Worst book you've ever read?

[sorgoth]

Mine would have to be Atlas Shrugged, by Ayn Rand. I think it might have been more interesting if it was in a language I don't understand.

[Hexxenhammer]

I've read a lot of bad books that I never finished, but one I did finish was Jhereg (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0441385540/qid=1062002068/sr=1-38/ref=sr_1_38/103-9109741-6627027?v=glance&s=books) by Stephen Brust. Ugh. Like reading a book about some 14 year old's favorite D&D character.

[Brian]

A book with 3 short stories by Guertude Stein. She has no talent.

[arcticpenguin]

The Tao of Pooh.

[Lord Emsworth]

I'd go with J.P. Sartre's Nausea.

[CFLarsen]

Hitler's "Mein Kampf", hands down. I get a headache every time I open it. It is incredibly muddled, poorly written, completely incoherent.

A monkey could write better. A retarded monkey, that is.

[asthmatic camel]

Moonchild by Aleister Crowley. The very thought of reading this book again tempts me to pluck out my eyes. I'd also consider piercing my eardrums and cutting off my fingers as a precautionary measure lest audio and braille versions should be produced.

Regards,

AC.

[Brian]

Originally posted by Lord Emsworth
I'd go with J.P. Sartre's Nausea.

I admit I never finished it, but I did love the part at the very begining where he's skipping rocks at the beach with children and all of a sudden he feels sick. He's not sure if it was the rock or the ocean that made him sick.

My edition of Mein Kampf translated all of Hitler's run on sentences and grammatical errors. (on purpose)

[Marc]

Hmmm.....

nomonies for me are KJV Bible, Book of Mormon, and one of Sylvia Browne's books.

I would have to say the Book of Mormon then. Sylvia is at least writing in modern language. The Bible is a difficult read, but at least it has some interesting stories and has had a lot of cultural influence. It was interesting to see where some expressions and well known stories came from. The BoM is written not all that long ago, but purposely made to sound 'biblical' and dificult to read. It has had very little if any cultural influence, it is completely made up as opposed to the bible which might contain glimpses of actual people places and events (converted into myth).

[BPSCG]

I tried reading Nietzsche's "Thus Spake Zarathustra" when I was in college and we were all on the "2001" kick. It struck me as raving gibberish even though it was apparently in English. A few weeks ago I mentioned it to a friend and was relieved when he said he'd also found it incomprehensible. And all these years I thought I was intellectually stunted.

Had to read something by Richard Wagner once upon a time. Vast tedious stretches interrupted by pages and pages of stuff you could go crazy trying to understand, even though it was apparently in English. His music can be pretty tedious to the neophyte, also, but it has long stretches of unimaginably beautiful passages (listen to the last twenty minutes or so of "Die Walkure"), interspersed with sex and violence, so you can listen to it repeatedly and finally end up enjoying the whole thing. Too bad his philosophy doesn't have more sex and violence, 'cuz maybe then I'd try rereading it and I could figure out what the hell he was talking about

Then there's Kurt Vonnegut's "Timequake". Here's part of what I said on amazon.com about the first Vonnegut book I never finished:

"But this is what happens when you take a short story (or more accurately, the bits and pieces of a short story) and mix it in a salad bowl with other ideas for a short story, along with some family reminiscences and your general cranky views of life. It starts nowhere, goes nowhere, and although I gave up on it about 3/4 of the way through, I'll bet my next paycheck that it arrives nowhere.

"If you decide to read this mess anyway, ask yourself what would have happened to the manuscript if it had originally arrived on a publisher's desk with your name on it instead of Vonnegut's."

[Brian]

Y'know. I though Timequake sucked, but it didn't suck that bad. A few amusing parts. If you read it to the end you get to find out how Kilgore Trout ends up.

[Segnosaur]

Worst book? Probably Dragonrouge. (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1587153149/qid=/sr=/ref=cm_lm_asin/104-8230171-3486366?v=glance)

I read it many years ago in high school. The thing which sticks out in my mind is how the author solved any problem by magic. Evil dragon attacking? The sword the main character carried has the ability to tame him. Rampaging unicorn? It can somehow be stopped in the group. Of course, all these elements are brought up only when needed; no foreshadowing, no tension.

Almost like being trapped in a midieval version of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

[Hexxenhammer]

In non-fiction, I read large chunks of "The Bell Curve" while simultaneously reading Stephen J Gould's "Mismeasure of Man". Very interesting thing to do.

[BPSCG]

Originally posted by Brian
Y'know. I though Timequake sucked, but it didn't suck that bad. A few amusing parts. If you read it to the end you get to find out how Kilgore Trout ends up.
I just didn't care, by that point. I realized Vonnegut had written himself out years ago when he wrote himself into one of his novels as Trout's creator, had conversations with him, put him on the sun and brought him back again.

Most writers have only a finite number of good books in them. Some keep writing anyway.

[Nyarlathotep]

The worst book I ever read was one called "Neanderthal". It was by some Micheal Chricton wannabe whose name I can't remember.

The basic premise was researchers find a tribe of Neanderthals living in modern day in some remote mountains in Pakistan. It was a promising premise but I won't describe it any further than that in case some poor soul feels masochistic enough to try to read this particular pice of trash. Needless to say, the premise is blown by a predictable storyline and some of the worst writing this side of an eighth grade english class.

[Hexxenhammer]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep
The worst book I ever read was one called "Neanderthal". It was by some Micheal Chricton wannabe whose name I can't remember.
This is one I didn't finish. Terrible! Read "Eaters of the Dead" if you want to read about Neandertals.

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by Hexxenhammer

This is one I didn't finish. Terrible! Read "Eaters of the Dead" if you want to read about Neandertals.

I never read 'Eaters of the Dead' but I saw 'The 13th Warrior" which was, as I recall, based on the book. I know that books are usually better than movies based on them, how did '13th Warrior" Compare?

[Zep]

Anthony Trollope's "The Warden". Compulsory school text, being a story originally published in parts in a gentile Victorian English weekly newspaper.

Soul-crushingly B...O...R...I...N...G...!!!

[EvilYeti]

Fiction:

"The Difference Engine" by William Gibson and Bruce Sterling.

I didn't finish it, but as far I can tell no one else has, including the authors. I gave up halfway through when I realized I had no idea who any of the characters were and what if anything was going on. I thought at one point the plot had been surgicaly removed and nothing but exposition remained. I remember flipping back through earlier parts of the book and not remembering reading them. It was like reading a Philip K. Dick book where I was the main character.

Non(supposedly)-fiction

"Guns, Germs and Steel" by Jared Diamond.

