Harry Potter and the Nerve Of the Bible!

[The Grave]

Who is going to come out on top, Harry or Jesus?

Two of the most famous wizards go head to head in the Battle of the Books....

When HP first blasted onto the screen He was met by the usual brigands calling for more bible bashing and preaching to teach us morals. They complemented young Harry on fighting evil but denounced His use of magic!

And there's the hypocrisy!

It's ok for Mr C to walk on water (a cheap conjurers trick, repeated many times since!), but chew gillyweed and go for a swim and your an evil wizarding devil worshipper.

So how can these bible bashing faithers proclaim their rhetoric with such straight faces and expect the rest of us to play along? In a word EGO!

As Potter himself might say:"RIDICULOUS!"

So who's going to win: Harry or Jesus?

Who's the best wizard?

[The Grave]

"Today saw Harry Potter surge ahead in the opinion polls well on the way to becoming the world's most famous wizard, out performing the rather long-in-the-wand Jesus!"

Harry was quoted as saying:"It was nothing really. I simply seem to have an affect on people".......:)

[Fronzel]

I wonder if there will be a Potterism religion in 1,000 years.


Hell, I wonder if there is a Potterism religion now.

[The Grave]

I wonder if there will be a Potterism religion in 1,000 years.


Hell, I wonder if there is a Potterism religion now.


Blast-femur!

If I die standing on this one good leg of mine for eternity waiting for Lord Potter, it would be worth it!

Well Harry has already got more books out than Jesus...FACT!

Harry is better looking than Jesus...FACT!

I'll stick a golden broom symbol of my faith to Harry Potter on my car.

GRIFF

[Beleth]

Jesus wasn't a wizard! He was a cleric! Probably with an 18 Wisdom.

Harry Potter, probably no more than a 12 or 13 Intelligence. Hermione's the one with the 18 INT.

[Foster Zygote]

Is this a new record?

[Darth Rotor]

Jesus wasn't a wizard! He was a cleric! Probably with an 18 Wisdom.

Harry Potter, probably no more than a 12 or 13 Intelligence. Hermione's the one with the 18 INT.
Ron's the guy you rolled up with nothing over a 12. Dumb dice!

DR

[slingblade]

Thank you for creating a post without a bunch of wacky stuffs.

See? I do notice these things. ;)

[Dorian Gray]

Potter has a 21 luck, though.

Jesus isn't a wizard, he's a lich. How do you think he "came back from the dead"?

[Caius Textor]

Jesus was a Bard with the prestige class "con man".
HP is one of those "peasant 1" char. who stole the gnome´s spell book and tries to make things out.

I´m new here but, wasn´t there supposed to be some sort of "planet X" choice in the poll?

[Fronzel]

Jesus isn't a wizard, he's a lich. How do you think he "came back from the dead"?


Wait... Does this mean Jesus is really Lord Voldemort He Who Must Not Be Named?

[Tanstaafl]

Harry Potter, probably no more than a 12 or 13 Intelligence. Hermione's the one with the 18 INT.


I suppose 18 INT is okay, but let me know when she gets up to 34B, okay?

[KingMerv00]

Harry Potter, probably no more than a 12 or 13 Intelligence. Hermione's the one with the 18 INT.

They are not wizards. They cast too many spells per day. They are clearly Sorcerers. Low Int high Cha.

[grayman]

Harry will win because at least his books admit to being fiction.

[Hokulele]

I voted Jesus for two reasons.

1) I just felt like it.

2) I never knew he was a groupie (did Cheap Trick, get it, get it?).


(I should not post after 17 hour plane trips. Grayman, give me a good 'ole dope slap if you catch me at it again.)

[Bigt]

These are the poll results as of this post:

Harry! He's courageous and modest 13 56.52%
Harry! He's got the best tricks 13 56.52%
Jesus. He did some cheap tricks 2 8.70%
Harry! This was for Jesus but Harry did a spell 4 17.39%

Something is screwy. How did the poll come up with more than 100%

[grayman]

I voted Jesus for two reasons.

1) I just felt like it.

2) I never knew he was a groupie (did Cheap Trick, get it, get it?).


(I should not post after 17 hour plane trips. Grayman, give me a good 'ole dope slap if you catch me at it again.)

Should we ever meet, I shall slap you...and then you slap me...then I grab you aggressively...you growl low and sensual...we stare at each other...breathing low...steady..we move to the...to the...




Sorry, I have to go do something. Be back later.

[Darth Rotor]

I´m new here but, wasn´t there supposed to be some sort of "planet X" choice in the poll?
Yes, there should have been, but the OP rolled a 3 for Int.

