Moses Action Figure

MatildaGage · 4th December 2010, 05:26 PM

I saw these this morning in Rite-Aid in the toy aisle.

(Or at least I think that's the one. I didn't have much time to check it out.)

The description on Amazon normally would lead me to assume it's meant to be a spoof toy:

Quote:

Use the removable shepherd's staff and stone tablets to punish your roommate with God's plagues or deliver the Ten Commandments to your little green army men.

There was another one too, maybe Jesus or something else.

I wonder how it made its way to the shelves of Rite-Aid? Is their buyer a JREF member?

I wonder how long it will take for the persecution-complex Xians to make a stink about it.

fuelair · 4th December 2010, 05:41 PM

Cool + zombies. paparazi, raging crowd, B-movie frightened people and more (do not miss the dread Lunch Lady!!!). And, it was likely Jeebus - since they make one. No Mary Magdalene with removible costume though. I see a distinct market for Bad Girls of the Bible.

MatildaGage · 4th December 2010, 05:55 PM

Oh my....check out the Jesus action figure on amazon. His hands glow in the dark. He comes with a jug of wine....I wonder if that pisses off the Baptists.

They should make a Fred Phelps action figure.

Tiktaalik · 5th December 2010, 03:20 PM

There's a Crazy Cat Lady action figure, too...

blue sock monkey · 5th December 2010, 06:22 PM

Sadly, the talking version of the Moses action figure is sold out.

Originally Posted by Tiktaalik

There's a Crazy Cat Lady action figure, too...

I want that. I hope Santa is listening.

Juniversal · 5th December 2010, 06:54 PM

I wanna get the Jesus action figure so he can fight Optimus Prime. I wonder who'd win. Hmmm...

jnelso99 · 6th December 2010, 11:09 AM

http://www.entertainmentearth.com/hi...orical+Figures

Sigmund Freud, Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Carl Jung, Ben Franklin, etc. Ooh - Marie Antoinette with removable head!

Spindrift · 6th December 2010, 11:17 AM

I didn't know that Moses was a caucasian.

ZirconBlue · 8th December 2010, 08:33 AM

In college, my gaming group came up with some ideas for biblical action figures, including the Crucifiction Action Playset. The Jesus figure would have crucifiction action: squeeze his legs together and his arms go up.

And if you bought all the other apostles, you could collect points to send away for the Judas figure.

Moon-Spinner · 8th December 2010, 08:58 AM

Originally Posted by Juniversal

I wanna get the Jesus action figure so he can fight Optimus Prime. I wonder who'd win. Hmmm...

This will help with your question...

http://churchofprime.files.wordpress...04/vschart.jpg

Skeptic · 8th December 2010, 10:02 AM

You ain't seen nothin' yet.

By the way, the one where the two kids are playing football with Jesus is suspicious. One of them is taking Jesus down! Is that wise?

Thunder · 8th December 2010, 10:22 AM

Moses was a black man.

Spindrift · 8th December 2010, 10:27 AM

Originally Posted by ZirconBlue

In college, my gaming group came up with some ideas for biblical action figures, including the Crucifiction Action Playset. The Jesus figure would have crucifiction action: squeeze his legs together and his arms go up.

And if you bought all the other apostles, you could collect points to send away for the Judas figure.

Or just buy him for 30 pieces of silver?

Thunder · 8th December 2010, 10:30 AM

Um...where's the third tablet?

TubbaBlubba · 8th December 2010, 10:33 AM

I want a Stalin action figure...

Yeggster · 8th December 2010, 10:38 AM

Quote:

the story of moses has more action than a james bond movie ... His life was filled with dramatic events. With this 5 inch tall, hard plastic moses action figure you can recreate the entire epic saga in the comfort of your own home.

lol!

TubbaBlubba · 8th December 2010, 10:58 AM

I like the part where Moses suplexes Satan.

Moon-Spinner · 8th December 2010, 11:23 AM

He's 5 inches tall, a little larger than Star War toys, but still, you could pretend he's a new Dark Lord - Darth Moshe!!!

