8th November 2005, 11:07 PM
Angry people press charges against malls and airports that use the theory of elevation! They propose that escalators be marked with warning lables, urging people to use the Intelligent Designer stairs instead. Those opposed say that ID stairs go nowhere, defeating the purpose of a moving staircase. Still, the revolutionaries won't stop until their escalator designs are given equal consideration by all pedestrians, and they should be given the choice between a dangerous clacky black thing which will swallow you alive if you don't step off in time, or a comforting set of Intelligently Designed stairs that gently entice you to climb their foundationless steps.