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Old 10th October 2010, 07:07 PM   #1
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Homosexuality is a choice

why do some folks still think that being gay or lesbian is a choice?

most science shows that gays and lesbians realize they are this way early on in life, sometimes even before puberty.

and yet, lots of folks like to talk about it...as if its a choice.

a choice, that can be changed. ahhhh!!!!!!!!!!

now I get it.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:14 PM   #2
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Who cares? What difference does it make one way or the other?
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:17 PM   #3
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Originally Posted by Cleon View Post
Who cares? What difference does it make one way or the other?
Exactly
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:18 PM   #4
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You have two choices:

1. Accept it.

2. Deny it and live a lie.

There are many married men with families who are quite gay and closeted, if my experience is any indication.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:19 PM   #5
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i sure as hell never choose to be queer.
it was the way i was born.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:22 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by bikerdruid View Post
i sure as hell never choose to be queer.
it was the way i was born.
can you tell us..at what age you realized that you liked boys and not girls?
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:29 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Thunder View Post
can you tell us..at what age you realized that you liked boys and not girls?
as long as i can remember.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:33 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by bikerdruid View Post
as long as i can remember.
fascinating.

though, I'm sure this is not the same for all gays.

Kinsey's scale of homosexuality suggests to me that those who are less "strongly" gay, probably realized their sexuality later in life.

or maybe I am wrong. who the hell knows. I prefer to just believe that all gays and lesbians are born that way.

though I do have my doubts about many lesbians, who seem to have "chosen" their sexuality after numerous bad experiences with men, or growing up with a crappy dad. you never hear about men going gay, after being dissed by one too many girlfriends.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:36 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by Thunder View Post
though I do have my doubts about many lesbians, who seem to have chosen their lifestyle after numerous bad experiences with men, or growing up with a crappy dad.
Do you think maybe being lesbian may have influenced their relationship problems with men? Growing up in a society that looks down upon homosexuals forces some people to go along to get along.
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Old 10th October 2010, 07:46 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Skeeve View Post
Do you think maybe being lesbian may have influenced their relationship problems with men?
interesting theory. i should ask some of my lesbian friends about this.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:06 PM   #11
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Homosexuality is no more than a depraved degeneracy.
It is the most horrible thing in the world to be.
That's why no queer chooses to be that way.
They cannot help themselves.
Pity the fairies and their poor lot in life.
They did not ask to be born a perverted mockery of nature.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:13 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by bynmdsue View Post
Homosexuality is no more than a depraved degeneracy.
It is the most horrible thing in the world to be.
That's why no queer chooses to be that way.
They cannot help themselves.
Pity the fairies and their poor lot in life.
They did not ask to be born a perverted mockery of nature.
Interesting.

Tell me more.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:14 PM   #13
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Originally Posted by bynmdsue View Post
Homosexuality is no more than a depraved degeneracy.
It is the most horrible thing in the world to be.
That's why no queer chooses to be that way.
They cannot help themselves.
Pity the fairies and their poor lot in life.
They did not ask to be born a perverted mockery of nature.
indeed. i think if homosexuality was a choice, there would be ZERO homosexuals on Earth.

could you imagine actually CHOSING to be gay, in the Muslim world?

in Eastern Europe?

talk about suicidal.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:15 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by bynmdsue View Post
Homosexuality is no more than a depraved degeneracy.
It is the most horrible thing in the world to be.
That's why no queer chooses to be that way.
They cannot help themselves.
Pity the fairies and their poor lot in life.
They did not ask to be born a perverted mockery of nature.
quite the enlightened view.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:20 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by Thunder View Post
indeed. i think if homosexuality was a choice, there would be ZERO homosexuals on Earth. could you imagine actually CHOSING to be gay, in the Muslim world? in Eastern Europe? talk about suicidal.
An yet, oddly enough, there are people who actually choose suicide, even when there are other viable options.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:21 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by Thunder View Post
most science shows that gays and lesbians realize they are this way early on in life, sometimes even before puberty.
The fallacy in this is that you are assuming the bigots are persuaded to engage in their bigotry by scientific evidence.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:24 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by bynmdsue View Post
Pity the fairies and their poor lot in life.
They did not ask to be born a perverted mockery of nature.
Homosexuality is seen in a wide range of natural settings in many different species. In fact, most species do not reproduce sexually at all. Hence I'd like to see some evidence that homosexuality is a "perverted mockery of nature".
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:28 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Fnord View Post
An yet, oddly enough, there are people who actually choose suicide, even when there are other viable options.
Not odd at all, really. Humans are not rational creatures. It takes very little for our emotions to dominate our actions. Every single one of us has at one point or another acted out of anger, fear, hate, love, or other emotion - whether it was the "best" viable option or not.

Despair and loneliness are powerful, powerful beasts. Combine these feelings with the raging hormones of an adolescent, and it doesn't take much to see that it can lead to some very bad, bad places.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:40 PM   #19
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My question for men who think it's a choice is this: "Are you saying that you could choose to achieve and maintain an erection and have sex to orgasm with another man?"

If the answer is "No", then you're saying homosexuality is not a choice.
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:44 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by Piggy View Post
My question for men who think it's a choice is this: "Are you saying that you could choose to achieve and maintain an erection and have sex to orgasm with another man?"

