"Have you ever taken a stress test?"

[plindboe]

I have been asked this by two women every time I have walked through "Strøget" in Copenhagen. They have always wanted to guide me to some building and show me stuff, but when I have asked they've never specified what it was, so I always said I weren't interested. Last time I got curious and walked with them. I even asked if this was a ploy to sell me something while we were walking towards the building, but she didn't answer. Of course as soon as I entered, I noticed the stacks of Dianetics books lying everywhere.

The "test" involved a so-called electrometer with two cans that I should hold in each hand. She then asked me questions about troubles in my life, and that apparatus was supposed to react. Of course it worked like crap and moved left and right chaotically. I asked her what it measured, if it reacted to my pulse or the sweat in my hands, and she said it reacted to negative thoughts. Really enlightening. I guess they used the thing to impress people about how scientific the whole process were, personally I just found it silly. The last half of the "test" I was constantly smirking like W.Bush does when he's telling some bad news.

Of course it turns out I have troubles in my life, like everyone has, and not surprisingly she has the magical cure which was reading the Dianetics book. The only way I could get out of there was by telling her that I would visit their website and learn about it.

My advice to other danes, when they ask you whether you have ever taken a stress test, just say "yes!" and keep walking. Don't look back, they will pull you in.

[Harlequin]

What if you say you took a test, but it said you were a violent psychopath and because you didn't like the results you killed the two women that were running it? Would they leave you alone then?

[Moose]

I suspect only if he followed through.

[Donks]

Originally posted by plindboe
The only way I could get out of there was by telling her that I would visit their website and learn about it.
I don't get this part, were they physically restraining you somehow?

[Vitnir]

Any competent salesperson can make you feel like a complete jerk if you don't give them money for some crap you know you don't want.

[plindboe]

Originally posted by Donks
I don't get this part, were they physically restraining you somehow?

It's like Vitnir said, they act like sales people. Big smiles and nice behaviour, and even when you have realized it's basically a crazy scientology sect, it's difficult to make yourself utter the words "I'm not interested, goodbye". I'm sure there are people out there good at that stuff, but I'm not one of them. I think you need to be in the situation yourself to realize just how good they are at it.

[Sharon]

Hi Peter

I can well imagine how difficult it was to get away. Like yourself I am not good at getting away to. I suppose I don't like confrontation?Mind you saying that I deal with confrontation every lunch time (lunch time assistant at a school)

Im from the UK and haven't been asked to take the Stress Test so will take your advise and say "Yes I have thanks, big smile" and walk on by as the song goes.

Sharon

[apoger]

"I'm not interested, goodbye"

What! Not interested in improving your life!
Not interested in being all you can be?
Not interested in love and success for you and your family?

Are you telling me you won't spend a paltry $9.95 for an opportunity to cultivate your hidden excellence? That's less than a single movie! Do you always let opportunities pass you by? Perhaps that's part of the problem. Why don't you use this as an opportunity to change? Buying this book can be the first step in your new successful life.

What are you waiting for? Do you have a problem with procrastination? Do you have issues with success? What's stopping you? What's preventing you from doing what you need to do? It's not the money, right? You probably have that much change under the cushions of your couch. It's not that you want to harm yourself, right? No of course not, you want to do the right thing!

Now... will that be cash or charge?


Mu Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

[Nex]

Originally posted by apoger
What! Not interested in improving your life!
Not interested in being all you can be?
Not interested in love and success for you and your family?

...

Now... will that be cash or charge?

Mu Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha

You are way too good at that. Creepy. :eek:


:D

[Ashles]

You can take the test online (http://www.scientology.org/oca.htm) .

Apparently you'd normally have to pay $500 for the privilege.

Hmm, sounds too good to be true...

[Harlequin]

Ashles,

I'd click on your link, but I'm honestly afraid to even let them know my IP!

[rppa]

Be very, very wary of those kooks.

http://www.xenu.net
http://www.scientology-lies.com/

[Donks]

Originally posted by plindboe
It's like Vitnir said, they act like sales people. Big smiles and nice behaviour, and even when you have realized it's basically a crazy scientology sect, it's difficult to make yourself utter the words "I'm not interested, goodbye". I'm sure there are people out there good at that stuff, but I'm not one of them. I think you need to be in the situation yourself to realize just how good they are at it.
Oh man, stay out of Egypt, you'll spend every penny you have.

[HarryKeogh]

here are some more observations of the stress test

http://www.randi.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=50407&highlight=scientology+stress+test

I have a post there that includes the "sales" script. very high pressure stuff.

