And All Answers Were Revealed - For a Price

westphalia · 4th May 2006, 08:40 PM

This one now ranks as one of my favorite eBay auctions ever.

http://cgi.ebay.com/A-LECTURE-JESUS-...QQcmdZViewItem

It's true!

westphalia · 4th May 2006, 08:41 PM

My particular favorite line is "cancer occurs when we eat our own flesh." I should check and see how Alfred Packer died.

milesalpha · 5th May 2006, 04:12 AM

How do folks, my first post on JREF and it's a pleasure to be here. This is a hilarious post. My field is history and I am borderline hopeless at science so I was curious about her assertion that saliva would not contain replicating DNA cells. It doesn't sound right to me, but the Caramilk secret baffled me for years. Anyone fill me in?

Zep · 5th May 2006, 05:19 AM

Gee I hope he gets some bids! After all, he just gave his full lecture as the description page for his sale! It's like the opening paragraph of a murder-mystery and we all get told whodunnit.

This guy has MUCH to learn in the bilk-'em-and-bill-'em game...

IsaacKoi · 5th May 2006, 05:50 AM

Originally Posted by westphalia

My particular favorite line is "cancer occurs when we eat our own flesh."

When I read the line you quoted, I thought that _perhaps_ this chap was suggesting that cannibalism can cause the transmission of cancer (in the same way that cannibalism can transmit prion diseases, such as kuru) or that cancer was due to eating animal flesh (using "our own flesh" in a rather wide sense).

Unfortunately, I was giving him too much credit.

He states: "Two very simple examples of eating our own flesh are biting our cuticles or biting our lips."

Okay....

(By the way, I'm not sure why the shipping option for his lecture is "Pickup Only"!)

Zep · 5th May 2006, 05:55 AM

He needs to be "picked up"?? [insert image of big butterfly net]

Silly Green Monkey · 5th May 2006, 01:17 PM

Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years...

Forty-Two · 5th May 2006, 02:36 PM

Welcome, milesalpha!

I love reading things like this where the author has lost touch with reality but truely believes what he's saying. Some highlights:

Quote:

Jesus Christ is our Earth's sun.

So, while he was alive and walking on the earth, was the sun conspicuously absent from the sky, or was he in two places at once?

Quote:

There is an interesting correlation to Christianity here. Jesus told us to "take His flesh and eat it." Now he wants us to know not to eat our own flesh in any way because it is deadly.

Wow, there's no way to argue with that "correlation." Telling people to eat flesh is exactly the same as telling people not to; it all makes sense now!

Quote:

An AMERICAN president has to set a goal for WORLD PEACE BEFORE 2021. (President Kennedy did something similar when he set a goal for the USA to land a man on the moon in the 60's.)

Because, as we all know, Kennedy setting the goal was all it took to get us to the moon. Not technological advances, not research, not experimentation, not critical thinking, but good goal-setting.

This is awesome, and I haven't even read the questions section yet!

Forty-Two · 5th May 2006, 02:51 PM

Originally Posted by Silly Green Monkey

Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years...

I think Timothy has more to worry about.

westphalia · 5th May 2006, 07:50 PM

Originally Posted by Silly Green Monkey

Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years...

Yep, me too. Regrettably, I treat the insides of my cheeks like yummy donut holes.

Gr8wight · 6th May 2006, 05:17 AM

Quote:

By the way, I am a practicing licensed registered nurse and I can provide excellent references.

Mayday?

4th May 2006, 08:40 PM	#1
westphalia Critical Thinker Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I am a third-rate intellect. Posts: 297	And All Answers Were Revealed - For a Price This one now ranks as one of my favorite eBay auctions ever. http://cgi.ebay.com/A-LECTURE-JESUS-...QQcmdZViewItem It's true!
	__________________ "If it moves, the liberal wants to tax it. If it keeps moving, the liberal wants to regulate it. And if it ever up and stops moving, the liberal wants to subsidize it." - Ronald Reagan