If the answer is "No", then you're saying homosexuality is not a choice.
I am so using that.

That's two quotes of yours that I've stole this week!
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Old 10th October 2010, 08:51 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by Skeeve View Post
I am so using that.
It usually stops the conversation.
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Old 10th October 2010, 11:43 PM   #22
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Has anyone who thinks homosexuality is a choice ever been asked to clarify whether heterosexuality is also a choice?
Surely, if one is the other is.
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Old 10th October 2010, 11:51 PM   #23
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yeah i remember me swimming in the womb of my mother and thinking, what shall i be, Hetero-, Bi- or Homosexual, i then decided to pick Hetero. But then i made an horrible mistake, after i have picked the color of my eyes, hair and skin, i picked hairy breast and back. oh man i was born in the seventies, back then that was pretty cool and very sexy. how could i know how times change
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Old 10th October 2010, 11:54 PM   #24
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Now that I've got a few decades under my belt, I'm starting to wonder if celibacy is a choice.
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Old 10th October 2010, 11:56 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by Thunder View Post
why do some folks still think that being gay or lesbian is a choice?

most science shows that gays and lesbians realize they are this way early on in life, sometimes even before puberty.

and yet, lots of folks like to talk about it...as if its a choice.

a choice, that can be changed. ahhhh!!!!!!!!!!

now I get it.
Do you think that sexuality is fixed and unalterable?
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:30 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post
Do you think that sexuality is fixed and unalterable?
Yes
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:34 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by kerikiwi View Post
Yes
So if it it impossible to alter, and genetic, it should be impossible to have one straight and one gay identical twin, right?
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:36 AM   #28
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post
So if it it impossible to alter, and genetic, it should be impossible to have one straight and one gay identical twin, right?
who said its genetic?
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:39 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post
So if it it impossible to alter, and genetic, it should be impossible to have one straight and one gay identical twin, right?
You've changed the question, from fixed and unalterable to fixed and genetic.
You tried a gotcha, and failed.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:40 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by DC View Post
who said its genetic?
Well there is this....

Originally Posted by openingmind View Post
* A lot of headway seems to be made as regards the biological origin of homosexuality. Even Mormon professors at BYU support a biological theory:

http://mormonstories.org/?p=1158
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:43 AM   #31
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Originally Posted by kerikiwi View Post
You've changed the question, from fixed and unalterable to fixed and genetic.
You tried a gotcha, and failed.
Well since the options generally given are nature and nurture or combination, and anything based on nurture would indicate that what can be learned can be unlearned, or changed, I made an assumption that you were going with nature, or genetics as the answer. If this is wrong, feel free to explain otherwise.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:48 AM   #32
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"Biological" does not just mean "genetic". There are things like hormonal influences before birth.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:50 AM   #33
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post
So if it it impossible to alter, and genetic, it should be impossible to have one straight and one gay identical twin, right?
There is an error in logic here. Fraternal twins are not genetically identical.

ETA: Plus what Alan said. Even identical twins don't have the identical biological environment. Also, I would not argue that it is "impossible" to change, just damn difficult.

Last edited by SezMe; 11th October 2010 at 12:52 AM.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:51 AM   #34
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post
Well since the options generally given are nature and nurture or combination, and anything based on nurture would indicate that what can be learned can be unlearned, or changed, I made an assumption that you were going with nature, or genetics as the answer. If this is wrong, feel free to explain otherwise.
Things which affect the fetus are not learned, but still affect the fetus unalterably.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:52 AM   #35
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Originally Posted by Alan View Post
"Biological" does not just mean "genetic". There are things like hormonal influences before birth.
True, however in this case we are also talking about embyros that have shared a placenta and womb and so it becomes very hard to argue that they would be exposed to a different hormonal enviroment in such a close proximity.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:54 AM   #36
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..

Last edited by kerikiwi; 11th October 2010 at 12:55 AM. Reason: Removing confusion
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:55 AM   #37
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Originally Posted by SezMe View Post
There is an error in logic here. Fraternal twins are not genetically identical.
Not talking Fraternal twins.

Quote:
ETA: Plus what Alan said. Even identical twins don't have the identical biological environment.
See there is a claim that requires a lot of proof

Quote:
Also, I would not argue that it is "impossible" to change, just damn difficult.
Interestingly it's easier for women than men, both ways.
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Old 11th October 2010, 12:57 AM   #38
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Originally Posted by PhantomWolf View Post


Interestingly it's easier for women than men, both ways.
See there is a claim that requires a lot of proof.

Do you think sexuality is a choice?
If so, what did you choose, and why?
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Old 11th October 2010, 01:14 AM   #39
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Originally Posted by Alan View Post
"Biological" does not just mean "genetic". There are things like hormonal influences before birth.
yep studies point into that direction rather than genetic.
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Old 11th October 2010, 01:15 AM   #40
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I'm not sure why some of you are looking at it as an either/or (black or white, yes or no), instead of a range with no definite points where you can say "over this line be heterosexual, over this line be homosexual, and in between are the bisexuals"....

Confusing a broad range with defined points isn't just a problem with this topic, but with many that come up (not just at the jref).

Likewise, surely there are some people (most likely a very small percentage of g/l's) that actually did make a choice (not counting bisexuals). Yet, as was already pointed out above, thinking that it is anywhere near a majority and not a tiny minority is basically absurd.
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