Never Let Your Children Out of Your Sight

[Hardenbergh]

I read a story about a sex offender who attempted to kidnap an 8-year-old girl while she and her family were shopping at Wal-Mart in Waterville, Maine. This happens every day but it's not such a common occurrence in rural Maine. It serves as a reminder that our children should never be out of our sight even for a moment.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Kidnap attempt foiled


By DOUG HARLOW
Staff Writer

WATERVILLE -- A Code Adam alert at Wal-Mart and quick action by two local men Saturday afternoon saved an 8-year-old girl from an abduction attempt by a man out on bail for a child-sex crime, police said.

Waterville police Sgt. Jeffrey Bearce said 56-year-old Richard P. Decca of Winding Hill Road in Norridgewock is charged with leading the girl from the store to a car in the parking lot.

A call came to the police switchboard from Wal-Mart security at about 1:30 p.m. Saturday reporting a missing child, Bearce said.

"They immediately did, I believe they call it a Code Adam -- they locked the store down, nobody in, nobody out," he said. "A minute or so after that two gentlemen came to the outside of the door from the parking lot with the 8-year-old girl, who was the missing child, along with a male subject."

The men had heard the alert over the store intercom and recognized her red hair, skirt and sweater.

http://kennebecjournal.mainetoday.com/news/local/2801608.shtml

[billydkid]

I read a story about a sex offender who attempted to kidnap an 8-year-old girl while she and her family were shopping at Wal-Mart in Waterville, Maine. This happens every day but it's not such a common occurrence in rural Maine. It serves as a reminder that our children should never be out of our sight even for a moment.



http://kennebecjournal.mainetoday.com/news/local/2801608.shtml

That is very terrifying. I do wonder, however, if this really does happen everyday. Back when I was a child nobody fretted about their kids. When my mom took us shopping we parted ways at the door and me an my little sister spent the next several hours wandering around from floor to floor and department to department. I have to wonder if it is really true that there really a lot more sick people nowadays than their were back then. I know it feels like the world is a lot more unsafe, but I wonder if that is really true. If so, I wonder what precipitated this sea change in society. Truth be told, I would never have let my son wander around alone in a public place when he was younger. I wonder if this is a reflection of the fact that the world is truly more dangerous for kids. If so, I wonder why the hell why. What has happened to us that so many of us have turned into monsters?

[RandFan]

There seems to be a lot of abduction stories relating to Wal-Mart some true some not. This one looks quite true based on the news source and the degree of detail.


Code Adam: True (http://www.snopes.com/language/eponyms/codeadam.htm)
Altering appearance: False (http://www.snopes.com/horrors/parental/kidnap.htm)

[Hardenbergh]

That is very terrifying. I do wonder, however, if this really does happen everyday. Back when I was a child nobody fretted about their kids. When my mom took us shopping we parted ways at the door and me an my little sister spent the next several hours wandering around from floor to floor and department to department. I have to wonder if it is really true that there really a lot more sick people nowadays than their were back then. I know it feels like the world is a lot more unsafe, but I wonder if that is really true. If so, I wonder what precipitated this sea change in society. Truth be told, I would never have let my son wander around alone in a public place when he was younger. I wonder if this is a reflection of the fact that the world is truly more dangerous for kids. If so, I wonder why the hell why. What has happened to us that so many of us have turned into monsters?

My mother said the same thing about not having to keep such close track of our every move when we were young children. She said that she didn't think too much about it if we wanted to go over in the toy department while they were looking at something else. We certainly live in a different world today.

[RandFan]

My mother said the same thing about not having to keep such close track of our every move when we were young children. She said that she didn't think too much about it if we wanted to go over in the toy department while they were looking at something else. We certainly live in a different world today.Keeping track of children is a reasonable precaution but how serious is the threat from a statistical point of view?

[Zep]

So there are far more child-sex-offenders today than in our youth? Or before then? Somehow I would tend to doubt that there would be many more such people active only in recent times.

