Story & question on the use of my "psychic powers"

[ObscureReferenceMan]

On Friday, I met some friends for lunch. A few minutes after we sat down, a waitress (not ours) stopped by our table with a Styrofoam container, and said, "Here you go". We all kind of looked at each other, blankly. Then looked into the container. It was a dessert. We tried to flag down this waitress, but couldn't get her attention. Another waitress (Linda) saw our attempts, and asked if she could help. We told Linda we were trying to get "that waitress", and she said "Oh, that's Chanelle. I'll get her". So, Chanelle came over, and we told her that the dessert was not ours. It turns out it was for the table next to ours. No harm no foul. Everything's fine.

We finished our lunch. As we are getting ready to leave, Chanelle is in our area, so I say "Good bye, Chanelle!" She looks at me, amazed, and says, "How did you know my name?" I couldn't help myself, and said, "I'm psychic." Here's how the story continued…
Chanelle: No, really.
Me: Really. I'm psychic. I can just tell things about people. Let me see... You have a relative that passed away. I'm getting a name with a "J".
Chanelle: Uh…
Me: Think about it.
Chanelle: Oh! My Grandmother!
Me: Yes.
Chanelle: How did you know that?
Me: I told you. I'm psychic.
Chanelle: Oh my God! That's amazing!
Me: I'm just kidding, Chanelle. Linda told me your name.
Chanelle: But how did you know about my Grandmother?
Me: That was just something called "cold reading". It's a trick. I never told you about your Grandmother, I just said a letter. You made the connection.

Long story short, we talked briefly about psychics (John Edward and Silvia Brown). She seemed to be a "believer", but I tried to quickly give her the lowdown on psychics/mediums. Even dropped stopsilviabrown.com for good measure. I don't know if I changed her mind or not. I've considered going back, say, to try doing a little Forer effect for her, in an effort to teach a little more about critical thinking.

I have done this before, but I usually stop right away and come clean. But this got me wondering… Maybe I should try doing a few minutes of cold reading, educated guessing, and Forerizing (it's a word!). And then after 10-15 minutes of stringing the person along, THEN come clean, and say "What you've experienced is a trick. There are no psychics, mediums, channelers. It's all tricks, clever guess work and confirmation bias at work. Etc." (of course, I'd say more than "etc.")

I mentioned this to a couple of the friends I had lunch with, and now I'll ask you all… Is this a worthwhile "act" to consider? I've often been tempted to try the psychic powers routine, but didn't think I'd be able to do it effectively. But this experience (and the tale told by Kari Coleman in a 1998 issue of Swift (http://www.randi.org/pdf/swift2-34.pdf)) makes me think otherwise. So, do you think it's a good idea? Or would it be to "cruel" – giving hope to a true believer, then dashing those hopes. I think, if done properly (with tact, no mocking or preaching) it would have the potential for converting believers or winning over fence sitters.

[-Fran-]

I've done a similar thing on a very few occasions, only to have the person in question come to the conclusion that "my psychic powers must scare me, so that I have to pretend it's a trick to deal with it." :rolleyes:

I guess it would work with the fence sitters (as you mention) and with people who haven't give it much thought at all. The real hardcore believers though will still believe and rationalize it until the cows come home.

[ExMinister]

Could be fun and even helpful in some cases, but you'd run the risk of embarassing people. Some people might have a sense of humor and be impressed. Some might be offended, especially if there are other people around to witness them being duped. I'm all for teaching people to think critically and learn about cold reading, though.

And knowing some of the people I know, there will be those who will think you just don't realize how psychic you actually are! :)

[Denver]

I wouldn't recommend 'teaching' in this way. It could backfire in a number of ways.

For one thing, part of the psychology of the situation is that the client believes the reader is there to help them, and is often cooperating in the reading, to the point of minimizing misses and emphasizing lukewarm-hits, since the client has a vested interest in the reading being 'successful'.