Although, it might tough trying to jam him into a Tie Fighter...

Achán hiNidráne · 8th December 2010, 11:46 AM

I've wanted to get a hold of those historical personage action figures and start up my own YouTube series:

It's ALBERT EINSTEIN and The Heroes of Reason! Also Starring:
Charles Darwin!
Mark Twain!
Marie Currie!
and Oscar Wilde!

Join us each week as they team up to fight the forces of Moses and his sycophantic henchman, Jesus!

TubbaBlubba · 8th December 2010, 11:56 AM

Originally Posted by Achán hiNidráne

I've wanted to get a hold of those historical personage action figures and start up my own YouTube series:

It's ALBERT EINSTEIN and The Heroes of Reason! Also Starring:
Charles Darwin!
Mark Twain!
Marie Currie!
and Oscar Wilde!

Join us each week as they team up to fight the forces of Moses and his sycophantic henchman, Jesus!

Not enough Richard Feynman.

AvalonXQ · 8th December 2010, 12:31 PM

Originally Posted by TubbaBlubba

Not enough Richard Feynman.

There's never enough Richard Feynman.

Juniversal · 8th December 2010, 12:35 PM

Originally Posted by Moon-Spinner

This will help with your question...

http://churchofprime.files.wordpress...04/vschart.jpg

Just as I suspected. The great Prime wins.

ZirconBlue · 8th December 2010, 01:16 PM

Originally Posted by Spindrift

Or just buy him for 30 pieces of silver?

Maybe the little tokens that you collect from each one could be little "pieces of silver". Some Apostles could have more than others, such that collecting them all added up to 30 pieces of silver to be redeemed for Judas.

ZirconBlue · 8th December 2010, 01:17 PM

Oh, we also thought that there should be a Parting the Red Sea bathtub playset.

Moon-Spinner · 8th December 2010, 02:04 PM

Originally Posted by ZirconBlue

Oh, we also thought that there should be a Parting the Red Sea bathtub playset.

Let's not forget the Stove-top "Pillar of Fire" expansion set!!!

Monketey Ghost · 8th December 2010, 02:17 PM

Originally Posted by Thunder

Um...where's the third tablet?

http://forums.randi.org/picture.php?...pictureid=4102

"My people, the Fifteen-- *smash* ... Ten. Ten Commandments!"

blue sock monkey · 8th December 2010, 06:44 PM

Originally Posted by AvalonXQ

There's never enough Richard Feynman.

Surely you're joking?

ReverendClog · 8th December 2010, 06:49 PM

Considering that 'parting the red sea' is a euphemism that Mrs. Clog and I use for sex - I Need one of these Moses figurines, badly.

Virus · 9th December 2010, 12:41 AM

They could kick his ass:

Skeptic · 9th December 2010, 12:52 AM

Originally Posted by Moon-Spinner

Let's not forget the Stove-top "Pillar of Fire" expansion set!!!

How about a "Burning Bush" cold cream against vaginal inflammation?

Skeptic · 9th December 2010, 12:53 AM

Originally Posted by ReverendClog

Considering that 'parting the red sea' is a euphemism that Mrs. Clog and I use for sex - I Need one of these Moses figurines, badly.

I think I can make an educated guess about the color of certain hairs on Mrs. Clog's body.

thull · 9th December 2010, 02:03 AM

Originally Posted by imagineaa

I saw these this morning in Rite-Aid in the toy aisle.

(Or at least I think that's the one. I didn't have much time to check it out.)

The description on Amazon normally would lead me to assume it's meant to be a spoof toy:

There was another one too, maybe Jesus or something else.
t.

The "frequently bought together" grouping on the amazon link made me laugh. Buy two Jews with some bacon bandages.

