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#1 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,383
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Ritual sex to change one's luck. Heh.
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/11/02/taoist_master/
The short and skinny is that a model was told that having "ritual sex" with a Taoist Master would improve her luck. Which she did. Repeatedly. She apparently even insisted on paying him for it. Turns out it was just a truck driver. Only change so far seems to be that she got pregnant. As an aside... I don't know... it's stuff like this that makes me wonder just how superstitious, gullible and/or delusional some people can be. I mean, the whole "you need to blow me to get good luck" setup reads like a joke, except the joke used to involve a leprechaun instead of a Taoist Master... |
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#2 |
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Illuminator
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 3,369
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Someone has to say it: He sure gut luckier!
From the article:
Quote:
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#3 |
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Orthogonal Vector
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Ossining NY
Posts: 17,597
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Why do people think being a truck driver and guru or sage are so incompatable?
I think it will be difficult to show that his psychic luck sex is just as effective as other guru's psychic luck rituals. |
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__________________
Sufficiently advanced Woo is indistinguishable from Parody "There shall be no *poofing* in science" Paul C. Anagnostopoulos Force ***** on reasons back" Ben Franklin |
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#4 |
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Critical Thinker
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Here,now
Posts: 396
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#5 |
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Graduate Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,020
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Well; it does sounds kinda funny on face value.
On the other hand, the guy DID take advantage of her, and the trust and position of authority he exercised on her which is quite serious. |
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#6 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#7 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,383
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Well, I'd think that failing to check the guy's credentials _is_ further proof of gullibility, if any more proof is needed. But the surrealistic element for me is that someone would just go on with a ritual that, basically, starts with "now you must blow me." I mean, we're not talking about wearing an amulet or saying a hundred Hail Marys. At the very least you'd think someone would... wonder if the Guru's interest in that ritual is purely charitable and does not contain a bit of self-interest. And not the enlightened kind
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#8 |
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Muse
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 629
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__________________
Looking for a man to put on a pedestal. E-mail: Medusa@Hades.gr |
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#9 |
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Orthogonal Vector
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Ossining NY
Posts: 17,597
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__________________
Sufficiently advanced Woo is indistinguishable from Parody "There shall be no *poofing* in science" Paul C. Anagnostopoulos Force ***** on reasons back" Ben Franklin |
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#10 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,383
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#11 |
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ducky's chatroom assassin
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Freedonia
Posts: 350
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It is amusing to realize how many of these ritual sex programs are invented by men.
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__________________
"Si, je suis Marxiste - tendance Groucho." [09:56] <Hawk_one> In my much more awesome opinion, I should be ruling the world! "But don't whine if you find that you can't afford the multithousand dollar software package or the multimillion dollar equipment, and if you find that CERN won't loan you the LHC for a weekend." ~ drkitten |
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#12 |
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Muse
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 749
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What credentials, one wonders, must you have to be a Taoist master? Couldn't a toilet attendant be a master?
But if you can get blowjobs and get paid for them - where do I sign up? I could stay an atheist couldn't I? I mean they don't have Gods? |
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#13 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#14 |
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Muse
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 749
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Whoah there. You making fun of my new religion? And why would I want boys? Im not a Catholic.
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#15 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,383
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Taoism has a metric buttload (about 1.1 imperial arseloads
) of Gods, I'm affraid. If you want the no gods version you must go Buddhist master.Though I suppose one could also get a variant of pantheism that's just an obfuscated way of saying "there is no God." Spinoza's God is an excellent example of that. Hmm... Spinozan Guru sounds kinda cool, actually
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#16 |
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Illuminator
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 3,369
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#17 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#18 |
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Muse
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 729
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I thought this was the funniest thing I had seen all day, until I got to the bottom and saw the related headline:
Quote:
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__________________
"A certain percentage of children have the habit of thinking; one of the aims of education is to cure them of this habit." -- Bertrand Russell on problems with traditional educational methods. |
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#19 |
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Muse
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Columbia, SC
Posts: 883
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Now THAT'll change your luck!