I bought this book at an airport mistakenly thinking it was a history/science book. The entire thing is a long winded diatribe that western culture triumphed over native culture not because it was superior, rather the silly Europeans just got very lucky and were, in fact, inferior to the cultures they conquered.

Total crap. I got about halfway through it and tossed it in the garbage. The fact that it won a Pulizter prize is shocking.

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by EvilYeti
Fiction:

"The Difference Engine" by William Gibson and Bruce Sterling.

I didn't finish it, but as far I can tell no one else has, including the authors. I gave up halfway through when I realized I had no idea who any of the characters were and what if anything was going on. I thought at one point the plot had been surgicaly removed and nothing but exposition remained. I remember flipping back through earlier parts of the book and not remembering reading them. It was like reading a Philip K. Dick book where I was the main character.



Ugh, I read that one too and I remember thinking much the same thing. It was too bad too, because I generally like both authors seperately. Together though, they wrote absolute carp.

[EvilYeti]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep


Ugh, I read that one too and I remember thinking much the same thing. It was too bad too, because I generally like both authors seperately. Together though, they wrote absolute carp.

Its funny, for years I didnt discuss that book as I thought I had some strange learning disability that only surfaced when reading Victorian historical fiction. I finally broached the subject with a friend of mine that turned out to have thought the same thing. We thought of forming a support group! :D

[a_unique_person]

Originally posted by Brian
Y'know. I though Timequake sucked, but it didn't suck that bad. A few amusing parts. If you read it to the end you get to find out how Kilgore Trout ends up.

Gee, is that guy still hanging around KV books. What did happen to him?

[American]

Let's make it: the worst book I was supposed to read.

Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood.


Absolute paranoid nonsense, pseudoscience, a total misunderstanding of technology and economics, nothing but odd political musings. Every sentence I read (as I skipped 20 pages at a time) was pure bull.

Luckily, the thing about Comparative Literature class is that you can skip the lectures, only show up to every other required discussion section, and state the right communist opinions to your TA and in your essays.... and they don't know if you're really a conservative who is pretending to be an angry radical marxist revolutionary.

I have no idea what that book was about, but I passed fine and dandy anyway!

[Brian]

Originally posted by a_unique_person


Gee, is that guy still hanging around KV books. What did happen to him?

If I remember right, Kilgore ended sitting around a campfire with friends, roasting hot dogs and laughing. It was along those lines, and cool in its own way.

[Hexxenhammer]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep


I never read 'Eaters of the Dead' but I saw 'The 13th Warrior" which was, as I recall, based on the book. I know that books are usually better than movies based on them, how did '13th Warrior" Compare?
It's the same for the most part. It's more obvious in the book that it's the "real" story of Beowulf. With the Neandertals taking the place of Grendel and his mom.

[Tony]

"I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" by Maya Angelou.

[hgc]

None of you has truly died and gone to literary Hell until you've read The Alchemist, by Paulo Coelho.

That little bit of tripe is the most boring, repetitive, simplistic, confused, insipid piece of pseudo-spiritual dreck ever put to paper. I dare any of you to read it remain sane!

[diddidit]

The Satanic Verses.

If the ayatollahs hadn't gone and fatwad all over the place, it would have been ignored and faded away into the nothing it deserved. Rushdie should write them a thank-you note for all the publicity he got.

did

[RSLancastr]

The Color Purple, or at least the two chapters I forced myself to read.

[JAR]

The worst novel I read was "Conan the Gladiator" by Leonard Carpenter.

I looked at reviews of the book on Amazon.com and conan.com and I found out that I'm not the only person with a very low opinion of it.

I'm glad it wasn't the first Conan novel I read, because if it was, I would have never read one again.

[JAR]

Originally posted by BPSCG
I tried reading Nietzsche's "Thus Spake Zarathustra" when I was in college and we were all on the "2001" kick. It struck me as raving gibberish even though it was apparently in English. A few weeks ago I mentioned it to a friend and was relieved when he said he'd also found it incomprehensible. And all these years I thought I was intellectually stunted.

Had to read something by Richard Wagner once upon a time. Vast tedious stretches interrupted by pages and pages of stuff you could go crazy trying to understand, even though it was apparently in English. His music can be pretty tedious to the neophyte, also, but it has long stretches of unimaginably beautiful passages (listen to the last twenty minutes or so of "Die Walkure"), interspersed with sex and violence, so you can listen to it repeatedly and finally end up enjoying the whole thing. Too bad his philosophy doesn't have more sex and violence, 'cuz maybe then I'd try rereading it and I could figure out what the hell he was talking about
[snip]
I haven't heard much of Wagner's music but lately I have taken a liking to the music of Richard Strauss, whose music was greatly influenced by Wagner's. He said he was "struck by the lightning of Wagner."

I've been listening to two of his tone poems, those being "Thus Spoke Zarathustra" and "Don Juan" and they're mindblowing stuff.

Laurence Rosenthal was told to imitate Richard Strauss' music when he did the soundtrack for "Clash of the Titans." He definitely succeeded in capturing the style.

[shemp]

The print version of "Debbie Does Dallas" wasn't anywhere near as good as the movie.

[jj]

Originally posted by American
Let's make it: the worst book I was supposed to read.

Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood.


Absolute paranoid nonsense, pseudoscience, a total misunderstanding of technology and economics, nothing but odd political musings. Every sentence I read (as I skipped 20 pages at a time) was pure bull.

Luckily, the thing about Comparative Literature class is that you can skip the lectures, only show up to every other required discussion section, and state the right communist opinions to your TA and in your essays.... and they don't know if you're really a conservative who is pretending to be an angry radical marxist revolutionary.

I have no idea what that book was about, but I passed fine and dandy anyway!

You missed something, 'mercan, it was about your own dreams for your country...

Trolling more, I see.

[jj]

I'm trying to come up with one "worst" here.

Perhaps one of the "Flux and Anchor" series by Chalker, or one of Peter F. Hamilton's possession novels, or "Red Leaves" (the short story by Faulkner), or "The Eyre Affair" by Fford, or the clackers one by Gibson (I forget the name, I tossed the book. I never toss a book, but I tossed that one, I cared as little for the book as the characters), or, hmmm.... that horrid socialist tract my college history prof. made us read (it got me started on understanding rhetorical fallacies and excesses though, it was an inadvertant textbook on the subject), or the psych book written by the psych prof, the one that cost twice as much as all the other books that semester and hadn't a single shred of falsifiability in it, or ...

