehouse, the meeting doesnt start until 11 PM...)

MLynn

7th March 2004, 01:20 PM

Originally posted by Bottle or the Gun
Tell us why on this fine Sabbath, this Day of Rest, the Morn of Renewal of Faith...you are not in your nearest Church praising Jesus? Huh? Why? How come? What's the story?

My reasons:
1) If I want to sit on a hard bench wasting my time I'd go to a San Diego Chargers game.
2) I'm searching for Torrents!
Actually, I did and the feet did not melt off (they probably should have but did not). Sabbath is Saturday (I rested as best I could). Why torrents?

volant

7th March 2004, 01:45 PM

We have EAC meetings today. :)

rachaella

7th March 2004, 03:08 PM

I'm too busy wearing comfortable clothes, making chili, and conferencing with the devil coming up with new ways to convert christians to the dark side.

evildave

7th March 2004, 03:14 PM

Just habit.

sparklecat

7th March 2004, 04:35 PM

I was asleep. My roommates all went, though.

Now we're listening to Christian music... I'd swear they suspect, sometimes.

Zep

7th March 2004, 04:52 PM

Church? What is this "church" thing you speak of?

geni

7th March 2004, 05:08 PM

Originally posted by Zep
Church? What is this "church" thing you speak of?

One of these

http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/1999/pope/bio/papal/link.vatican.jpg

Some Friggin Guy

7th March 2004, 05:41 PM

Zep

7th March 2004, 05:57 PM

Originally posted by geni

One of these

http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/1999/pope/bio/papal/link.vatican.jpg Church? Oh, you mean an extraordinarily over-elaborate shrine for gullible Italians and their followers, filled with art-works stolen...erm, sorry, "donated" by hundreds of foreign governments over the centuries, and run by supposedly celibate guys in kimonos?

OK, where would we put it...

geni

7th March 2004, 06:00 PM

Originally posted by Zep
Church? Oh, you mean an extraordinarily over-elaborate shrine for gullible Italians and their followers, filled with art-works stolen...erm, sorry, "donated" by hundreds of foreign governments over the centuries, and run by supposedly celibate guys in kimonos?

No the heart of a secreat plot that has been cotrolling history for the last to thousand years creating comunism and islam amounst other things (well at least acording to some of the websites I came acroos googleing for that image).

BroodingSkill

7th March 2004, 08:02 PM

Lets see, what did I do, oh yea, I was gonna corrupt a bunch of people, but that seemed to much like work, so I layed around and watched TV and ate potato chips.

Zep

7th March 2004, 08:22 PM

Originally posted by geni
No the heart of a secreat plot that has been cotrolling history for the last to thousand years creating comunism and islam amounst other things (well at least acording to some of the websites I came acroos googleing for that image). Oh, you mean THAT church! Right! I follow you now...

Well, we have that already - it's called Victor Zammit and the Arch-Conspiracy of Randi. It's a big business too. 'Scuse me...

:s2:

Zep

7th March 2004, 08:23 PM

Originally posted by BroodingSkill
Lets see, what did I do, oh yea, I was gonna corrupt a bunch of people, but that seemed to much like work, so I layed around and watched TV and ate potato chips. It's a full life for some...

RandFan

7th March 2004, 08:50 PM

Originally posted by wollery
If I were going to go pray to the big skydaddy I would have gone on Saturday, as Jesus would have! :)

Although, obviously he wouldn't have prayed to himself. Or would he? My head hurts.:( According to scripture he did just that.

Matthew 26:42
He went away again the second time, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done. Who was the Father? God. Who was Christ? God in the flesh? So God in the flesh prays to God (in spirit?) who also happens to be the holy gost and the three of them make up the trinity. A bit Schizoid if you ask me.

Yeah, my head hurts to. But to be honest I talk to myself. I even answer my self at times. Sometimes I don't understand the answer? Question, why did Christ ask himself if he could get out of his pre-ordained task? Was he a little disapointed when he said "no" to himself? I wonder if he harbors any resentment? Oh well, OT (off topic).

I'm sick today. I went last week (first time in nearly 6 years).

RandFan

7th March 2004, 09:00 PM

Originally posted by Some Friggin Guy
It's just not the same since they got rid of the blow and the hookers. Wow, my church gave out guilt and penance. Damn! It figures, I always get in the slowest line at the supermarket to. Wrong church, wrong market line. I should have a capital L tatooed on my forehead.

Murtaugh I think god hates me.