Certainly incidents such as this and the reportage is more open and frequent now, which gives the impression there are more of them active now. And our society's attitudes have changed too. I expect it was considered perfectly "natural" in stone-age times to kidnap children from neighbouring villages as a matter of course... The Romans certainly did so as well with the nations they conquered, and put them into slavery too. All "perfectly natural" in their time.

[Hardenbergh]

Keeping track of children is a reasonable precaution but how serious is the threat from a statistical point of view?

I guess the answer to that is doing everything possible to ensure that your child doesn't become a statistic. Of course, it's not much fun living in fear and thinking that some crazy person is just around the corner waiting to snatch your children.

[Hardenbergh]

So there are far more child-sex-offenders today than in our youth? Or before then? Somehow I would tend to doubt that there would be many more such people active only in recent times.

Certainly incidents such as this and the reportage is more open and frequent now, which gives the impression there are more of them active now. And our society's attitudes have changed too. I expect it was considered perfectly "natural" in stone-age times to kidnap children from neighbouring villages as a matter of course... The Romans certainly did so as well with the nations they conquered, and put them into slavery too. All "perfectly natural" in their time.

You're right that there's a lot more news coverage about these cases. I guess it's a good thing because it makes parents pay more attention.

[Zep]

You're right that there's a lot more news coverage about these cases. I guess it's a good thing because it makes parents pay more attention.Oh, agreed! We did when Zeplette was young, and I don't advocate the opposite at all.

And I have no sympathy whatsoever at all for the bastards who do try to abduct children. There's a special place they can be left to rot, IMHO.

But I do think we need to keep some perspective too. It's not a new issue, and it's probably not an issue on the increase either.

[Hardenbergh]

Oh, agreed! We did when Zeplette was young, and I don't advocate the opposite at all.

And I have no sympathy whatsoever at all for the bastards who do try to abduct children. There's a special place they can be left to rot, IMHO.

But I do think we need to keep some perspective too. It's not a new issue, and it's probably not an issue on the increase either.

I don't understand why he's out of jail anyway.

Bearce said he handled a case in April involving Decca, who was charged with unlawful sexual contact with a 1-year-old girl in Waterville. He is on bail for that charge. "This could have had a different outcome if he had gotten her into his car and left," Bearce said.

I'm just thankful that this story had a happy ending.

[Beerina]

There was just a case in southeast Michigan over the weekend where some guy walked up to a 1 1/2 year old at a garage sale and tried to lead him away by the hand. He didn't get away with the child, but he did get away.

[Eos of the Eons]

There are more child sex trade markets around the world now, and more people making videos/portfolios to sell over the net too. People quibble over child porn laws. I figure we need to cramp down more than ever.

[Zep]

There are more child sex trade markets around the world now, and more people making videos/portfolios to sell over the net too. People quibble over child porn laws.With respect, I suggest the visibility of the child sex trade is higher than it used to be, especially due to the internet and global news, etc. Same for any number of other violent and/or anti-social crimes. Doesn't make any of it any less disgusting, in my opinion.

I figure we need to cramp down more than ever.Agree 100%. Let's use their distribution medium against them, for a start.

[kittynh]

yeah, because with the internet, dirty photos of children are worth more than ever before.

[Rob Lister]

With respect, I suggest the visibility of the child sex trade is higher than it used to be, especially due to the internet and global news, etc. Same for any number of other violent and/or anti-social crimes. Doesn't make any of it any less disgusting, in my opinion.



I tend to agree with you Zep. It's matter of reporting...and it doesn't make it any less disgusting, but more so...since it's being put in our faces every day. It testifies to the fact that our current laws do not now, and perhaps never have protected us as it could from this form of criminal behavior. Take this case for example: the guy was out on bail for what???