4th December 2010, 05:26 PM	#1
MatildaGage Muse Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Risa Posts: 799	Moses Action Figure I saw these this morning in Rite-Aid in the toy aisle. (Or at least I think that's the one. I didn't have much time to check it out.) The description on Amazon normally would lead me to assume it's meant to be a spoof toy: Quote: Use the removable shepherd's staff and stone tablets to punish your roommate with God's plagues or deliver the Ten Commandments to your little green army men. There was another one too, maybe Jesus or something else. I wonder how it made its way to the shelves of Rite-Aid? Is their buyer a JREF member? I wonder how long it will take for the persecution-complex Xians to make a stink about it.
	__________________ End the grisly, barbaric practice of metzitzah b'peh.

4th December 2010, 05:41 PM	#2
fuelair Cythraul Enfys Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 28,898	Cool + zombies. paparazi, raging crowd, B-movie frightened people and more (do not miss the dread Lunch Lady!!!). And, it was likely Jeebus - since they make one. No Mary Magdalene with removible costume though. I see a distinct market for Bad Girls of the Bible.
fuelair Cythraul Enfys Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 28,898	__________________ There is no problem so great that it cannot be fixed by small explosives carefully placed. Wash this space! We fight for the Lady Babylon!!!

4th December 2010, 05:55 PM	#3
MatildaGage Muse Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Risa Posts: 799	Oh my....check out the Jesus action figure on amazon. His hands glow in the dark. He comes with a jug of wine....I wonder if that pisses off the Baptists. They should make a Fred Phelps action figure.
	__________________ End the grisly, barbaric practice of metzitzah b'peh.

5th December 2010, 06:22 PM	#5
blue sock monkey Blithe Spirit Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: strumming my ukulele by Ol' Man River Posts: 1,954	Sadly, the talking version of the Moses action figure is sold out. Originally Posted by Tiktaalik There's a Crazy Cat Lady action figure, too... I *want* that. I hope Santa is listening.
	__________________ Find Dr StrangeOlympics, or How I learned to stop worrying & love the squirrel at http://bluesockmonkey.deviantart.com...38979?offset=0. And still more cartoons at: http://bluesockmonkey.stripgenerator.com/gallery/

5th December 2010, 06:54 PM	#6
Juniversal CIA + FBI + NWO Employee Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Cincinnati, USA Posts: 1,845	I wanna get the Jesus action figure so he can fight Optimus Prime. I wonder who'd win. Hmmm...
	__________________ "God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance." - Neil deGrasse Tyson

5th December 2010, 03:20 PM	#4
Tiktaalik Half True Scotsperson Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Colorado Posts: 1,981	There's a Crazy Cat Lady action figure, too...

6th December 2010, 11:09 AM	#7
jnelso99 Critical Thinker Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 444	http://www.entertainmentearth.com/hi...orical+Figures Sigmund Freud, Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Carl Jung, Ben Franklin, etc. Ooh - Marie Antoinette with removable head!
jnelso99 Critical Thinker Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 444

6th December 2010, 11:17 AM	#8
Spindrift Enturbulator Extraordinaire Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Right here! Posts: 8,445	I didn't know that Moses was a caucasian.
	__________________ I've always believed that cluelessness evolved as an adaptation to allow the truly appalling to live with themselves. - G. B. Trudeau A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. - Kay, Men in Black.

8th December 2010, 08:33 AM	#9
ZirconBlue Sole Survivor of L-Town Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Wilson, North Carolina, USA, Earth Posts: 11,311	In college, my gaming group came up with some ideas for biblical action figures, including the Crucifiction Action Playset. The Jesus figure would have crucifiction action: squeeze his legs together and his arms go up. And if you bought all the other apostles, you could collect points to send away for the Judas figure.
	__________________ Religion and sex are powerplays. Manipulate the people for the money they pay. Selling skin, selling God The numbers look the same on their credit cards.

8th December 2010, 08:58 AM	#10
Moon-Spinner Graduate Poster Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Within a star too far to dream of Posts: 1,483	Originally Posted by Juniversal I wanna get the Jesus action figure so he can fight Optimus Prime. I wonder who'd win. Hmmm... This will help with your question... http://churchofprime.files.wordpress...04/vschart.jpg

8th December 2010, 10:02 AM	#11
Skeptic Banned Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind the chessboard Posts: 18,361	You ain't seen nothin' yet. By the way, the one where the two kids are playing football with Jesus is suspicious. One of them is taking Jesus down! Is that wise?
	Last edited by Skeptic; 8th December 2010 at 10:04 AM.

