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View Full Version : Colon Cleansing for a better You!


luchog
5th September 2005, 11:55 AM
Just encountered this one at work: DrNatura.com Inc. (http://www.drnatura.com/)

It claims that it can cure nearly all minor digestive system disorders, as well as assist weight loss, cure acne, improve skin/hair, and other miraculous things; simply by cleaning out the colon using their patented, and rather pricey, herbal concoction. Because "Death Begins in the Colon"

The ingredients are pretty much your standard natural herbal digestive tonics, antacids, vermifuges, and laxatives. All reasonably effective stuff; but obtainable far more cheaply in various combinations, through your local co-op or natural/health foods store.

But it goes on to claim that everyone has massive amounts of parasites, undigested food, etc. in their colon; and by getting rid of it using their special herbal medicine, so many unrelated things will be improved practically overnight.

Oh, and get this testimonial comment from the front page: "We are having awesome adventures in the bathroom". I don't know about you, but I can't see taking an herbal vermifuge/laxative as being an "awesome adventure in the bathroom". But hey, I guess some people find that sort of thing kinky. To me, that would require at least a fifth of Mezcal, two or three Thai hookers, and some sandlewood and dragon's blood scented bath bombs.

Soapy Sam
5th September 2005, 12:42 PM
The Mezcal probably explains why you need the vermifuge.

Ducky
5th September 2005, 12:42 PM
Originally posted by luchog
Just encountered this one at work: DrNatura.com Inc. (http://www.drnatura.com/)

It claims that it can cure nearly all minor digestive system disorders, as well as assist weight loss, cure acne, improve skin/hair, and other miraculous things; simply by cleaning out the colon using their patented, and rather pricey, herbal concoction. Because "Death Begins in the Colon"

The ingredients are pretty much your standard natural herbal digestive tonics, antacids, vermifuges, and laxatives. All reasonably effective stuff; but obtainable far more cheaply in various combinations, through your local co-op or natural/health foods store.

But it goes on to claim that everyone has massive amounts of parasites, undigested food, etc. in their colon; and by getting rid of it using their special herbal medicine, so many unrelated things will be improved practically overnight.

Oh, and get this testimonial comment from the front page: "We are having awesome adventures in the bathroom". I don't know about you, but I can't see taking an herbal vermifuge/laxative as being an "awesome adventure in the bathroom". But hey, I guess some people find that sort of thing kinky. To me, that would require at least a fifth of Mezcal, two or three Thai hookers, and some sandlewood and dragon's blood scented bath bombs.


I can't resist this one:



That whole set of claims is one big pantload.

We've talked about this colon issue before on the forum, but I can't find the link. I'll post when I get it.

Chris Haynes
5th September 2005, 12:46 PM
You look like you are in need of Eneman!!!

http://oracknows.blogspot.com/2005/09/eneman-answers-poop-doc.html

Though, truthfully... the colon cleansing cult is full of wacky quackery, and it can be dangerous (perferating the colon). See http://www.oag.state.tx.us/oagnews/release.php?id=295 , which was found here: http://www.quackwatch.org/01QuackeryRelatedTopics/gastro.html (check the bottom of the page for more links).

Perpetual Notion
5th September 2005, 01:48 PM
This is when my jouney into the wild and whacky world of sCAM ended for me. I was seeing a Naturopath and Homeopath to deal with a chronic condition for which traditional medicine didn't yet have a cure. The day she suggest I go for the first of a series of colonics was when I bolted. (I should have bolted prior to that when she put me on a one month "cleansing diet" of brown rice and watermelon, but that's another story.)

If you truly are full of intestinal parasites you are one ill MF. And if you have pounds of undigested food in your colon, you need surgery, not a colonic. You are also in excruciating pain before you even get close to having that much fecal matter in you. God, people are idiots.

Rolfe
5th September 2005, 02:28 PM
As I undersand it, the concoctions themselves contain indigestible plant matter which, when passed in the faeces, looks to the uneducated like parasites and so on. You gotta admire the nerve of it.... :D

Rolfe.

Perpetual Notion
5th September 2005, 02:53 PM
Originally posted by Rolfe
As I undersand it, the concoctions themselves contain indigestible plant matter which, when passed in the faeces, looks to the uneducated like parasites and so on. You gotta admire the nerve of it.... :D

Rolfe.

Dang it Rolfe, why do we have ethics. We could make so much money. Just imagine, homeopathic cleansing treatment: water with poppyseeds in it.

Freakshow
5th September 2005, 03:19 PM
Originally posted by fowlsound
I can't resist this one:



That whole set of claims is one big pantload.

We've talked about this colon issue before on the forum, but I can't find the link. I'll post when I get it.

Was the use of the word "pantload" a deliberate joke? Because if so, that was a good one! :D

Soapy Sam
5th September 2005, 03:37 PM
"As I undersand it, the concoctions themselves contain indigestible plant matter which, when passed in the faeces, looks to the uneducated like parasites and so on. You gotta admire the nerve of it...."

Rolfe.

Oh ye of little faith...

