Whittington Shoots Cheney!

Mephisto · 17th February 2006, 07:52 AM

I've been involved in a few discussions about the inadequacies of the VP's idea of hunter's safety and someone brought up the question (which I'm sure several people here have already considered), "What would have happened had Whittington been the one to shoot Cheney?"

Most people agreed that he would have been dead in the field for an apparent assassination attempt, but even if the SS hadn't "neutralized the threat" would the incident have gone over 18 hours without being reported? Would Faux News still have downplayed the seriousness of the incident? Would we be subject to 24 hour news coverage on the condition of the VP, complete with diagrams, CSI-type animations showing the bullet's (or pellets) pathway through his tons of body fat, surgeon's comments, X-Rays, MRIs, ballistic expert's testimony and an hourly Toxicologist's report regarding the danger of lead in the bloodstream?

Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove?

fishbob · 17th February 2006, 09:06 AM

The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.

Cleon · 17th February 2006, 09:08 AM

Originally Posted by fishbob

The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.

Bull puckey! According to the fine documentary Shaun of the Dead, you merely have to shoot them in the head.

Ziggurat · 17th February 2006, 09:13 AM

Originally Posted by fishbob

The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.

Depends on the undead. Zombies are (haven't you seen Dawn of the Dead?), though you have to blow their brains out. Vampires are not (or at least, not to lead or steel shot, though maybe to silver). I'm not sure about mummies, ghasts, wights, etc. What kind of undead would Cheney be? I think you can't really determine his vulnerability until you determine that.

Tirdun · 17th February 2006, 09:20 AM

I don't think a few dozen bird pellets count as a head shot.

My extensive zombie research shows that significant damage has to occur within the brain in order to bring down most zombies. They can also be destroyed through extensive damage, essentially reducing their zombie bodies to non-functioning parts, although some criticize this method as being both sloppy and time-consuming. It is also hard to tell when the dismantling is complete unless the body has been obliterated.

Manny · 17th February 2006, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by Mephisto

Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove?

Gitmo. Definitely Gitmo.

Mark · 17th February 2006, 09:36 AM

Originally Posted by fishbob

The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.

Belz... · 17th February 2006, 09:37 AM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

Depends on the undead. Zombies are (haven't you seen Dawn of the Dead?), though you have to blow their brains out. Vampires are not (or at least, not to lead or steel shot, though maybe to silver). I'm not sure about mummies, ghasts, wights, etc. What kind of undead would Cheney be? I think you can't really determine his vulnerability until you determine that.

Really. If you've seen RETURN of the living dead, you'd know by now that true zombies CANNOT be killed. Not even by nukes.

Mark · 17th February 2006, 09:38 AM

Originally Posted by Belz...

Really. If you've seen RETURN of the living dead, you'd know by now that true zombies CANNOT be killed. Not even by nukes.

Worse...nukes only spread the spores!

Ziggurat · 17th February 2006, 09:46 AM

We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc.

Belz... · 17th February 2006, 09:48 AM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity.

"SEND MORE PARAMEDICS!"

Mark · 17th February 2006, 09:54 AM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc.

OK, but the first time I hear him mutter "brains," I am calling Clu Gallagher.

JPK · 17th February 2006, 10:19 AM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc.

Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire.
JPK

Jorghnassen · 17th February 2006, 10:21 AM

No, Cheney's no undead (and certainly not a zombie). Cyborg is closer to it. Or maybe some sort of golem...

you-too · 17th February 2006, 10:25 AM

Guns don't kill people...

TragicMonkey · 17th February 2006, 11:36 AM

I just saw a headline on Yahoo News: "Man shot by Cheney leaving hospital". I was struck by a mental image of Cheney, emerging from a hospital's main entrance, grabbing a gun and blasting some random guy standing there. Perhaps the incident of the hunting accident was just a symptom of a greater problem? Maybe Cheney's got an addictive compulsion to shooting people? Maybe from now on, when we see him at podiums, we'll see his fists clench as he tries to fight the urge to shoot people. "Must....restrain....killing....spree!"

Ziggurat · 17th February 2006, 11:36 AM

Originally Posted by Jorghnassen

No, Cheney's no undead (and certainly not a zombie). Cyborg is closer to it. Or maybe some sort of golem...