4th May 2006, 08:41 PM	#2
westphalia Critical Thinker Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I am a third-rate intellect. Posts: 297	My particular favorite line is "cancer occurs when we eat our own flesh." I should check and see how Alfred Packer died.
	__________________ "If it moves, the liberal wants to tax it. If it keeps moving, the liberal wants to regulate it. And if it ever up and stops moving, the liberal wants to subsidize it." - Ronald Reagan

5th May 2006, 05:19 AM	#4
Zep Banned Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 26,985	Gee I hope he gets some bids! After all, he just gave his full lecture as the description page for his sale! It's like the opening paragraph of a murder-mystery and we all get told whodunnit. This guy has MUCH to learn in the bilk-'em-and-bill-'em game...
Zep Banned Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 26,985

5th May 2006, 05:50 AM	#5
IsaacKoi British Barrister Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 52	Originally Posted by westphalia My particular favorite line is "cancer occurs when we eat our own flesh." When I read the line you quoted, I thought that _perhaps_ this chap was suggesting that cannibalism can cause the transmission of cancer (in the same way that cannibalism can transmit prion diseases, such as kuru) or that cancer was due to eating animal flesh (using "our own flesh" in a rather wide sense). Unfortunately, I was giving him too much credit. He states: "Two very simple examples of eating our own flesh are biting our cuticles or biting our lips." Okay.... (By the way, I'm not sure why the shipping option for his lecture is "Pickup Only"!)
IsaacKoi British Barrister Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 52

5th May 2006, 05:55 AM	#6
Zep Banned Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 26,985	He needs to be "picked up"?? [insert image of big butterfly net]
Zep Banned Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 26,985

5th May 2006, 04:12 AM	#3
milesalpha Critical Thinker Join Date: May 2006 Location: Parts Unknown aka Nova Scotia Posts: 375	How do folks, my first post on JREF and it's a pleasure to be here. This is a hilarious post. My field is history and I am borderline hopeless at science so I was curious about her assertion that saliva would not contain replicating DNA cells. It doesn't sound right to me, but the Caramilk secret baffled me for years. Anyone fill me in?

5th May 2006, 01:17 PM	#7
Silly Green Monkey Cowardly Lurking in the Shadows of Greatness Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Colorado Posts: 3,048	Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years...

5th May 2006, 02:36 PM	#8
Forty-Two The Answer Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Carpinteria, CA Posts: 912	Welcome, milesalpha! I love reading things like this where the author has lost touch with reality but truely believes what he's saying. Some highlights: Quote: Jesus Christ is our Earth's sun. So, while he was alive and walking on the earth, was the sun conspicuously absent from the sky, or was he in two places at once? Quote: There is an interesting correlation to Christianity here. Jesus told us to "take His flesh and eat it." Now he wants us to know not to eat our own flesh in any way because it is deadly. Wow, there's no way to argue with that "correlation." Telling people to eat flesh is exactly the same as telling people not to; it all makes sense now! Quote: An AMERICAN president has to set a goal for WORLD PEACE BEFORE 2021. (President Kennedy did something similar when he set a goal for the USA to land a man on the moon in the 60's.) Because, as we all know, Kennedy setting the goal was all it took to get us to the moon. Not technological advances, not research, not experimentation, not critical thinking, but good goal-setting. This is awesome, and I haven't even read the questions section yet!

5th May 2006, 02:51 PM	#9
Forty-Two The Answer Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Carpinteria, CA Posts: 912	Originally Posted by Silly Green Monkey Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years... I think Timothy has more to worry about.

5th May 2006, 07:50 PM	#10
westphalia Critical Thinker Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: I am a third-rate intellect. Posts: 297	Originally Posted by Silly Green Monkey Oh dear...I've been nibbling on my lips for years... Yep, me too. Regrettably, I treat the insides of my cheeks like yummy donut holes.
	__________________ "If it moves, the liberal wants to tax it. If it keeps moving, the liberal wants to regulate it. And if it ever up and stops moving, the liberal wants to subsidize it." - Ronald Reagan

6th May 2006, 05:17 AM	#11
Gr8wight red-shirted crewman Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 1,641	Quote: By the way, I am a practicing licensed registered nurse and I can provide excellent references. Mayday?
	__________________ Aurora Walking Vacation "A point of view can be a dangerous luxury when substituted for insight and understanding."--Marshall McLuhan