8th December 2010, 10:22 AM	#12
Thunder Banned Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Queens Posts: 34,947	Moses was a black man.

8th December 2010, 10:27 AM	#13
Spindrift Enturbulator Extraordinaire Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Right here! Posts: 8,445	Originally Posted by ZirconBlue In college, my gaming group came up with some ideas for biblical action figures, including the Crucifiction Action Playset. The Jesus figure would have crucifiction action: squeeze his legs together and his arms go up. And if you bought all the other apostles, you could collect points to send away for the Judas figure. Or just buy him for 30 pieces of silver?
	__________________ I've always believed that cluelessness evolved as an adaptation to allow the truly appalling to live with themselves. - G. B. Trudeau A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. - Kay, Men in Black.

8th December 2010, 10:30 AM	#14
Thunder Banned Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Queens Posts: 34,947	Um...where's the third tablet?

8th December 2010, 10:33 AM	#15
TubbaBlubba Knave of the Dudes Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Communist Kingdom of Sweden Posts: 7,394	I want a Stalin action figure...
	__________________ Disagreement begets progress.

8th December 2010, 10:38 AM	#16
Yeggster Critical Thinker Join Date: May 2009 Location: Orillia, Ontario, Canada Posts: 460	Quote: the story of moses has more action than a james bond movie ... His life was filled with dramatic events. With this 5 inch tall, hard plastic moses action figure you can recreate the entire epic saga in the comfort of your own home. lol!

8th December 2010, 10:58 AM	#17
TubbaBlubba Knave of the Dudes Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Communist Kingdom of Sweden Posts: 7,394	I like the part where Moses suplexes Satan.
	__________________ Disagreement begets progress.

8th December 2010, 11:23 AM	#18
Moon-Spinner Graduate Poster Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Within a star too far to dream of Posts: 1,483	He's 5 inches tall, a little larger than Star War toys, but still, you could pretend he's a new Dark Lord - Darth Moshe!!! Although, it might tough trying to jam him into a Tie Fighter...

8th December 2010, 11:46 AM	#19
Achán hiNidráne Illuminator Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Muskego, WI. Posts: 3,979	I've wanted to get a hold of those historical personage action figures and start up my own YouTube series: It's ALBERT EINSTEIN and The Heroes of Reason! Also Starring: Charles Darwin! Mark Twain! Marie Currie! and Oscar Wilde! Join us each week as they team up to fight the forces of Moses and his sycophantic henchman, Jesus!
	__________________ "As the Corpse Lord knows, men today are ill-trained--ignoble: naught but wet anuses dribbling childish terrors and superstitions! Thus is knowledge--history, science, the world of the ancients--lost, never to be regained!" --M.A.R. Barker, "The Man of Gold"

8th December 2010, 11:56 AM	#20
TubbaBlubba Knave of the Dudes Join Date: Jul 2010 Location: Communist Kingdom of Sweden Posts: 7,394	Originally Posted by Achán hiNidráne I've wanted to get a hold of those historical personage action figures and start up my own YouTube series: It's ALBERT EINSTEIN and The Heroes of Reason! Also Starring: Charles Darwin! Mark Twain! Marie Currie! and Oscar Wilde! Join us each week as they team up to fight the forces of Moses and his sycophantic henchman, Jesus! Not enough Richard Feynman.
	__________________ Disagreement begets progress.

