FREE TAPATALK APP

shemp · 31st August 2008, 06:36 PM

[audience] How old is he?! [/audience]

He's so old, in the last Ice Age, he argued against Global Cooling.

He's so old, he was flying the plane that shot down King Kong.

He's so old, he knows who's really buried in Grant's Tomb.

[Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon]

He's so old, he remembers when Marx and Engels were Republicans.

He's so old, he lost everything in the crash of '29... 1829!

He's so old, he remembers when Lewis and Clark weren't Jerry and Dick.

[Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon]

He's so old, he polled 73% with Neanderthals.

He's so old, the last time the Cubs won the World Series, he did the flyover in a zeppelin.

He's so old, he has an autographed copy of the Bible.

[Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon]

He's so old, Methuselah sent him birthday cards.

He's so old, he has money that reads "In Zeus We Trust".

He's so old, he knows what Mona Lisa looked like when she frowned.

Thank you very much, I'll be here all week at 8 and 11, try the veal, and don't forget to tip.

mrbaracuda · 31st August 2008, 06:42 PM

Mercutio · 31st August 2008, 09:05 PM

He's older than....

Duct tape.

Chocolate chip cookies

Fiberglass

Shemp

72 things younger than John McCain

gtc · 31st August 2008, 09:14 PM

I am surprised about chocolate chip cookies.

President Bush · 31st August 2008, 09:24 PM

John McCain is so old I told him to act his age and he died.

shemp · 31st August 2008, 09:29 PM

He's so old, he remembers when "Cool Whip" was the Marquis de Sade's nickname.

[Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon]

SezMe · 31st August 2008, 09:34 PM

He's so old he can remember sitting on the shores of Pangaea during vacations from his 10¹² homes further inland.

TheJim · 31st August 2008, 10:33 PM

McCain is so old when he hears a loud noise he remembers the big bang

McCain is so old when he hears the trojans are playing he thinks of Achilles

McCain is so old he left dumped his first wife for Eve

SezMe · 31st August 2008, 10:48 PM

C'mon, TheJim, your last comment is cruel. He right dumped his first wife for Eve. McCain has never "left dumped" anything. I know because Cindy told me so.

Brainster · 31st August 2008, 11:02 PM

Phil Niekro calls him "old-timer".

MattusMaximus · 31st August 2008, 11:05 PM

He's so old that when God said "Let there be light" it was McCain who threw the switch.

<For the religious types, ya know

>

31st August 2008, 06:36 PM	#1
shemp Timothy, Timothy, where on earth did you go? Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: trapped in a cave-in with Joe Posts: 12,970	John McCain is so old... [audience] How old is he?! [/audience] He's so old, in the last Ice Age, he argued against Global Cooling. He's so old, he was flying the plane that shot down King Kong. He's so old, he knows who's really buried in Grant's Tomb. [Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon] He's so old, he remembers when Marx and Engels were Republicans. He's so old, he lost everything in the crash of '29... 1829! He's so old, he remembers when Lewis and Clark weren't Jerry and Dick. [Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon] He's so old, he polled 73% with Neanderthals. He's so old, the last time the Cubs won the World Series, he did the flyover in a zeppelin. He's so old, he has an autographed copy of the Bible. [Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon] He's so old, Methuselah sent him birthday cards. He's so old, he has money that reads "In Zeus We Trust". He's so old, he knows what Mona Lisa looked like when she frowned. Thank you very much, I'll be here all week at 8 and 11, try the veal, and don't forget to tip.
	__________________ Church on Sunday, sleep and nod Tryin' to duck the wrath of God Preacher's fillin' us with fright Tryin' to tell us what he thinks is right He really got to be some kind of nut (I can't use it!) Tryin' to make it real - compared to what?

31st August 2008, 09:05 PM	#3
Mercutio Shakespeare's Sock Puppet Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Live Free Or Die Posts: 16,325	He's older than.... Duct tape. Chocolate chip cookies Fiberglass Shemp 72 things younger than John McCain
	__________________ "But to see her was to love her Love but her, and love forever."

31st August 2008, 09:29 PM	#6
shemp Timothy, Timothy, where on earth did you go? Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: trapped in a cave-in with Joe Posts: 12,970	He's so old, he remembers when "Cool Whip" was the Marquis de Sade's nickname. [Ed McMahon] Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!!! [/Ed McMahon]
	__________________ Church on Sunday, sleep and nod Tryin' to duck the wrath of God Preacher's fillin' us with fright Tryin' to tell us what he thinks is right He really got to be some kind of nut (I can't use it!) Tryin' to make it real - compared to what?

31st August 2008, 10:33 PM	#8
TheJim Critical Thinker Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 419	McCain is so old when he hears a loud noise he remembers the big bang McCain is so old when he hears the trojans are playing he thinks of Achilles McCain is so old he left dumped his first wife for Eve
TheJim Critical Thinker Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 419

31st August 2008, 11:02 PM	#10
Brainster Penultimate Amazing Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 10,541	Phil Niekro calls him "old-timer".
	__________________ My new blog: Recent Reads. 1960s Comic Book Nostalgia Visit the Screw Loose Change blog.

31st August 2008, 06:42 PM	#2
mrbaracuda Banned Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Germany Posts: 3,799

31st August 2008, 09:14 PM	#4
gtc Philosopher Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: the downunderverse Posts: 7,114	I am surprised about chocolate chip cookies.

31st August 2008, 09:24 PM	#5
President Bush Banned Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Islets of Langerhans Posts: 1,506	John McCain is so old I told him to act his age and he died.

31st August 2008, 09:34 PM	#7
SezMe post-pre-born Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Santa Barbara, CA Posts: 16,647	He's so old he can remember sitting on the shores of Pangaea during vacations from his 10¹² homes further inland.

31st August 2008, 10:48 PM	#9
SezMe post-pre-born Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Santa Barbara, CA Posts: 16,647	C'mon, TheJim, your last comment is cruel. He right dumped his first wife for Eve. McCain has never "left dumped" anything. I know because Cindy told me so.

31st August 2008, 11:05 PM	#11
MattusMaximus Intellectual Gladiator Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: In the midst of a vast, beautiful & uncaring universe Posts: 14,204	He's so old that when God said "Let there be light" it was McCain who threw the switch. <For the religious types, ya know >
	__________________ Visit my blog: The Skeptical Teacher The Times They Are A-Changin'