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#20 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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from that headline theres this
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/09...n_witchdoctor/
Quote:
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#21 |
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Howling to glory I go
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,949
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Best part of that article is the related stories section:
Related Stories Error: a thorough search of the Register database for "sex" and "hedgehog" returned [0] results. Please modify your search to contain at least one IT-related term. |
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#22 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#23 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 2,383
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I think he means the Related Stories at the bottom of the hedgehog article.
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#24 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#25 |
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Orthogonal Vector
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Ossining NY
Posts: 17,597
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__________________
Sufficiently advanced Woo is indistinguishable from Parody "There shall be no *poofing* in science" Paul C. Anagnostopoulos Force ***** on reasons back" Ben Franklin |
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#26 |
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Graduate Poster
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Trevose, PA
Posts: 1,357
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#27 |
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Sum, ergo cogito
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Behind the chessboard
Posts: 12,168
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Quote:
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__________________
CNN, Fox, MSNBC are all terrible, all do the exact same thing: take news wire reports, add a bunch of unnecessary opinion, and then re-brand it as "infotainment" as if this were some sort of useful service. It is akin to paying me to read a newspaper to you, while interrupting frequently with my own opinion. -- Zaphod2016 |
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#28 |
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Graduate Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,020
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That reminds me of the news a few week ago about this teacher at a Christian school that convinced a couple of teenager to have sex with him for some cultish reason...
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#29 |
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Muse
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 747
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Well, as a general rule, people who have sex are luckier than people who don't, in that they're getting laid. So, there you are!
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#30 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#31 |
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Scholar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Chicago 'burbs
Posts: 107
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Awesome. Kinda reminds me of this bar downtown - you go in, pay em five bucks, and they give you a drink and a sandwich, then take you in the back room and get you laid.
I've never been there, but my sister has. |
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#32 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#33 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Muskego, WI.
Posts: 2,959
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Her first mistake was to go to a Taoist for her sexual rituals when the Wiccans have the real deal... or was it the Raelians....
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__________________
No Gods! No Masters! Mark A. SIefert |
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#34 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 2,512
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But what am I to do if I have no luck getting sex?
Damn ketch 22. |
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__________________
Circled nothing is still nothing. "Nothing will stop the U.S. from being a world leader, not even a handful of adults who want their kids to take science lessons from a book that mentions unicorns six times." -UNLoVedRebel Look at the puppy...the puppy is good. |
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#35 |
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The Accidental Podcaster
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: On the other side of your screen.
Posts: 25,287
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__________________
The Nonsense Podcast Features the LHC and multi-dimensional portals, The wonder herb Tribulus, the Catholic church and homosexuals, John Edward visits, some information on Wilhelm Reich and Orgone, we get to know Dave the Happy Singer plus more! What's an "arthwollipot"? |
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#36 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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its the Babylonian pantheists actually, you must have missed my international churchboard campaign.
![]() we had to change the wording as the original message wasn't appreciated down south as some people thought it was offensive http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a1...churchsign.jpg
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#37 |
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Dragon Killer
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Newbury, Berkshire
Posts: 2,007
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__________________
Senno Ecto Gama ĝae haš dug zae ama kibid "Stupid humans" (Wollery) "Kill all humans" (Bender) "for while heaven may be closed I am always open, even on Christmas." (Lucifer) |
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#38 |
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Muse
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 749
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#39 |
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Master Poster
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 2,512
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__________________
Circled nothing is still nothing. "Nothing will stop the U.S. from being a world leader, not even a handful of adults who want their kids to take science lessons from a book that mentions unicorns six times." -UNLoVedRebel Look at the puppy...the puppy is good. |
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#40 |
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Sum, ergo cogito
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Behind the chessboard
Posts: 12,168
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Sex is usually due to romance, which leads to marriage, which often leads to divorce...
Why don't you shorten the procedure, tyr_13? Instead of looking for love, just find a woman you don't like and buy her a house. |
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__________________
CNN, Fox, MSNBC are all terrible, all do the exact same thing: take news wire reports, add a bunch of unnecessary opinion, and then re-brand it as "infotainment" as if this were some sort of useful service. It is akin to paying me to read a newspaper to you, while interrupting frequently with my own opinion. -- Zaphod2016 |
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