Ugh! Look At You! You've got a DIRTY Aura!

[H3LL]

Puzzled why people avoid getting close?

Yes! You've guessed it.

You have a dirty aura. Shame on you.

Embarrassed?

Never fear...The answer's here:

Aura Cleanser (http://www.colourenergy.com/alchemy_line.html)

From Colour Energy (http://www.colourenergy.com/)

More woo than a steam rally and shifting more HS than Heracles.

While you are there check out the colour-coded Chakkra essence. My favourite was Red:

http://www.colourenergy.com/img/alchemy/red_essences_icon.gif
Grounds and focuses daily activity and helps to release past issues and blockages by building up your root.

Not sure how it works with females.

:D

.

[Soapy Sam]

I use the DOS vesion.
Only does 16 colours. Fortunately my aura is black.

[H3LL]

I was trying to find a firm claim but it's mostly waffly-woo-speak and reading so much of it made my head implode.

Those of you with a more resilient cranium might find some, failing that just post your favourite bit.

.

[Dragon]

Dirt could be the least of your problems - your aura could have holes! :eek:

However, help is at hand with the "powerful Aura Cleanser Essence" which encourages energetic responses from multi-levels of consciousness, clearing any negative threat, psychic or otherwise. It also helps to heal damaged human electromagnetic energy fields (auras that have holes) resultant from destructive lower frequencies (cell phones, computers, etc.) and assists in healing, preventing or alleviating serious imbalances.

eta - that's some mighty fine woo you found there, H3LL!

[Big Al]

We couldn't afford colour when I was young. My aura's in Glorious Monochrome. :(

Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi: you're my only hope...

[H3LL]

I've emailed all their offices asking for information on what the products actually do.

I'm not expecting a reply. :p

.

[Dragon]

We couldn't afford colour when I was young. My aura's in Glorious Monochrome. :(

Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi: you're my only hope...http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/7/7f/Obiwanmindtrick.JPG

"This is not the woo you are looking for. You can go about your business"

[H3LL]

Oh Gosh!

Biopulsar Intensive Training
Learn How to become a Biopulsar Analyst

Luckily I get my $995 back when I buy the "Biopulsar-Reflexograph Biofeedback System".

Phew! That's a relief.


Today is a green day..Apparently.


ETA: "Fluff" up your aura by charging your energy field! - Aura Cleanser will cost $9.95 for 4oz/125ml.


If I "fluff" up my aura/energy field, does that fill the holes or are the holes filled with the spray?

I'm concerned as I dont want little puffs of spray stuck in my aura and hovering around my head.

People might stare!:eye-poppi


I've got to stop..Every line is pure gold ("understand the law of duality")


.

[H3LL]

Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi: you're my only hope...

"This is not the woo you are looking for. You can go about your business"

:D :D :D

.

[Mojo]

Puzzled why people avoid getting close?

Yes! You've guessed it.

You have a dirty aura. Shame on you.

Embarrassed?

Never fear...The answer's here:

Aura Cleanser (http://www.colourenergy.com/alchemy_line.html)

From Colour Energy (http://www.colourenergy.com/)

Hang on, I though people claimed to be able to cleanse auras by, well, waving their hands about. Are you saying they don't do it properly?

[wahrheit]

Absolutely amazing woo copy on that page. We've all read quite a lot of woo balderdash, but this site takes the cake. Everything on their site sounds like generated with some kind of woo idle-talk software.

ETA: http://www.colourschool.com/homeframes.html

Their "school" sounds like good old MLM to me.

[Sir Arthur Mortal Coyle]

I seem to have lost my Aura, I had it earlier on but I took it off to do some gardening, well I didn't want to get it dirty did I!

Anyway if anybody finds a clean humanless Aura, it's mine.

[my_wan]

UNCONDITIONAL
LOVE ESSENCE
helps to build up one’s self-confidence and nurtures a good relationship with oneself (encourages self-worth and self-love) as well as with others. This beautiful Pink Essence is useful to release feelings of aggression and anger. It connects us to be at one with all creation.


Encourages self-love? I don't need a clean aura for that :D

[H3LL]

Anyway if anybody finds a clean humanless Aura, it's mine.

Tut! So careless.

I've found it, but it's a bit beaten up from being blown around.

I've given if a good clean and patched the holes with AURA CLEANSER™.

As today is a Green Day I took the liberty of a quick squirt of green CHAKKRA LIGHT™ to open your energy centres so that they are functioning actively, radiantly and strongly; which should integrate them nicely.

As you're so careless with it and so that you don't lose it again I gave it a thorough soaking in GUARDIAN ANGEL™ to strengthen the auric protective grid. That should keep it safe.

A quick squirt of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE ESSENCE™ wouldn't hurt, because we all need love.

Next time, for safety, make sure you are wearing your RAINBOW DROP JEWELLERY™ when gardening.




:D
.

[H3LL]

Wow!

