Dissociative Identity Disorder: A Solution For Relgious Paranoia

CplFerro · 12th August 2007, 08:09 PM

Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely? My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels."

Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed?

Cpl Ferro

Senor_Pointy · 12th August 2007, 08:25 PM

Only if it involves filtering scans of your brain through the color green.

Tumblehome · 12th August 2007, 10:28 PM

Before inducing multiple personality disorder and destroying your memory, thus having no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels"...

...I would try to fix the religious paranoia. That's probably best done without stimulants of any kind.

Marquis de Carabas · 12th August 2007, 10:41 PM

Originally Posted by CplFerro

Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely? My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels."

Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed?

Cpl Ferro

You're screwed. For your plan to succeed, you would have to have one personality devoted to each possible religious dogma, since the possibility remains that none of the currently realised dogmas are correct. The domain of possible beliefs is infinite.

Of course, several possible dogmas include the tenet that anyone who has attempted, successfully or not, to split their personality is destined for eternal torment.

You could take some comfort, I suppose, in the fact that just as many possible dogmas would assert that this splitting is essential for salvation.

But, really, you're screwed. Start praying the atheists are right.

frank462 · 13th August 2007, 05:18 AM

Check out this cartoon at Russell's Teapot:
Cartoon

Dancing David · 13th August 2007, 07:15 AM

Originally Posted by CplFerro

Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely?

be a polytheist?

Quote:

My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels."

Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed?

Cpl Ferro

If this is not tongue in cheek, you might want to consider depression/anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder. (BTW there are no multiple personalities.)

Intrusive thoughts are very real, I had a paranoid fear of death by fire and death by car crash, the worst was the intrusive thought of death by fiery car crash. Then there was the intrusive thought I lived with for about eight years that I would have to eat everything I threw away in some sort of after life. I made sure I had plenty of Taco Bell sauce to go with the diapers!

Fortunately my OCD and depression is well treated, life is a little duller but more contented.

12th August 2007, 08:09 PM	#1
CplFerro Graduate Poster Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 1,383	Dissociative Identity Disorder: A Solution For Relgious Paranoia Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely? My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels." Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed? Cpl Ferro

12th August 2007, 10:41 PM	#4
Marquis de Carabas Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: vuori Posts: 27,106	Originally Posted by CplFerro Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely? My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels." Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed? Cpl Ferro You're screwed. For your plan to succeed, you would have to have one personality devoted to each possible religious dogma, since the possibility remains that none of the currently realised dogmas are correct. The domain of possible beliefs is infinite. Of course, several possible dogmas include the tenet that anyone who has attempted, successfully or not, to split their personality is destined for eternal torment. You could take some comfort, I suppose, in the fact that just as many possible dogmas would assert that this splitting is essential for salvation. But, really, you're screwed. Start praying the atheists are right.
	__________________ Jesus ... wasn't he the bloke who turned fish into wine and made the lepers multiply? -KateHL Violence is more acceptable than incest. I have been told to keep this in mind.

13th August 2007, 05:18 AM	#5
frank462 Philosophical Taoist Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Indianapolis, Indiana (USA) Posts: 306	Check out this cartoon at Russell's Teapot: Cartoon
	__________________ "I know I look like a buddha but you can't burn incense in my navel!"

13th August 2007, 07:15 AM	#6
Dancing David Penultimate Amazing Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Central Illinois Posts: 34,717	Originally Posted by CplFerro Thinking about my horrible religious paranoia again today, it occurred to me that the only way to be safe would be to adopt every religion out there, just in case, covering all the bases, so to speak. But how to do this sincerely? be a polytheist? Quote: My solution is to try to find a way to induce multiple personality disorder, with each personality fanatically adopting a single religion. Perhaps in order to cement the deal I would need to find a way to destroy my memory of what I had done, and thus would have no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels." Do you think the Powers of the universe will buy it, or am I screwed? Cpl Ferro If this is not tongue in cheek, you might want to consider depression/anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder. (BTW there are no multiple personalities.) Intrusive thoughts are very real, I had a paranoid fear of death by fire and death by car crash, the worst was the intrusive thought of death by fiery car crash. Then there was the intrusive thought I lived with for about eight years that I would have to eat everything I threw away in some sort of after life. I made sure I had plenty of Taco Bell sauce to go with the diapers! Fortunately my OCD and depression is well treated, life is a little duller but more contented.
	__________________ Hell, dynamiting fish in a barrel is more challenging. - Ladewig I suspect you are a sandwich, metaphorically speaking. -Donn And a shot rang out. Now Space is doing time... -Ben Burch You built the toilet - don't complain when people crap in it. _Kid Eager

12th August 2007, 08:25 PM	#2
Senor_Pointy Fruity Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Sideways Posts: 364	Only if it involves filtering scans of your brain through the color green.

12th August 2007, 10:28 PM	#3
Tumblehome Graduate Poster Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Beside the point Posts: 1,445	Before inducing multiple personality disorder and destroying your memory, thus having no "original" personality to return to, only an endless, random flickering between different religious "channels"... ...I would try to fix the religious paranoia. That's probably best done without stimulants of any kind.