Maybe an invisible Israeli lesbian robot?

"According to a recent poll, nearly 90% of the Arab world believes that some years ago, Egyptian president Hosni Mubarek, Saddam Hussein, and the sultan of Brunei were kidnapped by the CIA and replaced wih Israeli look-alikes. And that later, these look-alikes were killed and replaced by Israeli robots, one of which is a lesbian robot. Aso, one of the robots is invisible. Let me just say that this is at best a gross oversimplification of the truth."
- Will Ferrell as President Bush, SNL

Ziggurat · 17th February 2006, 11:39 AM

Originally Posted by TragicMonkey

I just saw a headline on Yahoo News: "Man shot by Cheney leaving hospital". I was struck by a mental image of Cheney, emerging from a hospital's main entrance, grabbing a gun and blasting some random guy standing there.

Hmmm... the picture I got was of Cheney waiting in ambush outside the hospital, so that some poor shmuck who's just been discharged gets gunned down as he walks out the door.

TragicMonkey · 17th February 2006, 11:41 AM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

Hmmm... the picture I got was of Cheney waiting in ambush outside the hospital, so that some poor shmuck who's just been discharged gets gunned down as he walks out the door.

Well, maybe he wants to finish the job on what's-his-face.

Ed · 17th February 2006, 11:47 AM

Originally Posted by JPK

Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire.
JPK

Have you personally seen him in the daylight? I think not.

Mephisto · 17th February 2006, 01:32 PM

Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day!

Ziggurat · 17th February 2006, 01:40 PM

Originally Posted by Mephisto

Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day!

Don't thank us, thank Cheney

Ed · 17th February 2006, 01:45 PM

Originally Posted by Mephisto

Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day!

If the SOB didn't have a WMD it wouldn't have been OK. SEE?

zakur · 17th February 2006, 01:45 PM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

Don't thank us, thank Cheney

And be sure to wear orange.

Ed · 17th February 2006, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

Don't thank us, thank Cheney

It is sorta scarey that he is only funny when he shoots someone.

TragicMonkey · 17th February 2006, 01:46 PM

I just had a brilliant idea:

Grand Theft Auto: Vice Presidency

More guns. More violence. More ho's.

Manny · 17th February 2006, 01:47 PM

Geez, did you guys see he was shooting a Perazzi? I swear, give a guy thirty million bucks or so and make him Vice President and all of a sudden he thinks he's special, what with the fancy guns and all.

Skeptic · 17th February 2006, 01:53 PM

Originally Posted by Ziggurat

We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc.

That might explain where the "undisclosed location" is. Transilvenia, I presume?

FreeChile · 17th February 2006, 02:11 PM

Originally Posted by Mephisto

I've been involved in a few discussions about the inadequacies of the VP's idea of hunter's safety and someone brought up the question (which I'm sure several people here have already considered), "What would have happened had Whittington been the one to shoot Cheney?"

Most people agreed that he would have been dead in the field for an apparent assassination attempt, but even if the SS hadn't "neutralized the threat" would the incident have gone over 18 hours without being reported? Would Faux News still have downplayed the seriousness of the incident? Would we be subject to 24 hour news coverage on the condition of the VP, complete with diagrams, CSI-type animations showing the bullet's (or pellets) pathway through his tons of body fat, surgeon's comments, X-Rays, MRIs, ballistic expert's testimony and an hourly Toxicologist's report regarding the danger of lead in the bloodstream?

Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove?

Well, if he had actually died and the bullet had actually rickocheted and hit Bush, and he had died, we would've ended up with the speaker of the house for President.

Ed · 17th February 2006, 03:02 PM

Originally Posted by FreeChile

Well, if he had actually died and the bullet had actually rickocheted and hit Bush, and he had died, we would've ended up with the speaker of the house for President.

Unless Chaney and Bush are both zombies.

www.zombo.com

President Bush · 17th February 2006, 10:11 PM

Originally Posted by JPK

Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire.

Quote:

... he speaks for the werewolf in us... a foul caricature of himself, a man with no soul, no inner convictions, with the integrity of a hyena and the style of a poison toad. I couldn’t imagine him laughing at anything except maybe a paraplegic who wanted to vote Democratic but couldn’t quite reach the lever on the voting machine.