FREE shipping on all orders over $150 (https://www.chakracompany.com/catalog/images/ban_ship.gif)

ONLY $150...How do they keep it so LOW?

Check out the free gift.....It's a colour chart on a bit of card.

.

[casebro]

Sheese. I thought everybody knew that all you need is a stick of Anal Deodorant from the drug store. It's usually sold as underarm stuff, but if you read the directions, they say "Rub under arms.... push up bottom"....

What?... oh nevermind...

[Big Al]

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/7/7f/Obiwanmindtrick.JPG

"This is not the woo you are looking for. You can go about your business"

"Cleansin' auras ain't like dustin' crops, boy!"

[sackett]

Re post # 7:

Is Sir Alec pinching a roach? Sure looks like it.

[sackett]

From the site:

"UNCONDITIONAL
LOVE ESSENCE
helps to build up one’s self-confidence and nurtures a good relationship with oneself (encourages...self-love).... This beautiful Pink Essence is useful to release feelings...."

(What's WRONG with me today?)

[Dragon]

"Cleansin' auras ain't like dustin' crops, boy!"
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."

[EternalSceptic]

Sheese. I thought everybody knew that all you need is a stick of Anal Deodorant from the drug store. It's usually sold as underarm stuff, but if you read the directions, they say "Rub under arms.... push up bottom"....

What?... oh nevermind...

LMAO. Wait.. i'll neet it to "push up bottom"

[Elizabeth I]

Absolutely amazing woo copy on that page. We've all read quite a lot of woo balderdash, but this site takes the cake. Everything on their site sounds like generated with some kind of woo idle-talk software.

ETA: http://www.colourschool.com/homeframes.html

Their "school" sounds like good old MLM to me.

Roy G. Biv, Dean of Students

[Joe_Black]

I once thought I could see peoples aura's. turned out I was just mildly poisoned by to much caffeen.

[Magyar]

IT's funny this thread came up. I've been in an arugement with someone on another forum about Chi Vampires - yea you read it right - and how they can steal your energy (thus the vampire title, they suck your enegry instead of your blood) and even kill with their chi.

As evidence of such forces he directed me to this lovely site
http://biophysics.50megs.com/index.html

I don't even know how to begin to rebut this arguement. I tried finding info on qi/chi and such but only came up with one thread. I couldn't find anything on how these auras are created etc.

C

[osmosis]

COLOUR ENERGY’S ALCHEMY ESSENCES are created using an Alchemy process that includes coded information from essentialoils, flowers, herbs, crystals, geometric patterns, cosmic vibrations, planetary frequencies and colour.

Huh? Wha?

Duuude.

[bruto]

This one is beyond beyond. It looks as if they used a computerized random woo generator. You could swap nearly any word in it with another of the same type and it wouldn't change a thing. I wonder if they even bothered to read the copy. They sure as hell didn't bother to proofread it.

[my_wan]

This one is beyond beyond. It looks as if they used a computerized random woo generator. You could swap nearly any word in it with another of the same type and it wouldn't change a thing. I wonder if they even bothered to read the copy. They sure as hell didn't bother to proofread it.

Hey now that's an idea. I'll write a randomized woo generator if anybody is interested. Can't think of a good woo word just click here. Auto paste at the cursor and you can even customize you own list of woo words in a flat file.

[thaiboxerken]

Charlie Brown's friend, PigPen, needs this.

[my_wan]

CHAKRA LIGHT ESSENCES alter the memory and accounts of our inner cosmic language, affecting our cosmological and balance levels of thought and cost to facilitate human life to enjoy the exciting new dimensions of riches!

There a bit more honest woo :blush:.

[H3LL]

Hey now that's an idea. I'll write a randomized woo generator if anybody is interested. Can't think of a good woo word just click here. Auto paste at the cursor and you can even customize you own list of woo words in a flat file.

Yes please :)

.

[bruto]

Hey now that's an idea. I'll write a randomized woo generator if anybody is interested. Can't think of a good woo word just click here. Auto paste at the cursor and you can even customize you own list of woo words in a flat file.

It sounds like a grand idea. If you have some woo friends, you can test the theory that it's all interchangeable, like horoscopes or audiophile woo.

[my_wan]

Will do. It'll include source also.

[fuelair]

Dirt could be the least of your problems - your aura could have holes! :eek:

However, help is at hand with the "powerful Aura Cleanser Essence" which

eta - that's some mighty fine woo you found there, H3LL!

I prefer Cthulhus' Colon Cleanser - a chile product of my devising that is 10-15% pureed Habanero. It scrubs out your Aura from the inside so it doesn't miss any of the nooks and crannies that regular cleansers bypass. It goes without saying that you will notice it leaving as the job is completed! (No beans, no tomatos).:D :jaw-dropp :jaw-dropp :jaw-dropp :jaw-dropp :jaw-dropp :D

[fuelair]

Dirt could be the least of your problems - your aura could have holes! :eek:

eta - that's some mighty fine woo you found there, H3LL!