[Rob Lister]

Originally posted by Donks
Oh man, stay out of Egypt, you'll spend every penny you have.

:dl:

Been there (egypt).

done...er...well...yea...done that (every red cent).

Cheap lesson, overall.

Sometimes rudely walking away without explaination is the least expensive, least rude option. Heck, I didn't even get laid.

[jambo372]

I don't think that stress test works.
I answered the questions and it said I was in an unacceptable state for all categories.

[Rob Lister]

Originally posted by jambo372
I don't think that stress test works.
I answered the questions and it said I was in an unacceptable state for all categories.

Jambo, in your particular case I'd say the test worked perfectly.

But heck, they probably just got lucky

[plindboe]

Thanks for the many replies. I will certainly study up on scientology and dianetics, so I can confront them more effectively the next time I inevitably run into them. I asked her about the electrometer and she showed me books about it, which I told her seemed grossly unscientific, which she even answered "yes" to. I also said that dianetics was considered to be a pseudoscience by actual scientists, which didn't help much since she had no idea what the word meant. That's basically the best I could do, besides smiling and laughing when she preached to me, to show my skepticism. Next time I'll do better.

[Anders W. Bonde]

plindboe,

If it's of any comfort to you, I've been accosted by scientologists in pedestrian streets, too (twice), and both times I proudly told them to f*** off and go could stick their /&%/¤#&# in their &%#¤. Boy, did I enjoy that - they almost looked intimidated!

Not very civil of me, perhaps, but I just don't take kindly to brainwashing, secterian woos that proselyte - and I let them know in no uncertain terms. See, they don't expect that reaction (these didn't anyway) and it threw them completely off guard.

[Ashles]

Originally posted by jambo372
I don't think that stress test works.
I answered the questions and it said I was in an unacceptable state for all categories.
This is why I know you are not a serious poster.

"Jambo" would be ideal fodder for the scientologicts and would be a member right now if he had even vaguely come into contact with them.
"Jambo" believes everything he is told and would love scientology.

"Jambo" is not a convincing character anymore.

[plindboe]

Originally posted by Anders W. Bonde
plindboe,

If it's of any comfort to you, I've been accosted by scientologists in pedestrian streets, too (twice), and both times I proudly told them to f*** off and go could stick their /&%/¤#&# in their &%#¤. Boy, did I enjoy that - they almost looked intimidated!

Not very civil of me, perhaps, but I just don't take kindly to brainwashing, secterian woos that proselyte - and I let them know in no uncertain terms. See, they don't expect that reaction (these didn't anyway) and it threw them completely off guard.

Hehe, sounds like a clever retort. Unfortunately I'm too diplomatic to do something like that. I also prefer to make some actual points so I feel I have achieved something, though in any case it will probably be like water off a dog's bag.

[sf108]

Nice. I've seen those people in Sydney. I recently posted a thread about it, but they've come back again with their cheap looking machine setup on the main city street. Guess I'll print out a few stuff from s-lies.com and show them what they're purporting.

Hope I won't get attacked...

[Vitnir]

The "trick" to avoid falling for salestalk is to take a mental step back and say to yourself "I don't want this" a few times loud in your head, ignore what they say for a while when you do this and the spell is broken. When I figured out that there is a psycology trick to get you to buy the crap I can easily remember that anger I felt and use it to politely say "No thanks".

[Ernesto]

Yes, they're always standing outside their 'shop' on the Tottenham Court Road and I always try to speed past.

I am quite tempted to have a go though, just to see what kind of techniques they use. I like a good argument.

[Donks]

Originally posted by Anders W. Bonde
plindboe,

If it's of any comfort to you, I've been accosted by scientologists in pedestrian streets, too (twice), and both times I proudly told them to f*** off and go could stick their /&%/¤#&# in their &%#¤. Boy, did I enjoy that - they almost looked intimidated!

Not very civil of me, perhaps, but I just don't take kindly to brainwashing, secterian woos that proselyte - and I let them know in no uncertain terms. See, they don't expect that reaction (these didn't anyway) and it threw them completely off guard.
I am of the Anders W. Bonde school of manners. There is one occasion that I do regret it.

[Morwen]

There was a big yellow tent in an area I frequent, too. I saw it fom afar -hard to miss- and wondered idly what it was.

A very nice silver-haired gentleman handed me a leaflet. I looked at it and there was this black-and-white picture of Edison and a legend, in big bold letters: DID YOU KNOW WE USE ONLY 10% OF OUR BRAINPOWER?