Mephisto · 18th February 2006, 06:34 AM

Originally Posted by President Bush

Are those Hunter's words regarding Cheney? They could just as easily have fit Nixon and I'd certainly like to believe that Dr. Thompson had some pretty funny opinions about Cheney, but when you consider criminal, Republican politicians, these words seem interchangable.

Mephisto · 18th February 2006, 06:38 AM

Originally Posted by TragicMonkey

I just had a brilliant idea:

Grand Theft Auto: Vice Presidency

More guns. More violence. More ho's.

OR - you could get Grand Theft Auto - The Presidential Version where the culprit is no longer satisfied with local carjackings and instead turns to hijacking an entire country to take it on a shooting spree in another country, complete with BIGGER guns, violence on a grand scale and the Ho's wear gunney sacks.

RandFan · 18th February 2006, 09:18 AM

Originally Posted by you-too

Guns don't kill people...

No, some dick with a shotgun does.

TragicMonkey · 18th February 2006, 09:53 AM

Originally Posted by Mephisto

OR - you could get Grand Theft Auto - The Presidential Version where the culprit is no longer satisfied with local carjackings and instead turns to hijacking an entire country to take it on a shooting spree in another country, complete with BIGGER guns, violence on a grand scale and the Ho's wear gunney sacks.

They already have that game. It's called "Mary Kate And Ashley's Slumber Party Jihad". Rated M for all the swearing those girls do.

delphi_ote · 18th February 2006, 10:28 AM

Originally Posted by TragicMonkey

They already have that game. It's called "Mary Kate And Ashley's Slumber Party Jihad". Rated M for all the swearing those girls do.

And the lesbian shower scene... oh no. I've said too much!

RandFan · 18th February 2006, 12:30 PM

Originally Posted by delphi_ote

And the lesbian shower scene... oh no. I've said too much!

Man I've got to stay away from the politics forum. It's not a healthy place for such a decent and morally upstanding pervert as me.

JPK · 18th February 2006, 01:47 PM

Good afternoon.

Originally Posted by Ed

Have you personally seen him in the daylight? I think not.

Point taken. Only on TV. And you would know this if you saw me and noticed a lack of powder burns and pellet scars.
The only Presidents and V.P.s I've actually met in person were Ronald R. and his V.P. George B. Not Vampires, but quite possibly Reptilians.

JPK

Kerberos · 19th February 2006, 12:03 AM

Originally Posted by Ed

Unless Chaney and Bush are both zombies.

www.zombo.com

Bush isn't qualified to be a zombie, he can't pronounce "BRAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNSSSSS".

Mephisto · 19th February 2006, 09:17 AM

Originally Posted by RandFan

Man I've got to stay away from the politics forum. It's not a healthy place for such a decent and morally upstanding pervert as me.

You'll be sad to know that you fit right in RF!

17th February 2006, 07:52 AM	#1
Mephisto Philosopher Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: in a state of disbelief Posts: 6,065	Whittington Shoots Cheney! I've been involved in a few discussions about the inadequacies of the VP's idea of hunter's safety and someone brought up the question (which I'm sure several people here have already considered), "What would have happened had Whittington been the one to shoot Cheney?" Most people agreed that he would have been dead in the field for an apparent assassination attempt, but even if the SS hadn't "neutralized the threat" would the incident have gone over 18 hours without being reported? Would Faux News still have downplayed the seriousness of the incident? Would we be subject to 24 hour news coverage on the condition of the VP, complete with diagrams, CSI-type animations showing the bullet's (or pellets) pathway through his tons of body fat, surgeon's comments, X-Rays, MRIs, ballistic expert's testimony and an hourly Toxicologist's report regarding the danger of lead in the bloodstream? Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove?
	__________________ "What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?" Mahatma Gandhi

17th February 2006, 09:06 AM	#2
fishbob Seasonally Disaffected Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Chilly Undieville Posts: 5,667	The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.
	__________________ When you believe in things you don't understand, then you suffer . . . " - Stevie Wonder "Stupidity - a callow indifference to facts or data" - Stuart Firestein -neuroscientist. I hate bigots.