Ahh, a holy Aura, that's another kettle of Fish and Loaves I'm thinkin'!!:D

[Cactus Wren]

GUARDIAN ANGEL
is a powerful vibrational preparation that has been formulated to strengthen the auric protective grid through its influence on all of your subtle bodies. This deeper multidimensional patterning encourages positive energetic response to any intrusive energies. Thus helping to release your consciousness from any negative programmed responses that could be restricting your progress.I believe psychiatrists call this phenomenon "word salad".

[my_wan]

Huh? Wha?

COLOUR ENERGY’S ALCHEMY ESSENCES are created using an Alchemy process that includes coded information from essentialoils, flowers, herbs, crystals, geometric patterns, cosmic vibrations, planetary frequencies and colour.

Duuude.
I'll translate;
coded information = Proprietory blend
geometric patterns = Molecules
cosmic vibrations = Unstable chemicals (check expiration date)
planetary frequencies = incadescence (from the unstable chemicals)

So;
COLOUR ENERGY’S ALCHEMY ESSENCES are created using an Alchemy process that includes proprietary blend from essentialoils, flowers, herbs, crystals, molecules, unstable chemicals, incadescence and colour.

[EternalSceptic]

Hey now that's an idea. I'll write a randomized woo generator if anybody is interested. Can't think of a good woo word just click here. Auto paste at the cursor and you can even customize you own list of woo words in a flat file.

Let me! let me! I _love_ woo programming, especially in C. Be just slightly careless and your code becomes _very_ woo by itself :) :)

[hopfen]

So;
COLOUR ENERGY’S ALCHEMY ESSENCES are created using an Alchemy process that includes proprietary blend from essentialoils, flowers, herbs, crystals, molecules, unstable chemicals, incadescence and colour.


Sodium propionate added to retard spoilage. Best before date on package.

[my_wan]

Let me! let me! I _love_ woo programming, especially in C. Be just slightly careless and your code becomes _very_ woo by itself :) :)

I have no patent on woo, go for it. We can compete for the best woo generator :D.

[Legalduck]

Puzzled why people avoid getting close?

Yes! You've guessed it.

You have a dirty aura. Shame on you.

Oh, and here I was assuming that woman prefer taller, more attractive men over me because of some issues with physical attractiveness. My aura is dirty, that explains everything.

...Just for clarity, we're talking about the "bad" kind of dirty, right;) ?

[qwrty]

isn't this a commercial thread?

[H3LL]

isn't this a commercial thread?

Oh yeeees!

I fully expect most JREF members will be dipping into their wallets and waiting, with baited breath, to have their aura's cleansed and strengthened.

I'm on 10% commission to be paid in Unconditional Love Essence.

I'm such a mercenary.

:D

.

[David Swidler]

Oh yeeees!

I fully expect most JREF members will be dipping into their wallets and waiting, with baited breath, to have their aura's cleansed and strengthened.

I'm on 10% commission to be paid in Unconditional Love Essence.

I'm such a mercenary.

:D

.

If your breath is "baited" then that might better explain why people are avoiding you.

[H3LL]

If your breath is "baited" then that might better explain why people are avoiding you.

It is my attempt to disgust conservative speakers and confuse dictionary writers, apparently (http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-bai1.htm).

The joys of my involvement in change continue unabated and as one rarely to show restraint or moderation, I'll leave if to your good self to master bate and its correct usage.

:D

[H3LL]

Remarkable.

I actually got a reply to my email and it's surprisingly candid:

Hi XXX
Thank you for getting in contact with us and your interest in our products.
I am curious........when you were looking at our web site, what specifically were you looking for?

You like us, know that any alternative therapies have no claims as far as medical field is concerned. Even people that have had cancer cures or any other major remission, can never claim that to be to a particular therapy. In my experience, people just accept that changes have been made, irrespective to a which therapy.

For this reason we choose to not make claims, however we have wonderful testimonials both from clients and therapist that do use our products that I can forward to you, should you wish to read further.

This company had been operating in North America now for 16 years and we have just started the distribution for UK in the last 6 months. It is well supported and well know within it field, being energy through colour. As you must know, energy heals, and that is the claim. It is one of many ways to aid your body in it natural ways of healing by promoting mind and body connection .

I trust this satisfies your question and if you require any further information, we would gladly send you our PDF file of our electronic brochure.

At this stage we do not supply stores as we deal directly with clients and therapist and we have an online store, the address is: www.honey-wells.co.uk (http://www.honey-wells.co.uk/).

Kind regards
Vicky and Lisa
Directors
Colour Energy


.

[H3LL]

PDF brochure available for the terminally curious:

http://www.colourenergy.co.uk/Minibrochure.pdf

.

[wahrheit]

At least a kind reply, happens not too often.

[H3LL]

:D :D :D :D :D :D

Randi read my email and mentioned the site in the commentary.

:D :D :D :D :D :D

.