The Greatest Software in the Universe

[Bill Thompson]

Diskeeper is the greatest software in the Universe that is made directly from the teachings of the greatest man who ever lived, L. Ron Hubbard. Just having this software on your computer alone makes it run better and since computer viruses comes from SP's from Xenu, Diskeeper is the best tool to stop anything wrong happening on your computer as well as in your life. It stops the voices in your head too which are cause by thetians which simply run away once they see you have Diskeeper on your computer. Amen.

[jimlintott]

Wow, thanks.

You need to include your address so we know where to send money.

[Bill Thompson]

Wow, thanks.

You need to include your address so we know where to send money.

Since I have been using Diskeeper on my home computer, I have been cured of baldness. Just go to diskeeper's website and try their demo version.

[Schneibster]

Thetans don't cause baldness. They might cause ED though. I suspect that will make a better marketing pitch. You could even put the viagra spammers out of business.

[blobru]

Diskeeper is the greatest software in the Universe that is made directly from the teachings of the greatest man who ever lived, L. Ron Hubbard. ...

You are so right, Bill. It has cured my PC of several negative engrams it acquired during assembly; eg, a tech said "wire the motherboard" mis-heard as "why are the mother bored?" by my PC, which made it feel unloved and crash out of low self esteem. But since Diskeeper, my PC has this glassy, straight-ahead look about it like it could pilot a DC-9 across the galaxy. Praise L. Ron!

*p.s.* & "Battlefield Earth" is the greatest movie ever made, too... (praise T. John)

[Bill Thompson]

Thetans don't cause baldness. They might cause ED though. I suspect that will make a better marketing pitch. You could even put the viagra spammers out of business.

Diskeeper cures ED. I had better be careful. Some might take me seriously and their sales would skyrocket.

They could rename the product by replacing the 's' with a 'c'.

[Rrose Selavy]

http://img402.imageshack.us/img402/2268/xenupamsz5.jpg

[joshbuckley]

Is there anything that Diskeeper doesn't cure?

[Kilgore Trout]

Is there anything that Diskeeper doesn't cure?
Yes, IBS.

[AgeGap]

Is there anything that Diskeeper doesn't cure?

Pottymouthism. "Some people, well, if they don't like Scientology, well, then, **** you. Really. **** you. Period."

[six7s]

Woo vs Woo

Bavaria wants Windows 2000 checked out
(http://www.lermanet.com/cisar/survey/hm.htm)Hamburg, Germany
March 31, 2000
Stern
The Free State of Bavaria will not install the Windows 2000 operating system from Microsoft until the controversial Scientology Organization's involvement with the software has been reviewed.

<snip/>

The defragmentation program, called Diskeeper, was produced by professed Scientologist Craig Jensen's California software firm, Executive Software. After that become known, there was speculation that Scientology could spy upon corporations and individuals in this way. That was dismissed by Microsoft.

Source (http://www.lermanet.com/cisar/survey/hm.htm)

[yairhol]

If we stop with the joking for awhile, is Diskeeper really a good software and does it really do what the company claims it can do?

Regards,
Yair