If you're just playing around, that environment of caring would be minimized or absent. The client could pick up on that, and be much less cooperative. This could have the effect of proving that 'real' readers can't be faked.

And there is of course the possibility that you would cause them to pull some very painful memories up, since this can be a sort of rorschach exercise in psychoanalysis.

Better to announce beforehand your intention, and then do the reading for them under a completely truthful situation. And be ready to explain well afterwards, how the 'hits' happened, and perhaps where to go read more.

[sgf8]

I think the way you handled it with the waitress was nicely done. 10 or 15 minutes of a routine would get strange, and you might really start messing up, plus you could get them to admit a bunch of bad memories. What if you put out a letter and the person said "that must be my twin brother who shot himself because of a nasty divorce." I mean, what do you say to that, add to that she probably burst into tears by now.

I think it would be fun to do with some people, maybe only for a minute or two but you would have to play it by ear and cut it off quickly if it started to get serious.

Actually if you didn't touch on anyone dead, like just knowing someones name as you did with the waitress was okay, but no dead people.

I think if you told them ahead of time that your messing around, "but let me see if I can fool you" then show them how it works.

That would be fun and educational. Write down the SSB site on something they won't throw away.

Susan

[panchov]

I still think they believe because they want/need to and nothing you do is going to stop them. I've brought this up before - the Benny Hinn thing - he ADMITTED he was faking healings, yet people still pay him to heal them. Freaky. I'm sure he's not the only one, just the only one I can think of at the moment.

[Fnord]

Okay, so you can impress a waitress. But did it get you a free meal? Or a date? :p

Seriously, though; it's sometimes too easy. Like the time I overheard a speakerphone conversation between the woman in the next cubicle and a friend of mine, who mentioned that she forgot her lunch and didn't have time to get one for herself.

I hit the deli next door, bought her a salad and a diet soda (her usual), and then delivered them to her.

"How did you know?"

"I saw your picture on the corporate website, and felt an emptiness in my stomach."

"... amazing!"

"Don't tell anyone, but I've been able to do this since childhood, and..."

The woman she had been talking to came downstairs. My friend explained what had happened (despite my request). Not only did the woman from the next cube seem astonished that a "real psychic" worked next to her, but she even refused to believe that I had overheard the phone conversation because (she claimed) she never used the speakerphone!

As the rumor spread, the more I denied it. The more I denied it, the more the rumor spread. It got to the point that whatever I did was somehow related to being "psychic."

She: "Did you see your horoscope today?"
Me: "I never read those things ... waste of time."
She: "I can imagine! You can prolly see more with your eyes closed!"
Me: "Well, it's not like that..."
She: "Close your eyes and tell me what you see about me."

I tell ya, if I didn't have a conscience ...

[grayman]

I tell ya, if I didn't have a conscience ...

Eh, consciences are over-rated anyway. ;)

[ObscureReferenceMan]

Thanks for the feedback!

I'm still undecided. Even though there is a danger, I'm leaning towards wanting to try it. But still, I would feel very badly if I unearthed difficult emotions. Yet... I think if the explanation afterward was well thought out, and carefully worded, this would be a good way to reach people.

Also, I'm not actively trolling for "clients", so I think some of the risk would be minimalized. And maybe keeping things away from dead relatives is a good idea as well.

Please, keep the suggestions coming! (I've got to go to work. Will check back later. Thanks, again!)

[Big Les]

Firstly, thanks for the great story. As to what to do next, I'd just say that if I had the talent and the confidence, I would definitely do this, so I say go for it. Sure, the hardcore believers will believe no matter what you say afterward, but an awful lot of people who just haven't thought much about it either way will effectively be "innoculated" against future cold reading attempts by actual fraudy types.

[TubeMonkey]

I would have serious reservations about doing this, as some people will take the most predictable statements as proof of psychic powers, instead of the proof of how easy it is to make correct predictions.