You know, I can't just pick one. Oh, but I liked 'Jhereg' by Brust, and most of the rest of the series, too. :p

[fhios]

When Nietzche Wept (sp?) by Irving Yallom. This things is just so positive it has something important to say, but it's really just more Updikean twaddle about a middle-aged man contemplating adultery. It would make a good lifetime movie, and I hope no one figures that's a compliment

[Floyt]

Is anyone familiar with The Eye of Argon?
It is reputed to be the worst piece of SF/Fantasy ever written, and in fact the thing is awful in an almost sublime way. Have a look at http://www-users.cs.york.ac.uk/~susan/sf/eyeargon.htm and see if you can go farther than 2 chapters. My stomach lining gave way at about that point :D

cheers
floyt

[sorgoth]

Worst sci-fi/fantasy ever, huh? Apparently you've never read anything by Robert King. It's kind of like the Eye of Argon, exept with less descriptions.

I can't believe I finished entire series by Robert King...probaby the only reason I read those is because I played Magic...and stopped shortly after. The books are that bad.

Edit: Actually, I'm reading the Eye of Argon now...and I finished the first chapter easily, but the second... :rolleyes: What's with him and the word "Lustfully"? 'The vines glowed lustfully.'

What the hell?

[Hexxenhammer]

Just remembered another one I had to read for a class. "Iron John" I think it's the book that started the whole "men's movement" where guys go out in the woods and cry about how women keep them from being men. Big babies. If you want to grow a beard, grow a frickin' beard. Women aren't stopping you from being men! Get over it! I read part of it for a folklore class. I didn't know the class was going to turn into a psycho-sexual politics class. I dropped it.

[Tricky]

The Bible. I saw that it was the best selling book of all time, and I know lots of people who have told me how great it is, but I had a very hard time getting through it. Oh, yeah, it starts out well enough, setting a nice little "alternate universe" scenario, but it just goes downhill from there. I mean, who the frick cares about who begat who and how long they lived? Really, most of these guys don't even figure in the story.

Some of the fables are mildly interesting. That bit with parting the Red Sea had a certain flair, but then the guy tells us not to boil goats. What's that all about?

The whole second half of the book is about this loser who won't fight against authority and apparently just likes to pontificate on lofty stuff. Hell they tell the exact same story at least FOUR TIMES! Come on, dudes, we got it the first time.

However the last chapter is truly surreal. All kinds of weird stuff happening and prophecies and the like. I think the guy wrote this chapter while doing acid. Cool.:cool:

[GroundStrength]

The Scarlet Letter..Uhgh

[jj]

Originally posted by Tricky
However the last chapter is truly surreal. All kinds of weird stuff happening and prophecies and the like. I think the guy wrote this chapter while doing acid. Cool.:cool:

Ergot-tainted Rye, perchance? :wink:

[fhios]

Originally posted by Hexxenhammer
Just remembered another one I had to read for a class. "Iron John" I think it's the book that started the whole "men's movement" where guys go out in the woods and cry about how women keep them from being men. Big babies. If you want to grow a beard, grow a frickin' beard. Women aren't stopping you from being men! Get over it! I read part of it for a folklore class. I didn't know the class was going to turn into a psycho-sexual politics class. I dropped it.

I'm actually going to change mine to Iron John too. I read the thing about ten years ago, originally assuming it to be a satire of some sort. however, when I got to the part where the guy loses his dog, and the narrator says that we lose more "dogs" that way, implying some deeper meaning only through the quotation marks, and I realized that that was actually a bit of humor relief and that it was really taking itself quite seriously. I didn't bother with another word from the thing.

[asthmatic camel]

Originally posted by jj
I'm trying to come up with one "worst" here.

Perhaps one of the "Flux and Anchor" series by Chalker, or one of Peter F. Hamilton's possession novels, or "Red Leaves" (the short story by Faulkner), or "The Eyre Affair" by Fford, or the clackers one by Gibson (I forget the name, I tossed the book. I never toss a book, but I tossed that one, I cared as little for the book as the characters), or, hmmm.... that horrid socialist tract my college history prof. made us read (it got me started on understanding rhetorical fallacies and excesses though, it was an inadvertant textbook on the subject), or the psych book written by the psych prof, the one that cost twice as much as all the other books that semester and hadn't a single shred of falsifiability in it, or ...

You know, I can't just pick one. Oh, but I liked 'Jhereg' by Brust, and most of the rest of the series, too. :p

Peter F. Hamilton's possession novels are masterpieces of modern literature. Alphonse Capone returns to rule the universe. I laughed all the way to the second hand book shop.

Regards,

AC.

[Tricky]

Originally posted by fhios


I'm actually going to change mine to Iron John too. I read the thing about ten years ago, originally assuming it to be a satire of some sort. however, when I got to the part where the guy loses his dog, and the narrator says that we lose more "dogs" that way, implying some deeper meaning only through the quotation marks, and I realized that that was actually a bit of humor relief and that it was really taking itself quite seriously. I didn't bother with another word from the thing.
I never read that. I assumed from the title that it was about a family that was so poor they couldn't afford porcelain bathroom fixtures.

[Peter Jenkins]

Take a plot from each from Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams. Mix liberally while taking a tab of LSD. Write the resultant mess down and then have someone remove any trace of humour from the mix. Pick a title from an automated surrealist title generator.
The result:
Anything by Robert Rankin

'The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse' is the second book by him that I've tried to read. It's also the second book of his, that I haven't been able to get half way through, before succumbing to total boredom with the plot.
Peter

[Charlie Monoxide]

Once I start a book, I will usually slog through till the end. The only book that I read in the last while that I literally trashed after a 100 pages or so is the one by Ray Manzarek (speling?). He was the keyboard player in the Doors. His writing is exactly the way he talks (as I had heard in interviews). Kinda like a west coast, surfer dude-speak, circa late 60's early 70's. Drove me nuts. At least I only paid $5 for the hardcover at Borders.

Charlie (still love the Doors music though) Monoxide

[Rayn]

I have to second GroundStrength's nomination for the Scarlet Letter. Who would think a book about adultery could be so mind-numbingly, soul-crushingly, dull?

[livius drusus]

Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence. It's ridiculous, repetitive, chaotic and boring at the same time and has what is possibly the most numbskulled ending of all time.

[Soapy Sam]

Anything by Heinlein after about 1970.
Or by Stephen Donaldson, ever.
The Book of Mormon has some cool drawings of Aryans besieging and begetting and stuff. Apart from which, the binding was quite nice...

However, I enjoyed "The Difference Engine". How can anyone forget the characters? Most of them are real people. Darwin, Lyell, Ada Lovelace, Babbage. Granted it is far from being the best book by either Gibson or Sterling, but it passed an enjoyable evening.

[Bluegill]

Originally posted by arcticpenguin
The Tao of Pooh.

Oooh, I'd forgotten that one. I can't say it's the worst book, though, because it's so short.