17th February 2006, 09:08 AM	#3
Cleon King of the Pod People Moderator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Atlanta, GA Posts: 20,532	Originally Posted by fishbob The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns. Bull puckey! According to the fine documentary Shaun of the Dead, you merely have to shoot them in the head.
	__________________ "People like me are what stand between us and Auschwitz." - Newt Gingrich

17th February 2006, 09:13 AM	#4
Ziggurat Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 26,200	Originally Posted by fishbob The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns. Depends on the undead. Zombies are (haven't you seen Dawn of the Dead?), though you have to blow their brains out. Vampires are not (or at least, not to lead or steel shot, though maybe to silver). I'm not sure about mummies, ghasts, wights, etc. What kind of undead would Cheney be? I think you can't really determine his vulnerability until you determine that.
	__________________ "As long as it is admitted that the law may be diverted from its true purpose -- that it may violate property instead of protecting it -- then everyone will want to participate in making the law, either to protect himself against plunder or to use it for plunder. Political questions will always be prejudicial, dominant, and all-absorbing. There will be fighting at the door of the Legislative Palace, and the struggle within will be no less furious." - Bastiat, The Law

17th February 2006, 09:20 AM	#5
Tirdun Muse Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Near DC, in an underground NWO bunker Posts: 637	I don't think a few dozen bird pellets count as a head shot. My extensive zombie research shows that significant damage has to occur within the brain in order to bring down most zombies. They can also be destroyed through extensive damage, essentially reducing their zombie bodies to non-functioning parts, although some criticize this method as being both sloppy and time-consuming. It is also hard to tell when the dismantling is complete unless the body has been obliterated.
	__________________ The rain has a such a lovely sound to those who're six feet underground The leaves will bury every year and no one knows I'm gone -Tom Waits May You Never Thirst, Slàinte!

17th February 2006, 09:22 AM	#6
Manny Illuminator Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,295	Originally Posted by Mephisto Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove? Gitmo. Definitely Gitmo.
Manny Illuminator Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,295	__________________ "I propose that if someone wants to quote another poster in their sig line, they must get the permission of the person they are quoting." - ImaginalDisc "post anything you don't want to see in someone's sig." - Marquis de Carabas

17th February 2006, 09:36 AM	#7
Mark Former Spinal Tap Drummer Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 5,529	Originally Posted by fishbob The undead are not vulnerable to shotguns.
	__________________ "Give me immortality or give me death!"---The Firesign Theatre

17th February 2006, 09:37 AM	#8
Belz... Fiend God Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: In the details... Posts: 28,522	Originally Posted by Ziggurat Depends on the undead. Zombies are (haven't you seen Dawn of the Dead?), though you have to blow their brains out. Vampires are not (or at least, not to lead or steel shot, though maybe to silver). I'm not sure about mummies, ghasts, wights, etc. What kind of undead would Cheney be? I think you can't really determine his vulnerability until you determine that. Really. If you've seen RETURN of the living dead, you'd know by now that true zombies CANNOT be killed. Not even by nukes.
	__________________ The Onmyouza Theatre, An unofficial international fanclub forum dedicated to the Japanese heavy metal band Onmyo-Za: "In the interests of time and space, it is not unreasonable to cite one point at a time. Citing 30 is the equivalent of citing none. Obviously." - Robert Prey "Physical evidence must be observed and interpreted by witnesses which makes it subjective and subject to mistakes and to fraud." - Robert Prey

17th February 2006, 09:38 AM	#9
Mark Former Spinal Tap Drummer Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 5,529	Originally Posted by Belz... Really. If you've seen RETURN of the living dead, you'd know by now that true zombies CANNOT be killed. Not even by nukes. Worse...nukes only spread the spores!
	__________________ "Give me immortality or give me death!"---The Firesign Theatre

17th February 2006, 09:46 AM	#10
Ziggurat Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 26,200	We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc.
	__________________ "As long as it is admitted that the law may be diverted from its true purpose -- that it may violate property instead of protecting it -- then everyone will want to participate in making the law, either to protect himself against plunder or to use it for plunder. Political questions will always be prejudicial, dominant, and all-absorbing. There will be fighting at the door of the Legislative Palace, and the struggle within will be no less furious." - Bastiat, The Law