A couple of days ago while working (the Underground/tube), a man approached me with a confused look on his face. He was on the platform for the airport, and trundling a roller-case behind him. As normal I said "Heathrow train? It should be the next but one on this platform." He: "How can you tell, It's the suitcase isn't it?" So he KNEW!. I (very jokily) said, "No, I'm psychic, ha ha." He laughed, until an announcement informed every one that the next but one train was going to be going to the airport. All of a sudden his face got serious, and he shook my hand, and said, "I'm sorry, I didn't realise. I'm a psychic and spiritual healer too."

I would love to be quicker thinking, and believe me, I thought of some great comebacks later, but at the time I just smiled weakly and then ran away laughing. I think he was probably completely convinced of my powers. At least until the next 5 trains came in, not one of them being destined for the airport. Predicting when a Piccadilly line train will actually come in on time, going to the place it should, will, I think, be harder than proving the existence of god.

[VulcanWay]

ROFL
I tell ya, if I didn't have a conscience ...
You're a good man, Charlie Brown...

[NobbyNobbs]

As the rumor spread, the more I denied it. The more I denied it, the more the rumor spread.

It seems that a sure way to be taken for psychic is to deny it.

I once played this trick on a friend at summer camp. We got into a debate on psychic powers. She was a true believer, and I didn't believe a word of it. So I asked her (knowing full well what one probable answer might be), "How can you tell if someone's psychic?" She said that a psychic will be able to predict the next card in a deck more often than a normal person.

I had anticipated this response. I just happened to have a deck of (marked) cards in my cabin. She shuffled, and one at a time we went through the deck. I was careful not to get too many right, maybe one out of 6 or 7. The entire time, I denied vehemently that I was not psychic. The more I denied it, and the more cards I got right, the more she believed.

Afterwards, I showed her the markings on the cards. It ruined poker night for the rest of the summer.

[NobbyNobbs]

double post

[Fnord]

ROFL

You're a good man, Charlie Brown...


"If only you weren't so wishy-washy!" -- Lucy Van Pelt.

:D

[RSLancastr]

I still think they believe because they want/need to and nothing you do is going to stop them.Yes, there will always be those who will continue to believe regardless of the evidence. But not all.

Before I started the SSB site, there were those who said pretty much the same thing - that the site would be a waste of time. But there are those who are "on the fence" about such a subject, and even those who consider themselves "dyed in the wool" believers in a subject, who will respond to compelling evidence.

And in the exchange described in the OP, there was no way for ORM to know how firmly (if at all) the waitress believed in psychics. The hope is that the next time she sees someone who claims to be psychic, she will think "wait a minute - that guy in the restaurant fooled me pretty easily. Maybe that is what this person is doing too..."

[Darth Rotor]

She: "Did you see your horoscope today?"
Me: "I never read those things ... waste of time."
She: "I can imagine! You can prolly see more with your eyes closed!"
Me: "Well, it's not like that..."
She: "Close your eyes and tell me what you see about me."

I tell ya, if I didn't have a conscience ...
I can fill in the blanks with a story that will light up the Penthouse letters column (do they still have one?) and make the pages unstick.

I suspect that she has always liked you, and finally found a way to shower you with attention.

Who's woo is at work here, Fnord? ;)

To the OP: with great power comes great responsibility, as some rubes protest.

Sounds to me like you have a gift of charisma and BS. Yay!

Milk it for what it's worth, but with an eye toward unintended consequences. Sounds like fun, if undertaken with fun in mind. The more sinister the motives, the more likely the backlash being nasty.

Don't ask me how I know. Nor about tarot cards.

DR

[ObscureReferenceMan]

And in the exchange described in the OP, there was no way for ORM to know how firmly (if at all) the waitress believed in psychics. The hope is that the next time she sees someone who claims to be psychic, she will think "wait a minute - that guy in the restaurant fooled me pretty easily. Maybe that is what this person is doing too..."


That's my hope, RSL. Well said.

[ObscureReferenceMan]

Sounds to me like you have a gift of charisma and BS.



True indeed!