I have to say Most Likely to Succeed by John Dos Passos. I read it sometime in high school. It was super long and pointless. I wish I could go back in time and kick myself for bothering to finish it. Oh, wait, I can still kick myself for bothering to finish it. Ouch.

[arcticpenguin]

Well then how about The Emperor's New Mind by Roger Penrose? It's a very presumptuous title, considering how wrong he was. I can't say that i read the entire thing, it was just too dull.

[arcticpenguin]

Originally posted by EvilYeti

Non(supposedly)-fiction

"Guns, Germs and Steel" by Jared Diamond.

I bought this book at an airport mistakenly thinking it was a history/science book. The entire thing is a long winded diatribe that western culture triumphed over native culture not because it was superior, rather the silly Europeans just got very lucky and were, in fact, inferior to the cultures they conquered.

Total crap. I got about halfway through it and tossed it in the garbage. The fact that it won a Pulizter prize is shocking.
The book had weaknesses, but I don't consider it the worst I've read. It was redundant and repetitive and redundant and repetitive. Also, since his version of why things turned out the way they did is based on a historical experiment with only one trial, it amounts to an anecdote or a 'just-so' story.

[roger]

Sorry, you're all wrong.

The worst book in the world is "Televisionary Oracle" oracle, by that 'free will' astrologer Rob Brezsny.

I was stuck in a tent on the side of a mountain in Nepal waiting to acclimitize to the altitude, and this was all I had to read (left in the tent by another teammate). It was excruciating.


If you don't believe me, here's (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1583940006/ref=lib_dp_TT01/103-6348820-1051857?v=glance&s=books&vi=reader&img=3#reader-link) an excerpt.

And here's a typical, 5-star amazon review:
I loved this book. While entertaining me, it taught me multitudes of lessons that I am still trying to assimilate. One of these lessons is that I must kill the apocalypse by loving it. I am in awe of this concept. While internalizing this dogma, I have learned that the alchemical process of taking in the bad stuff and melting it down to its purest, non-harmful form is truly a means to reach enlightenment. Everything that is perceived as negative has its uses and the energy therein must be harnessed to move forward. This book will change your life. Use it in everyday life, even if it's just to keep the kitchen table from tottering around, and you will notice a difference in your life.

All aboard the woo-woo express!

[Soapy Sam]

AP- You probably only read "The Emperor's New Mind" because you assumed it was about penguins.

I must admit I had forgotten it. For the best really. Why don't people stick to what they are good at?
Somehow, I can't see Richard Dawkins writing a tome on mathematical physics.
Though if he did I suspect it would at least be readable.

[wayrad]

My candidate for World's Worst Book is Aleister Crowley's "Moonchild". Words cannot describe the horror.:eek:

Somebody mentioned "The Eye of Argon" earlier...I have got to put in a plug for Adam Cadre's hilarious MiSTing, found here:
http://www.bmsc.washington.edu/people/merritt/books/Eye_of_Argon.html

[asthmatic camel]

Whoops ! Alzheimers is setting in. Starting to repeat myself. Whoops!.........

[TruthSeeker]

I was recently given "The Four Agreements" as a gift.

This is a painfully bad book. It is simplistic, poorly written, lacking in substance, illogical, insulting and irritating.

Has anyone else read it?

[Linda]

Jean Auel's most recent offering in the Clan of the Cave Bear series was so bad I've forgotten the name of it. I enjoyed the first volumes so much and was eagerly anticipating the new volume. My husband even went out and bought it at retail the first day it came out as I had just come home from the hospital after major surgery and it was a homecoming gift. I finished it just to see if it would ever improve, but it didn't. Apparently Auel was being paid by the word and 300 of the 600 pages were devoted to each character introducing themselves every time they met another character. What a disappointment!

[Diamond]

This might not be popular, but "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" scored some quite low marks with me. I think the author desperately needs an editor (waaaaaay too long) and a sense of humor. If it hadn't been for the first four novels, I wouldn't have bothered finiishing it.

[Peter Jenkins]

I can sympathise, Diamond, But is it "the worst book you ever read"?

Peter

[Some Friggin Guy]

I cannot comment on the book for the movie I am going to talk about (I know I'm bending the rules, but I HAVE TO GET THIS OUT! )

Left Behind.

Not only is it obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda, it's BORING obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda.

I mean, what good is obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda if it's so bad you can't even make fun of it?

[Temporal Renegade]

'Ancient Evenings', by Norman Mailer. Recommended by someone whose opinion I usually trust; they figured, he likes Egyptian stuff, he'd LOVE this!
We're not speaking now....:wink:

[wayrad]

Originally posted by asthmatic camel
Whoops ! Alzheimers is setting in. Starting to repeat myself. Whoops!.........

Does this mean I'm really your sock puppet?:eek:

[Temporal Renegade]

Originally posted by Some Friggin Guy
I cannot comment on the book for the movie I am going to talk about (I know I'm bending the rules, but I HAVE TO GET THIS OUT! )

Left Behind.

Not only is it obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda, it's BORING obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda.

I mean, what good is obvious fundie indoctrination propaganda if it's so bad you can't even make fun of it?

One of the authors of this seminal work was speaking at a church here recently; unfortunately I wasn't available to stop in & hear what he had to say concerning the books...
"Fairy-tales, ghosts, and goblins!" as Mr Hengist said (Star Trek, Wolf In The Fold)

[sorgoth]

Originally posted by wayrad
My candidate for World's Worst Book is Aleister Crowley's "Moonchild". Words cannot describe the horror.:eek:

Somebody mentioned "The Eye of Argon" earlier...I have got to put in a plug for Adam Cadre's hilarious MiSTing, found here:
http://www.bmsc.washington.edu/people/merritt/books/Eye_of_Argon.html


:roll: :roll: :roll: That is HILARIOUS! So...bad...yet so...funny...

[SteveW]

Anything by Carlos Casteneda. They are tremendously bad. I knew some people in college who thought he was some sort of bruja and that the stuff he wrote actually happened.

[Chanileslie]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep
The worst book I ever read was one called "Neanderthal". It was by some Micheal Chricton wannabe whose name I can't remember.

The basic premise was researchers find a tribe of Neanderthals living in modern day in some remote mountains in Pakistan. It was a promising premise but I won't describe it any further than that in case some poor soul feels masochistic enough to try to read this particular pice of trash. Needless to say, the premise is blown by a predictable storyline and some of the worst writing this side of an eighth grade english class.