I burst out laughing, right there, in front of the guy; a genuinely amused laugh. I couldn't stop myself. It felt good.

I tore the leaflet in half and walked away, laughing out loud all the time. I felt the man watching me with a bemused expression, but I didn't mind. I half-wanted him to challenge me on my laugh, but he didn't.

[ShowMe]

Stress test?

Damn man, have you met my first wife? That almost made me give up atheism so I could believe in Satan.

A painted coffee can, an ohm meter and eight bucks worth of radio shack crap isn't going to compare to that.

[Ashles]

Originally posted by Morwen
There was a big yellow tent in an area I frequent, too. I saw it fom afar -hard to miss- and wondered idly what it was.

A very nice silver-haired gentleman handed me a leaflet. I looked at it and there was this black-and-white picture of Edison and a legend, in big bold letters: DID YOU KNOW WE USE ONLY 10% OF OUR BRAINPOWER?

I burst out laughing, right there, in front of the guy; a genuinely amused laugh. I couldn't stop myself. It felt good.

I tore the leaflet in half and walked away, laughing out loud all the time. I felt the man watching me with a bemused expression, but I didn't mind. I half-wanted him to challenge me on my laugh, but he didn't.
This reminded me of when a friend and I were accosted by a girl giving out those 'free' books that they give you to lure you in.

My friend was drinking milk from a carton and she said to him "You shouldn't drink cold milk - it makes the muscles in your brain freeze"
I said "What?"
"The muscles in your brain lock up, they don't work properly."
I smiled. "There aren't any muscles in your brain"
"Yes there are"
"No there aren't. Trust me, I have a degree in experimental psychology" (What on earth did she think these muscles would do?)
She looked really confused, but thankfully she didn't argue any further.

[Jono]

I can relate to this thread.
If there is something that has crossed my path in life it is the intensity of salesmen... and women of course.

Quite recently I got a call from a telephonesalesman, asking me if I would be interested in changing my phonecompany.

He would not take no for an answer and I, out of sheer amusement and some politeness, refused to slam the phone on him.
He quickly asked me the question:
- So?? You aren't interested in a smaller phone bill??

I answered:
- No

He then hung up on me, lol :)

When confronted with stubbern Jehovas Witnesses, simply ask them if you can in return come home to their place and talk about your own values, beliefs and opinions and perhaps even visit their gatherings and do a presentation of them.

Never fails, though a hose spewing hot water doesn't either :)

[Vitnir]

Originally posted by WhiteLion
...
He quickly asked me the question:
- So?? You aren't interested in a smaller phone bill??

I answered:
- No
...
Haha a kindred spirit, I used that line once too.
Now we need a similar line for $cientologists.

[Morwen]

"Thank you, I'm not interested" works for me, usually. It's all in the delivery.

The other day I had to patiently repeat variations on the same line to a perky and annoying woman who wanted to conduct a survey because once my grandma bought some biographies from them.

"I do not wish to figure in your call lists," I repeated clearly and distinctly a number of times.

"But I don't want to sell you anything, we're just conducting a survey on our clients."

"That's the crux of the matter," I said, very calmly. "I told you the last time you called that I wanted to stop being a client of yours and that would you please take me off your call lists, and you said yes. So I'm not a client, and you should not be calling me. See the situation here?"

*Click*

Scientologists do not make phone calls here yet -thank Ed-, but when I'm handed a leaflet (and I don't burst out laughing) I take it, crumple it without looking at it and drop it in a pocket or convenient waste bin, all in one movement.

If the leaflet-provider is just some kid doing that cr*ppiest of jobs, this allows him or her to finish up quickly, do their job, and not bother me at the same time. They probably care less about the contents of the leaflets than I do.

On the other hand, if it's some obnoxious git with an agenda and a will for me to read whatever nonsense they deliver, it tells them exactly what I think of their approach, while saving me time.

[Jono]

Never had any sort of run-ins with scientologists.

Not a very common aspect of belief in Sweden, again perhaps not a suprize, with Sweden one of the least religious countries in the western world.
Or so I have heard about a thousand times and my personal experience confirms this.

[KillerBob]

Originally posted by plindboe
"Have you ever taken a stress test?"

Ask them if they offer Cardiolite or Thallium (http://www.torrancememorial.org/carnumed.htm)

[jj]

Originally posted by WhiteLion
Not a very common aspect of belief in Sweden, again perhaps not a suprize, with Sweden one of the least religious countries in the western world.