Riggs Hate God back. It works for me.

epepke

8th March 2004, 01:19 AM

Originally posted by Bottle or the Gun
Tell us why on this fine Sabbath, this Day of Rest, the Morn of Renewal of Faith...you are not in your nearest Church praising Jesus? Huh? Why? How come? What's the story?

Well, I slept until 3 PM because I had been up all night fighting with some damn CodeWarrior bug that prevented it from linking Palm OS code properly.

And Sunday isn't the Sabbath. The New Testament says that the Apostles gathered on the day after the Sabbath.

evildave

8th March 2004, 02:20 AM

I remember simply making new Palm projects from scratch in CodeWarrior a couple of times because it just up and decided it wasn't going to compile projects that ran anymore.

Fun days.

Now I'm working on an IDE that is documented and contains messages in pidgin english, behaves kind of like Developer Studio, only utterly bent, and the usual suspects in frustrating little problems, like an integrated 'make' that doesn't scan dependencies right, and a gcc-based compiler that they decided to redefine the rules for AND strip out all the useful warnings and diagnostic tools.

Darat

8th March 2004, 02:51 AM

Originally posted by evildave
I remember simply making new Palm projects from scratch in CodeWarrior a couple of times because it just up and decided it wasn't going to compile projects that ran anymore.

Fun days.

Now I'm working on an IDE that is documented and contains messages in pidgin english, behaves kind of like Developer Studio, only utterly bent, and the usual suspects in frustrating little problems, like an integrated 'make' that doesn't scan dependencies right, and a gcc-based compiler that they decided to redefine the rules for AND strip out all the useful warnings and diagnostic tools.

Didn't know you worked for Microsoft...

Keneke

8th March 2004, 11:33 AM

The late-posting ninja strikes again!

Answer: I was busy making love. No, really.

smalltlalk_2k

8th March 2004, 12:22 PM

I was gonna attend church but on the way I couldn't figure out which one of the 2000+ american denominations of christianity to attend. Then there were all the other god's also... Thor, Zeus, Osiris, Buddha... I didn't want to offend all of them by praying to one of them.

Checkmite

8th March 2004, 12:46 PM

Originally posted by Yahweh
We hold our meetings in abandoned warehouses, not churches...

Hardly a difference. Most new fundy (FUNDY, FUNDY!) churches - new as in "built within the last 6 years" - look very much like warehouses. Welcome to "Outlet o' God"!!!

evildave

8th March 2004, 02:00 PM

Originally posted by Darat

Didn't know you worked for Microsoft...

Heh! Minor correction: a project that requires that IDE I described....

fishbob

9th March 2004, 01:11 AM

I find the concept of church unappealing.

I figure that the folks in church are either delusional or hypocrits.

Not my idea of good company.

rachaella

9th March 2004, 08:13 AM

Originally posted by smalltlalk_2k
I was gonna attend church but on the way I couldn't figure out which one of the 2000+ american denominations of christianity to attend. Then there were all the other god's also... Thor, Zeus, Osiris, Buddha... I didn't want to offend all of them by praying to one of them.

The best solution is really, to make up your own imaginary god. I chose a giant Orange at the center of the Universe. My Orange is equally as plausible as Yahweh!

roger

9th March 2004, 08:33 AM

Because they are a bunch of narrow minded bigots, that's why!

I mean, all I did was torch the previous church and burned it to the ground. And suddenly I'm "not welcome here" anymore. I guess I'm not good enough for those goody two shoes. :mad:

Bottle or the Gun

9th March 2004, 09:08 AM

Originally posted by roger
Because they are a bunch of narrow minded bigots, that's why!

I mean, all I did was torch the previous church and burned it to the ground. And suddenly I'm "not welcome here" anymore. I guess I'm not good enough for those goody two shoes. :mad:

It's their 'Holier Than Thou' attitude they have. Such arrogance. I wonder where they get it.

Checkmite

10th March 2004, 02:04 AM

More on topic, however...I typically spend my Sunday mornings attending Mass at St. Mattress. Occasionally I may go to the Unitarian club.

Upchurch

10th March 2004, 06:59 AM

I'm not IN CHURCH because I'm UP CHURCH.

HA Ha ha ha...

...nevermind

DarkMagician

10th March 2004, 09:56 AM

To busy finding innocents to slaughter.

Bottle or the Gun

14th March 2004, 06:35 AM

14 March 04

Going shopping!

Ladewig

14th March 2004, 08:07 AM

I do intend to go to church today. This afternoon, I will go the natural history museum and perform my sacraments like any good, practicing Darwinist. "In the name of the homo sapiens, and the homo heidelbergensis, and the homo habilis."