Hey, you had been warned, but no, you insisted on reading that tripe!! I admit it, it was a bad purchase, but what the hey, live and learn!! :wink8:

[Chanileslie]

Bio of a Space Tyrant by Piers Anthony. I actually had my husband remove that piece of trash from my home. It was the most awful thing I have ever read, and I used to like Piers Anthony. <sigh>

[wayrad]

Originally posted by sorgoth



:roll: :roll: :roll: That is HILARIOUS! So...bad...yet so...funny...

Yup, that "many fauceted scarlet emerald" gets me every time.:roll:

Theis was actually about 16 when he wrote that story, and evidently was much taken with the works of Robert E. Howard. I've heard that he was devastated to learn the fate of his brainchild...reminds me of the Star Wars Kid.

[NoZed Avenger]

Originally posted by Chanileslie
Bio of a Space Tyrant by Piers Anthony. I actually had my husband remove that piece of trash from my home. It was the most awful thing I have ever read, and I used to like Piers Anthony. <sigh>

Ye Gods - I had repressed the horrible memory of forcing my way through this book - but you're right. . . . And it has SEQUELS.

The horror. The horror.

[Dinonychus]

I'll admit right up front that I'm not as well read as most of the people whom have posted in this thread and I tend to pride myself on the fact that what I start, I finish reading. However, the one book I never got past the first chapter on was "Battlefield: Earth". It was so boring that it put me to sleep practically every time I tried to read it!

I am currently reading "The Lord of the Rings" and am stuck somewhere in the second book. Ugh. The movie moved better than the book does. Not that I'm saying it's bad, just that it has its slow points. I was planning on trying to finish the book before the third movie comes out, but I now see that is starting to become highly unlikely.

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by Chanileslie


Hey, you had been warned, but no, you insisted on reading that tripe!! I admit it, it was a bad purchase, but what the hey, live and learn!! :wink8:

Yeah I know, but I am stubborn.

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by Dinonychus

I am currently reading "The Lord of the Rings" and am stuck somewhere in the second book. Ugh. The movie moved better than the book does. Not that I'm saying it's bad, just that it has its slow points. I was planning on trying to finish the book before the third movie comes out, but I now see that is starting to become highly unlikely.

I think the movie is better too. Mostly because it has one thing that the book badly needed.....EDITING!!!!!!!!!!

[Temporal Renegade]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep


I think the movie is better too. Mostly because it has one thing that the book badly needed.....EDITING!!!!!!!!!!

I've still not read LOTR....By the time the final film hits, why bother? :)
Of course someone will disagree, but it does take less time.:roll:

[jj]

Originally posted by Temporal Renegade


I've still not read LOTR....By the time the final film hits, why bother? :)
Of course someone will disagree, but it does take less time.:roll:
Who?

Well, you do miss a lot of interesting detail by watching the movie, and also lose a bit of feeling for the desparation of the situation because various allies show up in the movie that don't in the book.

And who was it gave Arwen the big part? This isn't "Empire Records" :) :D

[Temporal Renegade]

Originally posted by jj

Who?

Well, you do miss a lot of interesting detail by watching the movie, and also lose a bit of feeling for the desparation of the situation because various allies show up in the movie that don't in the book.

And who was it gave Arwen the big part? This isn't "Empire Records" :) :D

That's because of the 'no REAL role-models for girls' thinking the studio probably laid down somewhere along the line; not that I didn't mind seeing her so much in the film, mind you...:)
Besides, I'll read them when I get around to them. I'm still trying to complete my Michael Moorcock collection as it is!

Of course, if it was done exactly like the books, someone might have still said, "It's not the SAME!!!" (Look at the X-Men movies: 'What?!?!? No Spandex!?' 'Logan's too TALL!! Rouge's too YOUNG!!
Patrick Stewart can walk in real life!' geeeze...)

[The Bad Astronomer]

Surprise: Bad Astronomy (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0964513307/qid=1063308287/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_1/102-9931844-8004943?v=glance&s=books&n=507846).

It's not what you think though... :roll:

[Chanileslie]

Originally posted by NoZed Avenger


Ye Gods - I had repressed the horrible memory of forcing my way through this book - but you're right. . . . And it has SEQUELS.

The horror. The horror.

I am very sorry to have imposed the memory of such a horrid book. :-) Of course, you know what they say, misery loves company. :roll:

BTW, Piers Anthony's Fractual Mode books are just as bad. Egads!! I think Piers Anthony's books continue to be printed because people still fondly remember Xanth (before it became overrun by bad puns) and Split Infinity both of which were favorites when I was a child.

[Chanileslie]

Originally posted by Dinonychus
I'll admit right up front that I'm not as well read as most of the people whom have posted in this thread and I tend to pride myself on the fact that what I start, I finish reading. However, the one book I never got past the first chapter on was "Battlefield: Earth". It was so boring that it put me to sleep practically every time I tried to read it!

I am currently reading "The Lord of the Rings" and am stuck somewhere in the second book. Ugh. The movie moved better than the book does. Not that I'm saying it's bad, just that it has its slow points. I was planning on trying to finish the book before the third movie comes out, but I now see that is starting to become highly unlikely.

Battlefield Earth, saw the movie, and am still regretting that!! Couldn't bring myself to read anything by L. Ron Hubbard though.

LOTR, well it was a fine story, it really was, unfortunately, Tolkien needed much, much more editing because he tended to get stuck on the most inconsequential details and it made the story drag terribly much.

[JAR]

Originally posted by BPSCG
I tried reading Nietzsche's "Thus Spake Zarathustra" when I was in college and we were all on the "2001" kick. It struck me as raving gibberish even though it was apparently in English. A few weeks ago I mentioned it to a friend and was relieved when he said he'd also found it incomprehensible. And all these years I thought I was intellectually stunted.
[snip]
I just tried reading "Thus Spoke Zarathustra."

I gave up reading it after the first few pages. I found it incomprehensible and so did my father and my older brother.

The concept of the book is better than the book is itself. It's got a great title.

I'll stick to listening to Richard Strauss' orchestral version of the book instead.

[Hypocolius]

Originally posted by Zep
Anthony Trollope's "The Warden". Compulsory school text, being a story originally published in parts in a gentile Victorian English weekly newspaper.

Soul-crushingly B...O...R...I...N...G...!!!

Actually, The Warden is only the first (and shortest) installment of a six part epic. It is probably the most interesting of the six. Hello... Zep... Zep.. are you OK?

[Hypocolius]

Atlas shrugged by Ayn Rand. Fascist drivel.
Lord of the Flies by William Golding. Just drivel.
Anything by Michael Crichton. The absolute worst popular novelist. He writes screenplays, not novels.
I have started to read The Secret Agent by Joseph Conrad on at least six occasions (I have a family interest in the story) but have never got past the first chapter.