17th February 2006, 09:48 AM	#11
Belz... Fiend God Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: In the details... Posts: 28,522	Originally Posted by Ziggurat We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. "SEND MORE PARAMEDICS!"
	__________________ The Onmyouza Theatre, An unofficial international fanclub forum dedicated to the Japanese heavy metal band Onmyo-Za: "In the interests of time and space, it is not unreasonable to cite one point at a time. Citing 30 is the equivalent of citing none. Obviously." - Robert Prey "Physical evidence must be observed and interpreted by witnesses which makes it subjective and subject to mistakes and to fraud." - Robert Prey

17th February 2006, 09:54 AM	#12
Mark Former Spinal Tap Drummer Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 5,529	Originally Posted by Ziggurat We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc. OK, but the first time I hear him mutter "brains," I am calling Clu Gallagher.
	__________________ "Give me immortality or give me death!"---The Firesign Theatre

17th February 2006, 10:19 AM	#13
JPK Graduate Poster Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 1,175	Originally Posted by Ziggurat We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc. Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire. JPK
JPK Graduate Poster Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 1,175	__________________ "I think it's better to have ideas. You can change an idea. Changing a belief is trickier... A belief's a dangerous thing. People die for it. People kill for it." Rufus, the 13th apostle, Dogma "You can't prove air." Sylvia Browne www.StopSylvia.com John Kardel

17th February 2006, 10:21 AM	#14
Jorghnassen Illuminator Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: The realm of ideas Posts: 3,881	No, Cheney's no undead (and certainly not a zombie). Cyborg is closer to it. Or maybe some sort of golem...
	__________________ "Help control the local pet population: teach your dog abstinence." -Stephen Colbert "My dad believed laughter is the best medicine. Which is why several of us died of tuberculosis."- Unknown source, heard from Grey Delisle on Rob Paulsen's podcast

17th February 2006, 11:36 AM	#16
TragicMonkey Poisoned Waffles Pither Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Monkey Posts: 30,092	I just saw a headline on Yahoo News: "Man shot by Cheney leaving hospital". I was struck by a mental image of Cheney, emerging from a hospital's main entrance, grabbing a gun and blasting some random guy standing there. Perhaps the incident of the hunting accident was just a symptom of a greater problem? Maybe Cheney's got an addictive compulsion to shooting people? Maybe from now on, when we see him at podiums, we'll see his fists clench as he tries to fight the urge to shoot people. "Must....restrain....killing....spree!"
	__________________ One cannot expect wisdom to flow from a pumpkin.

17th February 2006, 11:36 AM	#17
Ziggurat Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 26,200	Originally Posted by Jorghnassen No, Cheney's no undead (and certainly not a zombie). Cyborg is closer to it. Or maybe some sort of golem... Maybe an invisible Israeli lesbian robot? "According to a recent poll, nearly 90% of the Arab world believes that some years ago, Egyptian president Hosni Mubarek, Saddam Hussein, and the sultan of Brunei were kidnapped by the CIA and replaced wih Israeli look-alikes. And that later, these look-alikes were killed and replaced by Israeli robots, one of which is a lesbian robot. Aso, one of the robots is invisible. Let me just say that this is at best a gross oversimplification of the truth." - Will Ferrell as President Bush, SNL
	__________________ "As long as it is admitted that the law may be diverted from its true purpose -- that it may violate property instead of protecting it -- then everyone will want to participate in making the law, either to protect himself against plunder or to use it for plunder. Political questions will always be prejudicial, dominant, and all-absorbing. There will be fighting at the door of the Legislative Palace, and the struggle within will be no less furious." - Bastiat, The Law

17th February 2006, 11:39 AM	#18
Ziggurat Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 26,200	Originally Posted by TragicMonkey I just saw a headline on Yahoo News: "Man shot by Cheney leaving hospital". I was struck by a mental image of Cheney, emerging from a hospital's main entrance, grabbing a gun and blasting some random guy standing there. Hmmm... the picture I got was of Cheney waiting in ambush outside the hospital, so that some poor shmuck who's just been discharged gets gunned down as he walks out the door.
	__________________ "As long as it is admitted that the law may be diverted from its true purpose -- that it may violate property instead of protecting it -- then everyone will want to participate in making the law, either to protect himself against plunder or to use it for plunder. Political questions will always be prejudicial, dominant, and all-absorbing. There will be fighting at the door of the Legislative Palace, and the struggle within will be no less furious." - Bastiat, The Law

17th February 2006, 11:41 AM	#19
TragicMonkey Poisoned Waffles Pither Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Monkey Posts: 30,092	Originally Posted by Ziggurat Hmmm... the picture I got was of Cheney waiting in ambush outside the hospital, so that some poor shmuck who's just been discharged gets gunned down as he walks out the door. Well, maybe he wants to finish the job on what's-his-face.
	__________________ One cannot expect wisdom to flow from a pumpkin.