8th December 2010, 12:31 PM	#21
AvalonXQ Guest Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 11,853	Originally Posted by TubbaBlubba Not enough Richard Feynman. There's never enough Richard Feynman.
AvalonXQ Guest Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 11,853

8th December 2010, 12:35 PM	#22
Juniversal CIA + FBI + NWO Employee Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Cincinnati, USA Posts: 1,845	Originally Posted by Moon-Spinner This will help with your question... http://churchofprime.files.wordpress...04/vschart.jpg Just as I suspected. The great Prime wins.
	__________________ "God is an ever receding pocket of scientific ignorance." - Neil deGrasse Tyson

8th December 2010, 01:16 PM	#23
ZirconBlue Sole Survivor of L-Town Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Wilson, North Carolina, USA, Earth Posts: 11,311	Originally Posted by Spindrift Or just buy him for 30 pieces of silver? Maybe the little tokens that you collect from each one could be little "pieces of silver". Some Apostles could have more than others, such that collecting them all added up to 30 pieces of silver to be redeemed for Judas.
	__________________ Religion and sex are powerplays. Manipulate the people for the money they pay. Selling skin, selling God The numbers look the same on their credit cards.

8th December 2010, 01:17 PM	#24
ZirconBlue Sole Survivor of L-Town Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Wilson, North Carolina, USA, Earth Posts: 11,311	Oh, we also thought that there should be a Parting the Red Sea bathtub playset.
	__________________ Religion and sex are powerplays. Manipulate the people for the money they pay. Selling skin, selling God The numbers look the same on their credit cards.

8th December 2010, 02:04 PM	#25
Moon-Spinner Graduate Poster Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Within a star too far to dream of Posts: 1,483	Originally Posted by ZirconBlue Oh, we also thought that there should be a Parting the Red Sea bathtub playset. Let's not forget the Stove-top "Pillar of Fire" expansion set!!!

8th December 2010, 02:17 PM	#26
Monketey Ghost Body of Work Join Date: May 2003 Location: I'm on your screen! Posts: 14,806	Originally Posted by Thunder Um...where's the third tablet? http://forums.randi.org/picture.php?...pictureid=4102 "My people, the Fifteen-- smash ... Ten. Ten Commandments!"
	__________________ _{The membership of this forum is henceforth to refer to me as potato-headed Bobby} _{SSKCAS, member in long standing}

8th December 2010, 06:44 PM	#27
blue sock monkey Blithe Spirit Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: strumming my ukulele by Ol' Man River Posts: 1,954	Originally Posted by AvalonXQ There's never enough Richard Feynman. Surely you're joking?
	__________________ Find Dr StrangeOlympics, or How I learned to stop worrying & love the squirrel at http://bluesockmonkey.deviantart.com...38979?offset=0. And still more cartoons at: http://bluesockmonkey.stripgenerator.com/gallery/ Last edited by blue sock monkey; 8th December 2010 at 07:01 PM.

8th December 2010, 06:49 PM	#28
ReverendClog Banned Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Watching from a crack in the floorboards. Posts: 441	Considering that 'parting the red sea' is a euphemism that Mrs. Clog and I use for sex - I Need one of these Moses figurines, badly.

9th December 2010, 12:41 AM	#29
Virus Master Templar Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Australia Posts: 6,198	They could kick his ass:

9th December 2010, 12:52 AM	#30
Skeptic Banned Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind the chessboard Posts: 18,361	Originally Posted by Moon-Spinner Let's not forget the Stove-top "Pillar of Fire" expansion set!!! How about a "Burning Bush" cold cream against vaginal inflammation?

9th December 2010, 12:53 AM	#31
Skeptic Banned Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Behind the chessboard Posts: 18,361	Originally Posted by ReverendClog Considering that 'parting the red sea' is a euphemism that Mrs. Clog and I use for sex - I Need one of these Moses figurines, badly. I think I can make an educated guess about the color of certain hairs on Mrs. Clog's body.

9th December 2010, 02:03 AM	#32
thull Scholar Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 86	Originally Posted by imagineaa I saw these this morning in Rite-Aid in the toy aisle. (Or at least I think that's the one. I didn't have much time to check it out.) The description on Amazon normally would lead me to assume it's meant to be a spoof toy: There was another one too, maybe Jesus or something else. t. The "frequently bought together" grouping on the amazon link made me laugh. Buy two Jews with some bacon bandages.
thull Scholar Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 86