[Astroglide]

I've read a few of the other nominees:

Timequake -- oh yeah, it sucked it long and hard. This was the first thing I read by Vonnegut. I've never even picked up anything else by him.
Guns, Germs, and Steel -- not great, but certainly not the worst thing I've ever read. I got it from Amazon, and don't regret the purchase.
Lord of the Flies -- This was required for some class or the other, so I can't judge it fairly. Still, it wasn't the worst thing i ever read.

Not counting fan fiction/vanity press/etc -- the worst thing I've tried to read (I gave up):
I Will Fear No Evil by RAH.

[kourama]

"Descent of Woman" - a book supporting the "aquatic ape" theory of human evolution.

Has the pace, language and forethought of a drunken usenet post. I'm not kidding! I'll give it to anyone in the T.O. area if you don't believe me.

[Chaos]

Don´t be so hard on Tolkien. After all, he didn´t have thousands of contemporary fantasy authors to copy from. ;)
Though, I admit, LOTR would indeed have profited from editing.

What´s more, without Tolkien, I don´t think we´d have all those other, real good, fantasy authors, like (you may disagree with the list) Eddings, Kerr, Goodkind, Jordan, etc.

Well, the worst I ever read...that´s probably "Faust", by J.W. Goethe. (written in rhyme :eek: )

[rachaella]

I Kissed Dating Goodbye - Joshua Harris
Check it out! (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/1576730360/qid=1063680706/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_1/002-3428198-7276821?v=glance&s=books&n=507846)

[Tesseract]

"Report on Probability A" - by Brian Aldis. THere is no reason to ever read this book. None.

Or "The Moon's Fire-eating Daughter" -by John Myers Myers. Supposed to be a sequel to Silverlock, but impossible to read.

[Wudang]

"The Belly of the Bow" by KJ Parker, vol 2 of The Fencer. The first was pretty good and reminded me of Gemmell but in the second I just cannot bring myself to care about anyone or anything. Some minor interest might be found in the tedious info on how to build a bow but I already know that thanks. It has less emotional interest and character development than "Report on Probability A" which, by the way, serves the excellent purpose of ending a whole field of SF writing by its very existence. I've read it at least 5 times and struggled to read 1/3 of Belly of the Bow.
"This is not a book to be put down lightly. This is a book to be thrown away with great force"
Oh, did I mention his second trilogy is the same? Give the man another try I thought. You need something to read, I said to myself, quite forgetting that I could read the care instructions on my laundry instead.

[lofgoernost]

A waste of paper called The Future and Its Enemies by Virginia Postrel. This book is so illogical it even got my dessicated critical faculties firing.

[Charlie in Dayton]

There are some I've read that are so bad I've forgotten everything (including titles) except a bare smattering of what passed for plot. They seemed to be Oriental-produced potboilers with the mid-40's detective type transplanted to Tokyo (or the environs) in the 60's or so, and solving all sorts of crimes. The use of judo etc was prevalent, instead of the use of 1911A1's, and the overly large-chested beauties of the cover illustrations and the stories all had mammary equipment above and beyond the call of gravity.
Invariably, each of these stories (omigawd -- I remember -- "Kill Me On The Ginza", part of the 'Earl Norman' thrill series...guess that diagnosis of Alzheimer's was wrong) ended with ALL the conflicts wrapped up and resolved in the last two pages (if not the last two paragraphs) with the bad guy meeting some well-deserved but messy end. These books were/are 'Plan 9 From Outer Space' kinda bad. They were like train wrecks...you just couldn't put 'em down. You had to see if they could get worse with each passing chapter...and they could and did...every time...

[Diamond]

Originally posted by The Bad Astronomer
Surprise: Bad Astronomy (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0964513307/qid=1063308287/sr=8-1/ref=sr_8_1/102-9931844-8004943?v=glance&s=books&n=507846).

It's not what you think though... :roll:

BLATENT PLUG BY AUTHOR - ALERT!! MODS!!! MODS!!

:D

[arcticpenguin]

Originally posted by Diamond


BLATENT PLUG BY AUTHOR - ALERT!! MODS!!! MODS!!

:D

Bad Astronomy: A Brief History of Bizarre Theories
by Linda Zimmermann, Joseph Gyscek (Illustrator) (Paperback - February 1995)
I'm quite sure that our Bad Astronomer is not Linda Zimmerman.

[Azazelbird]

I hated "She's Come Undone" by Wally Lamb with the passion of a thousand white hot suns. In all the books I've read I've never seen a main character so deceitful, manipulative, selfish, and shallow who is at the same time presented as someone the reader is supposed to feel sympathy for. If I had a fireplace this would have been one of the first books I would burn. What a sad waste of trees.

And you couldn't pay me to read "Billy Budd" again.

[JAR]

"Lord Jim" by Joseph Conrad would hit my list of books I don't like.

I liked his story "Heart of Darkness" and then I took a shot at "Lord Jim."

It's hard to understand what's going on in the book and to me the story was uninteresting.

[Candace]

Any of the Gor series. Tarnsman of Gor, Barbarians of Gor, Warrior-Kings of Gor, they're all horribly written, cheaply bound, and the ink comes off on your hands! they all revolve around an Earth type planet that's in a Trojan orbit with Earth, constantly on the other side of the sun, where humans decided they like the Hyperborean age of Conan so much, they stayed there. Oh, and there's lots of poorly written S&M nonsense. Lots of women trembling in anticipation of the lash's burning kiss and all that. I don't know why I read more than one of them, I think I plowed my way through about three before I finally just gave up on the lot.

My late husband was just wild about Jerry Ahern's The Survivalist series, which HAD to have been paid for by the word, considering how many times we were treated to the description of the steely eyed protagonist and his pair of matched, bored and magna ported Dektonics with pearl grips and intricate leather holsters....
Can you say overcompensation, boys and girls? I knew you could...

We were assigned to read Tess of the D'Urbervilles in High School, I tried to crack into that book like a safecracker in Fort Knox, but in the end I just settled for taking an imcomplete and getting on with life instead. Thomas Hardy may well have been a leading literary light of the 19th century, but a book where the first 200+ pages is all exposition and scenery? PASS!

[Prospero]

Originally posted by GroundStrength
The Scarlet Letter..Uhgh

I, for one, found it extremely amusing. A great example of why religion and government need to stay the hell away from each other!

However, I would have to say:

Faustus by Thomas Mann
Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Beloved by Toni Morrison

Faustus was absurdly long and empty. The entire novel lacked a necessary conciseness that such topics require (the Faust myth, but a musical composer and only one, possibly resulting from syphillis, scene involving the "devil' with no additional supernaturality).