17th February 2006, 11:47 AM	#20
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	Originally Posted by JPK Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire. JPK Have you personally seen him in the daylight? I think not.
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	__________________ "The history of science is the record of dead religions" Phrases And Philosophies For The Use Of The Young Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) Our Guarentee: One obscure (or not) Python reference per day.

17th February 2006, 01:32 PM	#21
Mephisto Philosopher Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: in a state of disbelief Posts: 6,065	Ahhhh! Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day!
	__________________ "What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?" Mahatma Gandhi

17th February 2006, 01:40 PM	#22
Ziggurat Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 26,200	Originally Posted by Mephisto Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day! Don't thank us, thank Cheney
	__________________ "As long as it is admitted that the law may be diverted from its true purpose -- that it may violate property instead of protecting it -- then everyone will want to participate in making the law, either to protect himself against plunder or to use it for plunder. Political questions will always be prejudicial, dominant, and all-absorbing. There will be fighting at the door of the Legislative Palace, and the struggle within will be no less furious." - Bastiat, The Law

17th February 2006, 01:45 PM	#23
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	Originally Posted by Mephisto Nothing like the togetherness brought about by our VP shooting another man! Thanks guys, you've ALL made my day! If the SOB didn't have a WMD it wouldn't have been OK. SEE?
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	__________________ "The history of science is the record of dead religions" Phrases And Philosophies For The Use Of The Young Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) Our Guarentee: One obscure (or not) Python reference per day.

17th February 2006, 01:45 PM	#24
zakur Illuminator Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Dayton, OH Posts: 3,265	Originally Posted by Ziggurat Don't thank us, thank Cheney And be sure to wear orange.
	__________________ "I do not believe in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance." -Thomas Carlyle "That's the problem these days: nobody thinks of the tumors." -steinhenge

17th February 2006, 01:46 PM	#25
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	Originally Posted by Ziggurat Don't thank us, thank Cheney It is sorta scarey that he is only funny when he shoots someone.
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	__________________ "The history of science is the record of dead religions" Phrases And Philosophies For The Use Of The Young Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) Our Guarentee: One obscure (or not) Python reference per day.

17th February 2006, 01:47 PM	#27
Manny Illuminator Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,295	Geez, did you guys see he was shooting a Perazzi? I swear, give a guy thirty million bucks or so and make him Vice President and all of a sudden he thinks he's special, what with the fancy guns and all.
Manny Illuminator Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,295

17th February 2006, 01:53 PM	#28
Skeptic Banned Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind the chessboard Posts: 18,361	Originally Posted by Ziggurat We shouldn't let this discussion center too much around zombies, because I'm pretty sure Cheney isn't a zombie. He's a little stiff, but he doesn't have much in the way of speech impediments, and I've never seen a zombie who could clearly enunciate a profanity. My bet is vampire, though I haven't quite figured out how he gets around the whole daylight turning him into dust problem. But there are probably ways, what with modern technology, sunscreen, etc. That might explain where the "undisclosed location" is. Transilvenia, I presume?

17th February 2006, 02:11 PM	#29
FreeChile Graduate Poster Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Virginia Posts: 1,039	Originally Posted by Mephisto I've been involved in a few discussions about the inadequacies of the VP's idea of hunter's safety and someone brought up the question (which I'm sure several people here have already considered), "What would have happened had Whittington been the one to shoot Cheney?" Most people agreed that he would have been dead in the field for an apparent assassination attempt, but even if the SS hadn't "neutralized the threat" would the incident have gone over 18 hours without being reported? Would Faux News still have downplayed the seriousness of the incident? Would we be subject to 24 hour news coverage on the condition of the VP, complete with diagrams, CSI-type animations showing the bullet's (or pellets) pathway through his tons of body fat, surgeon's comments, X-Rays, MRIs, ballistic expert's testimony and an hourly Toxicologist's report regarding the danger of lead in the bloodstream? Just wondering aloud what the implications would have been had the foot been in the other glove? Well, if he had actually died and the bullet had actually rickocheted and hit Bush, and he had died, we would've ended up with the speaker of the house for President.