We give them short sentences, let them out of jail with their balls still attached, parade them as celebrities on the front of People magazine (LaTurno) , etc. It's only when a small kid ends up dead do we start to take it seriously. It frankly pisses me off.

[RandFan]

I guess the answer to that is doing everything possible to ensure that your child doesn't become a statistic. Of course, it's not much fun living in fear and thinking that some crazy person is just around the corner waiting to snatch your children. That's my point. Why should we fear? Are you scared of cars? Perhaps you should be. Your child is far more likely to die in an auto accident than to be abducted yet for some odd reason we don't live in fear of the car.

Take reasonable precautions. DON'T live in fear.

[Eos of the Eons]

I feel, after reading the responses to my post, that people are oblivious to the fact that there is an international child sex trade that is booming. Get the kid out of the country, and snap pics, make videos, sell them internationally, even sell the kid at child sex parties. I'm not talking just the internet, that is only one small factor.

I'll try to find some links.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4038249/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/1535199.stm"It's extremely graphic, most of it's sexual. What we see is anything from infants all the way up and that comes across constantly, things that just shock the conscience and the mind," one detective told the BBC.

[TragicMonkey]

I would have said fear of child abduction is only one reason to watch your kids. What about keeping them from hurting themselves, or wrecking things, or bugging people?

[Rob Lister]

That's my point. Why should we fear? Are you scared of cars? Perhaps you should be. Your child is far more likely to die in an auto accident than to be abducted yet for some odd reason we don't live in fear of the car.

Take reasonable precautions. DON'T live in fear.

Apples and oranges. To be grusome, I would RATHER my child be killed in an automobile accident than abducted successfully by a pediphile with the obvious intent.

Fact is, we let these people go scott free. The 'too short for jail' case is an obvious example. Lock them up, throw away the key.

[RandFan]

Apples and oranges. To be grusome, I would RATHER my child be killed in an automobile accident than abducted successfully by a pediphile with the obvious intent. Oh for crying in the dark. What is the risk? Do you even know? Your fear is irrational. Don't get me wrong, I have called the police in a panic because I thought my child was missing. I know what that fear is. I have 3 kids.

The point is that the best we can do is take reasonable precautions but understand what the risks are and to not live in irrational fear.

[Rob Lister]

Oh for crying in the dark. What is the risk? Do you even know? Your fear is irrational. Don't get me wrong, I have called the police in a panic because I thought my child was missing. I know what that fear is. I have 3 kids.

The point is that the best we can do is take reasonable precautions but understand what the risks are and to not live in irrational fear.

Oh for crying in the dark out loud: I know the risk is small of an actual abduction, but not of a molestation. We allow these ... creatures ... to roam our streets at will. We catch them in the act and release them back to do their thing. It's an EASY thing to not let them back out on the street. And a damn good thing too. Yet we don't do it. Oh! He's too short to go to jail. He might end up as somebody's bitch! And then apologists come out of the woodwork. It sickens me.

[clarsct]

Well, KEEPING these guys locked up seems to be a decent idea, but seperate from the issue of living in fear vs. reasonable precautions.

I get the feeling that Rob and Randfan are arguing two different subjects.

I don't think I'm going to live in fear of pedophiles, but I also think I am going to be a conscientious(sp?) parent.

If I catch someone trying to lead my child away, they'd better beat feet in a hurry.....

[RandFan]

Oh for crying in the dark out loud: I know the risk is small of an actual abduction, but not of a molestation. We allow these ... creatures ... to roam our streets at will. We catch them in the act and release them back to do their thing. It's an EASY thing to not let them back out on the street. And a damn good thing too. Yet we don't do it. Oh! He's too short to go to jail. He might end up as somebody's bitch! And then apologists come out of the woodwork. It sickens me.Huh?

Let's back up. The thread is about abductions, right? A very scary prospect.

Keeping track of children is a reasonable precaution but how serious is the threat from a statistical point of view?