The Catcher in the Rye is every depressed teenager's anthem in novel form, following Holden Caulfield in his absurd wanderings throughout New York City and his interaction with characters that he is incapable of reacting with in a way characteristic of a normal (or even psychologically imbalanced) human being.

Beloved leaves me speechless. At times I found it obscene, at others trite, always unpleasant. I'm not sure what the purpose of the novel was. Certainly not entertainment.

[Duncan]

I found The Old Man and the Sea to be extremely boring. Now I'm not sure about worst book, storywise, but Jinn is, without question, the worst edited book I have ever read. I have never read a book filled with more typos, run on sentances, past-present tense confusion, missing words, character mix-ups, and pretty much anything else you can think of that would ruin an otherwise good story. I couldn't even finish it. It was that bad. Whoever edited that book should be fired. Awful.

[jallenecs]

Originally posted by Linda
Jean Auel's most recent offering in the Clan of the Cave Bear series was so bad I've forgotten the name of it. I enjoyed the first volumes so much and was eagerly anticipating the new volume. My husband even went out and bought it at retail the first day it came out as I had just come home from the hospital after major surgery and it was a homecoming gift. I finished it just to see if it would ever improve, but it didn't. Apparently Auel was being paid by the word and 300 of the 600 pages were devoted to each character introducing themselves every time they met another character. What a disappointment!

I have to agree. Of course, I really only enjoyed the first as a sort of SF. A dear friend once described the series as "a stone age soap opera" and I can't say I disagree.

With that said, I'm about to commit sacrilege, and skewer a few sacred cows. The books that I enjoyed the least often include books that are considered quite good by everybody else.....

"Gone with the Wind" (Scarlett O'Hara desperately needed a good spanking)

"Grapes of Wrath" (read it, and then excuse yourself for a quick slash at your wrists)

"Four Lords of the Diamond" by Jack Chalker: Look, I'm not a feminist, by any stretch of the imagination, but I was STILL massively offended by his "girls as sex toys" attitude.

90% of Anne McCaffrey's work; the dragons were cute the first couple times, and after that, I wanted to puke.

Selected works by Heinlein (I'm thinking, "Time Enough for Love," "Farnham's Freehold" etc.) Again, you have to be very VERY sexist to get me riled, but these pushed me over the limit.

[Chanileslie]

Originally posted by jallenecs


I have to agree. Of course, I really only enjoyed the first as a sort of SF. A dear friend once described the series as "a stone age soap opera" and I can't say I disagree.

With that said, I'm about to commit sacrilege, and skewer a few sacred cows. The books that I enjoyed the least often include books that are considered quite good by everybody else.....

"Gone with the Wind" (Scarlett O'Hara desperately needed a good spanking)

"Grapes of Wrath" (read it, and then excuse yourself for a quick slash at your wrists)

"Four Lords of the Diamond" by Jack Chalker: Look, I'm not a feminist, by any stretch of the imagination, but I was STILL massively offended by his "girls as sex toys" attitude.

90% of Anne McCaffrey's work; the dragons were cute the first couple times, and after that, I wanted to puke.

Selected works by Heinlein (I'm thinking, "Time Enough for Love," "Farnham's Freehold" etc.) Again, you have to be very VERY sexist to get me riled, but these pushed me over the limit.

Robert Heinlein - I loved his so called juvenile books, but his adult stuff is really really really really bad. I would say much of it is just his rather sick, twisted sexual fantasy. Not that I disagree in any way shape or form with polyamory, I don't. But I do think incest is wrong, wrong, wrong, especially between a parent and a child and yet this shows up in several of his books. It is appalling to me. I still quite enjoy, Have Spacesuite Will Travel, Podaykayn of Mars, Red Planet, Spaceman Jones, etc. - of course all are rather dated, but still a fun read, and they are what drew me into the world of Sci Fi.

Don't get me started on the Dragons of Pern because I loved it, and I admit that I cry everytime I re-read to books and come to the part where Robinton dies. I was saddened though that when Anne McCafferey decided to write the Masterharper of Pern, her story went a little awry, and many of the events in that prequal did not match up with the events and story lines in the original series. I admit, it is still one of my favorite series although I think Anne McCafferey has a hard time writing strong women who don't come out as just plain mean, and that is sad.

[Julia]

Oh, so many bad books, so little time to read. I now have a personal rule that if I am not totally involved in the first 15 pages, I toss it aside and go on to the next.

One of the worst books I've ever read would probably be most any book by F.Scott Fitzgerald. Perhaps Gatsby would be an exception, but the first book I ever threw across a room was one of his. I sometimes wonder if he would have been any better if he had ever written while sober.

[Mr Manifesto]

I think it's a book called "Journey" about a little girl who has to travel across Australia to unlock the secret of her powers while doing battle with evil beings from other dimensions.

Fortuately, it will never see publication. I've deleted it off my hard drive.

[Suezoled]

Anything by Mercedes Lackey. I do like that one of her earlier heroes was an openly gay man who had to defend his country and bear the stigmatism of being feared by his own countrymen because he was gay. On the other hand, her story telling is atrocious, with a constant change in narration, sense of time, tense, explanation. She makes such liberal use of italics, like some people use CAPITAL LETTERS to get their point across. The endings are also disappointing, anticlimatic, if she bothers to put one in.

Tannith Lee had that problem, too; poor storytelling.

[Temporal Renegade]

Originally posted by Duncan
I found The Old Man and the Sea to be extremely boring. Now I'm not sure about worst book, storywise, but Jinn is, without question, the worst edited book I have ever read. I have never read a book filled with more typos, run on sentances, past-present tense confusion, missing words, character mix-ups, and pretty much anything else you can think of that would ruin an otherwise good story. I couldn't even finish it. It was that bad. Whoever edited that book should be fired. Awful.

I had to read this in sixth grade--can you imagine, a group of twelve-year-olds discussing the "Hidden imagery inherant to all of Hemingway's heroes, and why their struggles are all similar?"
Yes, I remember that, because our teacher was one of those self-proclaimed Literay Bohemians who thought EVERYONE should have an appreciation for the Classics, even if he had to drum it into our tiny little skulls. Someone like that, you never forget.
I still can't read any Hemingway, because of this twit.

[mothworm]

Oh shoot. I see someone already got to three of mine, so I'll just second them:

Billy Budd - I read part of this in 10th grade. I think a story may have existed in there somewhere, but you'd need a weed whacker to find it. Never tried anyting else by Melville.

Old Man and the Sea - Another one from school. As someone once said, Hemingway wrote short stories for grown up boys. Yeah, yeah, yeah...the old man symbolizes Christ...big freakin' whoop. I tried another of his books (either A Farewell to Arms or For Whom the Bell Tolls, I can't remember), and although it wasn't as bad as TOMATS, it was completely forgettable.

Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Also from 10th grade. Mostly I recall that the plot hinged on a woman's rape, which she slept through.

Other supposedly classic books that I should have loved:

Walden - Boring beyond belief. Do I really need to know how much Thoreau paid for nails?

Great Expectations - Plot twists! Ooh! It's my firm belief that Dickens was the Danielle Steel of his day. For some reason, I had to read this twice in high school.

Red Badge of Courage - From 6th grade (again, who's picking these for kids?). The tall soldier, the fat soldier, the writer who couldn't be bothered with names, the kid who couldn't give a sh*t.

Why Bad Things Happen to Good People - OK, it's not that this book was bad; I'm mostly just amazed that Christians keep passing it around to the depressed. The book is basically forced to admit that god is either all powerful, but doesn't care if you suffer, or very caring, but unable to stop your suffering-and yet the author still thinks you should believe.

The Story of O - Gag. Porn for snobby lit majors.

Then there was some Stephen King book a friend convinced me to read. I can't remember the title, but it involved a woman finding a spaceship buried in her back yard. Terrible writing, not the least bit scary and the ludicrous ending made me think he'd just finished watching It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad...World.

I've tried to read Ulysses at least three times, but always given up.

I admit that I did love LOTR. It's the only fantasy book I've read, and I loved all the extra stuff that people thought should have been edited out.

[Peach Jr.]

Worst book I've ever read? The list is so long, and mercifully I've forgotten most of them. However, three of them stand out in my mind:

Atlas Shrugged Sorgoth, I feel your pain. I have tried to read this book 6 times and have never made it past the first chapter. The Mr., on the other hand, just raves about it. He read it when he was a teenager and it "changed his life". Oookay.


Catcher in the Rye : I wa forced to read this in my 11th grade English class. Eeew. That's all I can say about it. Endless whining by the most uninteresting narrator in literature, unreadable vernacular...just eeew.

The Book of Acts (KJV Bible - New Testament): Another English assignment, this time for college. It made me into a raving feminist. Unfortunately, the person who assigned writing a critical paper on this book was a Pauline scholar. The paper was just fine, gramatically correct (a miracle for me) but wildly unflattering to Paul.

The only F I ever received in college - I got a D for the course.

[RonSceptic]

I picked up 'In The Light Of Experience' for 30 pence last weekend. It's the autobiography of David Icke. Nuff said.

[Dinonychus]

Originally posted by RonSceptic
I picked up 'In The Light Of Experience' for 30 pence last weekend. It's the autobiography of David Icke. Nuff said.

You paid for it? They should've paid you to take it off thier hands!

[Thanz]

Originally posted by mothworm

Great Expectations - Plot twists! Ooh! It's my firm belief that Dickens was the Danielle Steel of his day. For some reason, I had to read this twice in high school.

I actually fell asleep at a bus stop reading this for high school. Ugh. Exhibit "A" in the argument for why you should never pay authors by the word.

[Gregory]

Originally posted by mothworm
Then there was some Stephen King book a friend convinced me to read. I can't remember the title, but it involved a woman finding a spaceship buried in her back yard. Terrible writing, not the least bit scary and the ludicrous ending made me think he'd just finished watching It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad...World.

Tommyknockers. I usually like King, but I agree that this book is terrible.

[RonSceptic]

Originally posted by Dinonychus


You paid for it? They should've paid you to take it off thier hands!

Well it was for charity, and it's probably worth the money for sheer comedy value.

The funniest part is where Icke reveals the 'difficult decision' he had to make when the great godhead sent him the message that he had to make love to a female psychic.

He explained later to his wife that he was only doing it 'for the good of everyone'. Yeah, right. Apparantly his wife believed him though. Makes you wonder who is the crazy one in that marriage!

Sadly for Icke the woman in question got pregnant and it all got very very ugly.

[Whomp]

Brilliant Career Moves by Marv Albert

HeeHee

:bricks:

[The Whether Man]

The worst book I ever read was called "They do it with Mirrors - a Jana Blake Mystery". Well, I think it was. I remember it being printed on really cheap paper with a sort of anti-anti-lesbianism theme.

Books I didn't like were Heinlein's "Job - A Comedy of Justice" and "The Cat Who Walks Through Walls". I got the impression he was just trying too hard. And as for Pirsig's "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", well, it never helped any with my GN250.

[Flame]

Breaking Smiths Quarter Horse (Paul St Pierre) is a book I was supposed to read for grade 11 english. I never got past chapter two at the time and as an adult I found it and decided to read it. Turns out I was intuitive rather than lazy ... what a piece of crap - borrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiinnnnnnngggggggg!
Canadian literary classic my arse :mad:

I think the lesson there was about how sometimes we are told to do things we aren't going to like (not that I'm known to do as I'm told!)

I was surprised to see that some didn't like Catcher in the rye... I thought it was quite funny. Haven't read it since I was an apathetic teenager though

:roll:

[Temporal Renegade]

I just realized something...no matter what your choice for worst book you've read, it's probably high up on the list of someone else, and vice-versa. God, that's scary...:eek:

[Nyarlathotep]

Earlier i said "Neanderthal" by John Darnton was the worst book I ever read. Today I saw another book by him and in big letters it said "From the Author of Neanderthal!"

To me that's like seeing a movie trailer tht starts witht he words "From the team that brought you Gigli"........

[Temporal Renegade]

"Gigli", from the mind of horror-master HP Lovecraft...A man, a woman, and a story so diabolical, NO ONE will be seated during the last ten minutes!!!!
(Or the last 60 or so minutes, as they've all gotten up & left).

[Nyarlathotep]

Originally posted by Temporal Renegade
"Gigli", from the mind of horror-master HP Lovecraft...A man, a woman, and a story so diabolical, NO ONE will be seated during the last ten minutes!!!!
(Or the last 60 or so minutes, as they've all gotten up & left).

A Lovecraftian inspired sequel to Gigli might be pretty good. Mostly because if it stayed true to Lovecraft's style, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez would end the movie either gibbering mad or having been eaten. Who wouldn't want to see that? I think I have a screenplay to write.

[DoNotDisturb]

The Jungle (forgot the author, thats how bad it was to me).

[Temporal Renegade]

Originally posted by Nyarlathotep


A Lovecraftian inspired sequel to Gigli might be pretty good. Mostly because if it stayed true to Lovecraft's style, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez would end the movie either gibbering mad or having been eaten. Who wouldn't want to see that? I think I have a screenplay to write.

At The Mountains Of Gigli...
The Gigli Over Innsmouth...
The Strange Case Of Charles Dexter Gigli...
The Call Of Cgigli...

Gods, It's ENDLESS!!