French Uniforms

[Richard G]

Subject: How uniform colors were selected!

A long time ago, Britain and France were at war. During onebattle, the
French captured an English Major.

Taking the Major to their headquarters, the French General began toquestion him. The French General asked, "Why do you English officers all wear redcoats? Don't you know the red material makes you easier targets for us to shoot at?"

In his bland English way, the Major informed the general that thereason English officers wear red coats is so that if they are shot, the blood won't show and the men they are leading won't panic.

And that is why, from that day until now, all French Army Officers wear brown pants.

[RichardR]

http://www.handykult.de/plaudersmilies.de/happy/roflmao.gif

[Frostbite]

ROFL

[Lyle Beaudoin]

Your insights into politics and current events astound me.

[a_unique_person]

This is a much more dignified uniform.

http://www.cinemusic.de/dvd2000/patton-1.jpg

[shuize]

Great movie!

[UnrepentantSinner]

I'm skeptical of the veracity of this story.

Is your source credible?

[schplurg]

"The Queensland Scottish Regiment was one of the most colourful of the Australian Pre-Federation Scottish Regiments, the white Soudan spiked helmet and scarlet tunic giving it a very distinctive look. The officer illustrated is of the 1886 period, although the Soudan-type helmet war worn until 1905."

http://www.gameedit.com/mike/oz8.jpg

Yeah I had to search back a ways for a really goofy Aussie one to counter that Patton pic hehe! :D Could you imagine running for your life from these guys? I think the theory is that you cut off the heads of the enemy while they are still laughing at your kilt.

Incidentally, for anyone interested, I found the pic at a Uniforms of Australian Armed Forces site. (http://www.geocities.com/obees.geo/ozuniform/frame.htm) I think it's interesting that sometimes I learn a lot while "researching" some of these threads. Seriously. In fact I'm interested in where the Scottish / Aussie connection came from. Did the Scotts colonize Australia? Yes, I'm completely ignorant on the subject, I admit, but not for long...I shall read on...

EDIT: Oops pic doesn't show. I'll upload it to my server.

[a_unique_person]

It's very fetching. Maybe when they lift up their kilts the enemy runs.

[a_unique_person]

Originally posted by schplurg
[BYeah I had to search back a ways for a really goofy Aussie one to counter that Patton pic hehe! :D Could you imagine running for your life from these guys? I think the theory is that you cut off the heads of the enemy while they are still laughing at your kilt.



I read that Patton wasn't happy after the disaster at Kesselraine (sp), and made everyone wear a heavy, steel helmet, even the nurses miles behind the lines.

He saw some injured soldiers, one of whom was suffering bad shell shock, and slapped the guy on the face with his gloves.

A good fighting general, but not destined for higher command.

[schplurg]

It's very fetching. Maybe when they lift up their kilts the enemy runs.
LOL I'll bet they would!

[a_unique_person]

http://www.guthrie.k12.ok.us/~jcleaver/beefeaters.jpg

How about these guys, the Beefeaters. Did you know they are all gay? That is how they got their name.



http://www.vatican.va/vatican_city_state/services/telephones/img/carta35g.jpg

And if terrorists ever go after the pope, I can't imagine pikes being much use.

[schplurg]

Oh man what a great thread, I am laughing my ass off!!! I didn't know they were gay (are you serious?), but that would be my assumption anyways upon seeing the uniforms. The guy on the left looks rather like Mr. Bush.

Sorry RichardG if this getting off-topic.
Guess I better post another pic to keep things going...although I dunno if I can top that last one!

Edit: to add (from a book cover).
War would be so much more fun if soldiers still wore all these things and used the old weapons:

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/2914417004.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

[003998]

Cool, jokes about nations.

Let's see....
ah, there is one.

[schplurg]

Ya seen that before. It is funny though, however it has nothing to do with military uniforms, which is what we were making fun of.

By the way, welcome to the JREF :)

[Tesserat]

What a let down. I see the thread title, "french uniforms" and find out it's not about french maids.

[schplurg]

What a let down. I see the thread title, "french uniforms" and find out it's not about french maids.
http://www.gameedit.com/mike/maid.jpg

[ceo_esq]

Originally posted by a_unique_person
http://www.vatican.va/vatican_city_state/services/telephones/img/carta35g.jpg

And if terrorists ever go after the pope, I can't imagine pikes being much use.
Ha! And halberds would seem a tad dangerous for crowd control purposes.

Seriously, though, concealed within those snazzy duds is either a semiautomatic pistol or one of these (http://www.berettadefence.com/INGLESE/default_tabella_pistola_mitragliatrice_PM_12_S2.ht m).

[Pad]

Originally posted by 003998
Cool, jokes about nations.

Let's see....
ah, there is one. And now there is a new one.

http://www.jigsawlounge.co.uk/kungfu/world/world-usa2003.gif

[voidx]

The guy with the plume hat isn't carrying a pike or a halberd. Rather its a 2-handed sword, or Great Sword. What the germans called a doppelhanden. It would be used against pikes though to try and snap off or dislodge the points. It was also used against foot soldiers to great effect. Most Medieval weapons were used in combinations. Great Swords in groups with swords and shields and others with spears. Shield guy protects the Great sword guy who with his extended reach could use the nasty cutting ability from behind the proctection of the sword and shield troops. There's plenty of useful techniques and formations that were used. The invention of guns made almost all forms of swords obsolete, as well as most forms of armour worn. With the exception for some time afterwards perhaps of sabre wielding cavalry, or modified forms such as bayonettes.

[LW]

Originally posted by ceo_esq

Ha! And halberds would seem a tad dangerous for crowd control purposes.

I don't know whether you know this, but since the year 1500 or so, halberds were used almost exclusively for crowd control. Though, the crowd was usually an infantry formation and the controller was a sergeant whose job was to ensure that every men stayed where should be.

[LW]

Now, looking more closely at the uniform pictures that have been posted on this thread I made an interesting observation: none of the French uniforms have brown pants but the only American example has them. Maybe Richard G made a simple mistake and mixed up the nationalities in the story.

[richardm]

Originally posted by a_unique_person

How about these guys, the Beefeaters. Did you know they are all gay? That is how they got their name.



Just to clarify: They are not all gay. They got their name because of their habit of going into battle in yellow and black stripes (vestiges of which can still be seen on their uniform).

They looked, to fanciful Tudors, like bees or wasps; hence "Bee Fighters", which over the centuries was corrupted to "Beefeaters".

[/end lies]

[a_unique_person]

Originally posted by richardm



Just to clarify: They are not all gay. They got their name because of their habit of going into battle in yellow and black stripes (vestiges of which can still be seen on their uniform).

They looked, to fanciful Tudors, like bees or wasps; hence "Bee Fighters", which over the centuries was corrupted to "Beefeaters".

[/end lies]

Actually, it was an old Barry Humphries joke, but your explanation sounds just as plausible.

[Mike B.]

When I first heard that pants joke it was about the Italian Army (World War II, I suppose).

I suppose it gets constantly re-cycled.

Don't worry next time the US loses a war or something, an American will be substituted.