17th February 2006, 03:02 PM	#30
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	Originally Posted by FreeChile Well, if he had actually died and the bullet had actually rickocheted and hit Bush, and he had died, we would've ended up with the speaker of the house for President. Unless Chaney and Bush are both zombies. www.zombo.com
Ed god Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 8,691	__________________ "The history of science is the record of dead religions" Phrases And Philosophies For The Use Of The Young Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) Our Guarentee: One obscure (or not) Python reference per day.

17th February 2006, 10:11 PM	#31
President Bush Banned Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Islets of Langerhans Posts: 1,506	Originally Posted by JPK Whereas I have seen Cheney out in the daylight, I can not recall him ever crossing running water in the sunlight. Depending on the Vampire lore you choose to follow, this could stll make him a vampire. Quote: ... he speaks for the werewolf in us... a foul caricature of himself, a man with no soul, no inner convictions, with the integrity of a hyena and the style of a poison toad. I couldn’t imagine him laughing at anything except maybe a paraplegic who wanted to vote Democratic but couldn’t quite reach the lever on the voting machine.

18th February 2006, 06:34 AM	#32
Mephisto Philosopher Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: in a state of disbelief Posts: 6,065	Originally Posted by President Bush Are those Hunter's words regarding Cheney? They could just as easily have fit Nixon and I'd certainly like to believe that Dr. Thompson had some pretty funny opinions about Cheney, but when you consider criminal, Republican politicians, these words seem interchangable.
	__________________ "What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?" Mahatma Gandhi

18th February 2006, 06:38 AM	#33
Mephisto Philosopher Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: in a state of disbelief Posts: 6,065	Originally Posted by TragicMonkey I just had a brilliant idea: Grand Theft Auto: Vice Presidency More guns. More violence. More ho's. OR - you could get Grand Theft Auto - The Presidential Version where the culprit is no longer satisfied with local carjackings and instead turns to hijacking an entire country to take it on a shooting spree in another country, complete with BIGGER guns, violence on a grand scale and the Ho's wear gunney sacks.
	__________________ "What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?" Mahatma Gandhi

18th February 2006, 09:18 AM	#34
RandFan Mormon Atheist Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Southern California Posts: 53,286	Originally Posted by you-too Guns don't kill people... No, some dick with a shotgun does.
	__________________ Ego, ain't it a bitch? It is not very unreasonable that the rich should contribute to the public expense, not only in proportion to their revenue, but something more than in that proportion. --Adam Smith

18th February 2006, 09:53 AM	#35
TragicMonkey Poisoned Waffles Pither Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Monkey Posts: 30,092	Originally Posted by Mephisto OR - you could get Grand Theft Auto - The Presidential Version where the culprit is no longer satisfied with local carjackings and instead turns to hijacking an entire country to take it on a shooting spree in another country, complete with BIGGER guns, violence on a grand scale and the Ho's wear gunney sacks. They already have that game. It's called "Mary Kate And Ashley's Slumber Party Jihad". Rated M for all the swearing those girls do.
	__________________ One cannot expect wisdom to flow from a pumpkin.

18th February 2006, 10:28 AM	#36
delphi_ote Debunking Ninja Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 6,006	Originally Posted by TragicMonkey They already have that game. It's called "Mary Kate And Ashley's Slumber Party Jihad". Rated M for all the swearing those girls do. And the lesbian shower scene... oh no. I've said too much!
	__________________ And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

18th February 2006, 12:30 PM	#37
RandFan Mormon Atheist Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Southern California Posts: 53,286	Originally Posted by delphi_ote And the lesbian shower scene... oh no. I've said too much! Man I've got to stay away from the politics forum. It's not a healthy place for such a decent and morally upstanding pervert as me.
	__________________ Ego, ain't it a bitch? It is not very unreasonable that the rich should contribute to the public expense, not only in proportion to their revenue, but something more than in that proportion. --Adam Smith