Weird Sneezes

[malaka]

Just now, over my cube wall, I hear a soft, high-pitched, "Aaa-kcm, Aaa-kcm". Thats probably the best I can describe it.

When I sneeze, it is not a huge production, but not subdued, either. "Aaaa-choo!". Normal.

However, through the years I have heard the gamut. Extremely loud, grandiose sneezes. Tiny, quiet sneezes. Stifled sneezes. Even sneezes that...don't sound like sneezes! You know the ones. You recognize it as a true sneeze, but it sounds like they simply spoke the words "Aaa-choo".

So, my question is: What causes the wide variety of sneezes? Is there some advantage to sneezing one way as opposed to another (other than being a spy or attending a dinner party)? Can you teach yourself to sneeze a certain way?

[Apathia]

Often the kind of sneeze depends on where the irritant is located in the nasal cavity. When I stiffle a sneeze, it's because the air pressure needs to be rerouted to where the irritant is. Most of my outright sneezes end in "-ma!"
I used to work at a school where there was a co-worker named "Shemaia." Sometimes people would think I was calling for her.

[atari24]

I purposely make my sneezes loud and strange for comedic effect. I often incorporate inappropriate words as well. Lately my sneezes have been sounding like Blast-OCYST.

But I think sometimes weird sounding sneezes are caused by people's embarassment. I've heard women make those sneezes that just sound like they said Ahh-choo quietly, and I find it hard to believe that anything was expelled out of the nose at a useful rate of speed.

[Obsequious]

I am guilty of the funny sneeze. Sometimes when I need to sneeze, it just doesn't happen and I end up wandering around, flapping my hands, gasping "aaah-aaah-aaah--hnngdammitwork!" Sometimes I'll try on a little pretend "Ah-tsew" sound at the end in an effort to get things moving along, you know, give my nose a better idea of what it's supposed to be doing.

It doesn't work any better than chance but at least it alleviates my frustration somewhat.

[Almo]

I had some bad allergies, and I got tired of the noise of sneezing, so mine are very quiet - just "Hut - CHHH."

[Buckaroo]

There was an early section of Jackson's King Kong devoted to a discussion of the funny sneeze...

[miatasport99]

Mine sounds like a cough because I blow all the air out of my mouth. I trained myself to do this after some messy sneezing incidents. I’ve often wondered if anyone else does this.

[Grimoire]

But I think sometimes weird sounding sneezes are caused by people's embarassment. I've heard women make those sneezes that just sound like they said Ahh-choo quietly, and I find it hard to believe that anything was expelled out of the nose at a useful rate of speed.

When did you meet my wife?!

[Almo]

Mine sounds like a cough because I blow all the air out of my mouth. I trained myself to do this after some messy sneezing incidents. I’ve often wondered if anyone else does this.

I do that if I think it will be an ugly one, or if there's food in my mouth. :boxedin:

[jamrat]

I go for the full effect when sneezing. I try to expel as much air (and irritant) as possible. Messy sometimes, but effective.

[Modified]

I go for the full effect when sneezing. I try to expel as much air (and irritant) as possible. Messy sometimes, but effective.

Same here. After a good one I can feel the lining of my lungs aching.

[casebro]

Yeah, I'd sure like to slap a couple people I know, just for making such a big production out of a simple sneeze: Ah- CHOOoooOOOooooOOOOooo is one, the other is ah- (insert "Choooo" in 128 point caps).

Worse than the noise is when I cover my mouth, but the sneeze blows crud out of my eyes, onto my glasses. I guess eye ducts need clearing too.

[Iamme]

The world record sneeze for speed is to be at about 100 mph. They never clocked mine. Mine surely has to be 200 mph. Mine is so loud and violent that unless I purse my lips when I sneeze, I will give myself an instant sore throat. It is an exTREME sneeze. Very unlike those girly sneezes where barely a sound is heard except for some faint ah-choo, that is politely held back. No holding back mine...that's for sure.

[Polaris]

We've all known someone who has no build-up to their sneezes, I think. It's just a fBWAAAHH(!!!)-choo. My step-dad was like this. Didn't help that he had the ability to walk into a room stealthily (he liked to wear socks with no slippers) and not announce his presence. I can think of more than one occasion where my heart skipped a beat when he would blast out one of his sneezes while I was watching TV or reading.

The wierdest one I ever heard was a kid I went to K-12 with. He never sneezed just once, it was always three or more times per salvo. And they weren't normal sneezes either, they were like cat sneezes with aftershocks. He would go *SNTTZZT-ffft-ffft* a bunch of times. Did it a lot too. Come to think of it, he was a wierd kid. Looked like Harpo Marx, sounded like Elmer Fudd. We all expected him to either become some super-genius recluse or shoot people from a bell tower somewhere. He's rather normal now as it turns out.

I wonder how much of a person's sneeze is part of their personality.

[Dragonrock]

I go for the full effect when sneezing. I try to expel as much air (and irritant) as possible. Messy sometimes, but effective.

Unless snot hits a wall somewhere I consider a sneeze wasted.

[Glen.Nogami]

Yeah, I'd sure like to slap a couple people I know, just for making such a big production out of a simple sneeze: Ah- CHOOoooOOOooooOOOOooo is one, the other is ah- (insert "Choooo" in 128 point caps).

Worse than the noise is when I cover my mouth, but the sneeze blows crud out of my eyes, onto my glasses. I guess eye ducts need clearing too.

Holy...I don't think I've ever done that. I kind of feel tempted to try now though.

[Dog Boots]

I always wondered what the "Aaaa" in "Aaaa-chuuu" was for? I can understand the sound of the expelled air and all, maybe even putting some vocal cords on that - but why the build-up?

My sneezes are just the "chuu", without vowels - just the air. It always makes my girlfriend giggle - she says it sounds like her mom's dog.

My mom's sneeze, on the other hand, is an Amazon warrier "AAAAAHHHH" ending abrubtly in a modest "pf". Usually they hunt in packs.

I also get great satisfaction from a good, violent sneeze. Can be messy, but what the heck. Do you know those sneezes that make your nose oscillate briefly? (Probably not all do - my nose is quite rubbery/flexible) If not - you're missing out on great fun! Only happens once a year or so, though. Feels like an extremely intense, but short, nose-massage :o) And then, for further fun, I usually try to find out what note it/I hit (I play music). I must start keeping records of that...

[Silly Green Monkey]

A sneeze starts with an abrupt deep inhalation, to provide a mass of air for irritant expulsion. That deep gasp is the source of the 'aaaa'.

[Dog Boots]

A sneeze starts with an abrupt deep inhalation, to provide a mass of air for irritant expulsion. That deep gasp is the source of the 'aaaa'.

Yes, but I never got why people put so much sound on it - why the "AAAH"-sound? And, that happens after the inhalation...

[Soapy Sam]

I once met a woman whose sneeze sounded exactly like the word "Aaatishoo".
I was amazed and told her she was the only truly onomatopoeic sneezer I had ever heard. She replied that she had always tried to sneeze this way as she thought this was the proper way to do it.

Barking mad, but a lovely sneezer.