Verily- is it not written?- "Ye canny whack a good dump."

luchog
5th September 2005, 04:01 PM
Originally posted by fowlsound
hat whole set of claims is one big pantload.

Yeah, I thought the guy was full of sh*t myself.

CaveDave
5th September 2005, 11:59 PM
I started this thread awhile back on a related question.

http://forums.randi.org/showthread.php?s=&threadid=59541

There were many good responses given.

Dave

MRC_Hans
6th September 2005, 02:46 AM
Ah, yes, there it was.

As for general woo detection, whenever ANYTHING is good for more that three different ailments, the red light goes on, automatically.

Hans

Mojo
6th September 2005, 03:06 AM
Originally posted by fowlsound
I can't resist this one:



That whole set of claims is one big pantload.As Eddie said in Absolutely Fabulous: "it's called colonic irrigation, it's not to be sniffed at."

Ducky
6th September 2005, 03:15 AM
Originally posted by MRC_Hans
Ah, yes, there it was.

As for general woo detection, whenever ANYTHING is good for more that three different ailments, the red light goes on, automatically.

Hans


Good point, Hans. My other favorite is if it cures Cancer and at least 1 other major disease also.

Mojo
6th September 2005, 03:26 AM
Originally posted by MRC_Hans
As for general woo detection, whenever ANYTHING is good for more that three different ailments, the red light goes on, automatically. Never mind that! I noticed this in the thread CaveDave linked to: Originally posted by Sarah-I
I think it is rubbish too. If even she thinks it's rubbish...

Ducky
6th September 2005, 03:29 AM
Originally posted by Mojo
Never mind that! I noticed this in the thread CaveDave linked to: If even she thinks it's rubbish...



:D


Good point!

MRC_Hans
6th September 2005, 03:31 AM
In my experience, you can infer absolutly nothing about the viability of an idea, based on Sarah-I's opinion on it. Not even whether it is consistent with the things she does believe in.

Hans

Mojo
6th September 2005, 05:09 AM
Originally posted by MRC_Hans
In my experience, you can infer absolutly nothing about the viability of an idea, based on Sarah-I's opinion on it. Not even whether it is consistent with the things she does believe in. I was just thinking that if she can believe in the sort of therapies she espouses, but can't swallow colonic irrigation, it really has a problem!

On the other hand, maybe her objection is that it actually involves doing something to the patient. After all, the things she says she practices (e.g. homeopathy: have chat with patient, give patient sugar pills; or craniosacral therapy: have chat with patient, gently massage non-intimate bits of fully clothed patient) hardly involve getting your hands dirty.

c4ts
6th September 2005, 05:26 AM
Uhhh... "death begins in the colon?" No, death begins wherever you get that unchecked tumor...

Mid
6th September 2005, 05:51 AM
It has to be said that "death begins in the colon" sounds like a tag line for a very bad horror story :D

c4ts
6th September 2005, 05:59 AM
Originally posted by Mid
It has to be said that "death begins in the colon" sounds like a tag line for a very bad horror story :D

It was a quiet day in the anus... AND THEN!!! IT CAME FROM THE COLON!!!

luchog
6th September 2005, 05:16 PM
Originally posted by Mojo
I was just thinking that if she can believe in the sort of therapies she espouses, but can't swallow colonic irrigation, it really has a problem!

I think the vast majority of us would have a problem swallowing colonic irrigation.

Piscivore
6th September 2005, 05:53 PM
Originally posted by c4ts
It was a quiet day in the anus... AND THEN!!! IT CAME FROM THE COLON!!!

"it was a dark and smelly bunghole..."

Ducky
6th September 2005, 05:57 PM
Originally posted by MRC_Hans
In my experience, you can infer absolutly nothing about the viability of an idea, based on Sarah-I's opinion on it. Not even whether it is consistent with the things she does believe in.

Hans


Speaking of which, where is our fun libelous woo friend?

Even Kumar comes back to randomly flame...

Perpetual Notion
6th September 2005, 06:20 PM
Originally posted by Piscivore
"it was a dark and smelly bunghole..."

You all are sick and twisted bunch. Thank Ed. This is the funnest place on the net. :D

Perpetual Notion
6th September 2005, 06:22 PM
Originally posted by fowlsound
Speaking of which, where is our fun libelous woo friend?

Even Kumar comes back to randomly flame...

Maybe she's getting her certification in colonic irrigation. :rolleyes:

CaveDave
6th September 2005, 07:41 PM
Originally posted by fowlsound
Speaking of which, where is our fun libelous woo friend?

Just don't go into a dark bathroom,
Don't stare into the mirror,
Don't repeat Her name three times,
Sarah-I...Sarah-I...Sara.........
AAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE.................









Dave

Freakshow
6th September 2005, 11:40 PM
Originally posted by Mid
It has to be said that "death begins in the colon" sounds like a tag line for a very bad horror story :D

Or a VERY bad porno film...

c4ts
7th September 2005, 09:47 AM
Originally posted by Freakshow
Or a VERY bad porno film...

Only in Germany.