DR

[Hokulele]

Should we ever meet, I shall slap you...and then you slap me...then I grab you aggressively...you growl low and sensual...we stare at each other...breathing low...steady..we move to the...to the...




Sorry, I have to go do something. Be back later.


* Grabs hose, sets it to Arctic *

This always seems to happen on a Thursday . . .

[MelBrooksfan]

* Grabs hose, sets it to Arctic *

This always seems to happen on a Thursday . . .

You, too? Er.. the Thursday, thing. Not the hose.

[SoBitter]

Yes, on planet X we have no wizards.

I'm sure there's some spell to make polls total over 100%. We just have to figure out if Jesus did it or HP.

[The Grave]

These are the poll results as of this post:

Harry! He's courageous and modest 13 56.52%
Harry! He's got the best tricks 13 56.52%
Jesus. He did some cheap tricks 2 8.70%
Harry! This was for Jesus but Harry did a spell 4 17.39%

Something is screwy. How did the poll come up with more than 100%


Ah that's the MAGIC of Harry, so that he wins !:D

Griff

[3point14]

* Grabs hose, sets it to Arctic *

This always seems to happen on a Thursday . . .

'I never could get the hang of Thursdays'

[Jon.]

These are the poll results as of this post:

Harry! He's courageous and modest 13 56.52%
Harry! He's got the best tricks 13 56.52%
Jesus. He did some cheap tricks 2 8.70%
Harry! This was for Jesus but Harry did a spell 4 17.39%

Something is screwy. How did the poll come up with more than 100%

The poll allows people to vote for more than one option.

[darnell11]

I love Harry Potter! He's definately more modest; he's never claimed to be the son of god, just the son of James.

[slingblade]

Paulie?

[The Grave]

I love Harry Potter! He's definately more modest; he's never claimed to be the son of god, just the son of James.


What's Harry's mother named? I thought I knew. Is it Lily?:eek:

Griff...After all, without her Harry wouldn't have survived!:)

[Caius Textor]

Without her harry? Her harry what? hehehe

[The Grave]

Without her harry? Her harry what? hehehe


That's what I like about this forum...the different slant on things....

Eerrr, mucky pup!

I'll never be able to watch it again now without thinking of hairy...things.

Griff...Ahh, so that's what this wand is for!

[The Grave]

Does anyone know if....:confused:

Chemical Ali is where Harry Potter buys his potions?:D

Griff...:rolleyes:

[Retrograde]

Harry mostly stands around being *called* a great wizard while Ron or Hermoine (or the twins or Sirius or Cedric or Et Nauseam) do the heavy lifting.

Jesus, on the other hand, changes water into wine and multiplies loaves and fishes. I know who I'm inviting to my next party: I'll never run out of drinks or salmon spread again!

[Caius Textor]

Dude, I don´t think turning perfectly good water into 0 century kosher wine is such a good idea...

[vexed]

Jesus wasn't a wizard! He was a cleric! Probably with an 18 Wisdom.

Harry Potter, probably no more than a 12 or 13 Intelligence. Hermione's the one with the 18 INT.

LOL turn it into an RPG.

[Dorian Gray]

Wait... Does this mean Jesus is really Lord Voldemort He Who Must Not Be Named?Yes. In fact, his followers, the Death Eaters, gather once a year to eat part of his body and drink some of his blood in a cannibalistic ritual.

[Dorian Gray]

What's Harry's mother named? I thought I knew. Is it Lily? Yes, and 'Lily' is short for Lilith.

[Piscivore]

I suppose 18 INT is okay, but let me know when she gets up to 34B, okay?

Are you thinking of Lindsey Lohan's turn on SNL? 'Cause I am. :)

[The Grave]

Saw the 5 th Potter film yesterday... excellent...

He really is the best wizard around.

Griff...

[Darth Rotor]

Who is going to come out on top, Harry or Jesus?

On a board populated by mostly atheists and agnostics? You actually have to ask?

DR

[The Grave]

I never assume!

Griff...

[The Grave]

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS
IS
MORE
POPULAR THAN THE
BIBLE

In just 2 days it's sold 11 Million to become the world record holder!

5.5 million per day, that's 4,000000,000000 if pro rata over 2000 yrs!

Out selling the bible by

A LOT!

[slingblade]

Harry mostly stands around being *called* a great wizard while Ron or Hermoine (or the twins or Sirius or Cedric or Et Nauseam) do the heavy lifting.

Yes, because all the 4th years could make a full patronus after two lessons. :cool:

[quixotecoyote]

I vote for EVERYTHING :dc_tongue:

[Dorian Gray]

* Grabs hose, sets it to Arctic *

This always seems to happen on a Thursday . . .
What hose are you grabbing, and what is 'sets it to Arctic' a euphamism for?