I guess the answer to that is doing everything possible to ensure that your child doesn't become a statistic. Of course, it's not much fun living in fear and thinking that some crazy person is just around the corner waiting to snatch your children.

That's my point. Why should we fear? Are you scared of cars? Perhaps you should be. Your child is far more likely to die in an auto accident than to be abducted yet for some odd reason we don't live in fear of the car.

Take reasonable precautions. DON'T live in fear. I'm not an apologist and I'm not talking about molestation, which BTW is more likely to happen at the hands of family members and acquaintances and not convicted pedophiles but that is beside the point.

I'm addressing the subject of the thread. Don't live in fear because there is no reason to live in fear.

[RandFan]

I get the feeling that Rob and Randfan are arguing two different subjects. I get the feeling that you are correct.

[Tricky]

I would have said fear of child abduction is only one reason to watch your kids. What about keeping them from hurting themselves, or wrecking things, or bugging people?
Indeed (http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/metropolitan/3923917.html).
A few minutes unsupervised proves deadly
7-year-old ran ahead to the deep end as his father blew up 'floaties'
...
For about "four to five minutes," no one saw Dequan lying under 8 feet, 6 inches of water in the deep end of the pool, Flores said.

"That's all it takes," Flores said. "We don't know what happened, but he went under in the deep end.

[Zep]

I feel, after reading the responses to my post, that people are oblivious to the fact that there is an international child sex trade that is booming. Get the kid out of the country, and snap pics, make videos, sell them internationally, even sell the kid at child sex parties. I'm not talking just the internet, that is only one small factor.

I'll try to find some links.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/4038249/

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/1535199.stmOh no - please don't think I am unaware of it or think it is an insignificant situation! Nor am I condoning it in any way. I have a child too.

I'm suggesting that we can get smarter about finding and dealing with them rapidly, as well as ensuring they stay dealt with.

[slingblade]

It's very important to keep an eye on your kids, to watch them, monitor them, keep them close.

It's also very important to teach them to keep an eye on themselves. To be aware, to keep you in sight, to not run ahead or talk to people when you aren't around. Teach them to help themselves. Because as much as you want to, you can't be there every minute, and because not teaching them cripples them.

Did you know that many kids don't have a clue what a "stranger" is? That you can tell them plainly "A stranger is someone you don't know. Don't talk to people you don't know."

Then a grown-up walks up and talks to them. And they answer! Why? "He isn't a stranger--he talked to me." The stranger talks to them first--they didn't talk to him, just like you said--so he must know them.

Hey, it's kid-logic.

[RandFan]

FWIW, we actually have some one on this forum who works with people who have lost children in abductions. The following is a reply she gave me a month or so ago.

Yes, this is definetely one of the top fears a parent has for their child. At least with an illness, there is a chance of recovery. If the child dies, there is a grieving process that is followed, even though it is painful. With a missing child, one is stuck in the grieving process, as they do not know if they should grieve, or why.

We strive to educate the public not just to be aware of missing persons, but to take common sense precautions with their own children's safety. We get some who take it a bit too far (My child will not step outside without me) and some too compacent. (I live in a safe neighborhood..that won't happen here.)

Every parent I ever spoke to thought it could never happen to them.

Oh, and make sure your schools are not still teaching "Stranger Danger".

Thanks,
Kelly

[Eos of the Eons]

I have a tough time not being an overprotective parent. My kids must tell me where they are going, but I still wonder if they will make it to where they are headed. My worst fear is losing my child and not knowing whether said child is dead or worse. Can you imagine a life being used and then thrown away? That is hell, here on earth. I saw a CSI episode that just reinforced my fears.

So yeah, try to be aware, and not be too overprotective. A parent always worries.

[aerocontrols]

http://forums.randi.org/imagehost/2434484f40e2eb8f.jpg


I don't let him out of my sight, for your protection.

[slingblade]

Dat's a cute puppy!


...the teeth are a dead giveaway. ;)