Hi.

I wonder, WhiteLion, you might know. What's a "Strict Swedenborgian"?

I saw a church with that name on it or something like that in Sudbury, Mass.

[Chris Haynes]

My son had a stress test... it involved him having lots of stickers with leads attached to his chest, neck, arms and legs. Then they made him walk on a treadmill as they ran the EKG machine. The doctor stopped him a few times so she could measure his blood pressure. He also had an echocardiogram done at the same time.

He came out with a prescription for atenolol.

Isn't it fun when nutters co-opt a real medical term? Like taking the real field of kinesiology and creating a "applied kinesiology" -- which have absolutely nothing to do with each other.

Also... today I got that "Ma'am, may I ask you a question?" ... to which I replied "No, you may not."

Okay, he was selling hand cream -- which I have been given on every birthday, Mother's Day and Christmas in the past several years. But, still I do not think I have to stop and talk just because he wanted to ask me a question!

By the way, the proper way to deal with telemarketers (like the phone company ones), is to repeat "This number does not accept sales calls. Please remove this number from your list". Do not say anything else --- except when they call and say "This is not a sales call, we are offering you a chance to try..." -- Then I say "This does count as a sales call, please remove this number from your list. We NEVER do business with companies that contact us by phone".

By the way, in the USA... companies that have an established business relationship with you CAN call you. What I do in that case is send them a receipt-requested letter explaining that the next time they call our number I will be taking my business elsewhere.

Anyway, check out www.xenu.net -- Check out the latest Operation Clambake news, apparently there was a big spread in a Norwegian newspaper about the site (it is based in Norway).

[Vitnir]

Originally posted by jj
Hi.

I wonder, WhiteLion, you might know. What's a "Strict Swedenborgian"?

I saw a church with that name on it or something like that in Sudbury, Mass.

It could be from Emanuel Swedenborg (http://swedenborg.newearth.org/)

[SwissSkeptic]

About ten years ago you couldn't walk through my hometown without running into at least two or three of those stress test guys. The worst part was them hanging around the school I was going to and luring pupils into taking their tests after class. Some of my classmates went there out of curiosity and told me the same thing about having a hard time leaving the place without giving out their name and address.

In the meanwhile a law has been passed that forbids fradulent approach in public. I haven't seen many of them doing their "work" since Scientologys appeal was turned down. Which I don't consider such a bad thing...

edit: spelling

[Charlie in Dayton]

Yes, I have. After about ten minutes on the treadmill, and a shot of something vaguely radioactive, I got to lay on an x-ray machine and watch my heart beat. Neat photo procedure...reminded me of some slow-scan TV stuff from ham radio.

Ye olde cardiologist said I would live long enough to pay the bill. Seeing how little I can come up with on a monthly basis, I took that to mean borderline immortality...

As far as 'being on the cans' goes, they call it an 'e-meter', and the next time you're down Ft Lauderdale way, stop in at JREF HQ. There's an e-meter on display in the Asimov Library. If you're there at the right time, and sweet-talk someone (or maybe offer to spring for a couple of pizzas for the staff lunch), they'll show you how it works.

[Soapy Sam]

Word of advice to anyone curious enough to submit to such a test.
Have a false name, address and postcode ready to give, or simply refuse to give those details. Never admit to having email.
If you buy anything from them, use cash, not a credit card.
This avoids further annoying contacts.

[rppa]

Originally posted by Charlie in Dayton
Yes, I have. After about ten minutes on the treadmill, and a shot of something vaguely radioactive, I got to lay on an x-ray machine and watch my heart beat. Neat photo procedure...reminded me of some slow-scan TV stuff from ham radio.

Ye olde cardiologist said I would live long enough to pay the bill. Seeing how little I can come up with on a monthly basis, I took that to mean borderline immortality...

I took one of those before starting on a more intensive exercise program. I passed, i.e. the cardiologist didn't see any signs of any problem. But then he told me that he wouldn't unless the heart disease was pretty advanced and you were pretty close to a heart attack. I didn't find that hugely reassuring.

More stuff to worry about: according to the charts, at my age my maximum heart rate should be about 147 during exercise. Fine. So how much should I worry when I get up into the 150s and 160s on the machines that have monitors? And how much should I worry that I'm probably frequently in that territory when bike riding, when I don't have a monitor?

[RSLancastr]

Originally posted by Ashles
I smiled. "There aren't any muscles in your brain" Of course there are! Why else would some textbooks have exercises at the end of each chapter? :D